Angst - Blog Posts

the x reader fic i read on WATTPAD was the most beautifully written fiction piece i’ve ever seen. the detail. the realistically portrayed emotions.

reblog if you’ve read fanfictions that are more professional, better written than some actual novels. I’m trying to see something

art with Donny from my au!!

❗WARNING: wound/blood

for some reason, I had to change my account, sorry, posts will now be published only here...It's pretty sad for me.

I was kicked out of my ao3 and Tumblr accounts without the possibility of recovery Due to Russian mail and I had to buy myself an American mail, lmao...Okay, now I hope everything will be fine ^^

I want to write fan fiction but I need ideas and characters please! 😭 I can never thing of anything-

Things accepted are:

SEXUALITY/GENDERS:

~Any!! (Bi, les, gay, pan, ace, poly, etc.)

~Any!! ( Afab, amab, Ftm, mtf, genderfluid, nb, etc.)

FANDOMS:

~ MHA/BNHA

~ FNAF Security Breach

~ Monster High

~ Percy Jackson ( I have the books, movies, and watched all of the show! so I am fully equipt to write about them! )

~ Sam and Colby

~ Avatar ( James Cameron )

~ OITNB

~HxH

~BTS ( any K-pop group )

~Harry Potter ( books and movies too! )

~My Babysitters a Vampire

~ Stardew valley

~ Game of Thrones

And tons of others ( I'll make a list sometime this week or next of everyone I'll write! If there are any requests then I can and most likely will write for them after doing the needed research! )

I will do smut 100%, fluff 100%, angst 100%, just give me ideas and I’ll tell you if I can or can’t do it ;)

I MISS THE HAYAKAWA FAMILY SO MUCH :((( SCREW U FUDGEMOTOR!

The warmth of his flesh (re worked)

CW: Cannibalism (no gore actually described, just.. subtle descriptions? Probably could make you queezy idk) This is my first time writing a fic, so critique is welcome! :)

NOT A KINK/FETISH!! (i'm not weird trust)

I specifically wrote this for school in like 1 hour after the submission time so it's rushed... uh yeah that's it from me! :))

Summary:

Hyacinth can't help herself, she really can't! She wants to consume her lovers' flesh and she hates herself for it. What was she think of course he's going to say no! He's going to be so disgusted, what if he reports he- What? He said yes? He said he'd be honoured to?

Oh...oh.How very lovely.

Continue reading!

“I’m rather disgusting aren’t I? I must reek of death.” He didn’t flinch, he didn’t look surprised. He just stared. “I will never be able to get the feeling of death off of me.” He just sat there. He didn’t say a word. “Especially after becoming one with it.” Hyacinth paused, waiting for a change in his expression. She gripped the fabric of his dress, waiting for the worst to come. 

“What an odd name you have, how come I've just noticed?” He ignored her, continuing with his ramble. “Hyacinth, Hyacinth, Hyacinth… surely you know what it means? He laughed. “What am I saying? Of course you know. A desire for forgiveness. Is that why you’ve come to meet me, at this hour?”

He looked back at her, her body tensed, her hands curled into his fists. “I’ve.. consumed flesh before.” 

“How many times?”

“Three times- it’s a horrible feeling though, it's honestly quite disgusting-”

“Then why do you do it?”

“I…” She sighed, pushing her hair back with her hands. Her mind was racing. What a stupid, stupid idea. Why did she think this would’ve worked? She should’ve just kept it in. But she couldn’t. The thought was consuming her every moment of the day. Every glance at him would make it even worse. She tried to rub the feeling off, taking hour long baths, scrubbing her skin till the water turned brown. She was disgusting, thoroughly disgusting. What a disgusting, terrible human she was. Was she even human?

What kind of human would have thoughts of consuming their own lover? Her wretched flesh had to be punished, for thinking in such ways. She’d scratch her skin, days on end, attempting to rip it out, to pay for the terrible things she’d done, yet she just couldn't stop. She never threw the meat out of her cellar, she never stopped using it. And now she keeps on going, now with her fourth lover. But this time felt different. He was different. He provided her comfort like no one else could. To have that comfort within forever, would be an ultimate bliss. 

He snapped his fingers. “You okay love? You seem disoriented.” Even now, after hearing what she’s done he still cares for her. His care disgusts her and comforts her at the same time.

“Did you hear me? I said i-”

“Yes, yes, you’ve cannibalized your lovers before, what else?” 

Her blood ran cold, her eyes wide. How did he know about that? She never told him that detail.

“How did you know?”

“You forget I've known you long before we were even together darling. Of course I noticed when my friends went missing, it’s just now I know why.” He chuckled.

“You don’t care? You’re not mad?”

“How could I be? I haven’t done anything remarkable in my entire existence, except being with you. Now you’ve done something that people wretch at the thought of. How wonderful.”

She scoffed at him, angered by his unexpected acceptance. “You know what I’m going to ask you then, right?”

“Of course, I recognize your patterns, and I graciously accept.” He bowed dramatically, unable to hide his laugh.

“Don’t mock me!” She looked at him, tears starting to well up in her eyes. “It’s not like I want to! hate the very thought of parting with you!” It was true, she really hated herself for wanting to do such a thing.

“Now why are you crying? I didn’t yell at you did I? Even better, I accepted!” He sighed, putting his back against the wall.

“But why?” She was confused, concerned, scared, but another feeling was creeping up her back. Glee. A lover becoming a part of you is one thing, but when they accept and are willing? Now their souls really would be intertwined. It would be her perfect happy ending to her love story.

“Because all I am is yours. I’ve never done much in my life, and I don't think I will. All I want at this point is to please you. My death will be meaningless. But if I offer myself to you, perhaps..” He paused, refusing to continue further. He decides to go on, realizing that this would be the perfect to let out his inner most feelings. "All my life, I've just, been there. I'm not good at anything other than being with you. You're all I am. I've dedicated my time to being yours, yours to control, to give you everything you've ever wanted. That's my only purpose."

He stopped to lower on to his knees, holding her hands while staring right into her widened eyes.

"Who even am I if I can't make you happy?

She looked at him, unsure of what to do. Thank him? Cry? Hyacinth froze, unable to respond.

“I ask for one thing from you though.”

“And that is?”

“Time. Time spent with you.”

“Is that all?”

“Yes.”

At 6:00 in the afternoon, Hyacinth dragged her lover to her house, or rather her mansion. They rarely spent time there together so he often forgot about his darling’s lavish lifestyle. He’d rather go somewhere else, somewhere less stuffy, somewhere less… uncomfortable. It wasn’t her peculiar diet that made him feel uneasy, nor was it the way her wide eyes bore into his soul. It was that wretched mansion. The entire estate was gloomy, adapting a color palette only a ghost could enjoy. It was painted a dark grey, the roof an even darker shade. The windows loomed over him, reaching the ceiling. The entire mansion was surrounded by long, thin trees. Oh how he hated her place, but whatever would make her happy.

At 7:00 pm they were sitting in the living room, the fireplace warming up the entire room. Hyacinth was laughing at a dumb joke he made, one that he didn’t even find funny. They were laying on the wooden floor, talking about the most trivial things in existence. She played with his hair while he went on about his day, before he saw her, which instantly brightened his day. 

At 9:00 pm he attempted to fancy up the dining room, with much disapproval from Hyacinth. “I’m just preparing the dining room for your meal”, he joked. She didn’t find it very amusing. He stuffed random flowers such as lilies and hydrangeas into the closest vases and pots he could find. He lit candles all across the room, turning off the chandelier, making the entire room illuminated by the melting candles.

At 9:30 they sat down on opposite sides, discussing the most random topics they could think of. She laughed at all of his poorly thought out jokes, cracking a smile that could light up an entire room. “You know I love you right?” He smiled at her, resting his head on his hand. “I’m aware.”

“I’m doing this because I love you.”

“Yeah.”

“You provide me with a comfort that I want to be engulfed in forever.”

“Then I'll give you that.”

“I really do love you, I really do. I can’t help myself.” She started to cry.

“And here comes the waterworks.” 

“I hate myself for doing this to you.”

“I don't mind.”

“I love you.”

“...”

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

At 2:30 am Hyacinth’s full course meal was prepared. There was everything he could ever ask for. She grabbed her knife and fork hesitantly, staring at her meal for a while. She told herself to stop staring and start eating. If she didn’t start soon, the food would probably go bad, then it would all be for nothing. She slowly picked up her fork, stabbing the meat, slowly carving into it with her fork. She opened her mouth, her lip quivering. She took her first bite.

At 3:15 am the entire dining room was a mess. There was food scattered across the long table. She had long forgotten about her utensils, instead opting for her hands. She was probably eating her entire stock in one sitting. She had never done that before, but this time it was worth it. Every bite she took provided more and more comfort, her insides melting from the chewy texture. She just couldn’t stop herself. She grabbed at more meat, her face stuffed to the brim with the meat, the remnants spilling on her white, floor length frock. She tried to make herself throw up, but she just couldn’t. Her face was stained with tears. She sobbed through each bite. “I’m really sorry, I really am! I just couldn’t help myself! You just taste too good!” She shoved her face with more bites. “I’m so disgusting, aren’t i?”

The glutton regrets

What did I ever do to deserve this?

A lot of times, due to either a lack of knowledge, or just plain ignorance, many dogs might get diseases or even pregnant due to their owner not taking the responsibility of getting them vaccinated/neutered. They're abandoned and left on the streets to fend for themselves, unable to understand why their owners have left them.

I love one sided itafushi

Guys, I crave a really long, well written ANGSTY love triangle fic between Yuji, Nobara, and Megumi it's not even FUNNY. Here's my little dabble at it. I might make a full fic :3

Not proofread!!!

Trios never work

“Why are you so cold to me, Meg..? I just want to talk to you.” Nobara whispers in a cracking voice.

Megumi feels anger swirl in his gut. He hates how she's making herself out to be the victim when she's the one torturing him. Dragging him around for whatever sick and twisted reason. She has Yuji wrapped around her finger, and she wants to rub it all in his face.

“You just want me to listen.” he snapped, not phased by the sad look in her eyes.

Her mouth gaped open, and she looked like a fish gasping out of water. Her throat squeezed tight, making getting words out so much more difficult.

“No..no that's not what I want, Meg I-”

“Stop calling me that for fucks sake Nobara!” He cut her off.

“You trying to include me in this fucked up trio makes me sick, everytime i hear that dumb nickname I want to rip my ears off!”

His teeth bared as he yelled furiously at her. He took a deep breath, rolling his shoulders as he backed up. His voice lowered now as he continued to speak. “You are so insufferable. If you don't realize that, you really are stupid.”

Her lips trembled, fat tears streaming down her face as she stared at him with wide eyes. Eyes full of confusion and hurt. She was hurt he felt that way, and she would rather die than make him feel that way.

“Meg-gumi I'm so sorry. Did you feel left out? Unwanted? I don't understand, I really tried to include you,” she sniffled.

He scoffed, his curled lips full of irritation.

“You really just don't get it, That's the problem, Nobara.”

Her brows furrowed, and she looked completely lost. That ticked him off.

“You try to include me when you and Yuji are already all over each other. I'm not needed, and yet you still want me around. Does that not seem cruel to you?” He asked with a tilt of his head.

Her heart stopped. Her lips formed a deep frown as she began to shake her head slowly. Her eyes squeezed shut as tears forced their way out from behind her lids.

“No that's not what.. I would never… Megumi, I like you! I like you, that's why I always—” she bit her lip, looking down as the tears blurred and warped her vision, “—that's why I always tried to involve you..”

Usually, when she says something she's been longing to, it feels like a weight was lifted. This time, though, she felt the weight multiply. It clung to her like a curse, something dreadful. The air was just as heavy. She could barely breathe. Her lungs wouldn't open up all the way, even though she just opened herself up to him.

He stared at her with angry brows but shocked eyes. He never considered this. He always thought she liked Yuji and didn't care about him. Was he really that oblivious? He didn't notice it when she'd always beg to do his makeup when she'd drag him to try desserts, to go anywhere with her. All the memories suddenly rushed into his head, wracking around in a painful manner. He squeezed his nose bridge as the skin between his brows crinkled.

He didn't know what to say, how to go about this.

“I'm…I'm sorry.” He ran his fingers through his hair, revealing more of his face.

“I imagine I don't seem so desirable now.” He whispered.

Nobara blinked away a few more tears. She sniffled before smiling.

“No, you can't sway me that easily.” She said, trying to lighten the mood.

This just made the pang of guilt in Megumi's chest grow. It was like the feeling itself had tendrils and was digging deeper inside him.

“Nobara. I'm sorry, but I can't forge false feelings.”

She bit the inside of her cheek so hard just so she wouldn't cry. She nodded with a smile.

“No, I understand. Don't worry about it.” She assured him.

He hesitantly nodded.

“Sorry for making things awkward between us,” she muttered.

“Don't be sorry.”

She smiled weakly before walking off.

"Sing to me"

A/n: This is just for fun so don't come at me; don't any of y'all take any of my post either!❤︎

CW: This is in the context of my Mha Oc "Crimson/Iris Hayashi"; short angst story

Enjoy(˶˃ ᵕ ˂˶)

The night was heavy, thick with the scent of rain and blood. The sirens in the distance weren’t close enough—weren’t fast enough.

Crimson sat on the cold pavement, knees scraped, uniform torn, but none of that mattered. Not when Hawks—Keigo—was in her arms, bleeding too much, breathing too shallowly.

His wings were wrecked, feathers matted with red, and his golden eyes, usually sharp and full of mischief, were unfocused. There was no cocky grin, no teasing remark. Just pain.

Iris swallowed hard, pressing a hand against the wound in his side. “Keigo, stay with me.”

He exhaled, slow and shaky, his fingers weakly grasping at her wrist. “I’m here,” he murmured, but his voice was barely above a whisper.

She could feel him slipping, his warmth fading.

No. No, no, no.

Her vision blurred.

He blinked up at her, searching for something—reassurance, comfort, her.

Then, in the quietest voice, almost embarrassed, he asked, “…Sing to me?”

Iris’s breath caught in her throat.

She had only ever sung for him in moments of peace—soft hums while lying in bed, quiet melodies when he couldn’t sleep. But this—this—was different.

Her voice shook as she whispered, “You’re gonna be okay, baby.”

Keigo huffed something like a laugh. “Yeah… I know but...?” His grasp on her wrist wearingly tightened. "I need to hear that gorgeous voice of yours, dove."

