Advice - Blog Posts

WHY DID I NOT FIND THIS YEARS AGO!?!? Also, if, in the days before your period, your privates are itchy and a tiny bit of clear stuff is showing up in your undies, you got a yeast infection. Didn't find out until recently what that even was. If you're like me and my mom, you may get them before your period (every. freaking. time) but it's fine. They go away on their own eventually, but you can tell your doctor you have a yeast infection and they'll give you a prescription. Don't remember what it's called, but they'll know. You take one pill, then it's gone by the next day

Stuff that may happen on your period no one told you about.

So there was a lot of misinformation, and just a huge lack of the nitty gritty stuff, when I was in school and I see a lot of young kids on forums asking if something is normal or worrying about stuff and adults who have wondered their whole lives if other people feel the same on their periods. 

Here’s some stuff about periods people might not talk about;

It can smell. But using scented pads isn’t a great idea, the chemicals in the perfume cause irritation. But here’s the thing; vaginas smell. All of them. All the time. Right now. YOU notice the smell because it’s literally part of you, but other people don’t. If it’s a foul smell and very strong you should speak with a gynecologist, but the average day-to-day odor is normal and doesn’t mean you’re dirty. 

Diarrhea all day every day.

 Or, alternately, constipation all day every day. 

ALSO alternatively, a healthy mix of both sprinkled randomly across the days of your period like too much nutmeg where no one asked nutmeg to be. 

Your first period might not look like a period at first. It might look, well, brown, and lead you to other conclusions about what’s going on in your skivvies. Then it might not come again the next month and show up on a totally different week when it does. Mine came like A LOT. It was very heavy and I bled through a pair of jeans in the middle of school it was so heavy. I didn’t know what it was and thought I was bleeding from my butt because my liar teacher said a period would only be a ‘tablespoon’. Tablespoon of lies. 

At some point your probably going to stain the back of the toilet seat with blood. That doesn’t mean your bleeding too much, or that your dirty, but it’s a tid bit of information I wish I knew as a kid so I could have known to look for it when using public restrooms or at friend’s houses. 

Period farts. 

Having sex on your period isn’t gross or dirty or wrong. Put an old towel down on the bed and have at it.

The feelings you have on your period are entirely valid and not imagined or unimportant because of your period. Whether or not your feelings are heightened by PMS they are still your feelings and should be respected. 

The ‘average’ period is anywhere from 3-10 days with any variation in flow. You shouldn’t be concerned because your period isn’t the same as your friends is, only if it changes from what’s average for you. There isn’t such a thing as a ‘normal period’ you need to fit into.

If you wear a disposable pad there will be a point where it’s going to unstick at some corner and when you pull it off it’s going to pull some of your pubic hair with it. This is going to suck. I am very sorry. 

If you wear a tampon there is going to be a point you will squeeze it out of yourself when you use the bathroom. Just change your tampon each time you go. Please listen to me on this. 

Swamp butt.

You will get blood stained thighs at some point. It’s going to cake onto your skin and make a mess just everywhere. 

The cashier doesn’t care about you buying pads/tampons/etc, they just had a guy buy 4 pounds of carrots, a box of Xtra Large ribbed condoms and cherry scented lube. Your pads are not on their radar of things to care about.

Washing Your Junk:

When you shower (if you want a bath i’d shower before hand or dont wash in the bath itself and shower after to get clean) remember you are not actually washing inside of your vagina, you’re washing the skin around it (labia, clitoris, all those good bits). Using a soft wash cloth with either very mild unscented soap or just warm water.  Seriously, stop putting washing products inside yourself; You do not need to wash the inside of your vagina and doing so can cause infections. Unless given products by your doctor there is no need to douche or use creams or wipes or other stuff like that. They’re lies sold to you to make you think you smell bad. 

 You know how your parents said ‘wipe front to back’?Same with washing, you don’t want to drag butt germs all over your vagina. Don’t do it. 

Some people find that trimming, or shaving, their pubic hair helps them control odor, or makes wearing sanitary products more comfortable, but it isn’t required and is personal preference with different individuals. There is no health benefit to shaving or trimming your pubic hair and it will not make you cleaner than if you didn’t shave. 

Wearing light breathable cotton undies during your period will help eliminate odor and not give you swamp butt. Especially in the summer. 

