Bart Allen - Blog Posts

Bart: *has a straw in his french fries cup and trying to drink from it*

Tim: What happened to him?

Kon: He learned about Star trek and has been awake for four days to watch the series and all the movies.

Tim:...

Tim: The /whole/ series??

DC groupchats as my favourite Homestuck quotes #2

Thad: Ever hear of Guy Fieri?

Bart: No? I don't think so.

Thad: How unfortunate for you.

Thad: He was an especially degenerate piece of filth.

Thad: He used his connections and guile to wriggle his way into fame, and other positions of power.

Thad: He somehow landed on the U.S. supreme court. Over the years, other Justices started mysteriously disappearing without means to replace them.

Thad: After helping rewrite the constitution to form an incomprehensible patchwork of fascism, theocratic mandates, recipes, and bad rap lyrics, he weaseled his way up the ranks to become the High Captain of Interstellar War.

Thad: I'm going to cut to the chase, cause really this doesn't need to be a full History lesson. Especially with your attention span.

Thad: He eventually came to be regarded as the third and final antichrist.

Thad: No human in history was responsible for as much pain and suffering.

Bart: Is that why REACH attacked our planet? Guy Fieri, High Captain of Interstellar War?

Thad: Yes.

Bart: ;-;

___________________________________________________________

-Kaldur joined the chat-

-Batman joined the chat-

Wally: Mom?

Dick: Mom?

Kaldur: Wait, If you're mom

Kaldur: and IM mom

Kaldur: Then who's flying this plane??

Wally: I change my mind, I want a new mom.

___________________________________________________________

Jay: Hello Tim

Tim: Hey Jay

Tim: How's the best brother in the world doing today?

Jay: Best brother in the world, hmm?

Tim: Of course, who else could I mean?

Jay: What is it you want from me?

Tim: You know what I want, Jay

Jay: Money? Affection? For me to write your essays?

Tim: its all I've ever wanted from you

Tim: *he leans in close to him and gently strokes his face*

Tim: *whispers* I want my fucking coffee back.

DC Groupchats as some of my favourite Homestuck quotes pt. 1

Jason: Hey, I wanna tell a joke.

Tim: ?!?

Dick: Ok?

Jason: What did the kitty cat say to the clown?

Dick: what?

Jason: I'M GOING TO DEVOUR YOUR INTERNAL ORGANS, YOU MURDEROUS SON OF A BITCH.

-Damian has left the chat-

__________________________________________

Bart: Holy Shrap

Kon: yeah

Tim: What?

Bart: so uh I need to borrow apples

Greta: Okay *opens her suit coat and infinite apples pour out*

Cassie: Oh my gods.

Greta: How many do you need?

Bart: 4

Greta: I have them all

Greta: I own all apples

Greta: take as many as you wish

Bart: Incredible

Greta: Isn't it just

Bart: *inhales the apples* fantastic

-Tim has disconnected-

-Kon has disconnected-

____________________________________________

Jay: roy, help

Jay: i broke my fucking caps key

Roy: Whats wrong dude?

Roy: oh

Roy: ha

Roy: youre so calm

Jay: shut the hell up and help me you god damned fruit cup

Roy: hahaha

Roy: its so weird

Roy: youre trying to yell at me

Jay: stop the ass hole antics and help me

Roy: Its like being yelled at by a librarian

____________________________________________

Wally: i mean what are regular towels even made of?

Dick: cotton

Wally: oh shit really, I thought it was wool..

Wally: okay new idea

Dick: Im sure both exist

Wally: make a towel

Dick: alright new idea?

Wally: that you can eat

Dick: what the fuck

Wally: In flavors of bubblegum blue

Wally: and strawberry pink

Wally: boom

Wally: Cotton candy towels

Dick: No???

Wally: yes

Bart and the Batkids

Tim: Bart, you have to stop stealing my siblings.

Bart, leaning on Dick, legs over Jason's lap, getting his nails painted by Steph, getting his hair braided by babs, and showing cute animal pics to Damian: I have no idea what you mean.