A lump formed in her throat, but she nodded. She cradled him closer, her fingers brushing through his messy, blood-damp hair, and with a deep, trembling breath, she started to sing.

Her voice was raw but beautiful, carrying a warmth even the cold rain couldn’t steal away.

The song was something soft, something slow—one he had heard from her before, late at night when everything was still.

Keigo sighed against her, his body relaxing slightly, his grip on her wrist loosening—but not letting go.

“Pretty…” he mumbled, eyes slipping closed. “Knew I’d be in love with you the first time I heard you sing…”

Tears burned her eyes.

“You’re just saying that,” she whispered through a shaky breath, pressing her forehead against his. A tear slipping from her swollen eyes and on to his cheek.

He smiled weakly. “Hell no, you got the prettiest voice.” His eyes squinted slightly open, "matches your face..."

She let out a snort, voice cracking as she kept singing, even as the sirens grew closer, even as the rain kept falling.

She would keep singing.

Because as long as she did—he was still here.

Hope you enjoyed this! If you have any requests don't be shy! Also, if you want, I can write a little about my Mha Oc and her background 👀

I was in a mode to draw angst. If you recognize this scene, I apologize.

hey so i’ve never written a story before, but me and my friend wanted to write a made up story ab her, her ex bf, and a guy in his friend group that’s in love with him.

the plan for the story is Luis (the friend) is madly obsessed and in love with Matthew (the bf (now ex)). however, Matt is still dating Gabi (my friend) so Luis’ hate for her just keeps growing. the story is gonna be mostly in his pov with the occasional Gabi or Matt. he’s just gonna be slowly going crazy over their relationship and start trying to break them up. eventually, they do break up (bc of something Luis said or the irl reason, we r still thinking) which Luis is VERY happy about. BUT!! Matthew doesn’t want Luis. That’s were the story ends (we might do a sequel lol) pure angst, no happy ending for anyone.

this story is COMPLETELY made up, but yes we will be sending the whole friend group the final story dw 😌

anyway, I was just coming on here to ask for tips on writing and if anyone would be interested in reading it lol

k thanks love ya ❤️

Help to find a fic

I can’t remember was platform it was on which is the main problem;

It’s established Bakugou x reader with developing relationship Kiri x Baku and Reader

It’s ABO and Alpha Baku pursues Alpha Kiri without checking with reader and so she gets pissed and kinda almost breaks up w them

Baku wants them 3 in a relationship but he’s an idiot who doesn’t know how to actually apologize so he tries to make reader jealous by getting Uraraka to sit on his lap and wear him jacket to ‘make her realize he has options and that if she doesn’t come back she can be replaced’

Kiri gets pissed because wtaf is wrong with him and tries to talk to reader but she thinks he was in on it

Eventually she punches Uraraka and breaks her nose and when Baku tries to pull her away she punches him too

He tries to give her a scented gift as an indirect apology but it’s the same jacket he had put on Uraraka and he didn’t even wash it just tried to ‘cover up her scent’ but it just makes matters worse

He’s walking in the halls and stumbles across Present Mic and PM pretty much says that Baku is an idiot and that what he did only fucked up his relationship and that this stuff he got from his parents (via observation) wasn’t how to actually do a relationship and that is was just their kind of foreplay

Baku asks Mic for help

And that’s as far as I got and I desperately wanna finish reading it ;-;

ATSUSHI ANGST!! #2

(Uyarılar: Yeme bozukluğu, kendine zarar verme, shin soukoku, soukoku,Dazai)

Atsushi: "Aha- Sadece soğuk algınlığı. Ayrıca kedi değil kaplanım!"

              ATSUSHI POV:

Dazai-san anlamış gibi.. Umarım anlamamışdır.. Siparişleri verdik, yerken Yetimhane Müdürünün seslerini duydum "Bu yemeği haketmiyorsun! İşe yaramaz." Kafamda yankılanıyordu.

Atsushi: "2 dakikaya gelirim"

Hemen tuvalete doğru koştum.

⚠️ (Başlıyor)

Klozetin başına durdum ve ellerimi boğazıma götürdüm, zorla da olsa yediğim herşeyi kusmuştum. Elimi ve ağzımı yıkandıktan sonra aceleye diğerlerinin yanına gittim.

⚠️ (Bitti)

Herkesin yemeği bitirdiğini gördüm. O kadar uzun mu sürmüştü? Boş verdim. Soru sorulmasın diye aklıma gelen ilk şeyi söyledim.

Atsushi: "Dazai-san, görev dosyasını alabilir miyiz? "

Dazai: "Akutagawa'ya verdim bile~!"

Atsushi: "Tamam o zaman!"

Akutagawa: "Artık gitsek mi?"

Atsushi: "Evet, oldukça geç oldu. Bence biz yavaştan gidelim"

Akutagawa onayladıktan sonra, kaldığımız yere doğru yürümeye başladık.

(Ehe, aklıma geldikçe yeni bölüm atcam:3)

"Kill Me."

[A Diluc x Jean fanfic]

Warning: Death, angst, mentions of torture

Note: This was actually supposed to be a Diluc x reader but JaeLuc angst is just... Yea

"You have to kill me."

Those are the most ridiculous words that have ever escaped Jean's lips the entire time Diluc has been together with her. Yet...

"Of course, love."

He raises his claymore, ready to slash it down her body. Though his expression and stance says that they're ready, his eyes do not. Jean slowly looks up to his hands and notice how they're barely shaking. A sad smile made its way to her lips.

"It's okay."

Diluc didn't want to do this. Not at all. Not after he finally finds the only person that can make him feel feelings he had long forgotten, the only one that can finally make him smile so happily and genuinely, the only one who can make him relax despite all the burden he's carrying on his shoulders. He was not ready to lose the person he loves the most.

"Jean, I..."

The blonde looks straight into his eyes.

"Do it."

"I..."

Muffled voices are heard from afar, yelling, "Find the traitor!"

Diluc is not ready to lose the love of his life, but he's also not willing to give her up to the knights. With one final loving look from Jean, he brings the flaming claymore with all his might, hoping that he can end her life in one slash. The once highly respected Acting Grand Master coughs out blood before her body collapses onto the ground.

The nobleman puts away his claymore, eyes desperately scanning any signs of life from Jean but much to his disappointment, there were none. Eventually, the knights find him and Jean's corpse.

"Master Diluc. I assume you have taken care of her?" One of the three knights question.

"Of course. Now, take her away and release the others." He ordered, staring at the leader of the group with a sharp glare.

"As per your request, Master Diluc."

To think that Jean was labelled as a traitor just because she was falsely accused of being in shady businesses with the Fatui angers Diluc and as a result, Barbara, Lisa, Amber and Kaeya were locked up and interrogated the hard way. He had visited them. They all were in bad conditions after receiving countless of beatings.

He was determined to save Jean, but his efforts were in vain and the only way to end her suffering is to take her life. To watch the life in her eyes disappear as quickly as he brought down his claymore onto her body, it kills him.

To say he was devastated was an understatement. He didn't even say or receive one final 'I love you' before she left him for good.

Mammon x Reader (Promise)

Warning: Angst, Hatred

Throwing his jacket in a random direction in his room, Mammon runs a hand through his hair before letting himself fall onto his bed. It's not the comfiest bed he's gotten, not that he often sleeps on it, but this time, it's as if the mattress is lulling him to sleep, the temptation to just close his eyes. But he doesn't. No, he can't.

Rolling onto his back, he puts his right arm in the air and looks at his hand, more specifically his pinky finger. The finger you placed your promise upon.

"I will never leave you, Mammon. I promise."

Those were your words and yet... Mammon lets out a sigh and puts down his arm, eyes staring at the empty ceiling. After you left, he was hurt. So, so hurt. His heart aches for you but he can never see you ever again. Tears well up in his eyes but he blinks them back, refusing to look weak even though there's no one else with him. He feels as if you'd judge him from afar.

The Great Mammon feeling hurt by a human. It's such a ridiculous thought to him and yet here he is, turning that statement into real life.

"You promise?" Mammon looks at the human, his human.

You nod, smiling.

"Lies." Mammon whispers, gritting his teeth.

"I promise."

"Lies!" He sits upwards and unconsciously turns into his demon form out of anger.

Realizing his own form and anger, he turns back to his normal self and hugs his knees. If he were to push away what little pride he has left, he'd pray to his own father and kill himself which would send him back to the Celestial Realm.

What did he do wrong? Where did it all began? How did he... Lose you? So many questions flood his mind, swirling around like a tornado but none can be answered other than you but you're gone. He could've ask you if given the chance but he refuses to and he regrets it bit by bit. Every. Single. Day.

"Damn it..." Mammon's voice crack, his shoulders slightly shaking. "Damn it! Fuck!"

He punches his pillow, the soft cushion harshly hitting the wall. "How fucking stupid..."

His heart aches so much. He wants to see you so much but he just can't. He refuses to.

Walking through the halls of RAD, Mammon hides a small gift box behind his back. He plans to surprise his human with an item he had bought with his own money that he worked on. He can't wait to see the happiness on your face. After all, he loves the bright smile on your face and every time you give him a smile, even if it's just a small one, he's just falling more and more for you. Truly, he is in love.

Just as he was about to enter your class, he hears your conversation.

"Yeah, Mammon's so annoying and so fucking stupid, I mean, did he really think that I actually like him? Bitch, please. He's just head over heels over me." Your laughter is heard.

Mammon takes a moment to process your words and when he finally does, overcome by wrath, he barges into your classroom. A look of shock and horror is displayed on your face but Mammon couldn't care less. He threw the gift at the floor near you and clenches his fists.

"If ya fucking hate me so much, then tell me straight to my face! Here I thought that yer' sincere and aren't like my brothers at all but I was so fucking wrong!"

"Mammon, I-"

"No, shut yer' fucking mouth, ya' lowly piece of shit! I don't want to see ya' anymore! If I see ya', don't think I'll beat the shit outta ya'!"

"Fine! Just get out of my sight, scumbag! Your brothers were right about you!"

From that moment on, he avoids the human. It hurts him. Even after betraying him like that, stomping onto his trust like that, degrading him like that, he still loves you but because of you, he can no longer trust another other than his own brothers, not again. He doesn't want to get hurt anymore but he just can't bring himself to hate you even after everything you've done.

Mammon sobs and lays down on his bed. He fights his tiredness as the night lasts for a couple more hours, gradually losing sleep. It's bizarre how love can be so simple and yet so painful if not reciprocated or worse, been told that you're not loved.

Solomon x GN! MC

Warning! Death, angst

*****

Solomon, a powerful wizard, is your lover. How you manage to acquire his love and attention is beyond everyone else and even you sometimes, but you're glad that you're his and he's yours. Unfortunately, your medical background doesn't paint a pretty picture for you.

It's been at least three months since you and Solomon has been together, madly in love. How you wish that you didn't have to break news to him but you must since he will find out sooner or later. You have informed the seven avatars and angels that your condition is deteriorating with Lord Diavolo and Barbatos already knowing beforehand. As much as you wanted to live, knowing what happened to their sister, Lilith, you didn't want to cause more harm than you've already done.

"Hey, MC." Mammon starts up a conversation while you're watching both him and Leviathan play a game.

You hum in response. With much hesitation, the greedy demon asks, "When are ya' going to tell him?"

Silence. Leviathan elbows Mammon in the guts as you thought of a response, finally answering his question with, "Tomorrow. It'll be cruel if I continue this charade with him."

A dry laugh emits from your starting to pale lips. "I'm so cruel to him, aren't I? He deserves someone better, not someone who's dying so easily from a disease."

The moment the words rolled off your tongue, Mammon and Leviathan abandon their game, not caring that their characters are getting killed on screen. The secondborn grabs your shoulders and gently shakes you, saying, "Are ya' crazy? It's us and him that don't deserve ya'!"

"For once, Mammon's right. Don't ever say that again, MC!" The envious demon said in turn.

But they only receive yet another short and dry laugh. "I only have one month left to live. No one can help me now nor will I ever live as long as Solomon hoped. I... I'm such a terrible partner and friend."

This time, it's the thirdborn who shakes you by the shoulders. "No, you're not! You're the one who managed to keep up together! Without you, who knows what would've happened to us! To Belphegor even!"

A sad, small smile manage to make its way to your lips. "I don't know what have I done to deserve you guys but I'm glad to have met you."

*****

The next day arrived quicker than you've had anticipated. Handkerchief in hand, you cover your mouth with the small cloth as you cough into it while mentally hoping that blood doesn’t stain your handkerchief. Lucifer and Satan, who are by your side, only looks at you with concerned looks, feeling useless and helpless since they can't do anything to help except be there for you.

"MC!" A familiar cheery voice is heard from behind. Oh, how have the Fates become to cruel.

You quickly hide the cloth in your pocket and turn to Solomon with the same lovely smile you always give him. "Yo', Solomon!"

Taking their cue to leave, Lucifer and Satan leaves you with your lover. Once you two stand face-to-face with each other, your lovely smile is slowly replaced with a sorrowful look on your face. The wizard quickly took note of this and questions about your sudden change in expression.

You tightly grab his hand as if your life depended on it, staring into his eyes. A barely audibly whisper 'follow me' left your lips as you drag him to somewhere private. After checking that nobody will eavesdrop on your conversation, you let our a sigh and your heartbeat begins to pick up its pace.

Your silence only makes Solomon worry more and a million negative thoughts occupy his mind. Do you want to break up with him? Did you not love him anymore? Did something bad happened? Unfortunately, what you said only made him stare at you with both shock and horror.

"Solomon, I have to tell you about my... My health. It's getting worse the last few months and both Lucifer and Lord Diavolo tried their best to find the best doctors from each realm to try and help me but... There's no cure. There's... Not much time left for me."

Solomon refuses to believe those words. He takes a step back and shakes his head. "Th-This is n-not funny, M-MC. P-Please t-tell me it's a joke."

But you shake your head. "I wish it was but it's not a joke. I'm dying, Solomon. I only have one month left to live."

"N-No. No, no, no. M-Maybe I can learn a-a healing spell o-or whip up a-"

You shut him up by grabbing his hands and placing your head against his chest, hearing his rapid heartbeat. "Please, Solomon. If Lord Diavolo or Simeon can't do it, what can you do? We're only humans, Solomon. We're the weakest of the three realms. What makes you think you can find a spell, much less a cure for me? My time is almost up, Solomon. At least let me spend my last moments with the people I love."

Still, he refuses to believe you but... "Fine. Fine. I-I'll respect that."

