I Know We All Love To Overthink Stuff But Its Important To Remember Not To Lose Yourself In The Process.

Got a haircut, where the hell is my bandana? Where’s the cinnamon-scented spray for my fur? Where’s my treat?

I think they should be welcomed here but they should (and I mean the general tiktok side of the community) mature a little? I think the culture shock will help a little, but both of us can see that there are bad parts specifically of the tiktok branch that should be shed off over time

Like the demonizing of certain dysphorias or how to deal it, or how they handle disabled and disordered people in their community

With all my complaints I have with that side of the community, I don't hate them nor do I want them to stay away, I want to mature though so they can be kinder to each other and themselves, as the discourse they have over there has hurt people

okay, ive seen way too many posts on the community tags talking about the tiktok ban and saying stuff like "i hope tiktok therians dont come in here theyre so awful and i hate them lol". and... i dont know what to tell you guys, i think thats mean as hell.

imagine, just for a second, that youre a therian on tiktok. at 13 years old, youve found a friendly community where people express themselves with masks, tails, and a type of movement called quadrobics. they seem to be having fun, so you decide to join in. and for a while, youre having fun too! you start practicing quadrobics, which is tough at first but you work hard to get better. you ask your parents for some cat masks, which you decorate with paint and faux fur. you make videos of yourself and your friends, wearing cat masks and dancing on all fours to some bland indie song.

then, out of nowhere, one of your posts goes viral. and suddenly, youre not having fun anymore.

"therians are crazy", "if you identify as a dog you should be chained and made to sleep naked outside", "my little brother came out as a therian and i bullied him until he stopped lol", "if i see a therian in the woods im shooting them", "if you want to be an animal, ill treat you like one".

again, YOURE 13. so you get defensive, because people you dont know are attacking you online and as a young teen, you dont know what to do to make it stop. so instead of confronting them, you try to please them instead. "im not crazy, im just having fun" turns into "i dont identify as an animal, only crazy people do that!" and then to "therians dont actually think were animals; thats lycanthropy and its wrong". this is what others in your community are saying, so it must be true, right? it helps slow down the criticism at least, if only for a little while; even if it never fully goes away. so you keep saying it, even to others in your community, because if it protects you from judgment, why not?

but now youre dealing with the possibility of your platform disappearing. youll lose your friends, the community youve worked so hard to be a part of. you heard some friends say they might switch to instagram if tiktok gets banned, while others prefer reddit or tumblr. Feeling curious (you didnt realize there were therians on other sites!), you decide to check out tumblr to see what that community is like there. the first post you come across at the top of the tag? "i hope tiktok therians dont come here theyre so awful and i hate them lol".

so yeah. thats the problem with making blanket statements like these; it only pushes away members of our own community. shame is not a motivator, and your aggressiveness gets us nowhere. remember, one catches more flies with honey than with vinegar. so be kind.

Man I make one post that doesn't go into an entire essay and people assume I've seen the things they've seen, which I have not

I think this is because people (especially on TikTok) like to point to figures of authority even when it's not applicable

A good majority of this we can also blame on right wingers, transmeds, and a small bit of those very specific detrans grifters who make it seem like the trans community "groomed them"

All those groups went for years going on about how dysphoria is a very special mental illness to the point of taking away people's autonomy on how people perceive themselves

Species dysphoria *is* somewhat recognized, just not fully or medically (and I'm not sure it would really be good if it was either or both of those considering how most people treat clinical zoanthropes already)

But people can't point to a disorder and (think) they can't point to any papers (despite them existing) so it MUST NOT EXIST! the assumed authority has said so! (Which should be left to the creature, not anyone else). But if species dysphoria *does* get medically recognized then you're gonna be called even more delusional than usual because "look! It's a disorder! Something is clearly wrong with YOU!"

I hate when I mention species dysphoria on tiktok and half or more of the comments I get are telling me it's not real or I cant use the term dysphoria for that, I've already gone into why dysphoria is a okay term to use several times, but like you can't just say its not real when many others experience it- sure I don't think its recognized in the medical field (might be wrong idk) but that doesn't just erase others feelings and experiences

Like I'm just confused what people think commenting that isn't real is gonna do, doesn't change what Im feeling, I wish it did honestly because I'm tired of feeling like this but like obviously it's not changing anytime soon even if you decide to pretend like Im making it up for some reason

i love the others of these i’ve been seeing so i made myself some custom ones heheh

if you want one made send me a request on my side blog @strugglekin with your kin, pronouns and a colour!

i think gatekeeping is unfathomably cringe and i think the way people in this community treat linkers (funlinkers especially) and voluntary identities in general is gross, but i recently came across an exchange that was really irritating to be fair and made me kind of understand the defensiveness.

it was in a comment thread under a video where a streamer was talking about a twitter user who was being 'cancelled' and they must have listed their fictionkins on their strawpage because that's what the comment was about.

person 1: i thought kinning meant that you related to a character?

person 2: it does mean that, not that you actually think you're that character.

person 3: i'm kin and it means that you relate heavily to a character, ppl who identify as "fictionkins" and genuinely think they're fictional characters are just deluded and make us look bad.

like no, that's not what "kinning" means at all. as far as i'm aware, kinning has always meant that you identify as a character in some capacity until people who weren't a part of the kin community made out like it meant something completely unrelated while looking down on people who are actually fictionkin or "kinnies", which is probably where the defensive aspect to the community comes from.

you have co-opted a term that has always meant one thing, said it means something completely different, and then turned around and call the people who use the term in its traditional meaning 'delusional'. that is very disrespectful. for the record i think term discourse is dumb and you can use whatever labels you want, but i understand the frustration.

to more or less usurp the term 'kinning' or 'kinnie' or whatever and twist it to mean your own definition, then claim that the people who the term has always belonged to are 'delusional' is just awful and absurd. "kinning" has always meant that you identify as a character.

personally i am funlink and all of my identities are voluntary and for fun and i use the term kinning to describe that aspect of myself, but i would never look down on involuntary fictionkins or claim that their terms mean something else entirely when it doesn't.

Good naps will have you sleeping in poses usually reserved for dead insects

Wanting a creature themed packer

Being schizo-spec

Being an adult

Having subtype fluid kintypes

Being therian for nearly a decade and still haven't fully figured out my nonhuman identities

Being physically unable to do quads

Physically seeing myself as nonhuman

Not having a mask

Generally wanting to be violent and not just "oooh silly doooogggg :3"

Polykin

Pseudo kin feels?

Having an uncommon kintype (anteater)

+ more probably

NEW CHALLENGE: tell every aspect of your alterhumanity that would get you fake-claimed by TikTok therians /lh

-I do not have any memories as a fictionkin, am am purely psychological

-That being said I never experience shifts either

-probably just being conceptkin and placekin as well though

Therians be like