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He's covering with a kama so we dont get too distracted!

Last Line Challenge

Thanks for the tags @tealmisthams and @ladylucksrogue !

This is from chapter 2 of my newest fic in the Crosslo series, Unbidden:

He’d had panic attacks once or twice before as a cadet, after some particularly… memorable training sessions, but they’d never been so vivid as he’d experienced tonight. 

The first chapter can be found here on ao3 :)

NPTs: @whyamismall, @saviinika, @acatinwinterfell, @ahsokathegray, and anyone else who wants to participate!

When I miss you I just look up to the night sky

It's like poetry...

... it rhymes

Please Don't Make it Real

Summary:

While on Tantiss, Omega provides Crosshair with news he wasn’t expecting to hear. He isn’t ready for it to be real, but unfortunately the reality of life and death waits for no one.

Or, my take on how Crosshair found out about Tech’s death.

Fandom: The Bad Batch

Rating: M

Word Count: 2,535

I feel like a lot of people (myself included) are curious about how Crosshair may have found out about Tech's death. Here is my angsty take on it!

"You Weren't Loyal To Me": How Crosshair's Brothers Absolutely Failed Him in "The Bad Batch" Season 1

I know I'm not the first person to make these arguments, but after recently rewatching "The Bad Batch" Season 1, I feel compelled to play Devil's Advocate and assert that Crosshair's brothers absolutely failed him in Season 1.

Now, don't mistake me. I don't believe Crosshair was 100% in the right. Once he regained his free will -- whether he actually removed his inhibitor chip, or whether his injury on Bracca deactivated it or lessened its impacts -- he definitely should've left the Empire the first chance he had.

I imagine he was trying to make the best of a bad situation, but I don't see why he would stay with an organization hijacked his mind and ordered him to kill his family, civilians and other people who were trying to do the right thing.

But, I don't think his brothers -- I'm excluding Omega because she's a child and was following everyone else's lead -- are 100% in the right either.

I believe Crosshair's brothers basically abandoned him.

CROSSHAIR'S GREAT INSECURITY?

Now, I understand that they didn't initially plan to abandon Crosshair. But, once they knew he was being mind-controlled and especially once they knew how to undo its effects, they never even considered going back for him.

We never see them debate trying to save Crosshair. They don't discuss whether it's feasible, whether it's worth the risk, how they would even attempt it, etc.

I think this was a much-needed moment that we never get to see. In fact, as others have pointed out, we don't really get much discussion about Crosshair at all.

He's their brother. He's been by their side from infancy through their time as cadets through dozens of missions. Why aren't they more upset about him turning against him? Or being mind-controlled by the Empire?

They seem so blasé about it. Like it's more of an inconvenience than a tragedy, especially by 1.12 "Rescue on Ryloth." Like "Ope, Crosshair's here. I bet he's gonna try to kill us again."

As I'll discuss more later, Hunter gets captured on Daro, and Omega loses her frickin' mind. Even Echo, Wrecker and Tech seemed distressed too, even if the show didn't focused on their reactions as much.

But, Crosshair's mind and body get hijacked by the Empire, and nobody seems to give a shit.

No wonder why Crosshair felt so betrayed and said everything he does in 1.15 and 1.16. It probably confirmed something he always felt, or always feared:

That he was the odd man out in his squad -- the last to be included and the first to be excluded.

That they never cared about him as much as he cared about them.

Based on experiences in my own life, with friends and coworkers, I do wonder if Crosshair was always insecure about his standing within the group. This makes sense given that he's likely the youngest of the four original brothers, and that as a sniper, he isn't always in the middle of the action like they are. His personality doesn't really help either, but his brothers seem to be able to navigate it just fine in their "The Clone Wars" Season 7 arc.

Maybe this is partly why he seemed OK with Echo joining the squad at the end of TCW arc: because he felt like Echo would become the new 'odd man' considering that he didn't grow up with the Bad Batch and wouldn't know Crosshair's brothers like he does.

It's been a while since I watched TCW Season 7, so maybe I'm wrong.

