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How did you find a mistress that didn't want money
Spoiler alert, you won't find it on Tumblr. At least, I don't think so. 99% of the "Mistresses" are only here for money and will ask for tribute or a picture of you to blackmail you. I personally find play partners on FetLife. It works mostly like that: going to event like munch or munch&play, meet people, take contacts. It can take time but it worth making the effort as you will meet real people that respect the basic rules of bdsm such as communication, consentment and empathy