Im Nft (not Fucking Tall)

hey bitch, yeah you bitch. you’re valid bitch! slay and shit, yo!

I will always love animals I just saw a picture of a bird I didn’t know existed and teared up bc it was cute and pretty

The red cheeks r so cute

i feel like dentists punish you for your cavities by giving you horse shit fillings :[

Dropped a small potato n started crying how’s everyone else doin tonight

you can only reblog this today

a masterpost of some of my sniper headcanons! just some of my personal thoughts on his character and things he'd like, dislike, hobbies, etc!

while he prefers nonfiction, he also enjoys reading fiction and poetry. he used to read all of his mom's old books cover to cover and there would almost always be a book stashed somewhere outside that he could read between chores (or if/when he had a minute to himself).... thrashed paperback books shoved under hay bales or left to fade in the sun in the back of his old man's truckbed etc...

enjoys old movies and does Not shy away from romances, dramas, etc. he has memories of staying up late with his mom and watching them or listening to radio serials with her. they just Hit The Spot for him and while its maybe not something he'd Openly Admit, he's definitely not ashamed of it!

he loves the ocean. loves to surf, is an incredible swimmer. never really sought the ocean out but once he visited he was like Ohhh I Love This. is fascinated by marine life and learning about it! can hold his breath for a really long time too. sniping/shooting breathing control practice, y'know!

very knowledgeable about medicine. my love for medic/sniper aside, i think it only makes practical sense that he'd have a pretty extensive knowledge of herbs, remedies and medicines that he could easily craft/make/use on himself! he'd also know how to suture and dress wounds. he survived on his own for a long time before medic and his medigun came along, after all!

made money in his youth between jobs at being a pretty good taxidermist. big game hunting was an easy and fun hobby to do and his knowledge and appreciation for animals led him to being interested in the preservation of them. still enjoys doing it now too!

has a surprising(?) lack of knowledge about vehicles. knows where to shoot to sabotage them, but little about the upkeep of his own. knows he should just let engineer look at his van and fix her up, but his home is very personal to him so that is not something that comes easy!

doesn't like asking for help. was raised Not to ask for help, "because you're only as capable as you teach yourself to be". if you do help him, he'll thank you and genuinely mean it, but he won't go out of his way to ask you for assistance unless it's something minor or he's Extremely desperate.

would literally you rather see him naked than have an emotionally-compromising conversation with you. you'll see his whole tacklebox before he tells you how he's really feeling!

despite his stoic/silent nature, he is not very... emotionally mature. has trouble articulating his feelings. this does not mean he's devoid of them by any means! just has trouble getting them out there in a way that would make sense to others. lots of repression lots of internalized things he has to work out... hopefully someday!

enjoys classical, jazz, blues, and country (think Outside of the american genre lmao) music. plays the saxophone along to his cassettes when he has a minute! he has rhythm and is quite good!

he has a collection of kitschy mugs/cups and t-shirts that he'd picked up/somehow just Amassed in his travels... he uses the mugs for planters and other purposes besides drinking, mostly to house the herbs, vegetables and fruits he grows in his van!

installed a rack above the sink in his van that he hooks mugs/planters to and grows his own herbs/veggies/fruits. he does canning, keeps preserves and enjoys keeping his hands busy in a way that's practical and, you know, old habits die hard! he doesn't like to be wasteful.

loves being naked. hates underwear and clothes. if he's in his van he's Probably Naked. loves laying on top of his camper and Basking in the sun totally nude if he can get away with it. infinitely prefers the heat to the cold. he hates the colder bases, but you still won't hear him complain!

no matter how much he "tans", he still has Eternal tanlines from his glasses, glove, watch and hat. the right half of him is a bit more tanned than his left* because of the sun blaring on him when he drives. as someone who does a lot of driving this is just a given to me lol

*i reject the notion that his steering wheel would be on the left side lol. no way he got his van in america... i dont believe that for a second.. i dont Care what the canon model says... s;dlkfsd!

is a very clean person. being a survivalist doesn't allow for poor hygiene! getting dirty on the job is just the reality of it; he doesn't mind, but he'll never turn down a hot shower and a fresh change of clothes! wounds, clothes, and body should always be clean when possible.

likes clutter, hates messes. i don't think he's a hoarder but i enjoy the idea of him hanging on to Some stuff. tries to tell himself that everything he owns has Practical Purpose bc he was raised to believe its not worth keeping if it doesn't, but some things he just Enjoys keeping around!

one of the most flattering things you could do for him would be to make him a home-cooked meal. it isn't a gesture he would take lightly! he'd appreciate it a lot, no matter how good or bad it was. personal things like this go a long way with him!

absolutely Not a lightweight. enjoys having drinks after a long shift at work, but his days of getting sloppy are pretty much behind him. enjoys a couple of beers on a quiet night where he can hang out with his owl and decompress.

loves to grill and cook! baking not so much, but he's still decently savvy at it. used to bake with his mom so it's sometimes still a bit of an emotional sore spot. typically makes jams, jellies, sauces, marinades and whatnot with his preserves for meat he cooks.

greatly enjoys birdwatching and knows a myriad of animal calls. has an old worn beat to shit birdwatching/flora/fauna pocket book that he keeps in his back pocket when he goes Out so that he can mark off species he's seen!

adores horses. loves to ride them, take care of them. can stay on one no matter how much it bucks. also has a soft spot for sheep and chickens, too. i think as someone who lives off of the land he just has great appreciation for everything animals can do for people!

can understand quite a few languages from traveling, but doesn't know how to speak them fluently. he did like surprising spy with some... colorful french after letting the other mercenary think he was an illiterate bushman for a couple months, though!

Thank you mister Strider

Mister Strider what's your opinion on this photo I found on my dad's facebook?

You know what? Fine. It’s been 5 years. Here’s the version you always wanted.