Swingercouple2018 - Fun Couple

Holding You

Holding you. Your body spooned to mine. We are a perfect match to each other. My arm wrapped around your waist… my fingers lightly tracing a design on your soft stomach. I could lay here forever feeling you next to me. My head nestled in your shoulder. The faint scent of your perfume makes me want to pull you closer… make you part of me. Not a few hours ago, it’s scent more present, your perfume was an aphrodisiac for me as the heat of your passion drew me to take you so many ways and then moaning into your throat as I emptied my passion into you.

I want you to sleep… but I can’t put last night out of my mind. Can you feel it? My arousal from our memory is beginning to manifest. I’m feeling myself growing inside you. My fingers continue their gentle dance on your stomach as my crown, aroused by last night’s memory, gently and steadly presses past your moistening lips. Oh god it feels so good growing inside you! Feeling your wetness cover me as I harden completely. What thoughts are in your dreams my sweet? I will fight every instinct I have and remain motionless inside you for as long as I can, but it’s going to be a battle I eventually lose.

You shift slightly… pressing into me. Taking me deeper… the battle is lost. I pull you into me and begin to move inside you. My cock slides slowly… deeper into you. You moan in your sleep… you probably think this is a dream. Enjoying the feel of each vein on my swollen shaft as it succumbs to the spasming of your walls and rubs across your hardened little clit. I can’t help but gasp as I feel the beginning of my end start deep in my ball sack. I’ve woken you and your first words “oh fuck baby,” ring in my ears.

I respond, “Oh god baby take my cum…. Fuck!… All of it!” I can’t pull you any closer… I can’t fuck you any deeper…. I can’t hold back the geyser shooting out of me as your pussy walls grip my spasming cock and your orgasm joins with mine. Your mind’s eye explodes as you feel my cum shooting inside you… my hand squeezing your breast…. my animal noises as I bury my head in your hair and suck your neck. For a timeless moment we are nothing but two bodies feeding off each other’s lust to enhance our own mind numbing pleasure. Our crescendo being me thrusting and holding deep inside you… pumping out the last streams of my cum as you spasm and quiver around my swollen shaft… your body jerking involuntarily and covering me with your own release.

And there we are, a dance of sexual need out of sync with an indecipherable soundtrack of words grunts and moans. Incongruous movements eventually harmonizing as orgasms play out and aftercare takes over. Together… bodies motionless as we began…our breathing synced. I can feel you drift back to the sleep I took you from… I can’t wait to fall asleep… still inside you… still holding you… my last conscious experience the faint smell of your perfume mixed with the scent of our sex.

So you want to talk dirty but you have no clue what to say?

Dirty talk is an awesome way to explore your fantasies in a safe environment, but it can also be a daunting task if you’re not used to expressing your sexuality in such an explicit way.

What do you say? How do you say it? And how do you know he’ll like it?

Diclaimer: the following advice reflects our kinks and likes but the principles can be used for any fantasy you want to talk dirty about. We’re very much into hotwifing both of us. Basically he enjoys to watch me being fucked by a hung guy. He’s not into humiliation or being put down, but he do like to hear that another man can give me just as much pleasure as him, sometimes even more. For me, I enjoy walking that fine line where he’s a mix of horny and jealous. I want him to be horny thinking of me cumming over and over again, but I also love to know that it does sting a little bit when I tell him that a bigger dick can turn me into an obedient little slut and make me cum instantly.

Some safety rules.

First thing first. We don’t want your dirty talk to turn into a stupid argument, so let’s get some safety rules down first.

• Talk about what he like and doesn’t like beforehand. What I’m writing in this post is based on our likes and kinks, and they are not universal guidelines. You should always talk to your husband and find out exactly what it is he would love to hear from you. It’s important to keep this conversation non-sexual, so you get an honest answer, not a horny answer.

• What is said in dirty talk might not reflect real life. This goes both ways. Dirty talk is a great way to explore fantasies and boundaries, but not everything said when you’re raging horny is valid when you’re not. If something is said that surprises you, talk about it after. And remember, you’re going make him REALLY horny, so he might express fantasies or thoughts that is just that - fantasies and thoughts, and not necessarily something he wants to act on. In the same way you need to be clear about how you’re also just exploring your own fantasies as well as his, and might say something in the heat of the moment that you don’t necessarily mean or want to act out in real life.

