If The Next Red Hood Run Doesn't Involve Jason And Roy Having Full Sex I'm Burning Down Dc Headquarters

Alpha-17 and Obi-Wan being friends (derogatory) on 17's part and friends (threatening) on Obi-Wan's part is such an underrated dynamic

They could be so funny and terrifying, like Obi-Wan went through a soul shredding experience with Alpha-17 as his only company. They're friends because what else are you gonna be after you witness each other at absolute rock bottom from torture.

It's like 'dog put in cage of cheetah who's threatening to go crazy', except the dog is a grizzly bear and also threatening to go crazy.

Emotional support trooper except the trooper in question has never done any sort of supporting in his life and is actively an emotional distress trooper to a great number of the CC batch.

I want them texting everyday, I want Obi-Wan mailing handmade BFF bracelets to Alpha and Alpha sending pics back of him flipping off the camera but still wearing them, I want Alpha using Obi-Wan to keep track of and occasionally terrorize his cadets, I want 17 ending problems in the GAR (like Krell) before they begin because Obi-Wan has him shipped out on a personal transport at the first opportunity, decked out with slug-throwers Obi-Wan got him for his decant-day.

Natborn officers think this is all just an odd indulgence of General Kenobi, the Vode, however, correctly identify it as a goddamn threat and their danger assessment of Obi-Wan ticks up significantly.

When Alpha arrives on Kamino, Shaak Ti presses a shiny new comm into his hand. It has the Jedi Order symbol painted onto it alongside a smiley face sticker, and it pings immediately with a new message: Hello! I hope you're settling in well!

Alpha stares at the message, stares at the singular contact named 'OWK' and then stares Shaak Ti in the eye as he pitches the comm straight into the ocean. Shaak Ti's serene smile only grows larger as she calmly reaches into her robes and pulls out an identical comm, only this one has a frowny face sticker, and presses it into his hand. It lights up: I'm afraid we've bonded, Alpha :). Alpha shuts it off and pockets it with resignation.

Cody arrives on Alpha-17's personal recommendation.

A-17: He's the most difficult little bastard I have. You're perfect for each other. OWK: Thank you, he's very handsome :3 A-17: No. Stop.

The first thing he asks once he gets comfortable is who his general is texting so much that has him swinging his legs and twirling his hair. Cody assumes it's Anakin, given they seem joint at the hip anyway, but little does he know Obi-Wan's ability to consistently have the Weirdest Relationships Ever.

"Oh, it's Alpha-17, I understand you're familiar with each other?" Hmm. OK. Cody.exe is experiencing a processing error, please hold. He exits the room instead of answering. The next day he peeks over the General's shoulder when he's texting and sees walls of rambling messages from Obi-Wan. Alpha-17 replies every hour with a single text: Lose this number. Obi-Wan giggles. "He's so funny." he says.

When Obi-Wan meets the rest of the CC batch, Cody makes sure to stand perfectly angled so that he can record the reactions when his general cuts off their introductions with "Oh, no need, Alpha-17's told me all about you." It's always immediate FEAR.JPG followed by a slow spiral of What The Fuck.

What do you mean by that General. What does that mean Cody. What do you mean they text. No. Cody. What the fuck is happening, Cody. Alpha-17 doesn't have friends he has enemies and enemies he tolerates enough not to shoot on sight.

OWK: Wolffe reached for his vambrace? when I mentioned you A-17: That's where he keeps his spare knife. OWK: Hm that does explain the way he eyed me up, ambitious. A-17: Clearly not enough, he should have followed through. I taught them better.

Jayroy headcanons

Jason likes to be in Roy's workshop with him. They don't have to talk. But Jason will just rest his head on Roy's thigh and read.

Jason steals broken/old pieces of Bat-tech for Roy to experiment with.

The boyfriend tax. It is abused because they have a one inch height difference (canon. Jason: 6'0, and Roy: 5'11).

Jason isn't very touchy, but he is a sleep cuddler. So Roy had a reason to try to get Jason to sleep with him (wholesome only).

Roy is not allowed to cut his hair. Jason has forbid it.

Roy goes on rants about his experiments, or whatever he's hyperfixating on. Jason goes on rants about his books. And they both listen and ask genuine questions.

Okay so we have like. An unusually high ratio of royalty/nobility among the Jedi. Dooku, Quinlan, Oppo, you can sort of count Adi or Xanatos or Bruck, etc. Lots of Jedi 'just happen' to come from royal, noble, or incredibly wealthy/powerful families.

