monsteradarling

Latest Posts by monsteradarling

Totally agree, and I would also argue that connecting with other women is the most important first step. Actually taking time to build up the care and empathy for other women is huge. The patriarchy constantly pits woman against woman to prevent us from working together.

You can give up the makeup, love your body hair, abandon the need for male acceptance or approval - but if you don't teach yourself to care for other women, and give other women grace, and understand female socialisation, then all you're doing is partially freeing your physical self while upholding the patriarchy elsewhere.

Considering that the patriarchy also wants to crush us so that we're always kind to men and hyper critical of other women, centring women and actually saving that kindness for other women trains us to be kinder to ourselves, too, which builds our confidence and empowers us to stand up even taller against men.

It's admirable if one day, you can wake up and completely deprogram yourself from misogyny and the patriarchy in one go but it's also OK if:

You start wearing less makeup or wearing makeup less often rather than completely stopping

You start to let your body hair grow a little longer before shaving instead of never letting it grow more than stubble

You stop making new male friends but keep the ones that you have

You share resources online about community efforts before helping in person

You disengage from conversations where casual misogyny or full blown misogyny is used rather than challenging it

Everyone starts somewhere. We don't all have the ability to change our lives completely overnight.

But you have to put in the work to do more and get out of your comfort zone. Women's liberation doesn't happen if we all just do the minimum.

It's a good place to start but you have to learn how to push yourself to do more.

We had icebreaker questions about who our personal heroes are and if I wouldn’t get kicked out and blacklisted from the career for saying it I would have said JKR.

Even if we ignore all the trans stuff - a woman who escaped an abusive relationship with a baby who then went on to write the most successful children’s fantasy series of all time, to the point where she became a billionaire but then lost that status because of her charitable contributions and actually paying UK taxes instead of tax evasion like most other rich people.

She then wrote (an incredibly successful in its own right) adult detective series under a pseudonym, set up several of her own charities for women and children like Volant Charitable Trust, Lumos and Beira’s Place and supported more, including rescuing hundreds of Afghans from the Taliban.

She’s anti- Netanyahu but in like a normal way, not supporting cultural boycott of Israel or anything that would hurt regular Israelis.

All of this makes her incredibly achieved and successful, and yet she still has morals and principles and hasn’t turned into a monster like many rich people do. She’s an incredible role model and hero.

Happy Pride Month! To kick off pride I'm busting some myths about the Stonewall Riots, Marsha P. Johnson, and giving some love and recognition to Stormé DeLarverie!

This was sitting unfinished for months but I got it together and completed it in time for pride.

Edit (6/12/23): I believe only the first Joseph Ambrosini photo was confirmed to be taken the first night of the Stonewall riots; I couldn't find sources that indicated if the other photos were taken on that same night or not.

Stop trying to find a good man. Trying to find a good man is almost as futile as finding a unicorn. Sure, very rarely, maybe it is possible to find someone decent, but most likely? This will be what your life is like if you choose to partner up with a man. If not, you’ll have at the very least encounter men like this before finding the one, so taking all that into consideration, is the process of hunting down a good man really worth it?

I knew it was a TIF because there was a mention of "trans men" in there and wanting to reject the actual use of the word "woman," but I wasn't prepared for the self-satisfied, smug pose on her actual Yale page.

Sage Journals

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Actual dystopian level sick this is. Legitimately floored. What the actual fuck.

“”I argue that pregnancy is not to be defined by biological phenomena but instead as a genre of political, aesthetic, and affective experience and expectation. As a multidimensional genre of experience, rather than merely a biological datum, pregnancy can potentially establish a shared ground between trans and cis women. Pregnancy is an existential experience involving birth and becoming in a larger sense. We need a more all-encompassing notion of pregnancy””

Pregnancy is not a haha fun little inclusive to all club. Are you fucking kidding me.

Genuinely proud of myself for being cigarette-free for an entire year today.

9 out of 10 times ejaculating in a woman will throw her pH off for a few weeks if not months. BV and yeast infections are wildly common in women who let their partners ejaculate in them. A lot of women endure this issue for life and are blamed for having “smelly vaginas” when the root cause is semen disrupting the microbiome. That article you cited is questionable for sure and we shouldnt refer to women as cum brained, but semen disrupts vaginal health the majority of the time. Its why so many women get yeast infections attempting to conceive.

Alrighty, lets dissect this.

Yes: semen is alkaline — its PH is usually around 7.1 to 8. The vagina, on the other hand, is naturally acidic with a PH around 3.8 to 4.5. That acidity is what keeps the vaginal microbiome healthy, especially the dominance of lactobacillus bacteria, which help fight off infections.

So yes, ejaculation can temporarily raise the vaginal pH. But to say it “throws off the PH for weeks or months” in 90% of cases? This is not backed by science. At all.