• This is dirty talk, not a lie detector test. You’re allowed to exaggerate to increase his enjoyment, but I strongly advise you to reveal the truth after he’s had his orgasm so you won’t create a distorted image in his head.

What dirty talking is not

Dirty talking is not overthinking how to phrase the perfect sentence. In fact, once you start articulating your husband’s fantasies, I guarantuee he will be so horny he couldn’t care less how well you phrase it. Just the fact that you’re talking about his fantasies means that he’s too busy trying to keep his orgasm back to even care. Just relax and say something. Anything.

Don’t rush it

The goal with dirty talking is of course to make your husband have an amazing orgasm, but do not rush it!

I’ll dare say that for your husband the process and the talk itself is way more exciting than his orgasm. So take your time and let him  enjoy and simmer in it.

Don’t worry about repeating yourself

You might be thinking “but I already told him that story 3 times, I can’t think of something new”. Don’t worry about that, just tell it again. Trust me.

And now…. Without further ado here are my secret dirty talking methods that’ll make your husband lose his mind.

And then what

I find that the biggest obstacle in dirty talking is how to start it. That first thing you break the ice with. It can feel a bit awkward at first, but you’ll quickly get the hang of it. I’m a big fan of something I call the and then what technique. Basically you just start with a rather innocent question or statement and then evolve into the next natural thing that would happen. So you say something, and then pretend someone asks you “and then what” and then you answer that question.

So let’s pretend for a second you’re on top of your man, riding him cowgirl style and you want to spice it up a little.

Simply starting with a “you like the way I fuck you?” Is enough to break that awkward ice. He’ll answer yes of course. And then what? “then imagine how Mark (using names of actual guys you know works amazingly) would feel if I fucked him like this”

And then what?

“I would bounce up and down his cock just like this. He’ll get to feel how tight your wife’s pussy is”

And then what?

“then I want him to….”

You get it.

Reliving the past

My husband is very much into hearing stories about guys I used to fuck so this one is his favorite type of dirty talk. The way it goes is when I give him a handjob, blowjob or even ride him, I would say something like “you like the way I stroke your dick?” (asking if he likes it is always a great way to break the ice and initiate dirty talk without feeling awkward). This always gets me a very enthustiastic “YES!” to which I answer something like “this is exactly how I used to stroke [name of guy I used to fuck]’s cock…” (pause for dramatic effect) “except… His was a lot bigger than yours”. This line alone is usually enough to almost bring him over the edge, and if not it’s a great way to go into more details - how did it feel to stroke a much bigger dick, would you do it again, perhaps the guy used to get so horny that he would fuck you before you could finish the handjob, etc. Details, details, details, I can’t stress it enough.

Fair warning: not everyone is into hearing about your past! Make sure your husband is into that before springing this on him.

The commentator

This one is super easy because you don’t feel like you’re talking dirty, you’re just saying what’s on your mind. So the way it works is to watch porn with your man and simply make comments about the movie paying. Particularly about the guy and what you like about him. Compliment his dick, go into details about what you like about him, think out loud like “I really wish I could get fucked like that one day” / “look how big his dick is. He would make me cum so fast with that”

If you’ve fucked someone who reminds you of the guy, by all means tell your husband about it. Watching a porn with a guy who’s fucking some girl senseless and hearing your wife drop the bomb that the guy is the exact same size as some dude she dated in college is a sure way to make your husband look at the porn and all he will see is you being fucked right there on the screen. Very hot for both of you.

The yes ladder

This is a really simple but very effective technique that is easy for new dirty talkers and is guarantueed to drive him crazy.

In a nutshell what you do is ask him some questions that all leads to a yes. With each question the intensity in what you’re asking increases. There’s something crazy hot about this almost confessional way of talking dirty and being “forced to admit” your deepest fantasies. This is a great way to get yourself going, and to test out boundaries.

