Existance - Blog Posts

scene stealer kim yeontan

Man life is funny when you just stop giving a shit. Like you distance yourself. Act like you're not a human experiencing the fall of humanity, imagine ur an alien watching it. Watching them scramble to pick up the pieces they themselves broke.

However we got here I don't know, but for this metaphor let's say god's how. God is you in this metaphor. You've just placed your very fish hungry cat into a fish tank. The fish tank has to water but a multitude of fish. All the cat must do is eat the fish. The cat then grows a fucking hand and fucking fills the tank with water. Then when the cat cannot breathe it's shocked. It hops and skips for air and gives up because, "Well not much I can do about it; I mean I'm only a cat." The cat is thinking. So the cat just slowly fucking drowns. And you just stand there like,

And you're simply in too much shock to help your drowning cat and honestly the fish might be dead too they were out of the water for a while. And what the fuck is going on and why the fuck did your cat GROW A FUCKING ARM!??!?!?!??!?

Anyway so in this metaphor, God is you, the cat is humanity, the arm is economics and fossil fuel and colonisation, the fishes are earth and existence, and of course the water is the global issues we're facing.

The point is, if a cat growing an arm and drowning itself isn't funny to you, get rid of the water pussy. Get it? Pussy. It's a cat metaphor- Anyway! If it is funny to you then like just fucking watch! Like see what happens. I don't know!? Maybe the arm comes back and grabs a bucket. The funniest and most likely outcomes are,

1.) The cat just fucking sits down and takes it, slowly drowning with a care in the world. (We all die like the dinos did)

2.) The cat freaks out and pushes the fish tank over and it explodes into a million shards of glass. (Apocalypse senario)

3.) The cat stands up and steps out of the tank. (Moving planets)

4.) The cat drinks the water and then chokes and dies (We use our problems to cause more problems)

5.) The cat grabs a bucket and slowly dumps out the water. (We fix this shit)

Either way I'm rooting for 5 but I cannot wait to see what happens, especially if it's six. Oh six is the cat growing gills which is basically just the frog in a pot metaphor where we all just get used to the planet being on fire and not being able to breathe nice air.

Any bye!!!!!

When I say that I don't want to exist right now, that doesn't mean i want to die. Not to me it doesn't. All it means is I want to disconnect from myself. To not feel my own emotions, to not hear my brain rile on and on, to not feel my skin on my body, to not feel, to not hear, to not taste, to not smell, to not see but still observe. I don't want to be interacted with like a person when I wish to not exist. I wish to a narrator, a viewer, a camera-man. I wish that I could fast forward to when this was a memory. I know it may seem concerning, or maybe a bit outlandish, but it makes sense to me. I want to not be there but still be there. I want to not be acknowledged by anyone and to simply watch. Watch others experience what's happening. And I want to not experience it. I don't want it. I just want to sit in the corner and watch. But when someone's in the corner watching, someone has to whisper. Has to ask questions. Has to make me exist. I don't want that. I don't want to exist, but I don't want to die either. It does make sense to me, but not everyone is me. I don't mind that either. But I want to be able to say that I am not existing and for people to understand. For them to not be concerned about the kid in the corner. About the guy sitting in silence. About your suspiciously quiet friend. I am simply not for now, and I hope you can accept that.