Batboys and Bart: Part- Grayson

Okay so now is time for the long rant of Dick and Bart's dynamic. I'd like to state rn before anyone @/s me, I don't ship these two romantically, if anything it's more brotherly companionship than anything.

To start off, Bart would definatly be broken up about Wally's death just as much as Dickie would, and in a weird sense they'd have sort of an understanding. After Wally disapears, Artemis goes off grid so it's not like he can talk to her. Barry is off-limits for obvious reasons. (honestly some things Barry's said in the comics makes me feel like he blames Bart for Wally) More often than not, Bart would go to Bludhaven to talk to Dick and find comfort. Dick was, after all, Wally's best friend. And Bart would give him the same comfort.

Dick had already known Bart, he's seen him hang around the mannor, following behind Tim like a puppy with it's tail wagging. For a long time, he'd thought the two were dating with how close they were. Dick, being the awkard brother that's trying his best to get closer to his siblings would try and get to know his friends better and Bart really enjoyed his company whenever Dick stuck around.

Before Wally's death, Bart would always do anything and everything to make him jealous, upset, or a combination of the two. So every time Dick and Wally were in the same room with him, Bart would use his pick up lines on Dick just to piss Wally off and it worked every time. Dick, of course, knew what was happening because Bart had given him a rushed explination before he started doing that and he found it hilarious how Wally's face matched his hair as he dragged Bart away with the younger speedster yelling out "CALL ME". Tim pinched the bridge of his nose when he learned of this and Jason finds it hilarious as well. Damian, not so much.

Bart would definatly give Dick all the hugs, and Dick- being the touch starved boy he was with brothers who aren't too touchy and neither was Wally- always allowed it. He never really did anything in company but whenever they're having silent time just hanging out Bart would lean up against his shoulder or lean back to back with him. Speedsters are also actual furnaces so it's nice in the winter time. Dick would return the affections by a random hair ruffle in public or a touch to the shoulder to show he was there.

Just Batboys and Bart things

I might as well make this series Bart and the Batboys.

So we all know Bart and his dynamic with Tim, but honestly there's so many possibilities. Hi, if you're new here, I rant a lot about how Bart and Jason would get along wonderfully.

Anyways, Bart and Damian. So we all know Bart, once he dies, for some reason always comes back younger. (That reason is probably cause DC creators only see him as comedic relief and keeping him young keeps his spark but I'll leave that for another time). So eventually, When he comes back from death as Impulse, same age as Damian, after previously being as old as Tim (which is just weird), we have a blooming friendship.

Now obviously, Damian- bless him- is our snobby little prince with serious attatchment issues and good sense of humor. I feel like Bart would bring out a totally different side of him tho. We all know About Damian and Colin, or Damian and Jon, but Bart is just different from them.

As I've stated in my JayBart rants, Bart and Damian would definatly hold that sort of mutual understanding of what it's like to die and come back.

But other than being a total prankster and fun loving kid, Bart has his moments when he's got this off-shore wise part of him that has great advice. (such baby) I feel like Damian trying to shed away his teachings from the LOA and trying to fit into his newfound clusterheck of a family would be really hard for him. Obviously Bart knows a thing or two about that, seeing as him and his own family didn't get along either and they had no idea he existed until he showed up one day too, so Damian would see this side of Bart whenever he gives the Robin advice or just talks that no one else really sees and thats just so... hgggn

Also, Bart would definatly try to teach Damian how to have fun and invite him to tag or hide and seek and only get Damian to play when he says it can help in tacticality and training. He'd be very patient the entire time with him, and ends up having fun anyways. (Accidently breaks more than a few vases in the manor durring tag, oops)

Bart is also basically immune to rude comments since he's just too aloof to either notice them or care. (Legit, joker calls him an "obnoxious, fleet-footer, super brat" and all Bart does is think for a moment and say "no I'm not") Anything Damian throws at him he'll laugh along too. Also, 90% sure Bart would get Damian to smile a lot when people aren't around and he calls it a win.

Since Bart was trained in combat by Timmy and the LAPD and he has superspeed reaction time, he's a great spar partner for Damain. Dami uses him mostly for hand-to-hand or vent sparring and Bart is completely okay with this. His reflexs to all the punches and kicks are perfect for a moving target and keeping the fight going for longer.