So from this I want to posit four things:

If a royal family has a Force-Sensitive child, and hasn't had one in generations, they may think that sending that child to the Jedi would be a little like sending a child to join the Catholic Church in the middle ages: you get to influence the political choices of the highest religious power in Europe the Galactic Republic Government. (That said, Dooku was sent to the Jedi because his parents didn't want him and ||left him to die of exposure, basically, so that if the Jedi arrived too late they'd be picking up a baby corpse|| because they were so disdainful of Force-Sensitive individuals, and Quinlan wasn't sent to the Jedi so much as he escaped to them.)

They are all incredibly wrong about this, and royals raised as Jedi generally do not give any more of a shit about their home planets than any other planet. They care, of course, but they are not attached, because they are Jedi. Xanatos was an exception (afaik his dad sent him to the Jedi because he wanted to do the Catholic thing? and then Xanatos lost his mind). (Don't correct me on this, it's not really important if it was actually intended or not.)

This is achieved by way of Jedi from royal backgrounds having a mandatory high-level political class on how to handle royal court politics and general intrigue. It's not exclusive to the royal kids, but it is a prerequisite for them. They usually end up doing their home planets as case studies for capstone projects, in part because

Sometimes the planets try to call their errant royals back. It might be because the planet is struggling and genuinely running out of heirs/needs a change in leadership (Serreno) and it might be because it was the plan all along, but on the off chance that the Jedi decides they HAVE to leave the Order and take up a throne to keep an entire planet from kind of imploding on itself... that royal Jedi has to be ready to play the game. OR if they don't actually think they're REALLY needed there, they have to be trained on how to go, and be polite/avoid getting trapped/play the game until they can get the hell out of there, while also installing that cousin that nobody thought was strong enough but DOES understand how to run the treasury as the new king.

I'm just imagining this like. Very specific set of classes that are open to any Jedi that's taken the necessary prereqs, but is mandatory for people like Quinlan and Dooku and Oppo.

This was inspired by a post of mine that's getting circulated regarding QuinObi stuff and my thoughts about how Quinlan might have needed preventative training in case of political upheavals trying to pull him back to his home planet. I want to mess with the Politics Classes that Quinlan is taking because he has to and Obi-Wan is taking because Qui-Gon said he should.

Qui-Gon: You should take this class because I'm training you up as a negotiator and diplomat, and you will need it to interact with people when brokering trade deals or peace treaties. Tholme: You are taking this class because your aunt is insane and you have to be ready in case she tries to pull you back into the bullshit.

And as @firebirdeternal offered:

Quinlan: God this is the worst. So boring. At least Obi-Wan is stuck here too. Obi-wan: This is fascinating wow, I can't believe I almost didn't get to attend, Quinlan is so lucky he's automatically in these classes.

It is a truth universally acknowledged that Batman isn’t the only one fiercely protective of his Robins.

Jason’s death led to the Rogues turning against the Joker—especially Harley. By then, she had already realized the extent of his abuse and had left him. So when she learned that her favorite Robin—a tough Crime Alley kid—had been beaten to death by her ex the first time she wasn’t around, she went ballistic.

Once, a newcomer held Nightwing at gunpoint and tried to unmask him on live television. When Harvey Dent saw how close this was to his own hideout, he knew he couldn’t let it slide. He wasn’t blind or foolish—he knew exactly who Nightwing was. The first Robin. A ray of sunshine—badass yet kind. Harvey took only a second to recall how that same little Robin had once helped him through a dissociative episode, choosing to assist rather than arrest him. And that was enough. The newcomer was never seen again.

As much as Damian disliked how close Catwoman was to his father, Selina adored the little kitten. He was honest, fierce, and compassionate in his own way. She loved that he shared her fondness for cats and animals. So when the shelter Damian volunteered at was attacked by Black Mask’s goons, Selina made sure that by the end of the month, Roman wouldn’t have a single piece of art left in his collection.

Eddie could hardly deny that his favorite Robin was the third one. After all, that particular little bird not only respected him as the Riddler but could also solve all his riddles effortlessly. So when a few goons rudely barged into their monthly riddle session, Eddie was not amused. He made sure they knew it.

Consider this your warning: Do not harm the Robins. Unless, of course, you fancy some trouble with the Rogues.

Ok so I had an idea about Ody’s eventual death

Hermes’s smile was tinged with sadness, something unusual for the god. “Hello, old friend.”