But, I definitely think this is partly why he resents Omega so much in Season 1:

The Bad Batch -- mainly Hunter -- decided to risk their lives and their freedom to go back to Kamino for Omega. She might've been their "little sister," but they'd known her all of one day and Hunter still decided it was worth going back for her.

Yet they never went back for him.

Hell, as far as we the audience know, they never even considered it.

I'm not saying it would have been easy or risk-free. They also now have Omega in their care, and trying to extract Crosshair from Imperial custody while all parties involved would be trying to kill or capture them isn't an easy undertaking.

But, as I'll talk about more later, these guys do rescue and extraction missions all the time. They put their lives on the line for complete strangers several times in Season 1 to save them from Imperial custody, slavery, etc.

And I'm not saying they were wrong to do those things. It was objectively good that the Bad Batch saved the people they did.

But, I can absolutely understand why Crosshair would be infuriated that his brothers take on all these missions to help complete strangers but never bother to help him...

ANALYZING THE BATCH'S DECISIONS BASED ON THE SEASON 1 TIMELINE

I understand that, before he confronts them in the hangar in 1.01 "Aftermath," that they were planning to go back for him. And that they were forced to leave him behind because he was literally gunning for them. And -- as far as his brothers knew -- he was doing it of his own free will.

However, in 1.02 "Cut and Run," Omega tells them about the inhibitor chips, implying that that's how Crosshair is being controlled.

Then in 1.03 "The Replacements," we see that Tech is building a device to locate their inhibitor chips, and Omega tries to tell the Batch and specifically emphasizes to Hunter that Crosshair has no control over his actions. Hunter admits that he's angry at himself for leaving Crosshair behind, and Omega reassures him that they'll get him back someday.

So, it seems like -- at least in Omega's eyes -- the Batch was planning to save Crosshair at some point. And, Hunter at minimum feels guilty for leaving Crosshair on Kamino, even though they didn't really have much of a choice at the time.

However, the Batch gets sidetracked in 1.04 and 1.05. First, they need supplies; then bounty hunters are after Omega; then they need intel on who's after her and why.

Then, by the events of 1.07 "Battle Scars," we see that they've fallen into a routine of doing jobs for Cid. It's safe to assume they've done -- or at least attempted -- a dozen jobs for her at this point, based on Wrecker and Omega's 20 orders of Mantell Mix.

And then Rex shows up and tells them point-blank that the clones can't fight the inhibitor chip's effects, re-emphasizing Omega's earlier point that Crosshair had no control over his actions.

The Batch then experiences this firsthand with Wrecker, whose chip activates before they can extract it. We see that, even with Wrecker fighting the chip's effects with all his might, he endangers his brothers and was *this* close to killing Omega, but thankfully Rex stuns him in the nick of time.

Now, we have confirmation based on both Rex and Wrecker's experiences that removing an active chip restores a clone's free will.

Thus, by the end of 1.07 "Battle Scars," the Batch definitively knows:

Crosshair is being controlled by an inhibitor chip and is being forced to do the Empire's bidding;

How to remove an inhibitor chip; and

That removing a clone's active inhibitor chip will restore his free will

And yet, despite all this knowledge, the only effort they make to save Crosshair is to tell him about the inhibitor chip.

They don't attempt or even discuss possibly stunning him on the artillery deck and taking him with them.

But, admittedly, this isn't the best time to attempt a rescue, as they're outnumbered and essentially trapped aboard the Jedi Cruiser. And then Omega gets captured by Cad Bane and Hunter gets shot, and the others are desperately trying to get off Bracca before Crosshair & co. shoot them down. Fine. Getting off Bracca safely and then trying to find Omega should be their priority.

But, once they recover Omega on Bora Vio, and their lives aren't in immediate danger anymore... this would've been the perfect time to at least debate going back for Crosshair.

Again, they have all the information needed at this point.

As for how they find him, well, I'm sure they could get the information somehow. Or they could just cause a stir somewhere so he'd show up to arrest them again, like he did on Bracca.

But, no, they just continue doing jobs for Cid in 1.10-1.13. They don't bring him up at all until they see him on Ryloth in 1.12 "Rescue on Ryloth," and again, the tone is like, "Well, Crosshair is here. That's annoying."

