American Government - Blog Posts

why shadow the hedgehog could legally run for president of the united states of america

requirement #1 : over 35

ok so you have to be 35 to run for president right? well we all know shadow is LEGALLY in his 50s (even tho mentally hes supposed to be around 15) in all sonic media, so that's one requirement cleared.

requirement #2 : natural born citizen of the USA

now you might ask about the fact that movie verse shadow is an alien. however. he landed encased in an asteroid and was transported to a north american station of the international military group GUN's research lab overseen by commander walters (who is also a commander in the US military). it can be assumed that not only did shadow’s asteroid land on US soil since it was under american military jurisdiction, but that the GUN lab is also on US soil. he was later awakened and "born" from the asteroid in the US lab, meaning that shadow the hedgehog legally has american birthright citizenship. so second requirement, cleared for the movie verse! if we're taking from the sonic games a little more, gerald robotnik is said to be working specifically with the united federation sector of GUN, which is specifically made to be the in-game equivalent of the united states of america. therefore, the space colony arc is an american vessel and is governed by american laws. presumably, anyone born on that ship, which is functionally an american military base, would also have birthright american citizenship because prior to 2019 (and shadow was born 50 years ago) babies born to military members on us military bases were granted US citizenship automatically, not to mention the fact that shadow is an entity literally created and owned by the government of the american federation. also, if we're counting gerald robotnik as his "father", we can also assume that he has either been granted US citizenship or has a green card in order to be eligible to work for the US military, and if we assume the former than shadow would be considered a US citizen at birth even if he was born in international airspace. so second requirement, cleared in the game universe! (for the record there aren't like actual real laws dictating what happens if someone is born in space bc that hasn't happened so im being a little loose with my interpretation based on what laws there are about similar things but yknow)

requirement #3 : 14 year residency

he was also 15 in both universes before being put in cryosleep, meaning he operated as a resident of the USA either in the US in the movie verse or on a us military base in the game verse, so he'd meet the "14 years of residency" requirement, so 3rd requipment cleared!

crime?

and yeah sure he was basically imprisoned for 50 years but any crimes shadow may have committed wouldn't bar him from becoming president because we've already established that felons can be president this year so! there you go!

disclaimer : i am not an expert in american law or sonic for that matter so sorry if this isn’t 100% accurate but nothing i could find online contradicts it soooooo

‘don’t be political’ ‘I don’t want to see that on my dash’ ‘keep your opinions to yourself’

NO. Absolutely not- over my dead fucking body, you hear me?!

Don’t you dare try to make yourself small, don’t you dare be passive and roll over while they run your country to the ground. I’m not even American and this makes my blood boil, watching all the horrible things happening over there. They have taken your rights. Do you understand me? It is propaganda, plain and simple. Staying quiet just to appease other people is exactly what they want. They want you to remain passive, they want you to hope that things will get better on their own.

here’s the simple truth- it won’t. not unless you do something about it. we all saw it with the UHC shooter, citizens being abused and refused for years, but the second someone leaps into actions, suddenly the gears start turning. I understand that politics isn’t for everyone, and it may very well mentally affect you. but I believe this isn’t the time for that.

YOUR PRESIDENT JUST PUT A BUNCH OF LGBTQ KIDS AT RISK. THE WORLDS RICHEST MAN DID THE NAZI SALUTE AT YOUR INAUGURATION. YOU ARE WATCHING THEM TAKE AWAY YOUR RIGHTS IN REAL TIME ON NATIONAL TELEVISION.

for fucks sake, that doesn’t bother you?

this is the time for action. Do not let them take away your voice. Be inconvenient. Be angry. Be a public menace. Be as fucking difficult to the government as you could possibly be.

it could actually save a life.

i think the world would be a better place if it got to decide who the next american president would be. we don't deserve to suffer for your mistakes, and you've proven yourself to be stupid because you didn't learn from the first time Orange Embarrassment was in office.

'russian villain' this 'russian spy' that girl your own intelligence officials are selling information just accept the fact that your government is shit