Optional: let him know ahead of time that you’re going to ask him questions and if he says no just once, he don’t get to cum. See what he’s willing to say yes to - just remember these are forced and horny yesses expressing what he likes in the heat of the moment. They don’t necessarily count in real life.

Example of a yes ladder.

“you like this huh”

“would you like it if i did this to another guy?”

“would you let me pick any guy i want?”

“what if i want a guy who’s bigger than you, would you allow that?”

“do you want him to fuck me hard?”

“what if he makes me cum really hard, can you handle that?”

“what if he makes me scream out his name, can you still handle it?”

“can I fuck him right here in our bed?”

“would you allow me to fuck someone I’ve dated before?”

“even if he really knows how to fuck me good?”

“what if I want him to fuck me while you wait in the other room, will you do that?”

You get it, just continue like this. Make the questions increasingly more provocative and test his boundaries, maybe even cross them if you know he can handle it.

The O-bomb

This method works extremely well if you’ve been teasing and playing with him for a while, keeping him right on the edge and he’s SO close now that you can make him cum any second.

All there is to it is asking him “do you want to cum?” he’ll answer yes almost pleading. And that’s when you drop the O-bomb. The O-bomb is some of the blue thought you put into his head and force him to cum to before he can even react.

For example: he just said yes he wants to cum. You then say “good. I want you to cum while you think of me cumming all over (name)’s big dick” and then you simply force him to cum before he even gets a chance to react. As he’s cumming you keep feeding him the thought over and over until he’s done. “yes, cum while you imagine how he makes me scream” etc.

The story

My personal favorite. One thing is to talk about imaginary stuff that could maybe some day happen. Another is to talk about stuff that actually already happened simply by telling him a story about some incredible hot sex you’ve had, either because the circumstances where hot, because the guy knew what he was doing and fucked your brains out or the guy happened to be seriously hung.

This is also super simple for you because you dont have to make anything up, you simply just tell what happened and describe the situation.

Don’t worry about elaborate descriptions or anything. Trust me he’ll ask you to elaborate when he hears something he likes. Just describe what happened and how it felt for you. Especially the “how it felt” part is very important.

The talk

Now in the safety rules i told you to talk about what he likes and dislikes without touching him so his arousal won’t reflect his answers. This time you do the exact opposite. Simply have a conversation about what he likes while slowly touching his dick. There’s something really hot about just talking while casually stroking him. And you’ll be able to measure his response simply by the way his dick throbs, which is incredibly hot.

How to start it: just casually ask him a question about his likes and as he answers you slowly start touching him while asking him more questions.

The close your eyes and imagine

Sometimes it can be a lot easier if your husband can’t see you when you talk dirty.

Example:

“close your eyes. Do you like my hands on. Your dick? Now imagine i was doing this to another guy. Stroking his big dick just like this. I would be so turned on knowing it isn’t you. My pussy would want to feel him inside me. Imagine how he would push me down and fuck me. Imagine how i would gasp when he starts to stretch me. How I would scream when he goes deeper than you.”

Do you see how the above also make use of the and then what technique to tell the next part of the story?

Putting it all together

Now, I know reading about it and actually doing it is two very different things. When you’re first starting out I actually advice you to plan out your dirty talking. This might not be as sexy and spontaneous, but while you’re still getting the hang of it it’s nice to be a little prepared so you don’t run out of things to say. I would also advice you to start off doing it while giving a handjob, as you will have a much easier time focusing on what to say than if you were giving a blowjob or having sex.

Let’s break the ice with an innocent “do you like the way it feels when I stroke your cock?”

When he says yes I would then say something like “good…. Now close your eyes” wait for him to do it.

Then: “would you like it if I did this to another man?” - “yes”

Then: “you know, [name of ex / bull / fantasy guy] used to love when I stroked his dick. Of course his was a lot bigger than yours, I could barely close my hand around it”

Then: “do you like that, thinking about how I used to stroke his big cock?” - “yes”

Then: “having that big cock in my hands always made me feel so tiny and horny”

Then: “do you want me to show you how I used to suck him?” - “yes”. Then put all your effort into giving the best head you have ever given.

Then: “mmh… Can you imagine how good his cock must have felt in my mouth? I used to suck him just like that until he came in my mouth”.