If not being able to locate him was the only reason they didn't try to save him after 1.08/1.09, that argument doesn't apply to 1.12 "Rescue on Ryloth." He's there. They know he's there. They're already there doing an extraction job anyway... why don't they just grab him too???

Yes, there would be additional risks, but YOUR BROTHER HAS BEEN KIDNAPPED BY THE EMPIRE AND FORCED TO DO ITS BIDDING, AND YOU DON'T SEEM TO GIVE A SHIT!!!

Which brings us nicely to:

THE DOUBLE STANDARD

Throughout Season 1, but especially in the latter half, we see The Batch putting themselves in harm's way for complete strangers, or at most, friends-of-friends.

They rescue Muchi the Rancor and other people from enslavers; they extract the former Separatist Senator from Raxus; they extract the Syndullas from Ryloth; they break Gregor out of the Imperial base on Daro.

In the latter three cases, the Batch went to Imperial-occupied planets and an Imperial base, despite all the risks involved. And, especially when they saved Gregor, they had very little information going in and basically just winged the entire thing.

It just feels like, when you look at all these cases, any argument the Batch could make for not saving Crosshair just falls apart.

"We didn't know where he was." He was on Ryloth -- grab him then.

"We didn't have enough information." You didn't on Daro, and you still snuck into a heavily fortified Imperial base to rescue Gregor.

"Everyone there would've been trying to kill us." You literally extract/rescue people from Imperial forces for a living...

"It would've endangered Omega." Well, buddy, have I got a story for you...

You see, when Hunter falls on Daro and gets captured, the Batch still comes to his rescue despite knowing it's a trap AND THEY BRING OMEGA WITH THEM!!!

Every excuse they could've made for not saving Crosshair sooner is gone. The Batch will literally run into a trap for Hunter, and they constantly throw themselves into danger to save Omega, but they never do the same for Crosshair.

It really feels like such a double standard.

They seem to care about everyone BUT him.

Plus, sadly, there's one more parallel I can draw. One more instance where the Bad Batch put themselves in harm's way to save a fellow clone who was being mind-controlled by their enemies in an attempt to kill them...

Echo.

Yes, remember all the way back in TCW Season 7, when we find out that Echo is the one behind the algorithm that's giving the Separatists an advantage in all these battles?

Even though Rex thought Echo was dead, the minute he suspects Echo's still alive, he goes after him. He even punches Crosshair over it, after Crosshair bullies Rex for leaving Echo for dead at the Citadel.

One of the "regs" went back for his brother despite knowing his was being mind-controlled by the enemy and forced to attack them.

Rex, Anakin and the Bad Batch save Echo from a terrible fate. They extract him from the Separatists, restore his free will and essentially give him his life back.

Yet, when the exact same thing happens to one of their own, the Batch don't even consider going back for Crosshair the way Rex went back for Echo -- hell, the way they went in for Echo too, even though they didn't know him!!

SOME CONSIDERATIONS

I will give the Batch this: once Crosshair confronts them on Kamino and Hunter stuns him, Hunter decides not to leave Crosshair behind this time. And that was even after Crosshair refused to say when he had his chip removed. So, for all they know, he might've been acting of his own free will when he tried to kill them on Bracca.

While taking Crosshair with them at the end of 1.15 was a step in the right direction, I don't think it was enough to make up for everything they failed to do.

And, while he doesn't specify exactly what, Hunter later admits to Crosshair in 3.05 "The Return" that he has regrets too. And considering the context and the timeframe they're talking about, it's possible Hunter regrets not going back for Crosshair sooner/at all, among other mistakes he's made. (Story for another time.)

I'll also give some consideration to Wrecker, who was the only one of the brothers who said he actively missed Crosshair in 1.03 "The Replacements." Tech mentions Crosshair very flippantly a few times, and Echo doesn't really mention him at all.

Obviously, we'll never know for certain, but I do wonder how Crosshair would've reacted if his brothers had rescued him and removed his chip at some point. Would he have stayed with them? Would he have wanted to rejoin the Empire voluntarily?