Washing after sex is a great idea and not just because it’s romantic. If you’ve ever had period sex before you will k n o w but if you have not I am going to just ask you to take my word for it and plan a shower afterwards. 

Feel free to tack on other stuff if you want. Tell me all your period secrets. 

Best Advice I’ve Ever Gotten

Are you a stayer or a goer? Figure it out.

There’s no wrong choice, but it is a choice. Don’t waffle in the moment whether you should stick something out, or bail at the first chance.

My friend Cat stays. She likes the stability, likes working things out.

I’m a runner. First whiff of something wrong and I’m gone.

I’ve wished I didn’t have to run away from things. Work, friends, school. I was running away from home long before I recognized that’s what I was doing.

I’ve never regretted running away, though. I’ve always regretting staying too long.

dealing with the worst case scenario

your condom breaks

you feel a lump on your breast

your friends are ignoring you

you’re stranded on an island 

you got rejected by a crush

you get into a car accident

you got stung by a bee/wasp

you got fired from your job

you’re in an earthquake

your tattoo gets infected

your house is on fire

you’re lost in the woods

you get arrested abroad

you get robbed

your partner cheated on you

you’re on a ship that’s sinking

you fall into ice

you’re stuck in an elevator

you hit a deer with your car

you have food poisoning

your pet passed away

you fall off of a horse

you or your friend has alcohol poisoning

you have toxic shock syndrome

your house has a gas leak

ADVICE FROM KOIKI

Say it with me: if someone has a problem with the type of phone i use ditch the bitch why a phone is a motherfluffing phone

There's my words of wisdom

In short don't let people control the type of phone you use cause at the end of the day you are the one dealing with the dang thing

a word of advice from wonder egg priority

now go shift.

Community defense is my answer when someone asks what we can do as plebs against trumps fascism. Arm and organize yourself around defending your community in accordance with local laws essentially.

DO NOT BREAK THE LAW

Act within it as you can in your area to “police” and protect your neighbors. If you see an ICE raid report it so people can act accordingly. If someone in random ass cloths tried to kidnap someone ACT as if they are pedophiles or traffickers cause they may be that as we have impersonators trying to kidnap women and children right now. Have plans to evac the most threatened people (LGBTQ, neurodivergent, homeless, or those with mental health issues) to safe areas or assist in them seeking asylum in Europe or Canada.

Noncompliance is also a requirement as officially ICE cannot invade your home or private property without a warrant and police assistance so keep your doors shut and call a lawyer if they come knocking. Same goes with police they need a warrant or probable cause so deny entry unless they have those and call a lawyer.

Arm yourself legally with a firearm (you too liberals) preferably something you are comfortable with or can handle. I recommend the 556/223 rifles like an AR. They are cheap relatively speaking and their recoil is light and easy to control for people not use to shooting a rifle. If that isn’t allowed or not an option there are plenty of pistols offering self defense needs. Train with your weapon and know it inside and out and remember “more sweat = less blood” meaning the more time you train the less you bleed in a fight.

If possible you could also join an org like the SRA (socialist rifle association) who are the based version of the NRA

Good luck, stay safe friends

reminder that you don't have to accept apologies from people who hurt you and that don't have to welcome anybody back into your life just because they've "changed"

Writing tips for long fics that helped me that no one asked for.

1.) Don't actually delete content from your WIP unless it is minor editing - instead cut it and put it in a secondary document. If you're omitting paragraphs of content, dialog, a whole scene you might find a better place for it later and having it readily available can really save time. Sometimes your idea was fantastic, but it just wasn't in the right spot.

2.) Stuck with wording the action? Just write the dialog then revisit it later.

3.) Stuck on the whole scene? Skip it and write the next one.

4.) Write on literally any other color than a white background. It just works. (I use black)

5.) If you have a beta, while they are beta-ing have them read your fic out loud. Yes, I know a lot of betas/writers do not have the luxury of face-timing or have the opportunity to do this due to time constraints etc but reading your fic out loud can catch some very awkward phrasing that otherwise might be missed. If you don't have a beta, you read it out loud to yourself. Throw some passion into your dialog, you might find a better way to word it if it sounds stuffy or weird.