By now he should be getting pretty close, so it’s time put on the finale. Ask him “do you want to cum?” - “yes”. Start stroking him faster.

“tell me…” - make him say that he wants to cum.

“I want you to cum while you think of me getting fucked by [name]. He would always make me cum so hard. Imagine how I used to scream his name” - if you really want to go all out you could start moaning the name of this other guy, whether that’s your bull, an old fling, your husband’s friend or who ever you like to fantasize about.

Do you see how easy it flows from do you like it, to imagine it’s someone else, to describing how you used to do or would do it on someone else?

With time it will come naturally and you won’t have to plan ahead, but to begin with it’s nice to have an idea of how you want to start it, how you want to end it and how you bridge that gap.

There you have it. My secrets to driving your husband wild. Now go… Make him lose it.

Mistresses required undergarments today. Happy she isn’t making me cage my cock today! Good morning!

HOTWIFE TIPS

Unbreakable Rules:

1. HONESTY…NEVER lie about ANYTHING.

2. COMMUNICATE…Listen to his needs, after all your husband is letting you fuck other men, the least you could do is listen to and fulfill his sexual needs. My husband is a big dominate man but SEXUALLY loves to be told what I’m going to do & how he can’t pleased me, little humiliation is in some cases important to the husband ..so guess what ? That’s what I do.

3. NEVER become attached to a lover. DON’T let it happen EVER…FOR ANY REASON. If you do you’re an IDIOT.

4. If you have solo sex(only with his knowledge), return to your husband as soon as you’re finished fucking your stud so that he can have his wife, fresh AND NASTY from her encounter. Be a SLUT !

5.ALWAYS RECONNECT with him immediately after sex with someone else. TRAIN him to want to use you. That way he will encourage you to fuck other men for his satisfaction.

6. ALWAYS Give him respect in ur life

7. SHARE the experience with him. This is for the enhancement of your relationship and for mutually exciting sexual experiences….NOT to make other men feel good. Always make sure your hubby feels INVOLVED and SATISFIED and he will put you on a pedistal and let you be the slut you want to be. If husband not present you must video your time with your stud all the times. Ladies, is very important for your husband to feel satisfied make him go crazy for you. Be the nasty slut he wants you to be.

#savita

Finished my chores. She says I can take my heels off and put my boy clothes on over this and get dinner ready for the kids now

The benefits problems with chastity

If you are into male submission, it isn’t hard to find lists upon lists of the benefits of male chastity. As someone who loves the game of chastity there are some very serious side effects of chastity that some men experience that they don’t tell you about on those lists. Instead of a fun and kinky game, it can get dark and bitter FAST. This happens when chastity is done wrong.

I am here to help. What I say won’t apply to every situation or person. But if you as a keyholder (or someone with a keyholder) isn’t having fun with chastity then this might help you.

But first some highlights of these list of which I speak. Here are some common benefits I found when browsing through a dozen or so such lists (type Chastity Benefits or similar terms in your Tumblr search bar or your favorite search engine)

1. His desire for you will skyrocket 2. His libido doesn’t crash 3. Male masturbation is evil and this stops it 4. He’ll stay faithful to you 5. He’ll be more helpful around the house

etc, etc, etc

This is a sampling but you can easily find more. I will go through each of these examples and explain why I think they are flawed, and how to make it better. But before that I am going to let you in on the basis of every problem with chastity right now. 

IGNORING HIM RUINS EVERYTHING

Yep. If you want chastity to work it means a lot more sex. A LOT more. But it isn’t the traditional type of sex. It is talking and tasks and receptive sex on his part. If as the keyholder (mental or physical keyholder, it makes no difference) chastity is some kind of sexual oubliette where you throw your partner and forget about them then you are begging for problems and pain. The benefits of chastity only happen when you replace what you have taken away from him, with something more enticing than orgasms. And remember, that for most guys, we are biologically wired to do almost anything to cum! Mother nature dedicates whole parts of the brain to sex and desire (for most all people) so you are working with some strong bio-magic. Be aware of what you are getting into. It has the power to raise sexual skyscrapers you didn’t know were possible but it can also ruin and destroy people and relationships. You know the phrase…. “With great power there must also come –  great responsibility”. 

