Low Empathy - Blog Posts

I’ve always thought that (generally speaking) people with low or no empathy have the capability to be better/nicer people than those with empathy. Growing up without empathy means you have to learn how to be nice, to everyone, and you probably understand what kindness is more. Growing up with empathy means you never have to learn this stuff, it just comes to you naturally. And then when there’s someone they don’t feel empathy for, they aren’t able to be nice or kind to them. Because we have to learn this stuff, we do it for everyone. People who have empathy will never feel it for every single person or people who differ from them in any way, and it shows.

today is one of those days where I'm pissy and can barely even push up a bit of sympathy, so that's wonderful /s

♡ types of empathy + examples . . .

cognitive empathy . . .

ー cognitive empathy is understanding someone's thoughts and/or feelings. this is when you intellectually understand what someone else is feeling, without necessarily feeling it yourself.

ー example: imagine your co-worker is nervous before giving a big presentation. you don't necessarily feel nervous yourself, but you understand why they feel that way, so you offer them encouragement.

ー how it feels: you recognize the emotion/feeling logically. "ah, they are anxious because of the pressure" ー but you are emotionally neutral or calm about it.

emotional (or affective) empathy . . .

ー emotional empathy is feeling with someone. this is when you actually feel the other person's emotions, as if you were experiencing it yourself.

ー example: your friend bursts into tears after a breakup. as you comfort them, you suddenly feel heavy, heartbroken, and your own tears start to well up, even though it's not your breakup.

ー how it feels: your emotional state mirrors theirs. it might feel automatic and intense, almost as if you are "catching" their emotion.

compassionate empathy . . .

ー compassionate empathy is feeling and acting to help. this type of empathy combines understanding & emotional feeling, with the desire to help and take action.

ー example: you see someone on the street shivering without a coat in the winter. you feel bad for them (emotional empathy) and feel motivated to give them your scarf/buy them something warm (action).

ー how it feels: there is a strong pull in your chest, an urge to do something to ease another person's suffering or problems.

why is being naturally unempathetic considered rude. I'm sympathetic, I care, why is that not enough?