There's a lot more I can say on this but I'll end it here. Y'all are probably like "Who's gonna read this long heckin thing" and I'm wondering the same.

Pff

Jason and Bart's dynamic is literally just

"Someone will die."

"Of fun!"

That's it. That's all they are.

SO

I was listening to my BOPPIN playlist today, as I usually do, and a thought occured to me while listening to one. Those of u that know me know I'm a very weak gay, and also stan for many homosexual ships cause I'm mr lonely, ANYWAY

I was listening to Youth, by Troye Sivan, and my brain was like "Hey"

I was like "What?"

It was like "Wanna know who we think this song goes perfect for?"

and I was like "Oh no"

AKSJDNLKMLAKSL "ITS BARTUARDO"

IM NOT WRONG JUST LISTEN LIKE

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ICAD01dKJmw

Hi, and welcome to my Ted Talk.

Today on top 10 underappreciated relationships in DC

Bart Allen and Rose Wilson

They need more recognition cause this-

This is the content we deserve

REEEEEEEEEEEEE

OK i WANNA ADOPT THE BART PROSTHETIC LEG HEADCANON REAL QUICK

Y a l l, do you REALLY THINK that a gun shot wound of THIS CALIBER^ THAT C L O S E

Would have A N Y salvagable parts left of his knee??? LIke Speedsters heal fast but they don't grow back L I M B S. It shows the doctors doing surgrey and everything but in my mind it's like "WHAT KNEE, THERE'S NOTHING LEFT"

Do you KnOw how powerful that gun is?? I mean- you may not but IT'S PRETTY HECKIN STRONG

Listen. 100%, if Bart did get a prosthetic leg, like hell he's telling his team. This is Bart "I'm gonna bottle up all my emotions and then one day I'll die" Allen we're talking about. He's probably scared to tell anyone in case they think it'll cause problems and kick him off the team or something. Plus, he loves being pampered but he hates pity.

inaccurate Batfam quotes #36

Dick: You little shit.

Jason: They just like me better!

Dick: Right, and how much did you have to blackmail them to believe that you little gremlin.

Bruce: What's going on here?

Dick: Jason stole one of my best friends and Ex girlfriend!

Jason: I plead the fifth! Can't steal what you never had!

Dick: Why you-

Bruce: Dick, maybe consider that they do like Jason for his... personality.

Jason: Why you gotta say it like that?

Dick: This is ridiculous. *storms off all dramatically*

Bruce: Maybe for future reference, don't steal any of Dick's friends.

Jason: Fine, I won't steal any more of Dick's best friends. Yeesh.

[One week later]

Jason: *casually sitting on a seat enjoying hot cocoa*

Tim: *slams the door open* YOU BITCH!

Jason: *smirking* Hi, Timmy.

Tim: DoN'T Hi TiMmY mE, YoU tOoK BaRt FrOm Me hOw CoUlD yOU!

Bruce: Jason, this isn't what I meant when I said don't steal any more of Dick's friends.

Jason: You should have specified.

Jason and Bart tropes #4

Jason obviously has things he's ashamed of, even though he's this ass-kicking God we all love, he still has his demons. One of those demons being certain scars. Ever Hero, vigilante, and Villain has those certain scars that they don't want people to see or know of. For Jason, it's the ones from the Laz pit and when he died. He hates them, wishes he could get rid of them, but they're a part of him.

Bart has scars of his own, one's he wishes to never show. That being, all of them. He shows people his outter shell, this fun, party loving speedster that's always quick with a joke. In reality he hides most his pain behind that mask because no one expects the outgoing one to be the most damaged, but that's just what he is. Damaged. So damaged he fears peoples reactions to his real self and became his character "impulse". The scars from the future, from being enslaved and tortured, from fighting back and losing so much. He hardly looks at himself because of them. He may be quick to heal but the scars run deep.

Jason and Bart find a mutual understanding in not wanting to share the scars stories and be complacent in showing them, but not showing off. It's better that way.