You feel wet droplets soaking your scalp but you couldn't care less. The both of you stayed like that until the bell rung. Unfortunately, your classes with Solomon are very little and limited so when you exit the room, he hugs you tightly before sadly parting from you.

Ever since that day, Solomon tries to spend as much time with you and even sleeps with you with Lucifer's permission. When your condition worsened however, Lord Diavolo has declared that you no longer have to attend school and is issued to be moved to his castle so that Barbatos can take care of you.

The week of the retreat that is held at Lord Diavolo's castle has came around. How unfortunate can you be? It's also your last week here. Upon finally meeting you, Solomon is quick to engulf you in a tight, warm hug.

Your last week is spent with everyone you loved, like what you've requested to the wizard but time doesn't wait for no one. Your body is extremely weak to the point where you sometimes would fall and pass out. Your coughing fits have become a frequent and daily thing, much to everyone's dismay. Your energy is slow to replenish, your health deteriorating quickly, your face looks like you haven't slept in days and your life force quickly fading away.

Today is the last day of retreat and also your last day on Earth. You wish you hadn't been chosen for this exchange program as you knew that you've hurt everyone but at the same time, you're glad as well or else you would never meet such amazing people, especially Solomon.

In your temporary room, Asmodeus does your makeup to make you seem more lively than ever before for everyone. Your tired eyes only stare out of the window, the dark sky decorated by sprinkles of lights and a crescent moon. Breathing has also becoming an exercise for you, only receiving oxygen through your mouth. As Asmodeus works on your blush, you suddenly have a coughing fit.

The fourthborn quickly grabs your handkerchief and hands it to you to which you quickly snatch it from his hand and cover your mouth with. After a few moments, you wipe your mouth and look at the pool of scarlet that the cloth had manage to absorb. Asmodeus only sighs at the sight, quickly applying the blush for you before you could have another fit.

"There we go." He stands up and smiles at you as if you were a piece of priceless artwork. "You look stunning."

"Thanks, Asmo." You stand up and approach the mirror provided in the room. In the mirror, you do appear to have more life.

"Let's go." The demon opens the door for you and helps you walk towards the ballroom.

When you arrive to your desired area, the wizard is quick to greet you which prompts Asmodeus to leave the both of you. "You look amazing as always, MC. I wish the makeup is real..."

You only offer him a small smile, your croaky voice uttering out, "I'll be fine. Let's enjoy this final night."

Solomon's eyes are filled with sadness and despair but for you, he's willing to be happy for you. Music fills the room and your lover extends a hand for you to grab and you did. His other hand gently wraps around your torso as you hold onto his shoulder, the both of you start to dance despite your weak body but he did slow down his movements so that you could keep up with him. Unlike last time around, only the demons, angels and humans alike are present in the room, the other two species watching as the both of you sway with the melody. In that very moment, so many thoughts had pop up in his head.

How he wished that he was more powerful. How he wished that there was a cure for your illness. How he wished that Simeon had the power to help you. How he wished that you can remain in his arms forever. How he wished that this moment will last forever.

How he also wished that he had never met you.

Yet here he is, dancing with his partner, desperately trying not to tear up for their sake. When the music stopped and the way you fall into his arms, he knew that you only had moments left to live so he hugs you once again, placing his lips on your forehead. His soft lips linger on your skin for a few moments before looking at you. "What else do you want to do?"

"Play... Play something on- on the harp for me, S-Solomon." You requested, your exhausted eyes starting to droop.

He nods his head. "Whatever you want, my love."

The wizard slowly guides you towards the instruments provided in the room, taking a seat on the small bench with you sitting beside him. Everyone else only watches both of your movements, not making a ruckus like how they'd usually do.

"Solomon..." You breathe out, placing your head on his shoulder as you make yourself comfortable next to him. "Play... Play that song."

Your voice becomes quieter the more you speak. Solomon closes his eyes and takes a breather. He wanted to cry, he wanted to hug you, he wanted to see your face one last time before you permanently close your eyes but he holds himself back. His shaky hands make their way towards the strings and his fingers start plucking the strings, a beautiful melody you had always loved plays.

Though, not even a minute through, you started coughing which made your lover stop and check up on you. Luckily, it wasn’t as severe so you said, "Continue no matter what. I want to hear you play one last time."

His lips quiver but he fulfills your request nonetheless. His fingers never stop plucking the strings even if you had to cough. Midway through, you close your eyes, your breathing starting to become slower. Everyone else in the room senses that your life force is fading rather quickly but doesn't utter a word about it.

Solomon notices the sudden weight on his shoulder but doesn't stop. Though, this time, he doesn't deny his tears and lets them flow down his face. When he finally finishes playing your favourite melody, he immediately wraps his arms around your limp body. He places his head on your shoulder and his tears soak your clothes.

Mammon, Leviathan, Asmodeus, Beelzebub and Luke are also crying, knowing that you're now gone. Lord Diavolo, Barbatos, Lucifer, Satan, Belphegor and Simeon only watches from afar, everyone's hearts crushed when you're finally out from your misery but hurts further when they hear the loud, sad and ugly cries from Solomon as he grips onto your body tighter, desperately trying to get you to wake up when you won't.

-END-

I hope you enjoyed this small story. My favourite headcannon of Solomon is that he plays the harp and I had to include that here. Anyway, here’s the song he played.

the first thing you saw when you woke up was what seemed to be the infirmary, what happened..?

your head pounded still, so you didn’t move around too much. You were clearly laid down in of tge beds- you saw that were hooked up to some IV in your arm. carefully you sat up, against the wall behind you. what was this IV..? you couldn’t remember anything, besides passing out that is.

you heard the door open and close, but your eyes were closed as even the mere light from outside didn’t help your headache. you then felt somebody sit on the bed before speaking up.

“the hell were you thinking; pushing your body like that woman?” oh. it was Zoro.

“why would you care?” you groaned, opening your eyes to look at him. he seemed tense, there was eye bags under his eyes, yet he looked moodier than usual.

he glanced at you as he sighed, burying his face in one of his hands as he spoke. “because you’re my crewmate, idiot. you pushed it too far and your body practically gave up, you were out for two days straight.” he explained, you sat there quietly taking in this information.

“thought you’d be happy.” you scoffed, not caring to look at his bewildered expression that sat on his face as you spoke.

pt1

pt2

tags; @ghostfacefricker6969 @jellyslimesofficial

masterlist

it had been a week at this point since hearing Zoro’s conversation with Luffy. As a result you were obviously hurt by what you heard, but chose to put all those emotions into training.

sure, you weren’t as strong as the rest of them, but you still had to try- right?

you sighed. you were currently training in the crows nest while on watch for the night, to be honest you’d been training any time you got the chance- which was always.

you grunted as you lifted some weights. your body ached and was practically screaming for you to take a break but you ignored its protests, pushing through until you physically couldn’t do it anymore.

the weights made a loud crash as they hit the ground of the crows nest- your body following quickly behind as you collapsed onto the floor along with it.

what had happened? you couldn’t tell.

all you knew was your head was pounding on the walls of your skull, you panted as you closed your eyes. your muscles were sore, stiff, aching, all of the overtraining the past few days was hitting you like a rock.

you grunted and moaned in pain before hearing muffled sounds, voices maybe? you couldn’t make them out, before passing out a few seconds later.

pt 1

pt 3

masterlist

the night was dark, yet the moon left you with a perfect amount of light to be able to see in the darkness.

you wanted to grab some water before you headed to bed, but just as you were about to enter the kitchen you froze as you heard Zoro talking with Luffy.

“I just don’t understand why you’d choose her out of everyone from that island, we don’t need somebody like her.”

his words cut like daggers as they hit your ears. he really didn’t want you here?

“Don’t say that! She’s a nice girl and she cleans really good! She might not fight a lot but that doesn’t matter.”

Luffy argued with the other individual, hearing a scoff emit from his mouth at his captains words. You were torn between barging in or running away before the swordsman spoke yet again.

“Exactly, she doesn’t fight. If we get caught up in a serious battle she won’t be able to defend herself, and one of us is going to have to babysit her. It’ll be annoying, and we don’t even need cleaners we have Sanji.”

you didn’t want them to, but tears brimmed your eyes as his words hit you like a train. were you really that useless? he had to babysit you?

numerous thoughts swarmed your mind, Luffy still talking with him but you couldn’t hear him. you thought you had found a place where you meant something after years of being unwelcome and not having anybody, you thought you had a family- but it was clear there was yet another individual who underestimated you.

in your rage and frustrations, you walked away from the kitchen, the moon emitting a shine onto the world below as you leaned over the rail of the Sunny, covering your mouth to conceal your sobs as your heart cried for a sense of belonging, just for once.

pt 2 pt3

masterlist

𝘏𝘰𝘵 𝘚𝘭𝘦𝘦𝘱𝘦𝘳*ੈ༘⋆

proofread:yup

wc:222

WARNINGS:just short cute fluff!

Sleepyhead!Matt who walks around tiredly all day long.mumbling and grumbling about how he can’t wait to go to sleep or till they get home to his only slightly annoyed girlfriend.on days out he would try and not complain as much in order to keep her happy with whatever they were doing but his tiredness was only apparent to everyone.he most definitely has anemia.

Cuddlelover!reader who will take any possible chance she can get to cuddle with Matt.the way their bodies fit together when he spoons her is like two puzzle pieces.it doesn’t matter if it’s in the couch, his bed, a longer chair, she will take whatever opportunity she can to snuggle up to him.the prickly feeling in his stumble nipping at his forehead lightly.

Although you would think this would make bout of their needs be met easily there’s on issue, Matt is hot sleeper.so on those fateful nights where y/n wants nothing more then to snuggle up close to her tired boyfriend, she unfortunately wakes up across the bed with all the blankets and pillows practically shoved onto her.a small smile can’t help but creep onto her face as she looks to her left to see a tranquil Matt, fast asleep comfortably, it’s just unfortunate it’s not with her.

𝘞𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘯 𝘉𝘺 𝘚𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘭𝘶𝘷𝘴𝘹™

𝘗𝘶𝘳𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘙𝘢𝘪𝘯ִִ*ੈ༘⋆

Proofread: mostly Wc:6.3k WARNINGS:Cheating,swearing,smut,piv,oral(m!receiving),getting caught in the act,reader is insecure,SH,use of drugs multiple times,Chris being an asshole kinda(guy logic), just sadness, no happy ending;(

Reader ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

my hands shook as i read the text.it had been sent 30 minutes ago but for some reason every time I re-read it it felt like the first."chris cheated on you"was all it said.it was from his own brother,matthew, so i knew this wasn't some type of sick joke.matt actually always had my back.when guys would make fun of me or people would stare he would try and jump in to tell them to stop.we were never friends, far from that.he was just a nice guy.

tears welled up in my salted eye as I began to type out my response to this shocking information. "What?" was all my fingers could pry themselves to type out.such a simple question with an answer that will unravel the past 5 years of my life of my life.matt began typing again almost as soon as I hit send, this time taking a much longer time.my heart sunk even deeper, if that was even possible at this point, and my stomach twisted into knots that no medicine could undo.

After about 2 minutes his message bubble showed up.i felt nothing short of sick to my stomach as i read it.he had gone to a party and cheated on me with some random slut, and was bragging about it?my head felt as if it would fall off my body at any second.i couldn't believe what i was reading, i didn't want to believe it.

the detailed story made my entire body fill with so many emotions.i began to hyperventilate.breathes quickening by the second.i didn't know what to do.a story with so much detail had no choice but to be true.i didn't want to be in my own skin anymore.i shoved the sleeve of my hoodie up and began to scratch at the skin on my arm harshly.the stinging sensation sending strange tingles to my head.old scars on my wrists sensitive, tender, so breakable.

I soon felt the need to break away.i ripped the hoodie off my body in a weird flailing mess.gripping at chunks of my hair and ripping my headphones out of my now red ears.broken sobs lefty my mouth as I attempted to catch my breath.tears pouring out of me like a fountain.how could he do this to me.after everything he told me?and everything we've been through?

anger began to fill my blood.i started to shake my hands violently.needing to get rid of this tent up anger and sadness smoothie somehow.before i knew it my hand was in my wall.blood trickling down my fist once I removed it from the fresh hole.i then realized what I had to do.My feet hurriedly carried me to the front door.I grabbed my keys somewhere along my journey to the car.puting the key in the ignition and starting my car up.the drive there was a blur.i don't even think I should be driving like this.but who cares? I sure didn't

Chris ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

Blood rushed to my face as i took another shot.i began to feel dizzy as this was my fourth one of the night and tilting my head back wasn’t the best for the state i was in.i let the alcohol burn through my throat like fire as i swallowed. I looked down at my phone unsteadily. I couldn’t help but notice a few missed calls from my girlfriend. I thought nothing of it. Y/n is always clingy anyways.

I mean seriously I go out for one night and she's up my ass. I put my phone on dnd so she cant bother me any longer.This was my night.i was going to have fun whatever way i want, without her.that sounds right.perfect actually.

I shot my head up from my phone as one of my good friends came up to me with a call of my name.it was Jack “hey man” i slurred out as i weakly dabbed up the blonde.he was sweaty and out of breath.I internally cringed as his clammy palm grabbed mine.trying my best to wipe my hand without him noticing.

“Yo, I got two men upstairs waiting if you tryna join?” He asked.i knew what he meant by two man.it definitely didn’t mean double date.i contemplated what I should do, not being able to stop harping back to the missed calls from my girlfriend.i knew it was wrong.i was drunk but not dumb.she loved me, i loved her at one point.this was fucked.everything about what i had been doing behind her back these past few months has been fucked.

I soon found my mouth moving faster than my brain. “Which one is mine?”

Reader ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

It felt like I had just teleported here as I stared at chris' front door.I knocked on it with my good hand.A few seconds later I was met with a confused looking matt. "woah what happened to you?" he asked shocked

I ignored his question entirely.he’s a big boy and thinks he can piece together what happened to me. "your parents home?"I asked.knowing that what I was about to do wasnt something his parents should hear.

"uh no they're.out why are you here?"Matt asked confused and weirded out.i never truly noticed how handsome he was.it might just be my blurry vision though.

"Is Chris home or is he with that slut Stacy?"I snipped at the taller boy.

"nah he actually went out for a few hours, to another party or something." I felt defeated as the words left his mouth. my body didn't even have the strength to support the anger running through my veins as I could only imagine what he was doing at this party.