Considering he (supposedly) had his chip removed and still stayed with the Empire willingly in-universe, it's possible he might've wanted to do the same thing in an AU where his brothers rescued him.

He definitely despised that they were fugitives and "scavenging like rats," while he had authority, respect and purpose as a soldier of the Empire.

But, I think a large component -- although not the only one -- of why he stays with the Empire is that he felt like his brothers abandoned him. He brings this up several times in 1.15 and 1.16, and the way he does indicates this is a major sore spot for him.

We see in 1.01 "Aftermath" that the chip enhancement procedure is painful. He scrunches his face, flexes his hand and squirms around in the chamber. Plus, the machine itself looks similar to the Mind Flayer from other "Star Wars" properties.

Crosshair was literally being tortured by the Empire. Maybe he doesn't recall that once the procedure's done, but we see him getting his chip enhanced in both 1.01 and 1.03, and it's possible it was enhanced even more times off-screen.

I cannot stress enough: the Empire basically took Crosshair prisoner, tortured him and hijacked his free will.

And his brothers essentially did nothing to save him.

It would be one thing if his brothers were civilians like you and me, and didn't know the first thing about how to infiltrate an Imperial compound or how to navigate a firefight despite being outnumbered.

But, that doesn't apply to The Bad Batch. That's literally their bread-and-butter.

And Crosshair -- especially once he seems to regain his free will between the Bracca and Ryloth arcs -- watched his brothers risk their lives to save complete strangers while doing nothing for him.

I would've been livid too.

Not to sound like Tech, but while I don't agree with Crosshair's decision, I can understand why he decided to stay on Kamino rather than go with them at the end of 1.16. His brothers offered him no real comfort and no real apology, and I think he desperately wanted to hear that, especially from Hunter.

I know after everything that's happened -- especially Crosshair refusing to say when he had his chip removed -- that it would've been hard to admit their mistakes. But, Crosshair wanted to hear something beyond: "You can come with us if you want. And if you don't, we don't have to be enemies."

The closest thing to comfort any of them offer is Omega affirming that, despite everything, she still cared about him. This seems to be the only thing that really effects him, that causes him to doubt his decision, that causes him to show any kind of emotion beyond anger.

I legitimately believe that if someone had talked to Crosshair one-on-one for like five minutes, and really showed how much they still cared about him and always did, that he would've rejoined them.

Granted, it's really hard to tell.

Crosshair has, as Tech said, always been severe and unyielding. Plus, he really suffers from this "in for a penny, in for a pound" kind of mindset, which is partly why he stays with the Empire for so long even after regaining his free will.

But the fact that all his brothers leave him on Kamino again so effortlessly, so easily is just tragic. No final goodbye. No hug. No nothing.

For all any of them know, this could be the last time they ever see each other. (And, for Tech and Crosshair, it was.)

I know it wouldn't have been easy after everything that's happened, but for crying out loud, I just wanted them to try.

And I imagine Crosshair did too.

IN CONCLUSION

Honestly, I think the TBB writers and producers purposely never gave us a scene of The Batch debating whether to go after Crosshair, or a scene of them outlining to us the audience why it wasn't possible even though they wanted to.

I think the creative team wanted us to sympathize with Crosshair when he says "You weren't loyal to me," while also arguably giving our protagonists a weakness to overcome later.

This really seems like the case if we look at Season 2.

Once the Batch finds out Crosshair's being detained by the Empire's Advanced Science Division in 2.14 "Tipping Point," they immediately start discussing whether and why they should try to save him, even after everything that happened between them in S1.

On top of that, this time they actually decide to do whatever it takes to get him back, despite limited intel and the imminent danger behind such an undertaking.

I think the Batch genuinely learned from their mistakes in Season 1 and, as Hunter maybe alludes to in 3.05 "The Return," regretted not going back for Crosshair sooner/at all after the Empire started controlling him.

I'll admit: I think when I first watched Season 1, I was basically in the Batch's corner. Crosshair was gunning for them at every opportunity, and Omega's well-being quickly became their priority (understandably so).

But, after rewatching Season 1 -- especially now that the show is over and we see how everyone's arcs play out -- it really hits me just how much Crosshair's brothers failed him in Season 1.