Jason and Bart tropes #3

Jason doesn't like metas or people with abnormal capabilities too much because they rely on their powers, but Bart doesn't.

Bart grew up in virtual reality, being constantly experimented on and watched by scientist assholes without his knowledge. He also grew up in the Apocalypse, or what was considered one. So he knew what it was like to be completely powerless and live normal, or as normal as you can get in a back-water, end of the world, totalitarianism planet. Even when he was rescued by his mom and Iris plus sent back in time to keep him safe, he was trained by all of LAPD and Tim Drake in combat, on the chance that he lost his speed again. It came in handy later on when he did lose his speed in the battle against the Rouges and his clone, Thad. And then his mentor Max Mercury taught him to slow things down and live in the present, that not everything is about speed and how fast you can do something, but how well you do it. So as you can assume, Bart is always alert. Probably why he's so jumpy. He never knows what to expect and thus he expects everything, cause with his powers he's able to predict every possible outcome in a situation. He also uses it to his advantage and He's memorized the complete human nervous system (talk about Crash).

That's probably why Jason likes him so much; even with his powers, Bart expects to be jumped any moment. (Likes in headcanon, of course, but c'mon you can't tell me he wouldn't)

Bart Allen takes up about 90% of my thoughts so here’s another thing

The first time Bart heard he had a Twin Clone he was thrilled to have a brother, completely disregarding what side Thad took. After all, Owen- his half brother- was kinda a villain and they sorta got along. Why couldn't he and Thad get along? When they finally did meet he found out just how false that statement was. It was like looking into A distorted mirror from one of those circus tents. Same face, same height, same suit- minus the colours. Thad's face was strewn in annoyance and boredom, his hair a blond like Barry's and cut shorter than Bart's. Bart felt so happy that he wanted to run up and hug him but Thad was the first to react, lunging foreward into an attack. The entire time they fought, Bart only blocked and tried starting up small talk. He noticed Thad was a little slower than he was, but he didn't really care. Thad continued his onslaught of punches and kicks, not answering to a single word Bart said. He grew increasigly frustrated with every blocked attempt and He jumped back, Bart just standing there watching him.

"Why aren't you fighting back!" he growls

"Because you're my brother." Bart said it so simply, like it was the easiest thing in the world.

Thad has no idea how to respond to that. He's always quick to comment but to that he had nothing to say. He decides to run. Bart doesn't follow. When Thad returns to the lab and Craydal asks him about the confrontation and why he was back so soon, He simply replies "That was just to gather data on his fighting technique". He refuses to admit he felt anything for the brat he was raised and trained to annihalate, who put him in pain just by being better than him. He refused to admit that when he heard "brother" that he felt a single way about it.

Gender didn’t exist in the future: Bart is Pansexual and likes to wear skirts (maybe gender-fluid)

you can't change my mind

Okay but hear me out

Bart has perfect photographic memory, which means he remembers everything he hears, sees or reads exactly how it was. So, technically, if he were to read language translation books, he'd be able to understand every language. Pronounciation would be hard for him sure, but he could understand and write in any language if he had enough focus to read the scripts. I'm not crazy, he totally could be a human translator for everything. He'd be every language teachers favourite.

Brief explanation of all of Bart’s deaths.

Hi, back by unpopular demand, ME! (Updated this cause Bart has died YET AGAIN in the timespan of this post and now, also I forgot one. So yes, Bart has died a total of five times now.💀) this is Jaybart rantpost part 2.

So, as I said in the last post, I'd explain Bart's three (Now 5) separate deaths. So without further ado, lets get on with angst!

Smallsville sacrifice: Bart actually ends up sacrificing himself for Clark Kents sake and many more in Smallsville, Giving up his speed to the Black Flash or the "grim reaper" of the speedforce. Nasty lookin guy, all black and withered. Hard to miss. He gives up his speed since his is the only one that's "pure" as Reaper Flash says, afterwards being struck by a Zeus load of lightning. After the light died down, the only thing left was a lightning bolt insignia on the ground where Bart stood. His last words were "smell ya later." (Have I mentioned how much I love him?)