I needed to get high.That was all I knew how to do In times like this.times when the only things that consumed my thoughts were ones that made me feel as if I wanted the earth to swallow me whole. "You got weed?" I sputtered out as I fought back tears.

Matt was clearly taken aback at my suddenness but nonetheless answered "yea.. come in" he moved aside to let me in. I mumbled a small thanks as I walked past him into the house.

Chris ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

I followed Jack upstairs as he began to describe the girl I would get.she was apparently blonde, short and had a fat ass, perfect. You could see how excited I was by simply looking down at my pants. Hopefully this girl will reciprocate.

Through all my excitement it wasn't hard to find guilt.it lingered in the back of my mind while doing these kinds of things. y/n was probably home, watching some stupid rom-com cuddled up in a blanket all cozy, sad and worried I'm not answering but doing her best to ignore it.that's just how she was.an over thinking anxiety mess that liked to hide it to make herself feel better.i would be lying if i said i didn't find that cute.

As Jack opened the door I was met with two girls waiting for us on the bed.i could spot the blonde immediately seeing as the other had dark coily hair, definitely jack's type. I eagerly made my way over to my girl who I hadn't even learned the name of. She was even more gorgeous then I had imagined.her hair was pin straight and her lips were plump, red.she had blue eyes and the hottest body.

I connected our lips before any words could be spoken.our lips moved perfectly as i undressed her.i paid no mind to what Jack and his girl were doing. All I care about is her. All I want is her. Her soft lips made my fingers tingle as I touched her bare skin.feeling like my fingers were on fire as they roughly brushed over every part of her.

She then flipped us over so she was on top of me. As I felt her clothed wetness with my fingers I couldn’t help but remember my girlfriend.she was probably at home right now, wondering where I am and what I’m doing and why I’m not answering, slowly getting more upset by the second.I brushed off the thought as the blonde on top of me took off her panties and began to position herself on top of my face.I was in perfect view of her pussy.everything a guy could dream of. Shaved, pink, tiny, perfect.

Something still felt so wrong.I had cheated on y/n plenty of times, why does now feel different? Before my thoughts could continue I felt my phone buzz in my back pocket.I know this is wrong.I need to leave.then without saying anything I got her off of me and left the room.Jack didn’t seem to say anything but she was throwing confused obscenities at me as I walked out.

Reader ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

My giggles were uncontainable as me and Matt cracked jokes across from each other on our comfortable spot on the floor. The music in the background paired with the purple led lights added an ambience to the room that couldn't be replicated. as the laughs died down the reality of my entire relationship set into my heart. I had been lied to by the one person who saw me for me.the one person to ever treat me right, buy me flowers, take me shopping, buy me food, listen to me talk about random stuff, stay on the phone with me almost every night until I fell asleep, was gone. I don't want this change. it wasn't one I could handle in my heart that had already grown as heavy as tons.

without thinking as soon as the tears began to spring out of my eyes I hugged matt.it was a little awake since we were on the floor after but it didn't matter.we sat there for some time.just holding each other as I cried into his chest.he was just so comfortable to be around, I couldn’t help but melt into him.before I could catch my own body I found my lips on his.I don’t know how it happened but it did.it felt right yet wrong.perfect yet oh so messed up.

We kisses sloppily as we were still high as shit.I slowly climbed on top of Matt which made me break the kiss for a moment.I took the second to stare deep into his hooded eyes.every detail of his face sinking into my eyes.a cheeky smile was plastered on his face and it was in this moment that i realized, he was the one.

I hurriedly kissed him again and began to remove my top as he did the same for himself.toned body all in view.my world felt like it was spinning as I tired to unclasp my bra while giggling.our tongues messily fought through laughs and desire.I felt so light yet so grounded at the same time.as if our bodies were morphing together.

We wasted no time taking all of our clothes off, both of us now completely naked on top of each other on his bedroom floor.

Chris ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

I barely shuffled past the crowd of drunken young adults as I made my way to the door and eventually my car.my eyes darken with anger at myself, hurting the only girl I've ever loved? who the fuck am I?I feel guilt wash over me as I realize how many time I had already done this. The number was truly lost on me as this normally happened when I was blackout drunk but it had to be around 10 now.

I put the keys in the ignition and started the car.my fists feel like they might explode if I didn't hit something now.i restrain myself hesitantly.scared that if I hit something I won't be able to stop. I quickly started driving.i shouldn't be driving in this condition. I'm drunk, tired, guilty and blinded with self directed rage.i couldn't stop my mind from wandering to her. no matter how much I tired to stop, how much I wanted to stop, I couldn't.everything led back to her.every color reminded me of a shirt she had.every song she had sang.every friend was one of hers.she owned every aspect of my mind.

______ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

y/n was far from gorgeous in her own eyes.yes her friends often said she was beautiful and stunning but she never saw it. and even when she did think she looked cute even no man ever did, at least not one that wasn't family.no matter how much makeup she caked onto her face in the mornings, or how many skincare products burned through her childlike skin, she never had received a compliment from another guy.

because of this she never left the house without a full face of makeup on.if anyone dared to rush her through her 12 step makeup routine she would scream and cry till they left her alone.she couldn't be seen without it.she was also always putting herself in clothes that were meant to make her body "look good". Although it only worked occasionally she continued to wear them.short crop tops with her boobs hanging out the top and the tightest leggings known to man.Some would say she was a slut, others could tell she was just hurting.She wanted to be wanted.

this was her life style until she hit junior year of high school.she had gotten so tired of trying to be the most gorgeous girl by mens standards that she simply stopped.she threw away all her makeup and burned her slutty outfits to the ground.replacing them with large baggy jeans, hoodies and random tee shirt.she would barely style her hair anymore and only at special times wore mascara.she was the polar opposite of who she used to be.she didn't even know the girl she was before.

along with this major change in looks came a major change in mind.she now envied her friends even more.seeing them have guys hit on them and ask them out constantly made her livid.sometimes when she would go out with some her friends people would stop and stare.as if she was some sort of museum exhibit "complete ugly loser hanging out with pretty girls" and she was on display like a taxidermied shark.nobody really wondering who she is or what she does to look the way she does, just how the hell did she get here.

this jealousy soon turned into self isolation.she kept herself away from her friends.she was silent whenever she had to be around them in class.no longer being interested in drama or who asked out who that week.music playing in her ears with or without headphones.she no longer participated in conversations.only sitting there and half listening.she had become a shell of the girl she once was.and for some reason she enjoyed it.noboyd noticed her.she could dig a blade as deep into her skin as she wanted to and nobody would give a fuck.her tainted blood could drip down and stain the shirt she wore to school the next day and nobody would say anything.they wouldnt notice

Her friends didn't notice her silence.only thinking it was some strange phase she was going through because well, they were teenagers, things like this would happen.over time the loneliness became too much for her causing her to attempt to migrate back to her previous friend group.fortunately they accepted her back with open arms.

then, one fateful day in a boring science class.the teacher announced that they were switching their seats to lab tables now that they were halfway through the year girls who had sat together all year were understandably sad but nobody’s emotions compared to y/n's.she hadn't felt this nervous in a long time.and it felt disgusting.

her leg bounced up and down seeing as there were only 2 more lab tables left and her name, along with 7 others, hadn't been called. all her friends were already separated so she really had no chance. "ok lab table 5 is gonna be... anita, chris, y/n and Issac." the teacher announced.

her stomach dropped at the names.not one but two boys at her table.this was a nightmare for her .whenever she sat with boys in the past they were sure to make fun of her till she wanted to crawl into whatever shirt she was wearing and never come out.she grabbed her stuff and situated herself in the small chair. Chris across from her, Antia next to him and Issac next to y/n. she kept her head down, not wanting to even look any of these people in the eye.

"Alright so I know you guys have been sitting with completely different people the whole year so take the rest of the period to talk with the people you're with and get to know them." Ms.Kratsteen stated. Anita and Issac sparked up a conversation immediately. They most likely were friends before this.

Chris looked around awkwardly before breaking the silence between the two. "So y/n, you're pretty different from last year." he said, causing y/n to look up slowly. the look on her face almost saying 'wtf'. "not like in a bad way, you still look pretty cool." he backtracked.

"thanks?you look...well the same,"the flushed girl said.making herself let out a soft laugh.he laughed lightly along with her.

Once the laughter died down Chris spoke again"yeah, its harder to change your style as a guy then you would think" he chuckled at his own words.large hands moving to rub his chin momentarily.She couldn’t help but giggle at his words as well.not that it was all that funny but just simply because the way his thin pink lips maneuvered into a sly smile was one that made her all giddy.like butterflies were bubbling inside her stomach as she stared at him intently.this strange, unfamiliar feeling, felt nice.for the first time in a while,she felt nice.

“Hey, how about you come over to mine after school?you can give me some fashion tips” he said half jokingly, not fully expecting her to say yes.but to his surprise she agreed.it was hard to ignore how she blushed deeply, he could practically hear her heart beating out of her chest, or possibly that was his own beat he was listening to.

______ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

The mood of the room was calm.Chris and y/n took turns passing the pen to each other as they sat in the seemingly silent room.the soft sound of a random The Cure song played in their ears.the noise drifting in and over their heads while the room filled with smoke.

Y/n look over to her left on the bed at Chris, red hooded eyes drifting over to his relaxed body.no words came from her mouth although she wanted them to.her mouth was agape, words just at the brim of being uttered.but for reasons out of her control they stayed locked behind her teeth.refusing to spill over which only filled her head which curiosity as to what they could be.

Chris noticed her gaze after a moment.lowly lidded eyes locking with hers.his words came out fast.not stopping themselves at the brim like hers had. “I didn’t know you smoked…” he practically mumbled.

It took her a moment to gather what to say.she never really did, not often at least.due to this the amount of weed she was intaking at the moment made her all the more out of it then normal. “I…I don’t really…only when I’m sad…” she answered at the same volume of Chris’ voice.

The distance between them felt as if it was growing larger as she stared at him from the head of her bed.back lazily rested on a large pillow as he does the same on the other side of the bed.her hand practically moves in slow motion as she reaches to grab her soda from the nightstand.her body was slothily moving as she unscrewed the top and took a sip.letting the sugary drink sit in her mouth before swallowing.

It seemed as if in the blink of an eye Chris was closer to her.like he had teleported closer. “C’mere…” he said quietly under his breath.Yet somehow the words flowed right into her ears making them ring.

She set down her drink again and crawled over to him on the bed slowly.plopping her body down next to his after not very long seeing as they were very far apart anymore.without saying anything Chris took another hit of the pen.confusion etched on her face as she watched him.

Before she could form a coherent thought two of his slender fingers were on her chin.hypnotically pulling her closer making her lips part mindlessly.their open lips collided messily.hot smoke blowing into her mouth making her throat burn.she blew the smoke back out after holding it in her mouth again.

She stared at him somehow blankly.blinking as she tried to process what had happened, yet also slowly forgetting it completely. He stared back at her.not an ounce of nervousness available to him as he gazed into her sinking eyes.

“Again…” she uttered weakly.not exactly knowing where the words or let alone the thought came from to begin with.he chuckled lowly before doing as she said.pulling her close and placing his lips on hers again.their tongues slowly fought for dominance, messy spit pooling together as their eyes closed, all the while deepening the needy kiss.

They were friends, nothing more.honestly it had never been a realistic thought to be anything more.but right now she felt like she had been with him for years.like she had seen every part of him.as if she knew every story he had to tell. She felt like she loved him.

______ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

Chris and y/n laid in bed somberly.they weren't necessarily going to sleep but it was definitely calm.y/n was slightly tapped into a random movie on his tv while he sat on his side scrolling through his phone mindlessly.

It was a nice summer night.the room they were in was extremely stuffy causing y/n to not wear a hoodie like she normally does at night.leaving her scars out In the open.she didn't mind that chris could see her scars as she knew he wouldn't mention them.sometimes she questioned if he even noticed them.she had never caught him stealing glances at them or looking at them with fascination like she had with others.and I mean yea chris could be a bit of a space cadet at times but he wasn't completely braindead.

yet the question lingered in her mind.was that the only reason he had stayed with her so long. cause he didn't think she had gone that far?if he found out, would he be disgusted? as these thoughts raced through her mind a mile a minute she found herself simultaneously pulling the blanket over her wrists.

chris, unlike she had thought, noticed this.he noticed everything about her.he noticed how her face wrinkles like a cat everytime she about to sneeze.and how she ties her shoes into butterfly's cause it's cuter.or how she knows where everyone one of her stuffed animals came from.and unfortunately for y/n, he noticed this small action.it was one so small, so miniscule, that anyone else could have and would have  missed it.but not him.not when it came down to her.

he knew what she was covering.it hurt him to know why she was pulling the blanket over herself and why her face suddenly seemed to have changed ever so slightly.he sat up lazily to be at her level. "baby..." he mumbled.the words felt strange as they ringed in her ears.it was the first time he had ever called her any type of pet name as he stated many times he hated names like that.

she turned her head to him attentively. "what's up?" she tired to act nonchalant even though she was internally fucking dying at the name he had called her in his low, stuffy, tired voice.her eyes scanned over his face for the millionth time.never being able to get fully used to the beauty he held.he could say the same about her with ease, yet he never would, not unprovoked at least.

The next words weren’t what she had expected.she thought he would want to change the movie or that he wants to go to sleep. He sputtered for a moment, trying to find the right words before speaking up. “They don’t bother me, you're beautiful to me no matter what” was all he said.no more, no less, it was perfect.just like every other word he had ever had the privilege of saying to her.

______ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

her resting was peaceful as she lay in her boyfriends arms.it was the morning of her birthday but it was still fairly early for her,8:00 to be exact.soft breaths came in and out of her nose sequentially as her resting eyelids stayed shut.the tranquility she felt was unmatched as she slept.

chris on the other had wasn't as much of a peaceful sleeper.he was practically snoring in her ear as his head rested messily in the crook of her neck that had stayed open through the night, unmoving, subconsciously scared to wake chris up.his legs were sprawled out as the only thing in order were his arms around her.despite the disheveled state he was in he was calm, something which was rare for him.

this moment. one so delicate that it should be treated as porcelain, was dropped from a 1,000 foot tall building as his brothers came barging into the room with a large camera and smiling faces. "HAPPY BIRTHDAY!' they shouted in unison, causing y/n to shoot up from her sleep startled, leaving a confused and sleepy chris to roll over onto his back, rubbing his eye as he tried to figure out what the hell was going on.

once her eyes adjusted to the sight in front of her she grumble a quick "what..." as she had totally forgotten it was he birthday.she didn't even bother to fix her messed up hair or the chaoticness of her outfit as she was right on camera.a small part of her knew this would be on YouTube later that night but was far too tired to do anything about it.