Again, I'm not saying Crosshair didn't make mistakes too. He definitely did.

But Crosshair's brothers failed him first.

bringing back my favourite comic that I've made for The Bad Batch 🥲

much much love to the crew and everyone involved!

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Might I pretty please request prompt 40 for rexsoka!!

Ahh thank you for the ask and your patience! I am sorry it took so long to write this. I've added a healthy dose of Rex-centric angst and hurt/comfort for you, so i hope that makes up for the long wait!

This fic is set a couple years after they part at the end of TCW, sometime during when Rex is gathering his forces on Teth.

The fic is a little longer than planned so the full text is below the cut!

Beside You

Kiss Roulette Prompt 40: Impulsive Kiss

Pairing: Rexsoka

Word Count: 1,500

Rex sat up, desperately gasping for air, arms shaking as he trained his pistols on the clone troopers holding the med bay door open. He had to do it. He had to save her. To save them, both of them.

GoodsoldiersfollowordersGoodsoldiersfolloworders-

The blaster shots rang out in his mind, shattering the dream and suddenly he was sitting up on his bunk all over again, gasping for air and training his empty, outstretched arms towards the wall.

Rex wasn’t sure how long he remained frozen in that position. His breathing was ragged and his heart hammered so speedily behind his ribs he was sure it would stop of fatigue. An uncomfortable mixture of terror, guilt and relief ran through his veins, as clear and palpable as it had been on the day Order 66 had come through. 

Trying desperately to control his breathing and calm his rapid heartbeat, he swung his legs over the side of the bunk. The stone floors of the monastery on Teth were cool beneath his feet, but the sensation did nothing to ground him. His breath still came in short, shallow gasps. His hands trembled in his lap. Hands that were covered in the blood of his brothers-

Rex squeezed his eyes shut tight, balling his shaking hands into fists. Wrangling for control of himself once more, he forced his focus to his breath. 

In through the nose, out through the mouth. In, hold for four seconds. Out, hold for four seconds. Repeat. Repeat. Re-

A knock at his door had him drawing in another sharp breath, ruining his methodical pattern and sending his heart rate skyrocketing once more. 

He forced another shaky breath past his lips, screwing his eyes shut tighter and hoping that whomever was at the door would be on their way shortly when he didn’t answer. He couldn’t speak right now. His voice was lost between the panicked, stilted breaths he desperately tried to pull in and out of his chest.

The knock came again, making him wince, but the voice, soft and sweet to his ears, made his heart marginally calmer.

“Rex?” Ahsoka’s voice was muffled through the door. “Are you alright?”

Rex tried to find his voice, but when he opened his mouth the words wouldn’t come. He hoped beyond hope that Ahsoka would leave him in peace, but he worried such a desire would be in vain. 

She’d stood by him, through all of it. He’d nearly killed her, and she’d never once wavered in her faith or support of him. He shuddered, remembering the days after, left with only each other for comfort. The way she’d cried in his arms on that little forgotten farming planet. The way he’d cried in hers. 

He could feel tears behind his eyes now, and attempted to blink them away, but when he opened his eyes he found his breath was stuck in his chest as the horror gripped him anew. His hands were covered in blood. His brothers’ blood. He stood and shook them, backing towards the wall at the other side of the room. 

Suddenly, his foot caught on something, one of his boots perhaps, lined up neatly beside his bunk, and he stumbled, falling hard onto his backside with a thud and a low groan. But all he could think about was his hands. His hands. His brothers were gone, it was his fault myfaultmyfault-

“Rex?”

Startled, he jumped, eyes flicking to Ahsoka standing in his doorway, backlit by the illuminators in the hallway. Something told him she wanted to rush to his side, but she approached him cautiously, kneeling before him. He caught the concerned look on her face before the door snapped shut, leaving them in darkness. He could only just make out her face in the blue glow from the chrono, sitting on the ledge beside his bunk.

“Hey now, it’s okay,” Ahsoka assured him, her voice calm and gentle. She reached out, taking his hand in hers and pulling it so it rested against her chest. “You’re going to be okay, Rex. Just breathe with me.”