Thad Thawne and the rouges: (I love Thad and I need you to understand that he's not entirely at fault for his actions, no thad hate under this roof.) Anyway, Thad was able to convince, with much bargaining, the Rouges to aid his defeating of his Twin Clone, Bart. Bart looked much older, and had taken the name Flash after everyone else "mysteriously" lost their speed and Wally was gone. So a plan was made, a fight took place, Bart was defeated and later on the Rouges weren't too thrilled about it. Just read the comic, I promise it's great. Right after he died Wally returned as Flash and soon Bart was ressurected but as a teenager again?? And then he took back his title Impulse. Don't ask.

Killed Clone: Okay, so this one is a little bit different from those cause he does technically die, but it's not by normal conventional means so let me explain. Bart has many powers that are unique from the speedforce like his speed sympathy; the ability to feel when another person in the speedforce is in trouble. One of these powers is his speed scouts. He can draw energy from the speedforce to duplicate himself with multiple carbon copies, like Naruto. Anyway, all of them are connected. If one thinks, that thought is communicated between all of them. If one is hurt, they all feel it. So after he was using them in a battle, one of his speed scouts was killed, right in front of him. He was able to feel them die, and feel himself dying even though his pain was falsified and the shock sent him into a coma that later on killed him. After he was ressurected... again, he swore to never use his speed scouts again.

White Flash: In an end-of-the-world scenerio, Barry Allen has to face the speedforce and try to speed his way to save the planet, but he wasn't fast enough. (A common reoccurring theme in Flash comics) so mama speed sent Bart as her massiah to deliver them victory. I'll share with you a quote cause it's better at explaining this than I am: “Grandpa! No time to explain. I can feel it... feel the speedforce all around me... feel it in me... now that I’ve caught up with you, I can Help. This is what I’m meant to do— it’s not enough, what you’re doing now. You’re going to need every bit you can get... every bit that’s in this weird reality... the speedforce sent me around the universe... I collected it for you... took it from Max, Wally, Jay, everyone..! I’ve come through time and space and this universe to become the speedforce’s ultamate messenger, so I could tell you this: run, grandpa. Run and save our world.” Basically he gives up all his speed and the others, sacrificing himself (AGAIN) for the greater good so that Barry might have a chance in saving their time. He turns into the White Flash right before his molecules were torn apart and he ceases, now one with the speedforce.

(SPOILERS FOR FLASH: FUTURE STATE): Bart, Max, and Barry were all looking for ways to bring Wally back from being basically possessed by Famine- yes, the one from the four horsemen. He was apparently inprisoned in the speedforce and took away all the others speed. They found a way to save him, but it was guarded by villains. Bart uses the prisma goggles and gadgets he stole. He rode into the room on a rainbow- try telling me that's not gay. you Can't. Anywho, he stole it from the calculator man, who then shot him with a laser seconds before Max electricuted him. Sad day to have to explain such a badass character was killed by someone named calculator man. At least it wasn't calendar man...

I want more Bart Allen and Jason Todd tropes

Okay, listen, because this is like hella important:

Jason Todd dies when he's still a young robin, he gets yeeted into the dirty regen bath and returns with a vengence that just hits different

Bart Allen dies as Impulse, Flash, and Kid Flash (I'll explain those in a bit) and comes back then continues to pretend like nothing happened, cause he doesn't wanna talk about it. He never does, that's just him.

So These two are already like peas in a pod-ish, but I feel like they'd have this amazing dynamic.

Bart likes to talk a lot, Jay is pretty sassy and quick to comment but not too talkative, so I feel like they'd have good discussions. Plus, Jay loves liturature and Bart is a stickler for facts about lit and science. They'd have plenty of intellectual conversations.

Jason would see past Bart's persona facade pretty easy, Bart feels more comfortable around him cause they've been through similar stuff and it takes a while but they help each other open up.

Bart would be a great outsider. He's a time anomaly, angsty speedster with way too much internalised pain from all his experiences. (Yj really didn't do him justice, pun intended) Also, he's a great drawer.