"Happy birthday!" Nick shouted again from behind the camera.now reminding y/n what day it was.she yawned before looking over to chris next to her.he was sleepily grinning ear to ear as he was happy his brothers were celebrating her as well.

Before she could think Nick was grabbing her by the hand and pulling her into the kitchen, passing the camera to Matt somewhere along the way as he led her up the stairs to the island in the middle of the kitchen.chris was groggily following behind.

her eyes lit up as she saw the cake they had bought for her.it was custom made to have pictures of her and her friends on the top and all sorts of things that she liked on the sides such as her favorite artists, books and movie.the cake was y/f/c and large and heart shaped.it was perfectly adorned with a white frosting edge and must've cost at least $200.

she picked her head up, tears in her eyes as she looked at her three favorite people surrounding her. Matt smiled cheekily from behind the camera before speaking up. "Do you like it?" he asked even though the answer was obvious.

"i...I love it..." she practically whispered before noticing chris walking off back to his room.she didn't question it as maybe he wanted to fix his hair or put on a shirt on for the camera.while they waited for chris to come back she hugged the two brothers who watched her gleaming face with pride.before she could notice nick pulled a bag from behind the island

He held the pink bag out to her. "here" he said with a grin on his face.she took the bag and set it on the table and took out the tissue paper.her smile lit up even more if it was even possible as she picked up the gift.it was a small collage book.she only grew happier as she flipped through the pages.they were filled with nothing but amazing memories from her entire life.it was impossible to not cringe and laugh as she found middle school photos. showing them to the camera as they all laughed.

It was strange how Chris hadn't come back yet but she assumed he was doing something important down there.matt set the camera down on its stand as he grabbed his gift from his side.setting the black and white bag on the table in front of her. she smiled at him before opening the bag and pulling out the penguin stuffed animal he had gotten her.it was tiny and super soft an the perfect thing for her desk.she took a look at the tag and saw that the plushie had a name tag.slipping over the name tag she saw the penguin had the same name as her.

she looked up with a warm smile. "thanks matt" she hugged him sweetly before nothing chris coming up the stairs again.his arms were held behind his back as he walked up to her.once he stood in front of her he pulled out a sleek black and gold box from behind him.her eyes trailed over the box anxiously as she could tell from just the box that whatever it was was expensive.

She shakily took the box from his hand and opened it to find a silver ring.it was simple and had small diamonds on the sides of it.she put her hand over her mouth in disbelief as she looked at the ring. "I'm not proposing or nothin’...just a promise ring" chris said as he watched her stare at the ring in awe.without saying anything she set it down and hugged him passionately.

"Thank you baby..." she whispered into his neck.although he hated corny pet names he didn't protest.only hugging her back with a smile on his face.simply happy he could make her this happy.

Reader ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

His dick sprung lit of his pants as i pulled down his boxers.everything moving so lustfully slow yet hungrily fast at once.the world was spinning around us and I was so here for it.i wasted no time working my mouths way down to his cock.i didn’t hesitate to deep throat him.his length not fully registering in my head until they had connected.gagging almost immediately. He was bigger than Chris that was for sure.

I bobbed my head up and down quicker each time I came up.air was secondary to his pleasure.his hands somehow found their way to my head and began to touch me down further on his cock. Beautiful moans and whines escaped his pink lips. I looked up at him through my lashes to the best of my abilities and he looked gorgeous.hooded eyes looking as desperate as ever.i loved it.i wanted to soak up all of his being.

His beauty made me work faster.i felt my pussy ache for some sort of attention but I couldn’t bother.i was so locked on his face that my own pleasure was trivial.without warning Matt let out an estranged moan as he came down my throat.not even giving me an option to spit.

Before I could think for myself Matt sat up and grabbed me, bringing us to his bed in order to be more comfortable. Without words he liked his cock up with my soft entrance and pushed into me.a loud moan eliciting from my throat as he did so.he large man began to move fast and hard.having no mercy against me and my sensitive body.

My moans were utterly uncontrollable.only getting louder by the second.thank God nobody else was home. “You love this cock.don’t you slut?” He spat. The temporary pleasure was overwhelming to say the least.I felt so euphoric yet so dazed at once. my body couldn't seem to choose whether to moan out my pleasure or let it all rush to my brain which was already beginning to become fuzzy. "answer me." he sternly commanded.

I felt my body get hotter by the second as I tried answering him. "yes..I love it..so much.."I sputtered out. my eyes rolled back as he continued to drill into me relentlessly.my eyes that refused to open fully rolled into the back of my head as he kept the same fast rough pace, tattooed arms holding my hips in place in a way so brutal that I feared he would crush them.

Chris ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

time felt as if it had skipped as I was suddenly home in the blink of an eye.lost in my thoughts of her, only her.i huffed as I opened the front door.stumbling into my house cause the alcohol was very much still in my system.my struggling emotions were sobering me up somewhat but that didn't help my sluggish movement.

once I had hobbled over to the island that lay in the center of the kitchen I put my head in my hands.leaning over the counter with pure exhaustion.i let out a deep sigh.i had fucked up, bad.i cheated on the only girl i've ever truly loved, the only girl to ever truly love me back.what the hell was i thinking?

Slowly i pick my body up.walking over to the fridge to grab some sort of drink.for the first time in my life i wouldn't mind drinking water if it meant getting the foul taste of the blonde from earlier out of my mouth.luckily for me there was some lemonade left which i quickly grabbed a can on and sung my head back to drink.desperate for some sort of way to wash this feeling off myself.

I set the metal can down on the counter with a clink. letting out a breath i hadn't known i was holding in.my gray hoodie which was lined with fur on the inside suddenly felt suffocating.like as if i couldn't breathe with it on.but i didn't remove it as it was the closest thing to comfort i had right now.my eye rake over to the front door where i see matts keyes sitting on the holder.

Without a second thought I turned my body and head to Matt's room.not fully noticing the loud music.he would know what to do, how to handle this.even if he didn't i really just needed my older brother right now.

My hands were steady as they gripped the doorknob.opening his creaky white door slowly due to me still being absolutely wasted.i kept my head down.afraid to look him in the eye while i explained what i had done out of shame.

Reader ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

my body felt like it was going to go into overdrive as he kept his riotous pace the whole time, not slowing down to give me a moment to breathe once. "hey matt I really fucked up and-" chris started as he opened the door, looking for comfort from his brother for something.matt who was still high as ever didn't even notice this

I hear the creak of the door and immediately attempt to freeze. “Shit…Matt stop— oh fuck…mph.” I babble in attempt to get him to stop.i weakly prop myself up on my elbows to see who it was.through the bliss of getting fucked dumb I could see it was Chris standing in the doorway.despite what I was aware him doing I felt awful he had to see this.I continue to try and pry matt out of me. “Matt stop…Chris’ here.” I slur as the weight of the situation slowly sobers me up.

I watch as Matt pulls out of me hesitantly and turns to look at Chris. I'm the doorway.I knew it was the weed making him act so nonchalant.if we were sober he would’ve jumped out of his skin at the slightest sound of the door creaking. “Oh shittt” he muttered as he lay next to me, propped up on his elbows.I hadn't even noticed he crashed down next to me

“What the fuck…”Chris uttered under his alcohol infused breath.the gleam of the purple lights mixed with the effects of the weed were making it hard me to make out the details of what exactly was in-front of me but I swear I could see his eyes well with tears.

𝘞𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘯 𝘉𝘺 𝘚𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘭𝘶𝘷𝘴𝘹™

⋆༺𓆩☠︎︎𝙒𝙚𝙡𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙚☠︎︎𓆪༻⋆

welcome to my blog! here are the links to whatever you might be looking for

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★𝐈𝐧𝐭𝐨𝐱𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠

𝐂𝐡𝐫𝐢𝐬 𝐬𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐨𝐥𝐨 𝐱 𝐟𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

proofread: yeaaa

word count:4k(lol plz send help)

WARNINGS: pt2 of jealous girl, toxic!Chris, smut but like for the plot yk, p in v, dick suckin, unprotected sex (safe sex is great sex kids😁👍), praise and degrading, crying, mentions of possible cheating, reader talks about being insecure, swearing, pet names, reader is def not standing on business.

A/N:here u gooo @urfavstromboli !this is too long holy shit.the smut part was so strange to write bc like I don't really like writing smut but I had to for like the story.also im sorry this took so long to makes started working on it right after pt1 and just forgot it was in my drafts LMAOOOO. also peep the special banner(I couldn't find any good lyrics).ok ill stop yappin and let you read.

𖦹 𖦹

✧SATURDAY

my heart beat sped up as I slammed the door in Chris' face.never being this upset with him in my life. I mean I never really thought he would choose another girl over me.Especially not one that has problems with me for no apparent reason. As I broke down into sobs I pulled out my phone and ironically called Nick, Chris' brother, knowing he would comfort me.

"Hey what's up?Did Chris apologize?" Nick asked through the phone.Once my crying was heard I think he got the hint of what had happened though.

"Can you uh..can you come over please really just... need someone right now."I stifled out as I paced around my living room.too many yet not enough thoughts running through my head.

"yea of course, do you want me to grab anything on the way?"Nick questioned sympathetically. I only responded with a small 'the usual' before we promptly said goodbye and I hung up.

✧NICKS POV

I heard the front door open as I shuffled down the stairs,Chris huffing and puffing as he stepped into my view. "How'd it go?"I asked even though I already knew how it went.I wanted to see if he would lie to me.

"horrible, its not even my fault though, shes acting like an insane bitch and is trying to make me choose between her and ash.fucking stupid.she needs to get over herself." Chris spat out.i was shock at his words about a girl who he used to love so much.the only time he talked about her behind her back was when he was saying how pretty she looked or how kind she way or how funny she could be.all of those feeling were now replaced by cold, rude, bullshit.

"don't talk about her like that, dickhead." I retorted.yes he's my brother and I'll love him no matter what but there is no way I would let him talk about her in such a way.especially when I knew that wasn't what he was like at all.

"what?! How am I the dickhead?" he yelled out as I turned my body to Matt's room in order to ask if he could drive me to y/n's.rolling my eyes and choosing to ignore the boy who had very clearly lost it.

"Can you drive me to y/n's?"I asked while poking my head into Matt's dark room. a small 'yea sure' being the answer as he got up from his desk.walking back into the kitchen area I was met with an angered Chris. God he was acting like such a child.

"don't ignore me,"he slightly shouted. "If I'm really a dick then there must be a reason!" my youngest brother said, looking at me soullessly.

"you literally were flirting with Ashley the other day, didn't  say anything when she insulted your girlfriend, when y/n confronted you about it you don't even care, and then when she asked you to make the very reasonable decision of either her or Ashley you get all pissed and start calling her an insane bitch, so yea I think that makes you a dick."I rambled on frustrated.

Chris didn't say anything before I walked toward the front door.or maybe he was going to but just didn't because of the situation.either way I don't think he really needed to say anything else.as I was getting my shoes on I could faintly hear Matt say "I know your my brother but if you hurt her anymore after today I'll kick your ass." which was followed up by my silence and footsteps towards Chris' room.

Matt huffed as he walked down the stairs and walked out the door to his car with me.Once we got in the car we both sighed deeply. "He's so stupid sometimes."Matt breathed out as he started the car and began to back out of the driveway.

"seriously, also we need to stop by the gas station."I replied.even though I was going to her house in order to comfort her and hopefully make her realize he's not treating her well and that she should just leave I know it would be to no avail.shes a hopeless romantic and there not much I can do about it.

✧YOUR POV

tears sprung out of my eyes like frogs with no hesitation. “Please please please let me get what I want” by deftones playing on my speaker. I looked into the mirror across from my bed as I laid on my side, locking eyes with my own reflection.I slowly picked my body up and now simply sat on my bed.still staring at myself intently.

I found myself simultaneously messing with different parts of my body and face.silently wishing they would morph to look like Ashley.she was perfect.the perfect weight,perfect skin,flawless makeup, model like hair.no wonder why Chris didn't mind her being on top of him.he probably wanted people to think that was his girlfriend.not me.why would anyone wanna be seen with me anyways.

The doorbell ringing for the second time this night broke me out of my thoughts.I slowly brought myself to my feet and dragged myself to the front door.as I opened It I was met with a sympathetic looking Nick holding a gray bag. "hey girl..."he slowly said.

I'm not sure if it was just my brain trying to distract me or what but I couldn't help but notice he had dyed his hair red again. "your hair...its not blonde anymore..."I quietly said.my words making Nick smile

"Yeah I know, just kinda felt like another change, i don't know.do you like it?"he questioned.

"I love it, looks really cool man.''I answered, tired eyes looking at him and realizing he was still outside. "oh shit sorry"I said while moving out of the way. as he stepped into my house I made eye contact with Matt who had most likely been waiting for Nick to go into my house.I waved to him with a small smile as he reciprocated through his car window.

I sighed heavily as I shut the door.remembering what happened earlier. "Okay so I got you red bull, skinny pop, oreos, mints and Lindt chocolate, oh and I got nerds for myself, you can have some though."Nick said once he walked over to my kitchen table, placing the items on said table as he listed them.I don't know how he remembers what I like to eat when I'm sad but this does happen a lot I guess.

I put my head in my hands and let out a deep breath.trying to unwind somehow.a ping was then heard from across the table.i knew it was Nick because my phone had been left upstairs. "Oh God, look who it is."Nick said as he turned his phone to face me. it was Ashley.she had sent him something on snap.

'half swipe it."I said as I made my way around the table, peering over his shoulder to see his screen.

"I don't know how."he responded, panicking.

"Just pull it from the left." I tried to explain.my help wasn't very useful though because he opened it instead. 'Are you mad at me?' read the message "is she fucking stupid.of course your mad at her?"

"She is stupid, that's why she looks like that.im just gonna say no to see what she says."the boy next to me said as he typed out 'no' followed up by 'why would I be mad at you?'.

she immediately opened the message and began typing "wow I'm surprised she opened that fast, probably cause she has no life."I snakily said as we both watched her bitmoji type.

''Oh bc of what happened with y/n the other day. 'she clarified. He was about to start typing again before she beat him to it. 'yk when she was a psycho bitch for no reason' was the next message. "psycho bitch?!oh I'll show her a psycho bitch!"I said as I shot up from my leaned over position on the counter. walking angrily towards my front door.

