Hey Did You Know That You Can’t Escape Fatphobia Even After Death? The Article Talks About How These

“why do you ship them? I thought the ship wasn’t canon?” bro we’re talking about fictional characters, who don’t actually exist in real life, from a media that focuses solely on fictional events that are not real either. so what if these two made-up characters didn’t kiss in their source material? they have lots of nasty gay sex on archive of our own and thousands of novel length slow burn enemies to lovers fics written about them. the fanon content at this point far exceeds the whole canonical franchise. the problem isn’t “it’s not canon” the problem is that you don’t allow yourself to let go of canon and enjoy the wonder of fan contents that are just as good / valid

Today I learned: teeth are actually scales because we a secretly still part fish

I want to see a fanfic where Harry hatches a basilisk.

I want to see a fanfic where he looks up “magical snakes” as soon as he gets to Hogwarts because that thing at the zoo always bugged him, and so the Trio works out that it’s a basilisk immediately after the first petrification in Second Year. But they don’t know how it’s getting around or where it is or anything, so Harry is just like WELP SET A BASILISK TO FIND A BASILISK while Hermione and Ron are like HARRY NO.

I want to see a fanfic where Harry sticks a chicken egg under a toad and makes all these plans about how he’ll talk to his huge deadly snake and get it eye-blinkers and shit so it doesn’t kill people and make sure it’s not too aggressive, and somehow it never occurs to his twelve-year old brain that the chicken egg has a total volume of about four tablespoons and he is not going to get the giant King of Serpents he is expecting.

I want to see a fanfic where it finally breaks out of the shell and Harry finds himself with a bb!basilisk too smol to even have the murder-eyes yet, who can only petrify someone for about half an hour before the effect wears off. She eats spiders and gets tired very easily and demands that he wear a hood she can curl up in and sleep.

(She is also the same vivid green as his eyes and already hideously venomous, but doesn’t like using her fangs because she says they get cold and give her brain freeze when she unsheathes them.)

I just… I really want Harry with a haughty, demanding, arrogant danger noodle who has an overinflated sense of her own importance, views Hedwig as a TERRIFYING MENACE because she isn’t big enough to eat owls yet and keeps up a steady stream of insults hissed in Harry’s ear whenever she’s near someone who has a Dark Mark (which she can sense at close range). And who is basically useless as a familiar because she refuses to slither across anything other than sun-warmed stones or Harry, hasn’t got a very powerful gaze yet and doesn’t like biting people.

(Except snake-arm-people. She finds snake-arm-people confusing and annoying, and would probably make an exception on the no-biting thing where they’re concerned.)

I'm just going to leave this here, because this woman said what I've been trying to articulate for ages much more effectively and succinctly than I've been able to

Maybe it’s a product of being a fan of Naruto for near ten years now and considerably evolving in my perceptions of it, but it’s always strange to see how despite it being near as long since the main series ended, so many people still unabashedly miss the point. Naruto sympathizing with and talk-no-jutsuing almost every villain he comes face-to-face with isn’t an arbitrary thing that Kishimoto employs because he’s an incompetent writer. It’s a narrative device used time and time again to illustrate that there are truly no villains or heroes in this world, only victims who are the product of an exploitative, violent environment funded by the feudal-state system. Even the worst people we come to know in the narrative are a product of that environment and of the cycle of violence that refuses to be broken, so yes, empathy is the point, even for the villains who seemingly belong at the bottom of the barrel. Understanding their circumstances is about understanding the desolate environment that created them and how such an environment should never have existed in the first place. It’s never about excusing them for their actions. Recognizing that ultimately the system is to blame and not the individual people in it is vital to Naruto’s thesis as a whole. We can argue about whether the conclusions and sequels to the main series actually stick the landing with that thesis, but at least for the bulk of the main narrative, it is important and intended for readers to recognize that Naruto’s empathy for others is born out of social intelligence and compassion, not naïveté.

everyone say happy birthday creampuff 🎉🎉

a friend and i are taking her on a drive so she can get some wind under her wings. don't worry we've got her latched on properly so she doesn't fall off. will liveblog how it goes