I have so much more but Im running out of rant energy rn so I'll continue in another post sometime.

Bart’s time in the future

Okay, so let me get this all straight for those of you who don't know comic Bart or at all: Bart Allen's dad was gone and his mom couldn't take care of him constantly being on the run, so he was basically a lab rat for a scientific facility since... b i r t h just about. He was put into VR as a sort of sedative and to keep up with his vastily progressive mind and body since he aged about 200x the average person. (By the time he was three he looked 13) But in a way, speedsters have this kinda "dog years" effect in that everything in the world for them is slowed because that's just the way they see everything. So, in technicallity, while the scientists only had him for three or four years, to Bart it was 16??? And don't get me stArTed on the physical and pshycological effect of that. He never saw another living person until he was 16. He never had any kind of physical contact until he was 16. Could you even imagine?? No wonder the kid is so touch starved. (I feel like him and Kon bond over the fact they're younger than their bodies progression but besides the point). So he's been in this facility for 16 years, spends all that time in a Virtual false reality where his only friend was some weird VR program named Dox, which is probably symbolysim for the doctors that experimented on him when he was put under, and which he named his dog after, he's never felt affection or talked to people outside of that, never got a chance to meet his parents, has more villain relatives then Hero and STILL didn't go to the dark side after THAT?? Can still show off the best fake smiles and persona front after all that?? Had to endure more than MOST EVERYONE in only THREE YEARS which was actually SIXTEEN and STILL is GOOD?? You cannot tell me that this is the bravest kid you've ever read about, you cannot. And even with all that, he finds it in himself to forgive many of those who've wronged him. Listen, Bart Allen is by far the most amazing character I know and you can fight me on this. He's been through more than all the Batfam COMBINED. If he wasn't so bright and cheery, I bet Bruce would've adopted him. (another thing I forgot to mention, the fact Wally practically gave Bart away to Max and made the kid feel unwanted, even though Max became like the only crutch Bart had/a father figure, not even Barry wanted him when he returned from the dead. Assholes) He's died FIVE TIMES and he's still a hero. He's experienced this over and over, and still is a hero. He left his home and practically erased it's existence so now he's a time anomaly, who doesn't really fit in anywhere in time, and is still a hero. Fuck your favourite angst characters, Bart Allen takes all the cake.

Crossover? Flashfam and Batfam

#Bruce meets his match

Bruce: *staring at Bart from across the interrogation table*

Bart: *Kicking his legs and staring back*

Bruce: So, Impulse-

Bart: No.

Bruce: No?

Bart: You were gonna question me. I say no.

Bruce: You didn't hear the question.

Bart: Okay, go ahead.

Bruce: So-

Bart: No.

Bruce: *disgruntled bat noises*

Bart: *staring with a blank expression*

~ two hours later ~

Bruce: *dangling Bart upside down from the ceiling*

Bart: And then I was all like, "No way, you can't do that. That's a no-no, even in my book", and then Tim was like "I-"

Bruce: Enough, please stop. Stop talking. Leave. I'm done.

Bart: *phases out of the ties* thanks. *walks out*

Diana, on the other side of the one sided glass: I've never seen him give up so quickly.

Hal: Kids' got spunk.

Clark: We should go before Bruce tries to vent on one of us.

inaccurate Flashfam quotes #7

Bart: Barry, I like boys. And I'm in love with Ed!

Barry: *confused about confrontation* Okay, I'm glad you told me, Bart.

Wally: ooo, about that...

Barry: wait- what?

Wally: There's a reason I've been hanging out with Dick more often.

Barry: ...

Barry: Do any of you kids like girls?

Jenni: I do.

Barry: *tired sigh*

Hal "glowstick" Jordan: Is this a good time to tell the kids?

inaccurate Flashfam quotes #6

Bart: HAHAHAHAHHAAH YOU ALL SAID IT COULDN'T BE DONE BUT LOOK WHO'S LAUGHING NOW!!!!!

Max: What's the kid on about?

Wally: Bart made a theory that he could use Chicken Whizzees as his lightning rod.

Barry: sighs heavily and it worked...