So on to how we make those benefits a reality.

5. This won’t happen with chastity. Period. If you lock up his dick and then expect him to just start doing more house work you are a fool. Taking away a joy in life isn’t going to make someone more helpful. And it is just an abuse of the kinky relationship. Kink is about fun, house work is about necessity; it is everyone’s work. If you don’t think your boy is pulling his share, or would like them to do more, then JUST SAY SOMETHING. It is that simple. You don’t bring kink into. If he doesn’t help when asked, a few grams of steel, or a mental command, isn’t going to change that. And if you don’t feel like asking every time, have a conversation where you explain your needs and wants and then work it out between you. Don’t expect kink to magically fix things if you can’t talk. The same holds true for getting flowers, cards, romantic dinners, etc. OPEN YOUR MOUTH.

Now, how to do it right.

If you are in a D/s relationship, which playing with chastity automatically makes it a D/s game, make it part of the fun. Be explicit about what you expect and why. And tell him often…. more than that…. even more than that… Yes, daily, hourly. You get the idea. And then give him reasons to do more chores that relate to chastity. Trade time out or release for the floor waxed. Or Don’t remember the dishes and it is a ruined orgasm for you. Or You gave up your manhood so now you do a woman’s job. Play with the power he has given you and tailor it to the way the two of you play. Examples?

Your boy into sissification? Great. That little thing has no place being out in the world were it could be mistaken for a man’s cock. Lock that shit up and go get your gurly ass dressed and in the kitchen where gurls belong. (Because dishes are more fun panties and heels.)

Your man’s a pain slut? Sit in a chair behind him with a single tail and give him a lick every sixty seconds until the dishes are done. If he drops one or doesn’t do it to your satisfaction, he starts all over again… with the strokes every thirty seconds. 

Is he a service sub? When you get home, inspect every dish and point out how disappointed your with every mistake you find. Let him feel bad for failing you.

etc, etc, etc.

You get the idea. Whatever your style looks like, use it. But for the sake of all that is kinky, play with it! Don’t ignore it. Don’t make them wait in silence for a someday. Follow through on what you say you are going to do when you say you are going to do it. And if that is more than 48 hours away, your are doing it wrong (more on that in a bit). An inconsistent or forgetful dom is a bad dom. And bad doms make very bad subs.

Oh, and for those that have missed the earlier point on equality but immediately took the role-playing comment (woman’s work) as sexist … go away and quit messing up the fun for everyone else who gets it. Sexism is sexy (for most). That statement means, as an example, that we know that corsets where torturous devices that women were forced to wear at one time. Women died from wearing them! But today we love them because WE DON’T FORCE WOMEN TO WEAR THEM ANY MORE. We have taken the torturous and made it fun. We do that with physical pain. Ever spanked a … SLAVE? We do the same thing with emotionally painful topics. In fact, it is by playing with these outdated ideas, turning them on their heads, and making fun of them that we remove the power they once had to hurt. As I said above, house work is everyone’s work. Kink means that putting a cage on a man and making him do ‘women’s work’ is just fun because it is role-playing, not a forced reality. 

4. If you believe that a small bit of metal and a lock that can be popped off with a screwdriver or small cutters is the only thing keeping a cheating man faithful to you then you are not just a fool, you are an idiot. Sorry to be harsh, but think about it. There are men who will throw away safety, power, wealth and even the lives of themselves and others just to fulfill one of our strong biological urges. If your man isn’t strong enough, or loves you enough, or respects you enough, or isn’t civilized enough to not fuck someone else without the consent and discussion of all parties involved then I promise you that your little cage isn’t going stop him. He is a jerk to start with, don’t play with him. Period.

Now, how to do it right.

Use your words. Make a role-playing game out of it. Talk to him, often (see above) about how you love the power over his orgasms he’s given up, or how you can play with others but as sub he can’t, or how as a sub he hasn’t earned the right to play a top role, or how he’s the bottom bitch now, etc. You know your man and what buttons to push to make him excited. Use it. And use it often. If he isn’t getting to play with his dick then you need to play with his head. And far more often than he ever played with his dick. Whatever you do, help him remember why he made a vow to you and why you are worth the chastity.

