So Long King❤️

every so often i just think about how good it was that the most foolproof one-size-fits-all solution for dealing with basically any horrifyingly evil supernatural monster of the week in the magnus archives was just. burying them in concrete. like yeah i can believe that a few tons of grey brutalist slop would stop the wolfman or pretty much anything in its tracks to be honest. they use that shit on nuclear waste. do you honestly think you're stronger than a nuke? a fucking nuke?

those spice eating contests would go wild. those people who eat blowfish and jellyfish? grapefruits. caffeine!! there's a lot of foods we're technically not supposed to eat but we do it anyways because we're like that

You know how certain tastes allow you to know that you shouldn't eat something, though humans are weird so we do it anyways?

Was thinking how certain foods are bad for animals, like citrus foods

What if aliens' sense of taste indicated things that could kill them

What if to aliens the entire flavor profile we call sour meant poison

What if a human walked up to one of these aliens and took a bite out of a lemon slice without breaking eye contact

Could be a dominance move, a lead into a prank, or just being oblivious that from the aliens' point of view the human was attempting suicide right in front of them when the human is just a weirdo who eats lemons

These are the things I think of when I should be sleeping

Please elaborate on this idea if you want to

Oh my god I was just looking to see how much a copy of Hamlet would be through Barnes and Noble and PEOPLE ARE ROLEPLAYING WARRIOR CATS IN THE REVIEWS??????

I didn't think much of other people before the incident.

Humans are cruel; I am aware of that. Everybody is. Humans are cold, selfish, and prideful. Kids are self-centered and the ego they gain as they grow does them no favors.

Being a tree gives you a lot of time to think. A lot of time to miss the little things you had. I miss the taste of the apples I ate in the morning, miss the feeling of a soft blanket under my hands, miss the way my love's arms would wrap around me while we slept.

I don't know how I'm seeing what is happening around me. Feeling as a tree is very strange. I feel a squirrel running on my branches and the bugs crawling beneath my bark and the ivy winding its leaves around mine. There's so many sensations but also not. I normally feel like I'm asleep, but sometimes I'll wake up and just feel for a long time.

I don't really know where I am or how long it has been. There are sidewalks and people and a lot of dogs, so I think it is some kind of park. The days bleed together - the sky is always cloudy and there's enough street lights around that I can't always tell if it is night time unless I focus. It's peaceful this way, really. I don't know if I miss being human.

I don't know a lot of things these days. My thoughts aren't very clear and it takes a while for anything coherent to really form. I should probably be more worried about this, but that's not something a tree can manage, I guess.

I've learned a lot about people this way. I can feel the emotions behind their words and actions in a way I never had before. Friends have picnics in my shade, kids climb my branches, joggers stop to rest against my trunk. There's so much passion in everything they do. It's incredible, really.

A lady came by one day. She seemed to know that I could hear her? It was pretty lucky that I was awake, honestly, so if I wasn't she would've been talking to nothing. People stared at her weird anyways. I guess talking to random trees isn't normal, huh?

She asked me how I was doing and if I enjoyed my punishment. I didn't really understand; what was I being punished for? what was the punishment? It took a while for me to remember that I wasn't always a tree. I knew I had memories of a before, of a time where I lived as one of the humans, but memories don't work right as a tree. She was surprised. I don't know why. What was she expecting?

She asked if I had learned my lesson. Told me that they had stopped looking for me already... that they didn't care.

I'm the one that didn't care anymore. I am happy this way. No stress, no worries, nothing. Just passive observation and sleep. It was the most peaceful time of my life, I think.

I grew tired and started to lose my grip on hearing and sight, slowing slipping into sleep. the last thing I saw was the woman standing between my roots with a faraway look in her eyes. After that, I never saw her again.

You angered a witch, and in retaliation, she transformed you into an unmovable tree in a public park. Months later, she returns with the sinister hope of reveling in your suffering, only to find that you are not only surviving but thriving and happier than ever before.

'Revenge is bad' to YOU. i love when a character destroys everyone who wronged them. i love when they get to bite and maim and tear and rip and scratch and kill. Sorry ur catholic about it but i'm different

My main quibble about unicorns: have you met horses? If going by the equine sort unicorn? I’ve met both sweet and assholy horses.

Why would you put a dagger on their head.

Horses deserve daggers, horses deserve to kill

TOMORROW IS HALLOWEEN!!!

I suffer from nerve damage and spine problems. I don't have to use any sort of movement aid (yet), but on many days, I prefer to avoid stairs if possible. I've found that splitting from a group is very disheartening, and brings up feelings of guilt.

a certain friend of mine has made it his mission to walk with me every time, whether it be on the stairs (going down or on a good day) or on an elevator. if we're with others, he will ask me if I want him to come with me, and will often follow me no matter what I say about it. it's nice having someone like that, even if I still feel guilty about it.

❗CRIPPLE TIPS❗

✨ Able bodied friends edition ✨

If you are in a group that includes anybody who is using a mobility aid, if you are out and about and a Stairs Situation arises, either ask them which they'd prefer, or opt for the elevator (given your group is small enough. If not, have a couple friends use the elevator with your disabled friend, after asking if this is what they prefer (they may enjoy a moment alone, everybody is an individual with their own preferences). This means they don't lose the emotional "high" of being part of a group, conversation can continue so they won't suddenly feel lonely and excluded on the solo elevator ride, which can creep in and ruin their mood especially if they're new to their disability, and there's less of a chance of confusion once you're at your destination. Nobody likes being lost, but the inherent exhaustion and physical exertion that comes with using and mobility aid is incredibly... Unfun. And distressing! This can be easily avoided and you have the chance to be an Excellent friend! We notice these things!

This post is about being Physically Disabled, Able bodied people are encouraged to reblog, but Do Not Derail-- make your own post if you need to say something not related to being physically disabled.