"y/n you are not going to fight her right now, especially not when you look like that.'' Nick reasoned as he set his phone down. "just forget about her.she's just an irrelevant cunt that has nothing better to do with her life but hate." the red-head said.

he was right.i don't know why I cared what she thought.but when I really think about it,I don't.i couldn't give less then a fuck about how she saw me.it was Chris' opinion I cared about.i wanted him to think I was beautiful, funny and kind.i wanted him to think i was perfect.i wanted him to be able to see me over Ashely.

"did Chris say anything about me?"I asked.switching topics to something more relevant in my head. The face he made when I said this made my stomach drop.Mainly because I knew how mean Chris could get at times and considering what had happened earlier tonight I don't think he said anything good.

"Do you want what he should've said or what he did say?"he asked as I made my way back to my previous placement.

"Tell me what he actually said."I answered.feeling like I was taking a leap of faith.but I knew if I wasn't told the truth then I would never have a chance of getting over this man.

"he was all like 'it went horrible, it’s not even my fault though, she’s being an inane bitch and is trying to make me choose between her and ash.she needs to get over herself.'"Nick said, mimicking Chris' voice to make it more light hearted.it was a little funny but the words made my eyes well up with tears nonetheless.

I was feeling so many different things.sadness, anger, stress but most of all betrayal.i mean he said it wasn't even his fault basically saying it was mine.my fault for being upset for a little bit.he would rather call me an insane bitch then just admit he was wrong and stop being friends with Ashley.that fat pig.

"what!?Ugh I hate him so much!!Why do I even like him?He treats me like shit,never listens and is always on top of other girls?!I don't even think I've heard him say he loves me in like 3 months!? do you think he's cheating?oh my God he probably is!"I rambled on.placing my head in my arms at the end of my words.i slowly began to sob into my own arms.once Nick heard my sobs he hugged my hunched over back.

"no don't say that.he's obviously not cheating on you."he reassured.his words didn't do much though because my cries only got louder and more emotional.my best friend ushered me up so he could hug me normally.i pulled away from the hug  once I was able to actually breath.looking up at Nick with tired, sad,eyes.thankful for him being here but also embarrassed for crying over his brother. "wanna watch a movie?" the boy sympathetically asked.i nodded a small yes before I grabbed all my snacks and headed over to the couch.

watching the movie was a good distraction for some time.but nonetheless I found myself thinking of him. how much I missed him and just wishing he was here right now.im not going to apologize though.I did nothing wrong no matter what he thinks.so if that means that we never speak again then I'm fine with that.oh who am I kidding, I'm definitely not fine with that.

✧THE NEXT DAY, SUNDAY

'come over please' and 'I miss you' were the two messages I had been staring at for at least five minutes.the sender being chris made this all the more strange and confusing.i mean he was just calling me an insane bitch yesterday and now he wants me to come over.but for some reason I caved.maybe he wanted to apologize or something.

I threw a zip up over my lace tank top and tied my gray sweatpants.sliding my crocs on as I stepped outside started walking to my car.

Once I began driving I found myself more fidgety in anticipation than what felt like ever before.fingers tapping against the steering wheel rhythmically and constant glancing at the ETA were I knew this.

As I entered the house using my key I felt anxiety rush over me.Matts keys weren't here and neither was Nick's jacket which he never leaves the house without during this time of the year.meaning that it was only the two of us in this house.

My footsteps felt heavy as I walked down to his room.something I had done many times now feeling unfamiliar.I knocked on his bedroom door lightly once I approached it. though as the door was opened I wasn't even aloud a greeting before he placed his hands on my hips and smashed his lips onto mine hungrily.i wish I could say I rejected the kiss but I couldn't.it was like he had put a spell on me.

he walked backwards as we eventually crashed onto his bed.i straddled over his lap as I deepened kiss.he swiftly flipped me over onto my back and moved me so I was sat up a little.i took the hint and unzipped my hoodie, throwing it off to the side while trying my best not to break the kiss.

he then removed my tank top.now revealing my bare chest to him "no bra huh?so you are still my slut." he said as a smirk formed on his lips.

"I was actually about to go to bed but whatever you wanna believe."I retorted.

"do you want me to fuck you or not?"he questioned, looking into my eyes.i stayed silent though.letting the wetness between my legs make my decisions. "that's what I thought."he darkly said. pale arms taking his own shirt off.toned body now all in view for me.

"you know what to do.''was my signal to take my pants off.i undid the tie on my sweats and slid them off.leaving my white laced panties on. "sit up and go on the side of the bed"he demanded.i did as he said.sitting on my knees a on the side of the bed I was closer to.he then came around to the side I was facing.once he was directly in front of me he dropped his baggy jeans and boxers at once, cock springing free.all 8 inches now stood in front of me.his pink tip leaking pre-cum.

I looked up at him innocently.as if I had never done this before.i then, on instinct, began to pump him with my hand slowly.my actions making his breath hitch.i placed my lips on the tip and began to lower my head.pace increasing every time I brought my head up.eventually his hands made their way to my hair and began to push my head into his cock roughly. "fuck just like that.keep going.use that perfect little mouth for something good for once."he harshly spat out looking down at me as he said that.i ignored his words though and continued to suck him off.

This feeling being lost on me for almost a week made my throat sting pleasurably.his grip on my hair tightened which told he was close.the signal making me go faster.if even possible.small whimpers fell from his cherry lips as I continued to work. “Oh God yes,please I’m…I’m almost there”he mumbled out, the words working as encouragement for me to keep going.then without warning I felt his cum shoot itself into my mouth.the salty savory flavor touched my taste buds as I swallowed.

Once he came down from his own high he looked down at me.i kept my eyes on his.looking up like a lost puppy. "fuck your so hot" he said as he grabbed my middle area and situated me on my back and so I was on his bed longways.once he laid down with me he whispered "sit on my lap baby"

I complied and did as he said.placing myself more on his legs then his actual lap because I knew he wouldn't be that easy. "you want me to fuck you?"he asked.i nodded 'yes' in response. looking down at him with pleading eyes even though I was on top right now. "use your words.you had so much to say before, what happened to that?"he teased.

"please chris just fuck me, ive been waiting for days!"I squealed out.thankful there was nobody else home right now. 

"good girl.."he hissed out.his words being my command to lift my hips up and hover over his cock.then without warning he thrusted up into me after lining himself up with my entrance.the sudden feeling making me yelp.he continued to buck his hips up into mine as I bounced simultaneously, placing my fingertips on his chest for some sort of stabilization.

moans that were higher pitched than my actual voice spilled out of my mouth along with swears and small pleads.my body was hot as I went up and down on him.his hands were at my waist, guiding my every move harshly. The pale boy grabbed my waist hard, making me wince at the pleasure mixed with pain.the idea that the boy who I was crying over last night was ramming himself into me right now made me feel guilty.but I can't help it.his touch is intoxicating.

my jaw fell open as pornographic noises flowed from my lips.eyes screwing shut and head being now hung low.i was so caught up in myself that I didn't even register the small whimpers coming from the boy underneath me. The noises being my key to realize he really did miss me.at least a part of me. "keep going baby, don't stop, i'm gonna-"I rambled on before being cut off by my own already familiar noises

"Me too..shit.."he whispered.

"chris fuck fuck fuuuuck"I strung out as I came undone on top of him.laying my body on his as he thrusted up into me again,chasing his own high. Whiny whimpers made their way into my ear as I felt him twitch inside of me.knowing he was close I decided to tease him a little by kissing his neck and leaving a trail of hickeys.my sensitive body not mattering at all to either of us.

"fuck baby" he groaned out as I felt his load shoot into me, coating my insides.we sat there in silence.sweaty bodies catching their breath.once we calmed ourselves he pulled me off him and situated me so I was laying on my side, facing the boy who replicated my current position."lemme get you a towel."he said before promptly getting up, putting his boxers on, and doing as he said.

When he came back and cleaned me up I couldn't help but stare at him.all his features slithering into my eyes. "Can I have a shirt?"I asked softy.not wanting to put my tank top back on because of the temperature.he only hummed an ‘mhm’ before tossing me a random black shirt with a white design on it.

"Can we talk? ''he awkwardly said as we both were now sat up and at least partially clothed. I nodded my head to signify I was listening."listen y/n im...im really sorry about earlier.i was a dick and I shouldn't have acted like that.i know you don't like Ashley and i'm totally fine with dropping her.i would rather lose her then you any day and i'm so sorry if I made you feel otherwise.a-and if your ever upset again don't be afraid to say something cause I promise I won't act like a dick again."he nervously rambled on.

I wish I had it in me to stay mad at him but I couldn't.i know this apology was just so I wouldn't leave him lonely and he would pull something stupid in a few weeks.but I can't help it.i'm in love with him and there's nothing I can do about it.

✧MONDAY MORNING

my eyes screwed shut almost immediately after they fluttered open, the bright sunlight causing this.i turned my head around to the best of my abilities to see if chris was awake and it didn't seem like it. I turned my head back and let out a breath I didn't know I was holding in. "you're finally awake."Chris said from behind me,startling me a little.

I hummed a small 'mhm' before trying to get up but to my dismay he pulled me back down to my previous spot. "I have to pee."I giggled.

"pee later"he mumbled, pulling me closer if possible.

"yea no thank you"I said before breaking out of his limp arms grasp and standing up to go to the bathroom.taking a mental note of my sore legs from last night.

"I see you limping!"he teased once I got into the bathroom.

"oh fuck off"I lightly shouted back.once I washed my hands I began walking towards his door, the idea of food in mind.

"Where are you going?"he asked from his now sat up place.holding himself up on his elbows.

"I'm hungry"I said while throwing on my sweatpants that had been tossed here last night.

When I got up the stairs Nick turned his head to me.shock and disappointment coated his face. "Okay I thought we agreed you hated him?"he questioned.Keeping his voice low knowing Chris was still in the house.

"ugh I know but he texted me last night and told me to come over and then one thing led to another and...look he apologized."I tried to reason.nick though, was not having any of this.i made my way over to the fridge and grabbed my strawberry smoothie from Thursday that had been left here by accident.Taking a sip from it while I turned around to face my best friend again.

"yea and he apologized last time, and the time before that, and the time before that.you have to let him go y/n.he's not good for you."Nick explained to me.I know he was right but I couldn't just get over him.I wasn't the type of person to just get over stuff like that.

"Well last night seemed genuine, okay?I seriously think he meant it.''I said before footsteps were heard coming from chris' bedroom which ended me and Nick's conversation.

Chris hugged me from behind and kissed the top of my head.nick shot me a "you need help" look and I couldn't do much besides give him a "yea I know" look back.the brothers began conversing but it was more like background music to me.

I know nick is right, he’s not good for me.but I can't help it.everytime I look into his eyes I feel like i'm sinking deeper in this pit of love I dug so long a ago for him.i hated that I loved him and how I knew he was gonna do me wrong.but with his arms wrapped around me like they were right now I can't help but leave that as a problem for future me.

★𝐀𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐜

𝐌𝐚𝐭𝐭 𝐬𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐨𝐥𝐨 𝐱 𝐟𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

Proofread:kinda...not rlly

Wordcount:2266

WARNINGS:throw up/emetophobia , panic attack, crying, this takes place before they’re like famous or wtv.also this is very long.

A/N:ntm on the banner idk what happened😭

“Guess where I’m going tonight”I said to the boy I was on the phone with.my best friend Matt.he was playing video games while I got ready.probably not paying much attention to what I was doing but definitely listening.

“Where?” he questioned as his face twisted into one of frustration.most likely because of the game he was playing.

“I’m going to hailys party” I cheekily said.smiling just at the thought of what tonight would be like.

“Isn’t that like all seniors?” he asked, concern lacing his tone.even though we were both the same age he always acted like my older brother.

"uh yea, i'll be fine dont worry.im not gonna like get fucked by a 20 year old or end up passed out in the street.im a responsible person matt."i rambled on

"i know you are but- shit...seniors can be pretty intense sometimes" the boy on the other line explained

"ill be fine dude, ok anyways, what outfit do i wear?" i said while show-casing two outfits that lay on separate hangers.

"im kinda in the middle of something right now"

"i dont care, just look for a second"

"y/n i litterally cant"

"matthew bernard sturniolo turn your fucking head this direction and help me pick out an outift or i swear to God"

"ok ok jeez" he said as he hesitantly turned to face his phone screen. "i don't like either of them"

"oh fuck you" i said as i put my phone onto its back so i could change into one of the outfits.

✧At the party

a large smile was painted on my face as i swayed my hips to the beat of the music. I've never felt more alive.the freshly poured drink splishing and splashing around in the cup i was holding, small droplets finding a home on my wrist. despite this being me being only a junior i was mixing well with the crowd.not feeling awkward or like i didn't belong for a second

a tap on my shoulder stopped my movements abruptly.i turned around to where the feeling came from only to see the girl that i came here with, Serenity. she looked deepyly upset which wasnt usual for the cheerful girl. "hey sese, whats up?" i yelled over the loud music.im not even sure if she could hear me.

"i feel sick" serenity answered. i quickly grabbed her hand and bee-lined it to the bathroom.she had been drinking alot.way more then me.and i was sure that what she mean t by 'i feel sick' was 'im about to throw up' and i want that to be no where else but the toilet.for her dignity and my sanity.

i banged on the door of the first bathroom i came across. "occupied!" someone yelled from the other side, forcing me to practically drag serenity down the crowded hallway to another bathroom.once we made it to the white door i realized there was no point in knocking because i could hear two drunken people going at it as if it were their last night on earth.

panic began to set in at the same pace as reality.no more bathrooms in sight. shit shit shit i mentally cursed to myslef as i looked over at a half folded over serenity. "y/n i think im gonna throw up"the blonde girl stated

i quietly mumbled "no no your not, please don't, not here" but my pleads were to no eval as once the words left my mouth so did all of the drinks serenity had earlier.it was all over me.my shirt and jeans and even my white shoes. i screamed in panic. tears spilling out of my eyes almost automatically.

as my eyes darted all over the place i noticed the bathroom door where the couple once were fucking was now open.i put my hand on serenities back and shoveled her into the bathroom, careful not to touch any of the vomit on my shirt.she dropped to her knees and went head first into the toilet at the sight of it.the sounds making me gag internally.

i slid down the wall behind me and sobbed.not being able to escape the vomit.i pulled my phone out of my back pocket and opened my contacts.i was about to call my mom to pick me up before i looked at the time. '1:48' it read. she was most definitely asleep. the scrolled through my contacts looking for someone that could come pick me up.