The vagina is designed to rebalance itself. It has a robust ability to restore its normal pH after mild disruptions.

Women don’t get an infection every time they have unprotected sex with a man. If that were true, literally millions of women that are engaging in sexually active relationships would be living in constant infection mode — and we’re just not seeing that reflected in population health studies.

What is true:

BV and yeast infections are super common

They can be triggered by PH disruption — from semen, yes, but also periods, antibiotics, scented soaps, douching, new partners, stress, diet, etc.

Some women are more prone to an imbalance than others (immune stuff, genetics, hormones, etc.)

But that doesn’t mean semen is toxic waste. Again, we have debunked that made up 9/10 number.

Also, the broad statement that women “endure this for life” is wrong. Recurrent infections in women prone to them suck but they’re perfectly treatable and preventative measures can be taken. Don’t shame women with fear-based stats.

is there sources that semen change women's brain?

All I know of is Trust Your Perceptions who cites all her research.

Trust Your Perceptions

Semen: Men’s Chemical War Against Women. No-Skip Intro.

all original writing copyrighted, 2016, by Trust Your Perceptions Part I here. Part II here. Part III here. Part IV here. Part V here. Appen

I guy in my fyp said today

“Actions taken by men are favors and actions taken by woman are duties”

And I have been just sitting staring into space for about an hour now.

Because this applies to every aspect of woman’s life. Every single one.

I knew this. I just hadn’t given it the proper sentence.

[Boston Bisexual Women’s Network, June/July 1995]

Isn't it strange how the gender movement has so much momentum (both social and financial), yet women's rights like abortion don't seem to have much backing?

I wonder why that is? 🤔

dedicated to bisexual radfems

i'm so happy that we're in this together!

your sexuality is valid.

your attraction to males is valid

your attraction to women is valid

and you have every right to be upset about being stereotyped as a whore- as unfortunate as us bisexuals are labled.

you do not need to change your sexuality for ANYONE.

you have EVERY FUCKING RIGHT TO REJECT WHOEVER YOU WANT!

just because tras say that 'you're biesxual! you are attracted to both sexes that means you'll be attracted to me!' doesn't matter at all. YOU DATE WHO YOU WANT TO DATE!

you absolutely deserve the company of people that respect you for being bisexual. that don't try to force you into the gay or straight role

and you absolutely deserve to be around people that love you for who you are and won't try to change you because of that <3

i love you <3

from one bisexual radfem sister to another

Ways In Which Harry Potter Is Bigoted Trash

Rowling uses names like Cho Chang and Kingsley Shacklebolt for her Characters of Color.

Werewolves are a metaphor for HIV. Fenrir Greyback is a werewolf who likes to infect young children. Seeing as the Aids Crisis primarily affected gay men and there is a stereotype that gay men are sexual predators, this is pretty damning. Especially seeing as she has no visibly queer characters in her story.

Dumbledore is the only confirmed queer character in her story and she kills him off. I suppose Grindelwald was also confirmed as being gay, but that's not the best representation seeing as he was evil. She never explicitly states either of these characters are queer in the text, though.

Dobby wanting to be free is treated as an anomaly amongst the house elves. The rest are content being slaves.

When Hermione creates S.P.E.W. to try to help free the house elves and gets them rights, Ron and Harry both become annoyed with her and Ron outright mocks S.P.E.W.

The book treats any character who is overweight poorly. Typically, heavier characters are either nasty people or incompetent people whom she makes fun of.

The whole thing where the girls can get into the boys' dormitories but the boys can't get into the girls'. You could probably find something transphobic here, especially since JKR is a TERF, but even so, she ignores that through the use of magic, the girls could be just as dangerous as the boys.

She is oftentimes misogynistic, as seen when Mrs. Weasley believes the rumors spread by Rita Skeeter in Witch Weekly and begins to treat Hermione, a fourteen-year-old girl, poorly for them, but treats Harry just the same.

Even characters we are supposed to like, like Hagrid and Ron, make nasty comments about Muggles. And not just the Dursleys. Ron even makes ignorant comments about Muggle doctors, calling them people who "cut people up" and acting like they aren't as good as wizards. Considering they can't just wave a wand and make everything better, what Muggle doctors do is amazing and we all know it.

The goblins are antisemitic caricatures.

Feel free to add onto this if there's any I missed. It's been a long time since I read the series, so there's probably something in there that I've forgotten about.

[The Bi-Monthly, Vol. 3 #3, 1979]

You know I think the suffragettes were right about how we need to ban men from gambling

Like they were about the ban on prostitution and slavery.

