Healthy Relationships - Blog Posts

Relationships are like food.

I just thought of this analogy and I think it works really well.

When making a meal you need to have a good flavor balance, you need the salty, the sweet, the savoury, and the spicy.

You are a part of the meal to so you need a food that compliments you well too. For example I think of myself as like a potato, I'm not super flavorful but I'm a good base and I go well with a lot of different flavors, aka I get along with people very easily. But there is certain foods that I get along with best and those are like my friends and family.

And so having relationships and making friendships is like making a meal. Sometimes you might need a bit more spice in your life so you will hang out with a more adventurous friend. Or maybe you don't like spice so you hanged out with a more sweet friend.

But it's still important to have a balance in your diet, to much of one thing can also be bad.

And some times someone doesn't compliment your flavor and it's okay. You can't expect everything to taste good together.

This also might be why opposites attract, they taste well together even if it's an odd flavor combination.

I just think that this is a cool concept and way to look at relationships.

« lemme take a photo »

« smile! »

love freely - E.C. - oct. 2020

New Crow Time 🐦‍⬛🦊🌟

This has to be my quote of the year.

The University of the Sunshine Coast is conducting research into the relationship between masculinity, femininity, sexual orientations/gender identity and online dating motivations/behaviours.

They are seeking at least 150 LGBTQI+ participants and 150 heterosexual participants to fill out their completely anonymous research survey to help them identify the best ways to improve online dating.

Please I implore you all to share this post with anyone and everyone who is over the age of 18 and has ever had, is currently or intends to engage in online dating.

Online Survey Software | Qualtrics Survey Solutions

“Tired of navigating the online dating space? Never sure if the person you’re interested in is genuine or not? You’re not alone! The university of the Sunshine Coast is interested in these questions too, and by completing our quick 20 minute survey we hope to discover where the best chances to find love are online. All participation in anonymous where we hope to discover the best chances for a successful relationship.

This is a great list and so very true. You find a lot of this toxicity in Dd/lg and D/s relationships too. It is so important to establish a healthy relationship no matter what relationship type you are in. It is important that your partner is always respectful of you, your needs, your boundaries, your goals in life and that they always support your personal growth. If your partner doesn’t do this for you then you need to rethink your relationship. If you can’t do this for your partner then you need to work on your own issues and trauma first. There’s nothing cool, sexy or romantic about toxic habits. Build good relationships, respect yourself and your partner. Always!

What I mean when I say "toxic monogamy culture"

the normalization of jealousy as an indicator of love

the idea that a sufficiently intense love is enough to overcome any practical incompatibilities

the idea that you should meet your partner’s every need, and if you don’t, either you’re inadequate or they’re too needy

the idea that a sufficiently intense love should cause you to cease to be attracted to anyone else

the idea that commitment is synonymous with exclusivity

the idea that marriage and children are the only valid teleological justifications for being committed to a relationship

the idea that your insecurities are always your partner’s responsibility to tip-toe around and never your responsibility to work on

the idea that your value to a partner is directly proportional to the amount of time and energy they spend on you, and it is in zero-sum competition with everything else they value in life

the idea that being of value to a partner should always make up a large chunk of how you value yourself