Spilling Lines - Blog Posts

my writing from when I was tripping acid on halloween. it's not much, but most of my trip was just smiling and listening to Electric Guest

Starlight

Sometimes the stars remind me How lonely I can really be With skies length greater Than arms reach to me But twinkle, twinkle starlight This lonely child of night Next time you're feeling dark Remember even the moon shines at night Crescent state of mind With silent lips of mine Let go of that fear, my dear It's time for you to shine

You will never find peace in me When you long for the touch of someone else’s Fingers slipping and sliding throughout your veins Riding on the tides that turned

Washed out, my eyes be closed Since whenever you stopped looking at me the same And there’s no one to blame But myself for misguided actions Like kissing scars and running with wolves With the moon on my mind I fake my breaking smile Sweet mistake, stay a while

Slipping cigarettes Slipping in and out of time With nothing but a one track mind Watching all my thoughts unwind While I fall more and more behind

Every day seems to get a little more rough A little more tough With calloused knees and broken dreams What I offer just isn’t enough

To make a break To keep from breaking my spirit Pushing past my limits Spilling lines and spitting lyrics I’ve just got to make it one more day Just think of one more way To make things right and make it far See my name in lights like a shining star

Midnight Green

Feeling loose watching you seduce Covering fifty shades of green as my eyes drift off-screen Off the air as I slip into a dream scape. Escaping from the person I once met I once knew you in a different light The moon was first shining so bright in the middle of the night Reflecting over the still lake hiding our skeletons in the deep Cause we flood empty lakes with dead bodies and tweaks And twerps that hate from the other side of the street

Our friends all sit by the handmade bonfire While you play me like static on a wire Static on the TV, watch and see Me rising up and then tumbling down Well, that’s part of the process Just don’t ask me questions I can’t possibly confess Because you know the answer so why make me the weasel Of this reality that feels so surreal, it’s too much evil You’re asking me to spill. I know you’re smarter than you appear And I’m waiting for your skeletons to tell me your biggest fear While I lie in front of many with my hand full of drink As my mind begins to stretch and shrink Telling me you know what’s for the best When you struggle on your own and I’m struggling Watch you count your stacks, start hustling Because we’re all in the same game, but on different levels Dealing with the same Hell but different devils

Friendly Fire

It’s running on three o’clock and I’m running out of gas While you finish your run getting fresh grass Let’s heat it up this time Burn that fucker while I spit this rhyme Spilling lines in my black and blue book Next to you while I watch that green cook Split it, rip it, pass it, zip it up then sell that shit There’s just one confession I must admit I’ve got a home in the dark and a boy that sparks My love like a bonfire heart Watch us tear this world apart Our generation was doomed from the start And none of that matters because the family here that can inspire A love that will spread like wildfire Weaving through the tangled trees That makes stained lungs cough and your breath heave Inhaling in the seductive air Without any worries, without a single care Because I’ve got my best man by my side With sweet, salty breeze coming from outside And I’ve got my friends that I call my family to keep me cozy inside We’ll watch the sun set and rise in the same sitting There’s no way this is the life to think about quitting In fact, to this special one, I’d rather be committing My soul to the man of my dreams Because when I look in his eyes I see the sun gleam Down on my heart while this bonfire love starts And pass that blunt you roll like it’s a fine art

Rusty Blinds

It’s understandable, you see I broke your trust in me When we first met, engaged were we But now I guess is your chance to get back at me You chose to hide, you lied The trust is dust The life I live has turned to rust

Maybe I just drove you crazy Drive myself right off the bridge Off the grid to render my sins Just do not ask the price I pay I must live with my quiet rage The silence screams of tortured tongues Careful to open with words too heavily broken I chase the wind in hopes to find The ghosts creeping all through my mind That run wild and wish me dead Will I ever get out of my head?

Lately

Sometimes it's hard to tell who keeps secrets Because lately my spirit weakens While we all wait in darkening dumps Behind a facade of witty and trippy smiles But when was the last time you actually smiled? Like when we had to stop by that corner coffee shop even just long enough to say hello Back then we had each other, and what we have now I don't know The past lingers long enough to whisper sweet thoughts of Summer Come to pass with Winter's cold and heavy hand Beaches breeze and Georgia heat will come again in a year But we can never go back to the way we had. But we can never go back.

How can I write when my eyes see more than what's really there I thought I was stronger but I didn't know my heart was this bare When you can only stay up and keep nothing down Your body screams but misguided thoughts control the crown Reality is nothing but chemical levels and wavelengths To test your will and lack of strength Cheeks in blush that secretly flush out your will to stay alive Purple and blue never looked so cruel on calloused and bruised fingers Tasks that once were simple now make you tremble unless you pull the trigger Of that crystal pistol And watch days blur into one, until the final end when you look in the mirror Of a picture you haven’t seen in forever this clear Small shifts in appearance like sunken cheeks and vacant eyes Try to tell yourself it’s a better disguise

Can’t seem to sleep and too tired to weep At seven in the afternoon, half gone all along Watching with envy while I skip the rip on your bong Even if I could, my mouth can barely open With so many words that are still left unspoken

Manic Mantra

What’s that Hungry Ghost in your head saying now? To let it all out, to scream and shout In silence and on beaten paper with colours of expression And perception Of sight that’s just right outside your comfort zone You could have never known how much I’ve grown Until I look deep in the crowd with understanding shown

Running away and cheating the price to pay Was always easy when I didn’t want to stay Because I’d rather be chasing the millions of spectrums And open doors in every dimension To the venom in my crystal veins fleeting so stray From the clusterfuck of an array Of bright lights and hushed sounds To lucent colours and wavelengths that surround You and I forever bound.

Lights and Sounds

Feeling amped Let's take it back to camp I'll show you what's it's all about Hip bones jutting out Don't forget to scream and shout About it. Don't you know how I feel Because this is reality but it's not real You know I'm a big deal One day I'll go far See my name in lights like a shining star It's wearing off, I'm wearing thin Let's just hope I keep my real skin

Feels

It’s hard knowing what to feel Because nothing ever seems real But this sinking feeling Held up by a thin string That’s roped around my neck so tight When all I want is to pack up and take flight Down South for the winter This cold is too bitter

I’d rather see myself in golden California Smoking a cigarette filled with marijuana But that’s what got me in this mess So it’s time to put this to the test Just don’t ask the price I paid I must live with my quiet rage With standards so low, my day was just made Saved a bee drowning in my drink I want to fly but all I do is sink You can’t sting my flesh You’re kind of pain would leave me feeling refreshed

To think where I’d be without love Even when I always think I’m not enough Things aren’t perfect, but you’ve put me in limbo It’s better than hell, better than suicide, so Where do we go from here? I’m spilling lines that aren’t ever clear.

Spilling Lines

You don't understand, but you should. You're silent, but I need to hear your screams Over mine Calling and stalling while you hold your breath You don't feel it. Feeling static like a ball with no kicker Or a clock with no ticker Spilling lines, feeling down all the time Up your dosage, up your chances Of making me sick to see your face You don't understand, but you should Understand that you're sucking the energy right out of my hands From my grasp you hide the tethered emotions. Notions that someday soon things will come to an end.