Techtitee3 - Untitled

why does wiggly sword exist? What are they good for?

Skill: Shows off the blacksmiths massive horse cock. In a time before modern machinery some crazy Germans and Swiss hammered beyond natural human limit. They probably did it as a meme then realised it was actually useful as a weapon. Sharpening a wavy blade would have been a nightmare.

Functional: Good for duelling sword vs sword. A traditional sword allows you to slide off an enemies blade if your swords clash, because the blade is straight. The waves in a flamberg blade creates vibrations which hurts the opponents hands, that doesn’t sound like much but it gives you an advantage. Very useful for parrying since the enemies sword will strike, then the blade gets stuck on your wavy blade or they pull away from the impact shock. Either way you will have an opening to attack. Also the waves cut much deeper similar to a serrated knife. If you got cut once by this blade, you would not be able to stitch your wound shut, you are pretty much sliced bread.Aesthetic: Someone challenges you to a duel, while they unsheathe their boring longsword, you unwrap your wiggly sword. They immediately apologize and run because you are rich enough to afford a wiggly sword and probably have multiple wenches giving you ankle parchments.

Azama: Sometimes I feel bad about being a piece of shit... But then I remember our existences are temporary and meaningless!

Ok this will sound kind of dumb but... Sneezing headcanons for the guys? I imagine Ryoma's being the loudest and coming out of NOWHERE

Hoshido:

Ryoma - Yep, he totally has the most explosive sneezes, rivaling Corrin’s draconic roar. And he’s like totally calm about it afterwards, too, like Kagero and Saizo will just stare at him in shock after he knocks down 18 pots and 4 kids and goes back to life like nothing happened.

Takumi - He sneezes like a kitten, just a little “choo!” sound. You’re gonna want to hug him after he sneezes. He’s gonna want to deck you when you try.

Saizo - We don’t know if he sneezes or not. It’s just his eye closing for a bit and reopening, which most people assume to be a sneeze, but he could just be blinking.

Azama - Very proper sneezes. Polite, not too loud, always covers his mouth with his elbow, never spits while sneezing. Except when he’s alone. Then he lets loose. Only Setsuna has ever seen this happen.

Hinata - He’s got this shouting sneeze, like you’ll think some Faceless just stabbed him but turns out he just stopped to smell some flowers and now needs to shout to the heavens.

Subaki - He’s got a creeping sneeze, like he’ll feel the tickle of a sneeze and try his hardest to ignore it, only sneezing when he’s alone because he’s SO self-conscious of his sneeze.

Hayato - He tries to make his sneezes loud and manly like Ryoma’s but he just sneezes like a tiny animal. He and Takumi often talk about their sneezing troubles and practice making their sneezes more aggressive.

Kaden - He’s a messy sneezer. Like, he sprays so run away from him while you can. (also, provide a tissue to your local foxes when they sneeze, they usually will need one)

Yukimura - He’s got a really boring, mundane sneeze. Like, it’s a simple “acho”, his head dropping slightly and his eyes just blink once. SO boring.

Nohr:

Xander - When he sneezes, a dozen shingles fall off of the roofs of the castle. The floor actually rumbles.

Leo - He’s got a really strange sneeze. He says the “ah-choo” but a really loud “ah” and a wee little “choo” so it’s more like AAAAHHHH-choo!

Laslow - He’s got really bad allergies, so he tenses his whole body up for the sneeze, rearing his head back and tucking his shoulders up before letting loose and sneezing so hard, he hunches his back and jumps a little.

Odin - He gets those sneezes where he thinks he’s going to sneeze ALL DAY but it never comes out until he’s in like an important meeting with Leo and Niles and he just explodes.

Niles - His sneezes sound more like he’s having an orgasm. “aaahhhhh oooohhhh choooooooo” They just kinda devolve into moans.

Arthur - Okay so this dweeb always tries to suppress his sneezes because he’s afraid of spraying everywhere but he usually ends up choking every time he does that and ends up coughing and hacking and honestly it’s more trouble than it’s worth but he keeps pushing them down because he doesn’t want to inconvenience anyone.

Benny - He pretty much roars when he sneezes and instantly looks around to see if he’s scared anyone away, apology forming on his tongue within seconds.

Keaton - He’s got a revisiting sneeze. Like no, once was not enough, he keeps going twice, thrice, four times, his record is 27 (in his defense, he got some soap up his nose when that happened).

Gunter - Many often hope he won’t sneeze again because he’s got that old man sneeze, he starts hacking and coughing and you always contemplate performing the heimlich on him.

Neutral:

Jakob - It’s the most polite sneeze in the army, like he whips out a handkerchief, covers his nose and mouth oh so delicately, and lets out a simple “ah-choo”.

Silas - His sneezes aren’t particularly loud per se, but they have force, like he’ll blow papers around, and afterwards look around proudly to see if anyone saw how far he launched the map you were just studying.

Kaze - His sneezes start out normal and unimpressive enough, but his “choo” is really long for like no reason whatsoever.

Shura - He always sneezes in pairs, like it’s always two, never a single sneeze, never more than two, and he always goes “bless me” afterwards.

Izana - Honestly all I can say is ????? Like his sneezes go a little like this… ahem. “aaaaaaaiiIIIEEEE CHEEEEE!”

Fuga - He’s got this really father-like sneeze, you know the one. The one that comes out of nowhere and makes everyone’s head snap to him wondering who just got trampled and yelped like a cat on steroids.

Nohrian (to either Azama or Mitama): I could kill you if I wanted to! Azama: So? So could almost any member of my army. So could a bear. So could a determined duck. You're not special.

was ringing up a customer and added his coupons, he was surprised it took off so much off the total and i accidentally said “well tits the season!” instead of tis the season but he let out a very long and powerful “Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeell yeah”

I paired up my Azama and Henry and apparently the world is ready for a match made in hell