6.) The moment you have an idea, write it down. If you don't have paper or a pen, EMAIL it to yourself or put it in a draft etc etc. I have sent myself dozens of ideas while laying down before sleep that I 10/10 forgot the next morning but had emailed them to myself and got to implement them.

7.) Remember - hits/likes/kudos/comments are not reflective of the quality of your fic or your ability to write. Most people just don't comment - even if they say they do, they don't, even if they preach all day about commenting, they don't, even if they are a very popular blog that passionately reminds people to comment - they don't comment (I know this personally). Even if your fic brought tears to their eyes and it haunted them for weeks and they printed it out and sent it to their friends they just don't comment. You just have to accept it. That being said - comment on the fic you're reading now, just do it, if you're 'shy' and that's why you don't comment the more you comment the better you'll get at it. Just do it.

8.) Remove unrealistic daily word count goals from your routine. I've seen people stress 1500 - 2000 words a day and if they don't reach that they feel like a failure and they get discouraged. This is ridiculous. Write when you can, but remove absurd goals. My average is 500 words a day in combination with a 40 hour a week job and I have written over 200k words from 2022-2023.

9.) There are dozens of ways to do an outline from precise analytical deconstruction that goes scene by scene to the minimalist bullet point list - it doesn't matter which one you use just have some sort of direction. A partial outline is better than no outline.

10.) Write for yourself, not for others. Write the fic you know no one is going to read. Write the fic that sounds ridiculous. You will be so happy you put it out in the world and there will be people who will be glad it exists.

“Oh,” They giggled, cheeks pink.

“Oh!” They gasped, hands to their mouth in horror.

“Oh,” they whined, gripping their hair in frustration.

“Oh,” they breathed, head back and lashes fluttering.

“Oh,” they mumbled, shifting awkwardly.

“Oh,” they deadpanned, arms crossed.

“Oh?” they asked, brow arched and smile bitter.

“Oh,” they chided with a smirk.

“Oh?” they asked, head tilted curiously.

“Oh!” they hissed, scrambling away.

“Oh,” they mumbled, rubbing their neck.

“Oh,” they uttered, eyes wide in awe.

“Oh,” they muttered with an ill-impressed frown.

“Oh!” They cried, throwing their arms around them.

“Oh,” they goaded, smiling mischievously.

“Oh,” they taunted, skipping backwards.

“Oh,” they snarked, hands on their hips.

“Oh,” they breathed, putting it all together.

“Oh,” they said softly, hugging themselves.

“Oh,” they whispered, holding back tears.

“Oh!” they gasped, ducking out of the way.

“Oh,” they uttered, and smacked their forehead.

“Oh,” they laughed, brows wiggling.

“Oh,” they tittered, batting their lashes.

“Oh,” they hissed, gritting their teeth.

"Oh."

Tag your dialogue.

practical writing advice part 2

part 1

get used to carrying a notebook around with you. or get used to writing on your phone. you will not always have access to your computer, but it’s much easier to take something compact with you to quickly jot down ideas. also i have chronic illness and sometimes my bones feel like lead and going upstairs to get my laptop is a herculean task, BUT i can write on my phone lying down instead of just scrolling through my camera roll and being miserable. which brings me to my next point:

if you have to choose between writing unconventionally or even unproductively and not writing at all, choose the writing. i’ve said before not to create a habit of writing in bed, but if it comes down to writing in bed or not writing whatsoever, i’ll write in bed. i just try to stretch before and after (which you should also do!!!).

you’re not wasting time or being silly by making playlists or moodboards or memes of your characters and environments. having fun with your stories outside of writing them is a good way to stay motivated.

i like to stop my writing sessions in a place where i know exactly what i want to write next, so when i pick back up i won’t be left hemming and hawing over where to begin. HOWEVER, if you’re absolutely locked in, don’t interrupt that flow state. it’ll be harder to find it again later—instead, wait until you find a natural place to stop where you haven’t run out of ideas.

