Sam Smith Saying They're Going To Be Misgendered Til The Day They Die Hit In Such A Deep Way As A Nonbinary

usa? you know that’s not real

i know there’s the joke that as kids we thought that the bermuda triangle and quicksand were way more serious than they actually are but you know what else i thought was a notable danger? whirlpools. i thought they just kind of popped up in the ocean randomly and sucked down giant ships to the bottom of the ocean and it was a big problem.

do you know how many recorded cases there have been of whirlpools sucking down large ships? zero. it’s never fucking happened in real life.

The amount of times I could have been that white girl in the horror movie could honestly be a movie in itself and it’s honestly a waste that my entire life isn’t constantly recorded on film because it would be HILARIOUS

haha im in danger                               ヽ                                     ඞ 

Pronouncing the “E” at the end of “Testosterone” makes it sound like a pasta.

my refrigerator w legs barrels towards me and grabs me and stuffs me into its vegetable drawer then casually walks away

the f in frog stands for friendship

[plunges hand into water, pulls out a live lobster, and answers it like a phone]