Fic Where Steve And Robin Show Up At Eddie’s Door Smelling Like Vomit And Starcourt Fire Like, “You

*hits jeremike with the funger beam*

Island Retreat

Some JL members get stranded on an island.

Marvel: “I caught couple rats and a rabbit.” *holding the rats by their tails and the rabbit by its legs*

GA: “Ooh nice. I got a deer. Can I have a rat or two? They taste like stringy chicken.”

Marvel: “Sure!”

WW: “I brought back a bear.” *points behind her to a bear*

GA and Marvel: “Woah, Wondy you’re the best!”

The reason Marvel didn’t get anything bigger was because as Billy, he’s used to catching rats and pidgins so he stuck to what he was used to. GA just was just hunting, and Wonder is just Wonder. Now, of course as Marvel, he could’ve catch bigger things. This was utilized when Arthur, Diana, and him made a challenge of hunting and ran around trying to hunt the most. Diana won with a warthog, three deer, a rabbit, and a snake.

So, here’s the squad: Marvel, Green Arrow, Wonder Woman, and Aquaman.

They turned this into a vacation guys. They’re playing beach ball with a makeshift ball. They’re using the radio they’re supposed to be using to radio for help, for music. They’re chilling.

Aquaman: *stops paying attention to their beach ball game and doesn’t even notice as it smacks into his head as he’s looking to the water*

GA: “Dude…? Why’d you throw our game? Now we’re behind those two.” *looks to where Arthur’s looking*

Marvel and WW: *also look over to the water*

*silence*

Dolphin: *suddenly pops up out of nowhere tugging a crate with him*

Aquaman: “Oh my god…” *rushes over*

GA, Marvel, WW: *confused*

Aquaman: *opens crate* “Alcohol!”

All of them were later chilling on the beach, drinking cocktails of their choices…

GA: “The is the life…”

Aquaman: *Agreed. It’s nice to have a couple days away from Atlantis and being a hero. Speaking of which, Cap, I’m honestly surprised you’re so chill about this.”

Marvel: “Whatcha mean?”

GA: “Dude, you never take breaks.”

Marvel: “Wha? Of course I do.”

WW: “Brother, the other day I heard Bruce discussing with Clark about the fact that out of the six years you’ve been on the team, you’ve never once asked for some kind of leave.”

GA: “Wait really??”

Marvel: *silence* “I don’t see how it’s a bad thing.”

Aquaman: “It is a bad thing, pal. That’s not normal. You don’t have any family you need to visit or spend time with?”

Marvel: “No, not really. Junior and Mary are in the hero bizz so we spend a lot of time together already. Then, as for you guys, I see you almost every day since I go to the Watchtower a lot.”

GA: *gasp* “You consider us family?” *sounds touched*

Marvel: “Yes? Is that bad?” *sounds self conscious*

Aquaman: “Not at all. I for one am happy to be apart of your family.” *sounds proud*

WW: “As am I. I’m happy we’re siblings, brother.”

When the four were finally found, they got scolded by Bats and Supes.

Batman and Supes: *standing side by side*

Batman: *bat-glaring them all*

Supes: “What is wrong with you?! You can’t just shipwreck and then not contact us! Why didn’t you use the emergency radio?!”

GA: “There was an emergency radio?”

Supes: “Yes!”

Marvel: *whispers to Arthur in Atlantean* “Is he talking about the radio we used to play music?”

Aquaman: *whispers back in Atlantean* “I think so.”

Supes: “What’re you two saying?”

Marvel and Aquaman: *simultaneously, and in English* “Nothing.”

Supes: *starts ranting again*

WW: *whispers in Greek* “What were you guys saying?”

Marvel: *also switches to Greek* “The radio. We think it was the one we used to play music.”

Supes: “Guys! I can still hear you!”

Marvel: “Sorry Mr. Superman.”

WW: “Apologies, Clark.”

Supes: *starts ranting again*

GA: *in Italian* “What were you guys talking about?”

Marvel: *in Italian* “Remember the radio? We think that was the SOS radio.”

Supes: “GUYS. Stop whispering in languages we don’t understand—”

Batman: “I understood two out of those three.”

Supes: “—In languages I don’t understand!” *looks to Bruce*

Batman: “They weren’t using the SOS radio to signal for help.”

Aquaman: “We were using it for music.”

GA: “Arthur! You snitch!”

Aquaman: “What? They were gonna find out anyways.”

Supes: “Why were you guys playing music???”

WW: “We had what one would call a vacay.”

Supes: *takes a deep breath* “Okay. Marvel, go sit over there.” *points to a couple feet away from the other three*

Marvel: “What? Why?”

Supes: “Because you speak to many languages! Now go.”

Marvel: *pitifully walks over there*

Supes: “Now, back to what I was saying.” *starts ranting again*

Y’ever read something and have understanding that has eluded you interminably suddenly stop, curl up, and snuggle neatly into a fold in your brain because a new way way opened to it?

Tucks in back pocket for future use

How to Paint Light by jonhuangart

I honestly find this hilarious since captain marvel is a grown man in this for and is like 6 or 8ft tall doing activities meant for bugs bunny or something. And he’s doing it in front of other JL members and the general public, while fight literal villains. He’s a menace and I love him, also pic for reference.

The Way Marvel Fights

He fights goofily I think. But here’s the thing. On one hand he’ll drop an anvil on you Looney Tunes style, but on the other, he can actually fight. Like actually. And the thing is he switches between goofy fighting and actual fighting mid battle, so you never know what you’re gonna get.

