Shiftuu - Shiftuu

Posting faggot and queer like 2am gunshots to keep property values on my blog low and scare away assimilationist LGBTs who want to replace my empty lot full of native wildflowers with a 5-over-1 because they're too traumatized by their upbringing to accept the reality of our diverse marginalized community

Sazed: hello, I am secretly part of a tradition that our theocratic despot has gone to great lengths over the past thousand years to completely annihilate. I'd like to talk to you about our lord and savior, Literally Anyone Else

Having ADHD to me is spending so much time avoiding feeling bad instead of feeling good

Like sure I can work under pressure, and that pressure involves getting homework in on time to avoid a negative consequence, forcing myself to go to class to avoid that negative consequence, making myself go to work so I get paid which I need to live, trying really hard to not fuck up in group settings so I don't feel guilty, doing household chores because I have to-

But I rarely get actual senses of accomplishment from any of it

Because it's all baseline stuff I have to do to avoid feeling bad. I get a sense of relief, maybe, but not the actual good/yay/charge from it that apparently others do

I only get that from what I call extra credit stuff, which are things I want to do like creative/fun things, or exceeding expectations in something like I worked ahead or something turned out really well

Which obviously isn't all the time

So i plod along most of the time just doing what I literally have to and then I STILL ask myself to do more so I don't feel like a failure/empty/like I did something I personally got a kickback from and not just oh, yeah, perfect grades are my expectation so I don't feel Proud I'm just relieved it isn't bad

Anyway. I don't know what to do about it/maybe I can get my brain to release some kinda Good Job chemicals for things that aren't just extra credit/fun to me but. Cries

© pet_foolery

promise me you won't forget objectum moonpaw. promise me even when the book comes out and shes a pale grey cat with blue eyes and a generic older male love interest you won't forget her.

we have to make moonpaw x moonpool canon in all of our rewrites everyone.

weird anti ideology finally leaking out into the mainstream

IG: ousíapoeticaok

Senates adjourned until may 7th on a tuesday.

Get to calling through the weekend and monday.

We can clutch this!