“Hello, Hermes.” Odysseus pulled his gaze from his body, wrapped in the funeral shroud lovingly made by Penelope, to the bag in his hands. His fingers clutched it tighter, and he looked up at the messenger god. “Do you think they’ll hate me?”

“They will be angry, but they could never hate their captain.” Hermes took Odysseus’s hand. “It’s time to go.”

Hermes’s hand tightened, so much that Odysseus’s spectral hand would have felt crushed under his godly strength. His feet left the ground, going faster and faster and faster, trailing behind Hermes like the trail of a shooting star. Maybe that’s what he looked like when he delivered souls, Odysseus didn’t know.

His feet touched down on the bank of the river Styx, where over six hundred familiar faces currently waited. Odysseus’s feet hit the ground soundlessly a moment later. This would take some getting used to.

“Goodbye, Odysseus of Ithaca. I’ll… I’ll miss fighting by your side.”

That may have been one of the most genuine things Hermes had ever said. Odysseus smiled and fiddled with his bag. “Hermes? Thank you.”

“Don’t thank me, friend, you died,” he said. “Good luck.”

He vanished with a blur of orange light.

Odysseus took a deep breath. It was time.

He walked—slowly, so slowly—towards his old crew. One by one, they turned to face him. Their eyes fell on his bag, and his old, wizened face, proof of a long life. Odysseus wanted to hide it, but he knew he must remain confident in his decisions from all those years ago.

“Comrades.” His eyes fell on two faces he longed to see- one tall, clean-shaven man with dark skin, and one man with a red cloth headband and a mess of curly hair. “Friends. I come after years of keeping you waiting, and for that I beg your forgiveness.” His eyes fell upon Eurylochus. “But I hope that this can sate your desires to leave this place.”

His hands tugged at the string keeping his bag together, and it came undone, almost as if it were waiting for this moment. Six hundred men saw it open, and a murmur went through them. It contained gold—so much gold that they could all get across the river.

Whispers turned to murmurs, but nobody moved forwards to come get a coin. A huge gap remained between Odysseus and the six hundred men he outlived. His shoulders drooped.

One man stepped forwards. Eurylochus of Same, his second in command. He picked out a coin from the bag, then held it up in the air. “Let’s hear it for Odysseus, our captain.”

The murmurs started up again, until the sound of clapping came from the middle of the crowd. Polites.

Ghostly tears flowed down Odysseus’s face as more and more men joined in. They all started to move towards him, cheering for him. Cheering for the life he got to have. Cheering for the chance to finally be together as a crew again.

Thanks for reading! I’d just like to say that my Hermes transportation scene was mostly based on @witless-winion1 ‘s Ctimene fic.

REBLOG IF ITS OKAY TO TALK TO YOU.

Please.

Ahsoka sipping on some hot chocolate: Where's the fire?

Rex frantically rushing past Ahsoka: Jesse dared Fives to try out his pick up lines on Kenobi! I have to stop this!

Ahsoka now jogging along with him: Master Obi-wan is pretty chill, I'm sure it'll be fine.

Rex: It's not Kenobi I'm worried about.

-----------------

Fives, seating himself down across from Obi-wan in the mess: Your robes look nice today sir.

Members of Ghost now staring at Fives in horror:

Obi-wan, trying not to laugh: Oh? Thank you.

Fives, ignoring the shadow that falls across him: You know where they'd look even better?

Cody, hand suddenly gripping Fives shoulder, with the most deadpan menacing voice: Where would that be trooper?

Fives, life flashing before his eyes: Right where they're at sir!

There’s something about Roy’s specific kind of abandonment issues. A lot of other characters, they’ll distance themselves, they’ll stop themselves from getting attached, they’ll put up a wall and push people away. Roy? Generally speaking, he’s always open. He loves so easily, he’ll get attached to people so quickly. He puts himself out there, he gives his whole heart, and every time he’s hoping that this time he’ll be good enough for someone to stay, but every time he’s so scared that he won’t be good enough, that eventually they’ll leave. And every time he’s proven right. It’s Roy Harper’s tragedy. He’ll always lose the ones he loves, no matter how hard he tries. He’ll try and try and try, he’ll let people back into his life the second they ask, but they’ll always leave again. And in his mind, he’ll never be enough.

Dynamic duo(father and son)

jokes on you, i'm all of the above!

"people who stay up at night are either insomniac or In love" people who stay up at night read gay fanfiction on AO3 what are you on about?