They Are The Toxic Yaoi Blueprint

You know what?

I love you, fics that take months to update. I click on the newest chapter and have no memory of this place and get to go back some chapters and rediscover how much i love everything about this story.

I love you, fics that take years to update. I think of you fondly, and know your names, go search for you and see an update from this year and scream, diving in uncaring of any missed details (i will finish the update and read you in reverse because this is a treat you have bestowed)

I love you, fics that probably will never update again. Thank you for being a roman empire for my mind, thank you for teaching me about the ephemeral fandom experience, for inspiring a thousand million what if-s, for being a comfort read and a nostalgia read and a reread.

I love you fic writers, who jump into projects and stories with enthusiasm. I love you when you succeed in pumping out those chapters and that love doesn't go away when you stop.

I love you fic writers who post and then get in your own head and never feel confident enough to update, whether it's at all or whether it's just that one story.

I love you fic writers, who have a fandom or media hurt you to the point of abandoning or having a hard time with their WIPs.

I love you fic writers, who lose interest or have life changes or illness or bad memory. Thank you for being part of the fandom, a core part of the fandom. Thank you for the time spent in the fandom.

I love you, fic writers who try out something new and then stop. You're so valid.

I love you, WIP fics that may or may not ever get finished. Thank you for brightening my day in the way only you could have.

Jason: it’s always “we love you, you’re apart of our family too, you’re enjoyable to be around, please come home for dinner, blah blah blah,” until you make ONE trauma compensating joke…

Duke: Jason you said “damn this chicken tastes better than the concrete floor of that warehouse lmao” on the anniversary of your own death

Tim: you literally made dick cry

finally got around to properly reading “batman: under the hood” (or “under the red hood” idk man i’ve seen it both ways) and this right here made me so viscerally sick when i saw it i had to take a moment

(under the cut cause this gets long)

for context if you haven’t read, or just don’t remember, this is from issue #13, the crux of the the bruce/jason/joker storyline. prior to this panel, jason expresses his anger and hurt from bruce not avenging him after joker killed him. he asks bruce why joker is still alive, why he hasn’t killed him yet. bruce explains it would be too easy to put him through all the pain and torture joker has brought upon to others (which, btw, very intimate details here. something about how sex and violence go hand in hand with them, blah blah blah i’m crazy) and to kill him. jason shoots back that this isn’t someone like penguin, scarecrow, etc. it’s the joker. in jason’s words, a “psychotic piece of filth” and “death-worshiping garbage.”

jason says, “doing it [killing joker] because… because he took me away from you.” and that’s when bruce delivers this killer in the panel above.

and i have never felt so sick upon seeing a panel before when i saw this one.

cause it reminded me so much of this panel from the killing joke:

the way both joker and bruce are facing off to the side, obscuring their bodies from the person they’re speaking to, that person being such an important fixture to them. how both of them reject what the other person is asking of them, to compromise everything they believe and know about themselves for what can be seen as the greater good. there’s something to be said as well about how the panels parallel each other, but the enemies are facing opposite directions. bruce turned to the left, joker to the right. maybe something about opposing moral stances, opposing sides of justice. something about being both opposite and yet the same.

you might be thinking “isn’t it a bit much to say this made you feel sick?” well. probably. but they make me feel sick all the time. and there’s something about this pinnacle moment in under the hood mirroring the pinnacle moment from the killing joke. two comics that play such a big role in shaping bruce’s relationship with joker and with his family (in relation to him and joker, if that makes sense).

anyway. i’m sure this was an intentional reference, i’ve just never seen it discussed before. thought i’d share it here cause i can’t stop thinking about it (and i don’t have enough characters on twitter). i hope any of this is coherent. idk if i even got everything i wanted to say about this parallel cause my brain is so scrambled rn.

they ruined my life fuck them fr i hate them sm

my joker as other jokers!

You two go cringe together then lol

So I watched the new deadpool movie! Have a messy drawing

[click for better quality, reblogs and tags highly appreciated]

(for @mustasekittens <3)

dabihawks with their kids 🌸

ppl rly liked the damian + batcow doodle so I coloured it in!!!

bfs (derogatory) ♥