He nodded, unable to do anything but breathe and focus on holding back the tears that were clouding the corners of his vision, threatening to spill over.

As Ahsoka instructed him, she took her other hand and carded her fingers through his hair. Or more accurately rubbed her hands against the short, soft strands. Rex briefly cursed himself for cutting his hair short again. He missed the feel of her fingers playing with his curls.

Closing his eyes, Rex leaned into her touch and followed her voice as she continued her quiet, reassuring instruction. Slowly, his breathing evened out, and his heart returned to a more normal rhythm. 

Somehow in the interim, Ahsoka had found her way onto the ground, just behind him, and he was now lying against her chest, his head resting on her shoulder as she continued running her fingers over his hair, and her other hand remaining locked in his. 

Finally, he managed to find his voice.

“Thanks, ‘Soka.”

“You alright? Do you want to talk about it?”

Her voice was so near to his head her lips were nearly at his ear, he reckoned. He shook his head but held his breath, wanting to feel her lips against the side of his head, though he knew it wouldn’t come. It had been too long. Their relationship had changed. Their feelings still ran deep, but after so many years apart, it was different.

He cursed himself for leaving. He missed her so much.

“You can talk to me, you know.” Her nose brushed the side of his head, and he could have sworn she held him a little tighter. He traced circles against the back of her hand, selfishly leaning a little closer. Ahsoka adjusted her position, pressing her cheek to the top of his head.

“Tell me,” she murmured, an open invitation, not an order.

Rex contemplated. The Tribunal. His brothers. The med bay, the chip-

“I can’t right now,” he rasped, shuddering in her arms. “But you know of it.”

His hands shook again. Ahsoka nodded against the top of his head.

“Your brothers?” She guessed correctly. All Rex could do was nod.

“I’m sorry.” She was quiet for a moment. Then, “Rex I… thank you.”

His brow furrowed. He didn’t get it. She was the one comforting him.

“For… what?”

“For choosing to save my life.”

Her voice was quiet and thick. Rex felt his heart twist in his chest as tears clouded his vision once more. He didn’t know what to say. The phrase that came to mind was ‘of course’ but he couldn’t force the words past the tears in his throat. He felt guilty for his actions, but he’d never once regretted saving Ahsoka. It was the hardest thing he’d ever had to do, yet it had been the easiest choice he’d ever made. 

Ahsoka’s fingers left his hair and found their way beneath his chin, turning his head to meet her eyes. He could see her gratitude clear in her blue gaze, and the sorrow in the tears that rolled down her face. Still, he couldn’t find his voice to answer her, to comfort her. 

So, he leaned forward and pressed his lips to hers. She was stiff at first, surprised, but she kissed him back without hesitation. Rex relished in the feeling of her lips on his, moving slowly to savor the moment. 

Wrapping one arm around her waist, he cradled her rear lek with the other hand, pulling her against him and deepening their kiss. Ahsoka responded in kind, melting into his embrace.

When they finally broke apart he pressed their foreheads together, holding her close.

“I’m sorry. I know I shouldn’t have done that-“

“It’s alright, Rex.” Her breath was warm against his lips, and he shivered. “I feel it too.”

Rex nodded and just held her close. After a while, Ahsoka shifted, pressing a gentle kiss to his cheek and then whispering in his ear, “You should sleep. We have quite the day ahead of us.”

“Stay with me,” Rex whispered, ghosting his lips over her montrals, unable to let her go. “I sleep better beside you.”

“I sleep better beside you too,” Ahsoka confessed, nodding and pressing a fleeting kiss to his temple.

Without another word they situated themselves on Rex’s bunk, old habits returning as they fell into a familiar position. 

As Rex tucked her into his arms, settling his chin between his montrals, he pretended like things could go back to how they were before. He pretended that tomorrow morning wouldn’t mean a return to their new commands in the rebellion, he as the leader of his troop of clones, she as Fulcrum. The only thing he did not pretend was that he still loved her. No matter what changed, Rex knew his love for Ahsoka would never fade. He fell into a deep, dreamless sleep with that comforting thought at the forefront of his mind.

Cowboy Cody is trying to seduce you with his eyes