Based in Shoreham-by-sea, England master glass worker

Louise V Durham crafts stained glass and driftwood sculptures for the beach and garden

Monstera deliciosa

"is xyz rape, is abc rape" is just the wrong way to approach discussing rape as a feminist. what you're doing when you're concerned about absolute parameters is centering what we should consider allowable by men. why center that. it's not that "everything" is rape, it's that you need to completely shift your paradigm. you need to consider what it means for women to move in a world where their sexual violation is essentially a given and up for negotiation. what does discussing rape actually look like when completely, one hundred percent centering the experiencing and feelings of violated women and completely disregarding what would be helpful for men to think is "only so bad."

The Issue With "True Trans" ♀️♂️

For anyone who doesn't know, "true trans" are conservative-leaning trans-identified folks. They typically claim to know they are not "really" the opposite sex. They are more likely to say they have a mental disorder. They are more likely to call themselves transsexuals. They are more likely to say it's okay they take hormones and got surgery but criticize other trans-identified people for doing so. They do not endorse males in women's spaces. And conservatives typically lap it up. There are many issues with these people, and they are no friend to women and girls.

First, they still uphold misogynistic gender norms. A great example of this is Blaire White, conservatives' favorite trans-identified male. One look at him tells you everything you need to know. The balloon lips, the big fake boobs shown off in every outfit, the valley girl speak, the super long hair that he can't stop flipping while he talks. How is this different from Dylan Mulvaney cosplaying every straight male fantasy of what a woman should look and be like?

Second, similar to conservatives, they do nothing to help women when it comes to other topics that tend to affect women even more than trans activism. In fact, many of them identify as conservative. These include people like Marcus Dib, Blaire White, Caitlyn Jenner, and Jessica Gill. Others, such as Buck Angel, who calls herself "Daddy" and "Tranpa", btw (sorry if you're eating while reading this), claims to be a liberal and simply doesn't advocate for women when it comes to anything else other than being against the more extreme trans ideologists. Rarely if never will you hear these people speak out for reproductive rights or against female poverty, for example. Horrifyingly, Buck Angel worked in porn, on Pornhub, no less, for several years, making herself a fortune, and even when pushed, doubles down and refuses to call out the evils of the sex industry or to admit that porn is misogynistic. In fact, several years ago it came out that a 14-year-old girl named Rose Kalemba had been raped and the video put on YouTube. It took months of her begging Pornhub and then pretending to be an attorney for them to take it down, and in a now-deleted tweet (which survives online), Buck calls her a coward.

Third, they are ingratiating. They want only to be accepted into the conservative fold. They love their place in the limelight as conservative darlings. Again, these are typically conservatives' pet trans-identified folks. Often, conservatives are willing to call them by their preferred pronouns, a consideration not offered to other more liberal/Left-Wing trans-identified people. They uphold misogyny when it's the kind conservatives like. They uphold capitalism. They tend to love Donald Trump.

Please don't let these sheep in wolf's clothing fool you.

This is exactly what I mean.

There isn't an either/or choice that has to be made here. It is entirely possible to criticise that socialisation, explain the risks and strongly encourage women not to partner with men, as well as be there for them if they make that choice anyway, because we're supposed to be feminists and support all women, even if the choices that they make are anti-feminist.

Pretending that me basically saying "let's actually be feminists and remember just how strong a drug female socialisation is, so maybe don't be misogynistic and victim-blame women that get abused" is the same as "never speak against that harmful socialisation" is just ridiculous.

It's reasonable to feel frustrated sometimes when it comes to women still partnering with men, but the rush there is to attack them and blame them for patriarchy grinding them down enough to partner with men despite knowing feminist theory personally sickens me.

And I don't want to hear any version of "but you shouldn't be criticising women when men do..." because if feminists don't keep our house in order and can't even show the basics of compassion over that, the cornerstone of what patriarchy wants, then we may as well roll over and show men the white flag. There's no hope for women if feminists can't even be kind and offer grace to other women.

I love how the concept of female socialisation and patriarchy completely disappears out of the window for some feminists as soon as straight (and some bisexual) women cave into getting into relationships with men.

in case anyone was forgetting what the church was all about

I love how the concept of female socialisation and patriarchy completely disappears out of the window for some feminists as soon as straight (and some bisexual) women cave into getting into relationships with men.

just stumbled into a tiktok of a girl who was talking about her ex boyfriend, how he showed her the porn he’s into and it’s all pregnancy and childbirth fetish, to the point that he has a reddit account he uses just to jerk off to one of the most vulnerable moments of a woman’s life. she said he’s going to college to become an obstetrician.

i hate men i hate men I HATE MEN

.................it's always a mistake to underestimate how much time, effort, money, attention and focus men will dedicate to their perversions. "Nobody would go through the trouble of______________ to creep on women" A man would. A man would go through the trouble. Trust me.

i promise it is not subversive or satirical to be a caricature of what men think of women. they don't get the "joke" you are literally just reinforcing those beliefs

Dear misandrists,

In case you haven't heard it today, you're all hostile, aggressive, psychotic and a threat to men everywhere.