'Matty boy' was the name my eyes locked on, not even waiting a second before calling him.the phone rang longer than i would've liked it to as i pressed it up to my ear. please pick up i mentally begged "hey y/n." a sleepy Matt said on the other line.

i wasted no time "Matt please-please come get me"i choked out through cries.

"what?whats going on?are you ok?"he asked.now sounding more alert and awake

"serenity threw up on me and i-i don't know what to do.please just come get me.please Matt"i begged through the phone.tears sprung out my eyes and rolled down my face, leaving marks of dripping mascara to stain my cheeks.

"ok ill be there in a few minutes.wheres serenity now?"Matt asked.i hadn't even noticed her.i looked down from the ceiling i was staring at and locked eyes with her body.

"she's passed out...o-on the bathroom floor"i slowly got out.

"ok y/n listen to me very carfully,i need you to call haily and tell her serenity is in the bathroom passed out and that you need a chnage of clothes okay?do not leave serenity there." the boy on the other line stated very seriously. i mumbled a small 'okay 'before Matt began talking again "ill be there in a few minutes, don't move from the bathroom."he said before hanging up.silence now filling my ears.

✧Some time later

serenity was now gone after being taken to hailys room so she could sober up.i have a change of clothes on, some large sweat pants and a 'the smiths' t-shirt. although my clothes were now in the washer being clean from throw up, i couldn't get the thought out of my head.

this night, my first real party, had gone to shit.i was tried, scared, my makeup was ruined, my back hurt.i just want to go home. then as if my thoughts were read a knock came at the door. "come in"i lightly shouted.

as soon as the door opened and matt was visible i sprung up from my spot on the floor.hugging the boy before either of us could say anything.sobbing into his shoulder. "its okay.its okay.im here."the brunnete boy said into my hair

he held my back as we walked through the sea of people in order to make it to the exit.drunken others staring at us we walked by.i grabbed my coat which had somehow not bee touched the whole night, a dark blue zip up hoodie.i felt goosebumps go up my arms a I put it on.

the cold air hit my face unexpectidely.the winter weather sending shock through my warm body.a smile krept onto my face for an unidentified reason. i brought my arms over my chest and folded them. "why are you smiling?"matt asked while looking over at me.a smile on his face aswell

"i dont know" i answred with a small giggle.once we finally made it to the car i hobbled myself into the front passenger seat.the car was practically silent as he put the key in the ignition and started it.not much being needed to be said.

Once we pulled out of the carefully chosen parking spot I advised Matt to not drive me home seeing as my mom would probably kill me.a small hum of approval being the only noise to come from him.

This silence was soon followed up with an unexpected “thank you”from Matt. “For calling me when you needed to and not being stubborn”he clarified

A vocal response didn’t seem to fit the situation so I simply nodded in acknowledgment. “My parents are actually out on vacation so there’s no harm in you staying the night by the way, went to Maine or something.” He began to speak.I didn’t respond.only looking out the window infront of me.

“So what was it like?your first senior party?”the driving boy asked as he focused on the road infront of us.the street lights and cars illuminating his pale face.

“Well besides being thrown up on and having a whole panic attack it was pretty good.the drinks were alright and a few guys hit on me but besides that it was just alright”I answered his question.

“Not everything you dreamed of?”matt asked teasingly. Shaking my head no in response “Bummer.well now you get to spend the night with me” he continued as we pulled into his driveway.i never realized how close he lived to Haily.

Once we entered the house I was met with Chris sitting at the kitchen table. “Woah what happened to you”Chris asked.looking up from his cereal and phone.

“A party” I weakly answered.

“Oh is that y/n?”Nick asked from the couch as he turned his head around to face me. “Hey baeee, had a rough night?”he greeted and questioned.

“Rough Night is the understatement of the century”I grumbled as I opened their fridge searching for water.

“You went to hailys party right?yea those seniors are crazy.are those your clothes?”Nick rambled on.

“No these are hailys,serenity threw up on me.”I casually answered,shuddering at the remembrance of what happened.I stretched my arm out to grab the advil in their top shelf.

“Oh gross.you sleeping here tonight?”chris chimed in and asked.

“Yea, no point in going home and getting my ass beat.”I exaggerated

“Where you sleepin?”chris asked again

“Not with you, last time you punched me right in the boob, painful as fuck.”I retorted as I swapped the pills and water.

“Dude it was an accident!i was sleeping!”he answered as he threw his hand sup in defense.making me giggle.

“Not taking any chances”

“Well you can’t sleep with me.”Nick stated suddenly

“Why?”

“My bed is fucking lopsided and I have to sleep on the couch till it’s fixed” Nick said

“Just sleep in Chris’ room”

“He fucking attacks me in his sleep!”

“What about Matt?”

“He’s up too late for me, I need my eight hours but I guess this kid only needs 8 minutes” Nick answered my few questions causing me to lightly laugh

“Ok then I guess I’m sleeping in your room Matty boy”I said, turning to the boy who had just been listening to this conversation silently.

“Ok then cmon,I’m going to bed right now”he tiredly said as he walked in the direction of his room.

“I find that hard to believe”Nick shouted from his place in the couch.

I hugged Chris and Nick before following Matt into his room.

Upon opening the door I saw Matt face down on the mattress. “Jeez I didn’t think you were that tired” I joked as I sat down on the bed next to him.the calming blue led lights coloring us and the rest of the room around us.

He turned his head sideways to face me “I’m always tired”he mumbled.I situated my body so I was now laying next to him more comfortably.we then gradually moved ourselves to face each other while laying on our sides.his eyes staring into mine deeply.

"your beautiful" I whispered under my breath. ive always though Matt was attractive.not in a sexual way but the same way I think Alahna is pretty.but tonight was different.the way the blue lights bounced off his face, and how his messy hair rested almost perfectly on his forehead, or maybe it was how his dark, tired, eyes never seemed to look scary or weird on him.nonetheless he looked a way I don't even think I could describe if you put the words out in-front of me.

"your angelic..." I found myself say as my heart was taking action before my brain.i brushed some hair out of his eyes delicately with my fresh painted nails.he didn't respond, only giving me small smile.i caressed the side of his face with the back of my hand.tracing his facial structure.

"I love you" he abruptly said.the three words causing blood to rush to my cheeks rapidly.my heart besting faster almost as if on command

"I'll always love you more"I solemnly said.not exactly wanting to see his reaction to my words i moved in a little closer and closed my eyes.curling up and grabbing the covers.to my surprise though, after a few minutes I could feel his arm sake over my body and pull me closer.my head resting under his chin lightly.

then we fell asleep peacefully.silently hoping that if we were to never to wake up again that we stay together in the next life

⋆。·₊°♱༺ 𝙢𝙖𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙧𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙩 ༻♱༉‧₊˚.

𝙆𝙚𝙮

*✩-𝙁𝙡𝙪𝙛𝙛 ☣︎ ✘-𝘼𝙣𝙜𝙨𝙩 ☣︎ 🂱-𝙎𝙢𝙪𝙩 ☣︎ ☽-𝘽𝙡𝙪𝙧𝙗𝙨 ☣︎ ┊͙-𝙋𝙡𝙖𝙩𝙤𝙣𝙞𝙘 ☣︎ ☮︎-𝙃𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙘𝙖𝙣𝙣𝙤𝙣𝙨

𝘾𝙝𝙧𝙞𝙨 𝙨𝙩𝙪𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙤𝙡𝙤

.☽---He's mine

*✩---Love birds

*✩---First kiss

*✩---Surprise

1.✘---Jealous girl —— 2🂱.✘ ---Intoxicating

*✩---On camera

*✩---Confessional

*✩---Tattoo

*✩--- Bike rides

𝙈𝙖𝙩𝙩 𝙎𝙩𝙪𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙤𝙡𝙤

.☽---Polar opposite

.✘---Worst of me

.☽ ---Killer

*✩---Angelic

.☽ ---Hot Sleeper

𝙉𝙞𝙘𝙠 𝙎𝙩𝙪𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙤𝙡𝙤

E̲̲R̲̲R̲̲O̲̲R̲; ̲N̲̲O̲̲T̲ ̲Y̲̲E̲̲T̲ ̲A̲̲V̲̲A̲̲I̲̲L̲̲A̲̲B̲̲L̲̲E̲:/

𝘼𝙡𝙡 𝙊𝙛 𝙏𝙝𝙚𝙢

┊͙---Wing man

☮︎---The baby project

🂱.✘ ---Purple Rain; M & C

𝗒𝗈𝗎'𝗏𝖾 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖼𝗁𝖾𝖽 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝖾𝗇𝖽 ˙ ͜ʟ˙

★𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐬𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐞

Matt x fem!reader

Proofread:mhm

Word count:1443

WARNINGS:drinking/being drunk, cheating,physical abuse mentioned,depression themes,self destructive reader,reader is kinda dumb at the end tho

A/N:I don’t think Matt would ever do this but idrc.I wanted to write some sad angst shit yk.anyways yea I don’t think Matt would ever cheat or hit his gf so like don’t come after me.Also tysm for 50 followers!!kinda crazy since i only started writing on here abt a month ago but yea, TYYY💗💗

𖦹 𖦹

No thoughts consumed my head as I took another swig of vodka.the tv was on but I wasn’t tuned in.i’d been on this couch for God knows how long.my legs feel numb.another sip.

Food would be scarce if I was hungry.eating never crossing my mind which was only replaying what had gone down two days ago.me and Matt got into a fight.not just any fight.he hit me.not just a small grab or a light smack on the arm,he full on smacked me across the face.another sip

I was shocked at first but my shock turned into anger.what we were fighting about in the first place was trivial now.I had been holding back at first but him striking me set me loose.I screamed at him louder than I think I ever have.nonsense spilling from my lips.another sip.

He was stunned by my rage filled yelling.only whispering small ‘sorry’s and ‘are you okay’s.I never got angry at Matt.he could step on my heart and crush it into a million pieces and I wouldn’t be that mad.well that’s what I thought until yesterday.I’m so stupid.another sip

I found messages.messages between him and another girl.one he called “my love” and “princess”.the guy who I thought was the sweetest boy and was the best boyfriend I could ever ask for was actually a lying ,cheating douche bag.it’s my fault for falling for him.another sip.

I was so stuck in my own head that I didn’t hear the front door open. “Y/nnnn” as all I heard.the sudden voice would normally make me jolt my head towards it but I found that nearly impossible with the state I was in.another sip

Matt stepped into view.now in front of me.he gave me a look.I couldn’t tell if it was disgust or sympathy.I didn’t know anything about him anymore. “What”I slurred out.another sip

“Have you been drinking?”Matt asked.dumb question for someone who was smart enough to hide another woman from me for months.

“Yea no shit genius,fuck do you want”I spat out sharply.

“I want to talk”he answered.his fist clenched as he said this.

“Get out Matt ''I barely got out as I smiled drunkenly.I don’t know why I was smiling.just felt right.

“No I’m not getting out, we need to talk and you need to sober up so we can have a proper conversation like grown adults” Matt said as I took another sip.I tilted my head back and he snatched the bottle out of my hand.

“Fuck you Matt”I flipped him off as my head went farther back into the arm rest of the couch.

“I’m not gonna let you destroy yourself, this is like the worst version of you”he said, frustration filling his voice.

“You bring out the worst of me baby”I replied.my response making Matt go silent.he ignored my comment.not saying anything as he bent down to pick me up bridal style.i was too tired to protest against this.

Matt mumbled some incoherent side comments under his breath.I didn't care enough to ask for him to repeat himself. "where are we going"i said lightly as i placed my head on his chest, my neck too weak to support the weight of my own head.

"You need a shower, you smell like vodka and sweat"Matt answered my question.he was probably right.i haven't really moved off the couch in at least a day. "can you stand?" he followed up as we entered the bathroom.

"probably not"i said with a slight huff coming out my nose.barely laughing at my own joke.he didn't say anything in response,lightly setting me down.i stabilized myself on his shoulder as to not fall over.once i caught my balance i let go of him.now being able to stand up straight.

"ill uh turn around so you can get undressed if you want" matt said wearily.not to get into any detail but we've been dating for 4 years, he's seen me naked before.so i said just that.

"i dont really give a fuck, i mean youve seen me naked before, not like much has changed in 6 days"i said,the alcohol making me more bold.if i we're sober then i wouldve mumbled a small 'no it’s ok..'

I pulled my white tank top off weakly.my arms and fingertips were asleep. "how you been?" matt asked as i took of my pj pants.i gave him a full blank stare.he knew how i'd been doing. "right, sorry, dumb question" he backtracked

"listen y/n i'm sorry about-"matt started before i cut him off annoyed "can we talk about this later, i just wanna take a shower right now"

“Yea thats…that’s fine”the blue eyed boy said as he left the bathroom,closing the door on his way out so i could clean off my body in privacy.

𝐀𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐫

I shivered as I stepped out the warm shower into the cold which had been awaiting me.I was now sobering up.becoming more aware of my surroundings and what i was actually doing.

After I dried off I began to put on the clothes Matt had left out for me.not even noticing him doing that earlier.I got goosebumps as I pulled the hoodie he left out for me over my head and onto my body.I couldn’t help but realize it was his hoodie.

I wiggled into my pajama pants and began to do my hair like normal.my skin care was the same routine as always too.nothing abnormal,

Once I was done I walked over to the door and opened it attentively.my eyes were met with Matt sitting on my bed scrolling through his phone.I didn't say anything though.simply walking over to him and laying down next to him awkwardly.

He set his phone down once I sat on the bed. “How do you feel?”the taller boy asked while looking at me.I muttered a small ‘better’ as I began staring off into the distance.wondering how the fuck I got here in life

“Listen y/n im so so sorry for everything I’ve done to you.cheating was stupid and I realize that.I blocked her on everything.the only girl I want is you I swear”Matt started “I mean your litterly perfect and I know this is cheesy but I’m so in love with you God I mean I wake up everyday thinking about you and I go to bed at night doing the same.your the only girl I’ve ever felt this way for.I couldn’t even bare the last 2 days away from you.the whole time I was sat in bed missing your laugh,and your eyes, and your personality,fuck I missed you.I thought I would be ok but I was so so wrong.please y/n forgive me,I seriously can’t live without you”he finished off

I took a moment to respond.not exactly knowing what to say. “Well then why did you hit me?”I said blankly. “If all of that is true then why did you hit me?” I questioned again, now going into more detail.