“why do i have a headache 3 hours into my writing session?” because the last time you had a sip of water was 4 hours ago, you dingus! keep your drinks near your workspace while you write. and i do mean, like, a full bottle of water at least. if you’re like me, things stop existing when they leave your line of sight, so keep these beverages where you can see them and refill during bathroom breaks.

uhhh try not to think negatively about your writing while you’re doing it because when i do that i just get bummed out. “this scene is terrible” -> “oh yeah fuck it up oh yeah fuck it up” (positive reframing)

ok thanks bye

practical writing advice

part 2

avoid writing in bed if you can. writing in bed is the mind-killer. writing in bed is the little death that brings obliteration. you may think "but i can write AND be cozy" you will get sleepy so fast. 98% of the time when i try to get a nighttime writing session done in bed i go to sleep. maybe 70% of the time if it's an afternoon writing session. also it fucking kills your wrists.

STRETCH before writing. stretch as many parts of your body as possible ESPECIALLY YOUR WRISTS! i have chronic tendonitis in both of my arms from not doing this and it is manageable but it is Not Fun!

plug your phone in on the other side of the room. better yet, plug it in and leave it in another room. better yet, power it off and leave it in another room. "i'll just check one quick thing" do not underestimate the power of the doomscroll.

do a warmup. look up writing prompts (i like one-word prompts or prompts that focus on a general theme as it's easier to integrate into my writing style), set a timer for fifteen minutes, or ten, or five, and go ham. make it shitty or incomprehensible, as long as you make it. create a dump document for all your warmups. i currently have two novels in the works that started as one of these fifteen minute little warmups.

pick your background noise ahead of time if you use it, and look for something long. i listen to 3-hour-long silent hill ambient mixes on youtube dot com.

take breaks. around every 45 minutes, as i'm noticing myself begin to lose focus, i get up, grab a drink, get my blood flowing, and give myself some space to breathe.

sometimes i sit down to write and i think "every atom in my body is averse to doing this right now. i would rather dance barefoot on a bed of nails than open my laptop and start typing." and you know what i do? i go do something else instead. don't force it! it will become a chore.

that being said! write as often as possible. try to write every day. try to write at the same time. don't beat yourself up if you can’t, BUT the more often you write, the more often you'll want to write.

if you're stuck on a scene or a page or a chapter, go back to the last place where you felt like you knew what you were doing and start writing from there. keep a copy of your other writing in case you want to reuse it or refer back!

i don't know if this is something that will be helpful for other people but i start mentally preparing myself for my writing session a few hours ahead of time. i will say to myself, "today, at this time, i'm gonna sit down and write that scene where mina walks out on her book club, and it's going to be awesome and i'm looking forward to it." then, by the time i actually begin, i basically have the whole thing written out in my head and can just put it down to paper. it's a good way to at least kickstart the session !

ok thanks bye

guys…. the ideas in my head rn…. for smaus….

WHY DO I HAVE TO HAVE A JOB💔💔💔

gunna grind them all for yall tm for REAL😮‍💨

oKAY i’m thinking either…. you being a new student at jjh or you having the opposite cursed technique style as them…. might try and does a SMAU series involving both🫦💫🤍

WAIT ALSO DOES ANYONE KNOW HOW TO MAKE SMAU GROUP TEXTS i want to start a series and idk how to make the far group texts if u do hit me up i’ll sell u my liver or my first born 😘😘😘😘 thankkkss

i wish i was kidding tho HOW DO U DO THEM jdhdidjdkd im a fucking BOOMER I GUESS

Here's the one piece of uni advice I'll ever give: enjoy something about everything you do. There's gotta be one aspect, one Thing you like. Make it. Create it. I myself really enjoy writing with my fountain pen. It's smooth and feels liquid as I go. Really improves this note-taking business. You might like listening to very specific music as you walk to lecture. Buy a fancy lipstick. Wear it to seminars. Bam. Better mood. Paint your nails before a presentation. Wear those uber-comfortable socks you have. Find nice background vibes. Remove layers of hate from something hateable.

Sad news, friends. My cat, Howie (the one I've just changed my profile pic to) is going to be put down on Monday because of liver failure. He's twelve years old. I think this was definitely preventable, but I was only six when we got him, and being angry at my parents for making bad choices with him won't help at this stage.

Prettiest boy ever eating some turkey ❤️

I just wanted to let you guys know. If anyone has advice for comforting sick/dying cats please let me know. He's on pain medicine right now but I just want him to be as cozy as possible until Monday.

I want to do commission art, but I am inexperienced and needs advises.

I can only do digital art for the commission, so how can I send them to the requester once it's finished? How can the money transfer be done? How much do you think the cost should be put so it'd be fair?