Bart: On a table laughing hysterically with a bag of Chicken whizzees in each hand THE FUTURE IS FOOD!!!

inaccurate Core Four quotes #4

Tim: It costs 400 dollars to go see a therapist but it costs 0 to tell yourself "It be like that sometimes"

Kon, softly: Wha- No. Are you okay?

Cassie: Aren't you rich?

Bart: But, what if I start taxing you every time you say that?

Tim: Do you wanna die, Bart?

Bart: This is an economy, Tim. Nothing you do is free.

Cassie: Bart, who taught you that?

Bart, shrugging: I read it in a book somewhere.

Kon: uhm...

Cassie: Tim, you're literally rich, just pay for therapy.

Tim: No.

Bart: Why not?

Tim: Cause eat the rich.

Tim: Also student debt.

Bart: You're gonna eat somebody??

Kon: Bart, remember when we talked about metaphores?

Bart: That makes a lot more sense.

Cassie: You all need therapy.

Kon: And you don't?

Cassie: I punch things. That's theraputic.

Bart: What's therapy?

Kon: ...

Cassie: ...

Tim: ...

Cassie: Tim-

Tim, dialing Black Canary's number: Already on it.

Kon: Are you telling me you've never talked about your problems to anyone?

Bart: Why would I? problems are meant to be solved by yourself as a self discovering journy and bottled up emotions.

Kon: where'd you learn that?

Bart: Steven Universe.

Cassie: Guys, can we focus please?

Tim: She's on her way.

Bart: Who's on her way?

Cassie, wrapping a blanket around Barts shoulders: Shhh, we're gonna take care of you now.

Bart: But I'm fine-

Tim: There there, speed demon. You're in good hands.

Bart: ... sniffs thank you.

Kon: nods approvingly

inaccurate Core Four quotes #3

Tim: I'm at that age where I have only one thing on my mind.

Bart: Your massive crush on Kon?

Cassie: Student Debt?

Tim: holding a birdarang Homicide.

Tim: I'm about to stab someone.

Bart: Please don't.

Cassie: slowly takes the weapon

inaccurate Core Four quotes #1

[in the Queer Muskateers groupchat]

Bart: sends a tiktok of a duck in a bathtub

Bart: Oh sh*t it's 3 AM

Bart: My bad

Tim: That's adorable

Bart: GO TO BED

Should I start a Core Disaster/Core Four headcanon series like my Batfam and Flash fam ones?

The answer is yes. Yes I should.

inaccurate Flashfam quotes #5

the adventures of people figuring out that all the Flash's are kleptos

Hal: Barry, we need to have a talk.

Barry: What about?

Hal: It's about the blankets.

Barry: The... blankets?

Hal: Every time you come over for a movie night and use one of my blankets, they always disapear.

Barry: ...

Hal: ...?

Barry: sniffs they're just so comfy...

...

Dick: knocks on Wally's door excessivly

Wally: opens it Hey Dickie. What's up?

Dick: Where are they?

Wally: I'm not kidding this time when I say I have no idea what you're talking about.

Dick: The hats, Wally. My hats. Where are they?

Wally: ... sighs and points to a drawr

...

Tim: ...

Bart: ...

Tim, staring at his sweatshirt: Bart-

Bart: OwO??

Tim: literally cannot say no ... You know what? Keep it.

Inaccurate FlashFam quotes #4

Bart in Reach: What if I became a superhero?

Bart: Jk jk...

Bart, also leading a revolt against the function: Unless?

Inaccurate Flashfam quotes #3

Bart: speeding into the house and locking himself in his room

Wally, utterly confused: knocks Bart, you okay in there?

Bart, nervously: Hahaha, yea! Totally! Whywouldn'tIbe?

Loud bang from inside

Bart: screeching

Tim, crawling from the air duct: WHERE'S MY CHICKEN NUGETS?!

Inaccurate Flashfam quotes #2

Bart Allen: Okay, this is it. I'm battling a Evil supervillain trying to kill me and probably my worstest enemy.

Bart's mind: Make casual conversation and playful banter the entire time.

Bart:

Bart: Let's do it.