Didn't Pay My Dark Bill So The Power Company Shut My Lights On

louisiana priest in 1807: well since this was a roman catholic territory, we always just designated districts based on the nearest church

louisiana lawmaker: very well. for our new state we shall draw county lines based on their proximity to churches

priest: hang on, if it’s strictly based on the churches, wouldn’t it be arbitrary to call it a county?

lawmaker:

I'd like to remember Pope Francis as the Pope who called a ton of priests faggots, apologized for it, then called them all faggots again

okay so last time i did this you lot sic'ed elvis on me, which sealed my fate in a matter of 4 days

so

if you freaks somehow get this to 30k notes, i will wear my gender bracelets in front of my mother and not try to hide them (she does not know yet)

Apropos of (almost) nothing: I'm the kind of pedant who dislikes calling tentacle porn "tentacle porn" not because I think it's aberrant but because, 98% of the time, what's being depicted are octoform arms or tendrils, not tentacles. Tentacles are defined by the clubbed ends, which are the only part that have suckers. If it's tapered and has suckers all the way down, it's an octoform arm; if it has no suckers at all, it's a tendril.

You're welcome.

Man I love being alive

woke up to a miasma of fog and gloom, pervasive drizzling, and indolent rolls of thunder in the distance

put that old man in a situation