Like, he was fighting with the JL one day, because all of a sudden, aliens descend from whatever planet to take over the Earth, which is a pretty common occurrence by this point. Let me set the scene, Marvel conjured up some bowling pins and is smacking aliens upside the head with them, all the while juggling them like he was a circus act. He was even humming the circus tune. Then, out of nowhere, he just drops all the pins, runs up to an alien and punches it in the throat. Completely unmotivated too. This alien was doing the same thing as the other aliens. Nothing set it apart from the other ones. Then he went right back to the bowling pins like nothing happened. Like Clark didn’t just watch him render that alien the ability to never speak again.

Then, another time, he was hopping on a pogo stick he magicked up. He was using it in this strange way that allowed him to slam into Black Adam from different directions. Now, rightfully so, Teth was annoyed at the Champion for not taking the fight seriously. He was even more annoyed a “grown man” was using a children’s toy as if he himself were a child. He was about to tell the Champion to take the fight seriously when suddenly Marvel hopped close to him, then got off the pogo stick before grabbing the it, winding it back, and smacking the fuck out of Adam. The man felt his brain shake, and if you’re wondering how the pogo didn’t bend, it’s Billy actually made it out of his magic. Then, just like with the aliens, Marvel went right back to doing what he did before.

Then, there was this time he was fighting Captain Nazi. Marvel was throwing magicked up plates like ninja stars at the other man. It was a small an annoyance to the him, not enough to do major damage, but enough to leave small cuts. Then, Marvel ran out of plates and Captain Nazi blinked and sewer lid was just flying at him. Straight for his head by the way. He caught it, but wow, he felt that in his bones. His hand was shaking for the rest of the fight and he later found out that him catching it, mildly fractured a couple bones in his hand. And guess what? Just like the other two fights, he went back to what he was doing before. As if that definitely wouldn’t have most likely landed the Nazi in a coma if he had gotten hit by the thing.

Something that I think is important about Wyatt as a character is how he highlights the stupidity of the district system. I know that the human love of sorting ourselves into categories meant that every YA series for a while had a bunch of different groups with associated traits that tweens could take uquizzes about, but The Hunger Games isn't like Divergent or Harry Potter where young adults get grouped based on their personalities. Sure, the districts all have industries they're known for and the tributes are clearly shaped by wherever they grew up, but being born into District Four doesn't actually mean that you'll like fish. Wyatt is brilliant when it comes to numbers, but in District Twelve he can only channel that into gambling. Imagine if he'd been born into District Three with a father like Beetee, what he could have done with his mathematical talents. There's mention of it with Maysilee too, how she doesn't want to run the candy store but her options are that or the mines.

I guess what I'm saying is that the district system is great for keeping people oppressed because they see their fellows as "other," which is why it is a tool of fascism and not a practical way to run a society. It doesn't matter who is in what group, it matters that they internalize their group identity to the point that they ignore the similarities between them.

Reblogging for that luck

How to spot signs and symptoms of Breast Cancer 

How to Marvelously piss off a Bat: A Guide by Billy Batson, Pt 1

Bruce: Hint at anything and everything prophetic, alternate futures or timelines where something goes horribly wrong. The sheer amount of stress will piss him off, weather its true or not.

Ex:

Billy: Well, this could be worse…

Batman: Superman is flinging himself into buildings high on fear gas, how does this get any worse chum?

Billy: Well hes not murdering his wife or lasering my eyes out right now so we’re definitely in the better timeline

Bruce: he’s not What now

Dick: Midair super-speed pokes. The slightest jab at the side, ankle, or even knuckle mid leap or drive freaks him out and leaves him fumbling a lot.

Ex:

Nightwing, happily summersaulting off buildings preparing to grapple to another mid flip: It’s a bird, its a plane, its the Lord Gray-

Captain Marvel, gaining righteous revenge for his bowl of marshmallow only lucky charms: (Pokes the back of his right knee) bop

Nightwing, now clutching his right knee 57 stories up: so-IIIIIEEEEEE

Jason: Stick a plunger on that crome dome of a helmet, bonus anger points if its during a meeting or in front of people he’s trying to intimidate

Ex:

The Red Hood, scourge of Gothams criminal underworld, in a meeting with his lieutenants: Next thing on our agenda-

The Red Hood, now with 3 plungers stuck to his helmet: We- what the hell

The Hoodlum from the warehouse rafters: THATS WHAT YOU GET FOR SELLING ME OUT TO BATMAN JERK FACE!!!

Hood, taking a plunger off and pointing it at Hoodlum: I KNOW 17 WAYS TO KILL YOU WITH THIS THING YOU LITTLE SHIT, SO YOU’VE GOT 17 SECONDS TO RUN!!

Tim: Mutter something sounding like a vague hex within his proximity, he’ll think you cursed him if he knows you’re petty enough. Basically a magical non-magical psych out

Ex:

Tim, very tired: I am not helping you beat Damians score on Cheese Viking Billy, that goblin will know you cheated and then its my head on the same stick as yours.

Billy, muttering under his breath while walking away: oi karpoí tou kópou sou na xekinísoun sto stóma sou (may the fruits of your labor sour in your mouth)

Tim, understanding the Greek and that billy has ties to Greek gods and magic: *panik*

@thefantasmarex