3. This is some amazingly anti sex thinking going on there. Listen to sex advice shows or read non-sex positive help books for couples and you will hear the lamination of the women (not being sexist, being Conan) over how awful his masturbation is. He does it many times a day and he doesn’t want to play with me and its like he’s cheating and… and… and… BULLSHIT. Masturbation is something most every higher animal does and most every person does unless there has been trauma. Emotional, physical, cultural or religious trauma but it takes some kind of trauma to make someone give up the benefits of masturbation. Male masturbation is not evil. 

Now I will admit that like any activity, it can be over done or become all consuming. But that is a discussion of addiction and not one of kink. There is a difference. And if you can’t see the difference you need some education on what addiction is.

And I will also admit that there are those that chose masturbation over their partners but this is because of … trauma! If your bed has become so painful to be in, difficult to obtain, tricky to navigate, or he feels to shamed to join you, or random to the point of no longer being a realistic option then yeah, he might rub one out… often. But that isn’t because he prefers it. It is because it is ‘that’ or the relationship ends (going separate ways or it loses what it once was). He has needs that occur at a duration or time that you cannot or will not meet. And he has found a way to meet them that saves your relationship. This isn’t true in every case but it is in more cases than people want to admit. :-(

How to fix this?

Welcome to the reoccurring theme of a fun, positive and kinky replacement. You are locking him up and taking away the right of orgasm. And like anytime someone locks up a natural animal you become responsible for their care and maintenance. You get to control when, AND HOW, he releases. It could be never. In that case, you have to find a suitable replacement that is applied at least as often as what you are taking away (i.e. masturbation… which can be multiple times a day for some guys). This replacement could be submissive acts, kinky words, edging, etc. And then the occasional ruin or miliking or prostate release. Whatever you do, make it fun (even in an evil way) and make it very frequent. And if it doesn’t result in frequent releases (kinky talk, submissive tasks, etc) then it has to be as frequent as his normal masturbation schedule (if not more so).

2. Nope.

This might happen in the first few days as he gets horny as hell. But if you keep ignoring it, keep his sex drive in that sexual oubliette, you know what happens to that powerful, biologically fueled, drive? It changes to something much darker. It could be anger, depression, sadness, rejection, violence, etc. Whatever your man’s dark nature is, being forgotten and ignored will bring it out and bring it out amplified. When you forget him, the best you can hope for is to crush his spirit to the point where he doesn’t care anymore. In any case, you will kill the spark that made you love him in the first place. That darkness will cause the game to come to an end in a miserable failure and might put in place lasting emotional trauma that you can’t fix.

How do you do it right?

DO NOT IGNORE HIM. Don’t forget him. Absence DOES NOT MAKE THE HEART GROW FONDER. Constant teasing and torture and playing and edging and whatever other fun kinky things you do will. If it is done often it WILL make his libido skyrocket and bring out the fun, kinky side of him. He may get super submissive. He may beg. Plead. Claim he’s dying. :-) But he won’t be mad, depressed, violent or feel forgotten. He will feel loved, owned and played with.

1. You know what? This is the same as the last one. Go re-read that again.

In the end, chastity is an awesome game so long as the keyholder (as always, physical or mental) doesn’t take a fire and forget approach, or the ‘absence will make the heart grow fonder so if I forget to play with him one day, two days, a week, two weeks, he’ll really be ready to play when I do finally grace him with the merest crumb of play time’ approach. If you do that, it will backfire spectacularly. 

Chastity can do all those wonderful things the Tumblr blogs say it can. It can make your man feel, and be, much more submissive. He can find a renewed spark in you. He can feel loved, cared for and not shamed for want to play with the person he loved. So long as you don’t ignore your dominant role and don’t forget to play more often than the activity your are replacing (his desire to orgasm) then it will work.

If you want to read some full articles, here are places to start from.

http://flrreding.tumblr.com/post/155699679122/the-following-is-an-insightful-piece-written-by 

https://plasticchastitydevices.tumblr.com/post/170104656799/to-10-benefits-of-male-chastity