2025-04-13 - Blog Posts

I'm standing in the parking lot after talking to the service employee that will repair my car. I look around, it's a small parking lot with maybe 30-40 cars in it and most of them are new. All those cars worth maybe 20 million SEK( around 1.8 million Euros). Service employee told me the visible damage will cost me minimum 50000 SEK(around 4500 Euros). It's big enough to upset me but I felt more upset when I realized a half full parking lot in the middle of Sweden that wouldn't even look like a dot on map, this tiny place no one can see on earth is worth 400 times more than my headache. I felt so small, like an ant that was stepped on. No one hears you scream or cry, no one even realizes you are there and hurt. You expect at least a second look but no one looked at you even before they stepped on you. Money is just a tool for me, I'm happy as long as I have enough of it. I have never been greedy and have never had any big financial ambitions. I come from a very poor background so even having a car is luxury for me comparing to where I have been 10 years ago. But feeling this small hurts me. I should go back to my old self before I got used to this comfort. However I took myself out of that shitty life, I should work that hard again to take myself further for my peace of mind. It should be at a place where this amount of money won't upset me anymore... Look at the beauty of the water... You can see in the picture how silent, how peaceful it is there. Check out all the shades of blue and enjoy the ease settles in your mind.