“I-I don’t know, something just came over me.you know how I am sometimes.please y/n I really do love you.there’s nothing I want to do more then spend the rest of my life with you.”

“Can I just think about this please,this is kinda a lot to take in and I’m really tired right now.''I said, excusing myself from this whole conversation.

“Yes of course”the boy next to me said as he began to get up and leave.I wasn’t going to say anything and just let him leave as if I don't care.but that wasn't the truth.and I feel like we’ve had enough lies between each other the last few days.

“Can you stay please,I’ve missed you too”I caved in honestly.

“Oh sure”he replied hesitantly as he walked back to his previous spot.we don't say anything else from there.simply laying down and getting as close together as possible.I missed this, and even though I can’t read minds I think he missed this as well.

★𝐉𝐞𝐥𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥

Chris sturniolo x fem!reader

Word count:1887

Proof read:yurrr

WARNINGS:swearing, pick me girl, couple fighting, jealousy (duh)

A/N:def gonna make a second part to this but i'm not sure how i wanna go abt it yet.also sorry i haven't published anything in awhile lol i've had lik 0 motivation and i've also just been crazy busy.btw this https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8AtpHeu/ is the everlong meme that is mentioned if you don’t know what I’m talking abt.

𖦹 𖦹

I set my lash glue down as I heard the unmistakable ring of an incoming phone call from across the room.knowing i was going out with my friends and my boyfriend and that's what I was getting ready for, I immediately got up from my vanity to grab my phone. 'matty boy' read the caller id.it was strange for matt to be calling me instead of chris but i simply assumed his phone was dead, not thinking much about it.

"hey y/nn, we're outside, you ready?'' Matt spoke into the phone.before i could answer his question i heard faint giggling in the back.due to it sounding like a girls giggle i became more confused.as far as i knew it was just the three boys and me, madi backing out because she was babysitting unfortunately.

"yea i just need to put my lash on but i'll be out in a sec"i answered truthfully. more giggling could be heard, now clearer than before.yes i was curious but chose not to ask anything because i was probably on speaker right now.

"Alright, just take your time, we're not in a rush,"Matt said calmly before I muttered a quick 'mk' and hung up the phone.

stepping out of the house i immediately saw the van waiting for me.speed walking up to it happily.as i got closer to the car i could see the front seat,the one my boyfriend normally sits in, was empty.weird yes but not insane.i mean it's not like he's shackled down to the seat.but once i made it to the door of the car i realized the reality of what was going on.nick sat on the left,chris in the middle and ashley on the right looking up at chris while leaning onto his shoulder. what the fuck was all i thought as i stepped into the car. "hey babe, '' Chris said from the back seat, causing the smaller girl to slowly get off him.

"Oh hi Chris" I said lovingly,not wanting to call him anything but his first name at the sight of him being so touchy with another girl.

"oh yea you know Ashley right y/n '' Matt said as he began to back out of my driveway.of course i knew her.although she was more of the boys friend then mine it was pretty hard to miss her with how obnoxious she was. Nick has told me many times that he's not too fond of her but Chris and Matt seem to have no problem with the girl.

"Hey,"I said with a warm smile on my face while turning around to greet the girl,only receiving a small awkward smile in return.

Once we had finally made it to the restaurant after what felt like forever we all stepped out of the car.chris gave me a small kiss on the cheek now that we were close together. "I missed you, '' the taller boy whispered into my ear, causing me to forget everything I had seen previously.

Ashley and Nick had now taken the lead of our group,Matt in the middle and me and Chris in the back.The order stayed the same as we entered the restaurant and Nick began talking to the seating lady. "yea so party of five- 'who's the fifth? oh yea nevermind' ashley interrupted.not sure how she could forget me when she was on top of my boyfriend a minute ago but ok i guess.

"chris sit with me!" she said like a little kid once the seater brought us to a booth.nick,who now was sitting to her left gave me a look that described how i felt as well.my boyfriend awkwardly obliged and sat with her, leaving me to sit with Matt.which i would have been totally fine with if my boyfriend wasn't sitting directly across from me with another girl.

"wait your seriously gonna eat all of that.'' Ashley said as I began to eat my food.being on top of my boyfriend is one thing but making backhanded comments is another.

if we weren't in public i would’ve said something as rude as what just came out of her cheaply filled lips but due to the restaurant being packed i decided to be civil "well yea im fuckin hungry"was all i said before turning to nick in order to start a conversation with him.

"Y/nn take a picture of us for the photo dump tomorrow."nick said as he handed me his phone.i nodded slightly as i opened his camera and told them to pose.but of course as soon as the word left my mouth little miss bitch hooked herself onto chris and leaned on his shoulder.

yes i was mad at her for being like this for no apparent reason but i was also upset at chris for not saying anything.he just sat there and posed as well. "ok now we gotta get you guys, Ashley, take the photo since you're like in the middle." nick asked politely

"you sure she won't break the camera?'' Ashley joked as she looked at Nick for approval of her poorly curated joke.

"yea im pretty fuckin sure."the blonde boy replied.

"If that's really a concern of yours then maybe don't turn the camera around"Matt said in my defense.Through all this Chris stayed silent.like his lips were sealed.

For once Ashley didn't say anything,snatching the phone out of my hand.And now since Chris was being weird I decided to piss him off a little.make him feel what i've felt all night.

I put up a small thumbs up and leaned onto Matt's shoulder as my pose.the boy to my right did the same hand movement as we both smiled.I knew he wouldn't take this the wrong way and maybe even would understand why I was doing this.

✧Two days later, Saturday

My thumb repeated the same movement it had been doing for the past 45 minutes.it being late at night and not exactly wanting to talk to my boyfriend due to the way he acted the other night made my night extremely boring.

the next video on my for you page was one i didn't expect to see but the timing was almost perfect.it was a screen recording of the photo dump where the person scrolled until they got to the photos from the other night.the first picture was the one of me and matt and the next one was the one i took.the one where my boyfriend acted the same way he does with me, with another girl.

the video being the everlong meme made it slightly funny in my head but no laugh came out of me.before thinking i sent it to chris and nick.i sent it to nick because i knew he would agree and talk shit with me but i sent it to chris to show him why i haven't been talking to him the past day.why i haven't answered his calls or texts.

Nick's response was what I expected to be honest. 'yea im not inviting her anywhere no more, fuck that bitch' was what he had typed and sent in response to the video.

chris did not respond at all.simply leaving me on read.that hurt more than the other shit he's done recently.not only does he always respond to the videos i send him but one where i'm obviously trying to tell him something important.i glanced up at the time in the corner of my phone.it was only 8:30.too early for me to fall asleep so i simply turned over and continued scrolling.

After about an hour I heard the doorbell ring.assuming it was a stupid kid from down the street due to there being a lot of teens that lived on my road I ignored it.then the bell rang again.I rolled my eyes and became more aware of my surroundings, now being woken up.

‘Ping’ was all I heard from my phone that was now faces down on my mattress.as I turned it over the first and only notification I had was from my boyfriend, Chris.a text message that simply read “can you open the door it’s mad cold out here”

I sighed deeply as I realized what was going on.stepping out of my warm bed and walking down the stairs in my chilly house.

Once I had made it to the door I left my hand on the knob for a moment before opening it, not exactly sure if I wanted to be face to face with Chris at the moment.but nonetheless I opened it and was met with a sorry looking blue eyed boy.

“Hey”I said quietly due to me still being tired.I didn’t exactly know what to say.we almost never got into fights like this,certainly not one’s where we went more than a day not talking.

“Why didn’t you say anything?”the boy quickly said,skipping any form of greeting.

“Excuse me?”I responded.I noticed little drops of rain began to form outside as our conversation started.was he seriously blaming me for his bs?

He was struggling to look me in the eyes,something he had never had a problem with in the past.he actually often said he could stare into mine for hours and get lost in them. “Why didn’t you say anything to me, how was I supposed to know you were upset?”he said now more arrogant hints in his tone.

“Oh jeez sorry I thought my boyfriend of 3 years would be able to know that I don’t exactly love when some random girl calls me ugly and then hops on top of him”I said in response to his stupid question.

“She’s not just some girl,she’s my friend,”he said rudely.

“Go fuck yourself”i said weakly,tears welling up in my eyes.now the rain began to hit the ground harder.it was almost as if it was synced up with how i felt.

“What”he whispered

“I said go fuck yourself dip shit,get out of my face,leave me alone,I don’t want to see you let alone talk to you right now!”i said now louder.anger and sadness being my main emotions.

“Y/n I just don’t understand why you're being like this,I get that you don’t like what she said and how she’s on top of me all the time but I’ve told her to stop,what else do you want me to do?”he said putting his hands up in defense.

“Ugh your so stupid, drop her, why is she still your friend, do you have a fucking chemical imbalance in your brain why don’t you get that?!”i practically yelled. “I didn’t want it to come down to this because I know it’s corny but..me or her”I finished

Very movie-like of me yes but so what.he needs to choose because as long as he’s friends with her I don’t want anything to do with him.

*ੈ✩‧₊˚༺𝙎𝙩𝙖𝙧𝙡𝙪𝙫𝙨𝙭༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚

haii, My name is Sarah and I've been writing on Tumblr for almost a year now I think(not consistently of course).I started out writing and reading on wattpad but now i'm here! I really like all kinds of music tbh but my favorite artists are probably Lana Del Rey, Tyler the creator, Pierce the veil, Playboi Carti, Mitski and The smiths. I love editing and reading (books recs are always appreciated!). i'm a big talker which is why im doing this in this format lol. I like to dress emo/alternative/scene I suppose.i also really love anime. some of my faves are probably jjk, Saki K, Csm and Deathnote; btw I have an anime fic blog here if that’s something that interests you!I also(obviously) Love the triplets. i've been watching them since 2022 and went to see them in NJ, October 9th I think. fun fact; where they're from in somerville is only like a 20-25 minute drive from where I live and some of their videos are shot in places I go to often, same with one of their intros.i don't buy a lot of merch cause i'm broke ash but I have a tour shirt, a fresh love shirt and the original space camp launch package thing. okay your probably annoyed with my talking so l'll stfu now, Happy reading!

They Made You Cry (MHA/Fem!Reader)

(Laser: I'm sad today, so I curse you with angst.)

Summary: MHA characters reacting to making their girlfriend cry. (Angst, arguments, and some unhealthy relationship dynamics.)

Characters: Bakugou, Dabi, Aizawa, Shigaraki, Midoriya

MHA-MHA-MHA

Bakugou

Katsuki's heart sinks when he sees the unmistakable wetness that mists over your eyes. What's worse, what really makes him feel like the worst kind of bastard, is the way you shy away from his gaze with a sense of bitter defeat. Like he's getting what he wanted. Like his victory, his intention, was pushing you to tears.

As if he could ever consider this a victory.

"H-Hey..." he reaches out to you, awkward and unsure. He's so bad at dealing with tears, especially yours. It's so much easier to take on whatever piece of shit that's made you cry, but in this case, it's him. He's the piece of shit.

You sniffle, hurriedly brushing past him, equal parts angry and hurt.

"Whatever, Katsuki."

Dabi

The thing about you is that you're so damn unpredictable. Sweet one second, drawing blood the next.

Dabi kind of loves it. It keeps things from becoming boring, getting stale. And you're so hot when your eyes are ablaze with whatever emotion is overcoming you.

Just like right now, in the middle of some pointless, bullshit argument, when something he says makes you snap. You tackle him to the ground, your hands fisting into his jacket as you yell in his face. All he can do is grin up at you dangerously, just as angry, but equally as enticed by just how vibrant you look in this moment.

Then something even sweeter happens.

Big, fat tears begin to drip from your wild eyes, and Dabi sucks in a breath. You sob, frustrated and overwhelmed, and his cold, little heart warms at the sight.

"Oh, pretty girl..."

His arms wrap around you as you cry into his chest, cursing his name all the while. He strokes your hair, twisted affection squirming in his chest like a nest of spiders.

Always so unpredictable and entertaining.

Aizawa

"(Name), I-" Shouta falters, all the anger and frustration from your argument washed away by cold, all-consuming guilt at the sight of the tears slipping down your face.

You hurriedly wipe them away, stepping back, away from him, and the guilt deepens.

He knows you hate crying in front of him, even when it isn't his fault. It makes you feel weak, and he knows you worry he'll think less of you, that he'll find your more emotional way of being "irrational."

You turn, hiding your face as you try to walk away, but he stops you, gently catching you by the arm.

"Wait," he pleads, his voice gentle, "I'm sorry." Because no argument is worth making you cry.

"I don't want you to see me like this," you mutter, your head down. But at least you're not pulling away from him. He takes that as a good sign.

"Don't hide from me," he urges. He takes you by the chin and tilts your head up so he can look at you properly. He brushes your tears away, regretful that they're there in the first place. "Let's talk about this, okay?"

He's always so stubborn, set in his ways. But he'll try to meet you in the middle, to understand your perspective. You're worth it.

Shigaraki

Tomura feels no guilt at the sight of your tears, only vindictive satisfaction. Good. He'd been aiming to hurt you when he said those words to you. He really can't stand the way you make him feel sometimes, so he's happy to return the favor.

"You're seriously crying?" he taunts with a cruel smirk, poking at your cheek with a mocking finger.

You smack his hand away, "fuck you, Tomura, you fucking prick," you hiss, trying not to cry even more in front of him. You turn and storm away from him before things get even worse.

"You're so pathetic!" he calls after you, making sure you can hear him before you slam the door behind you.

He huffs, standing there and scratching at his neck. You're so damn overdramatic, a pain in his ass. You deserve to cry a little for the shit you put him through.

The image of your tear-filled face flashes through his mind. He ignores the way it makes his stomach twist with discomfort.

Midoriya

Izuku feels his own eyes fill with tears, watching you hug yourself and cry in front of him.

"(N-Name)... please don't cry..." he begs, his hands brushing up and own your arms, trying to console you.

"I thought I was never going to see you again," you cry, your words making his heart ache. You scrub a shaking hand over your eyes, "I was so s-scared for you!"

"I'm sorry, (Name)," he pulls you into a hug, his own tears running free. He really scared you this time. It was a close call. "It's okay, I'm okay. I'm here."

He shushes you gently, guilt spreading through his chest at the distress he's caused you. His job is always going to cause you to worry, the only thing he can do is try his best to come home to you at the end of the day.

(Requests)