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Shitheads exist.
I can thank them, since I get to be a major brain engager after having to repeatedly navigate their torrid little worlds, and get out the other side in one piece. In hilarious paradox, it is usually shitheads that are not in one piece, they are often split personalities, Jekyll and Hyde types who are in one moment giving hugs and happiness, and in the next punching you in the face because “your face makes me want to”.
Resting means re-finding and remaining in what never changes, which is essentially who you are inside, despite any hurt, pain, and suffering. Despite any of the low self esteem brought on by being in shitty company with deeply imbalanced, disrespectful interactions. Despite being told that you are anything else but who you are, who you are never changes and in resting there is always a safe, welcoming home.
Shitheads do not have such a home. They see other peoples homes, envy them, and seek to either occupy them fully, or destroy them completely - one of those is impossible, and the other only temporary, like a bad tenant, the type that leaves their trash behind and does not take care of what helps shelter it from the worlds trials and tribulations.
By resting, left behind trash can be cleared through and recognised as something that never belonged to us to begin with. There is zero responsibility, nor obligation to keep that trash in safe storage, so in whatever way that trash is turfed out of your beautiful home matters not, but you can bet it will matter 100% to the owner and they will not enjoy it’s appearance back into their lives.
Put the shit back where it belongs, with it’s shithead owner.
Sending love :) <3
In my recent article about narcissistic trait lists, there was a demonstration of a tool that I find handy when trying to filter overly narcissistic people from those who are less damaging to my life, and the lives of others.
This tool is something that I call The Skeleton, which put simply, describes the basic framework in which the vast majority narcissistic of people operate, based on my own observations.
Parts of the skeleton have deeper meanings and interconnections that I said that I would write about, so here it is, my narcissistic Skeleton breakdown post.
Intense Staring
Unless they have been the victim of serious abuse and are not yet repaired, almost everybody has some sort of psychological Personal Boundary in place. This is even so for those who are particularly vulnerable, although that boundary is often not swiftly recognised as something that is being violated when it is. Intense staring is the eye on the target, looking for what those boundaries may be and in creepier but true terms, is the activity of the obsessive, early Reptilian Brain nature of the person in question out on display.
The Triune Brain model explains things a little more, and is handy to know about for a basic understanding of diverse human behaviour, not just in history but also where we are now.
Inferiority and Superiority Imbalance
Superiority is Inferiority in disguise. If someone is cutting about as the be all and end all of a situation and it is not just tied to a genuine job role or achievement, then you have a guaranteed picture of the persons inner reality which is an exceptionally low self esteem. Super painful feelings of absolute inferiority spring from continual low self esteem states, which is the breeding ground for superiority, the fake, deluded self that is created in order to get by.
Lies and Dishonesty
Lies and Dishonesty section can be attributed to delusion. Pathological Liar can be mentioned here, a term also known as Mythomania. The firm belief in one’s own lies point to a kind of self hypnosis, otherwise known as delusion, and when reality does not match up with held delusions, Stupified Eye Response and Facial Expression are the common, transient, yet often repetitive result.
Unreciprocated Use of People
Narcissists only give when it suits them, and in many cases the giving will be unbalanced and played on as a more sentimental act rather than any healthy, truly valuable or balanced way of giving. You can bet your whole ass that any sort of giving done by the narcissistic person will absolutely be conditional or on a give to receive basis, and the condition will become apparent if remaining in quiet awareness about this.
There is a saying out there which I have found to be both the tool of people who mean well and think that they are saying the “right” thing, and a tool of the narcissist, which is: “If you are looking for it you will find it”. Well guess what fuckers, I am looking for it, and if I find it, you can skedaddle.
Stupified Eye Response and Facial Expression
The main highlight of this feature is easily explained by psychology, and if you click through the link you will find out what Cognitive Dissonance is. Skip back to the original issue under Lies and Dishonesty and you may be able to connect the dots and figure this one out for yourself. What cognitive dissonance does is expose one’s utter delusion of themselves, to themselves, creating the look of stupification that some of us know all too well.
Well that’s it, that is the final breakdown of my personal Skeleton tool, a diagnostic tool that I created for myself that others may find helpful too. If you have any questions about it feel free to ask.
I have been dealing with, observing, listening to, and navigating narcissistic and psychopathic persons for almost my entire life. This is part of the result, and I give thanks every one of them for their valuable input.
Stay brilliant :)
© Monday 14th Feb 2022
Not always.
It is a mistaken judgement to say that those who came from troubled parentage and backgrounds, where attachment to caregivers and parents might have been lacking, are those who become narcissists.
There are many people around the globe who come from troubled backgrounds yet are the most empathetic, caring, loving people that can be met, and I think that to tarnish everybody from a poor background is a marker of not only extremism, but unprofessional-ism in their field.
Take those growing up in poor circumstances, not every child from the same household will always be produced in the same way. They are each unique individuals who will learn in their own ways within the environment that they find themselves in, they are not one person, and not an extension of the caregivers or parents that they have been landed with.
Some do indeed come out as narcissists, even psychopaths, that is the way of the world, but there are also many vastly empathic, over caring, over responsible people that come from such backgrounds who have been highly tuned and trained to feed narcissistic needs. I am one of them (recovered).
The last thing that people who come from troubled backgrounds need to hear, is that they have been tarnished with the same brush as their abusers, that they are narcissists because of an abusive childhood. The very act of doing this is an abusive one itself, one that I understand is called discrimination.