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THANK YOU I HATE THIS GUY WITH ALL OF MY HEART
do you think he deserves to burn
yes
✩ "I would get killed by your hands just to see you live." .:｡✧*.｡✰───
summary: he loved you so much he allowed you to let him go.
contents: jjk as angst tropes series: choso kamo, choso x f!reader, established relationship, not canon so no spoilers cz i realized its called fanFICTION so i can create whatever i want, forbidden romance, choso dies cz of reader, fluff at the beginning, angst cz who wouldve guessed, also written badly
word count: ≈1.9k
The moon generously illuminated the darkness of the abandoned building. It was just like the way you knew it. You memorized every curve of it, how the light would hit each spot, the way the debris stacked on top of each other–and where you would see him standing there, waiting for you.
It started when you two both approached each other, thinking you guys were the same species. He thought you were a curse, and you thought he was a sorcerer. It caused you two to share the struggles you both had, and unbeknownst to both of you, it was similar struggles. It caused mutual pining that you both could only entertain.
You both found out when you first met him in your jujutsu uniform, and he saw the badge that you had. It was a shocking sight to see, but Choso had gently held your hand, calming you down once you found out he was a curse.
Now, you were meeting up with him secretly once again.
“Hello,” you giggled, your shoulders rising up and failing to keep your bubbly attitude hidden. You took your hat off, bringing your mask under your chin.
“Hello, darling,” he walked up to you, his eyes glued to your face. Stepping in front of you, he brought his free hand up to your face and tucked a hair behind your ear. “You look… as beautiful as last time,”
A sound of laughter bubbled up your throat, leaning into his hand. Choso held your hand, guiding you to the usual spot you guys would sit in that faced the moonlight. Ever since finding out about the opportunity of meeting you secretly, Choso had cleaned up a spot that the moonlight focused on, adding a carpet there and occasionally, candles. It was a spot where you two could lean against the wall, cuddling each other and forgetting the world really existed.
“A movie?” Choso asked softly.
“Yeah! I watched one with a friend today!”
Choso laughed, watching as you used your whole body to reenact the scenes and the story–he thought it was enchanting
“You think… we could watch a movie someday?” he asked sincerely, his gaze on you.
You sighed, squeezing his hand softly and leaning back onto him. “...Someday, Choso.” “You think that day will come?” He whispered, his tone vulnerable.
“One day, Choso. I’ll take you everywhere–the park, the mall, amusement parks–oh! We could go to festivals! Tokyo holds them all the time,” you chuckled, hoping to shift his mood into a more cheerful one. Your smile only got wider when you saw his cheeks rising at the grin painted across his face.
“And our wedding?” He teased, bringing your hand up and kissing the back of it.
“I already have plans,” you nuzzled your nose against his, a second of silence passing before you guys erupted in laughter.
It was an endearing sight. You two laughing at each other's shenanigans, acting like you were two highschoolers on a date–nothing else mattered.
Time eventually caught up, and it was time to leave.
“Next week, same time?” He asked, his voice hopeful even though he already knew your answer.
“Always.”
~~~
“You want me to… what?”
Yaga raised an eyebrow at your question, putting his clipboard down and looking at you.
“We can’t afford to keep any Cursed Womb alive. Choso Kamo is a liability, and for all we know, he could be getting even stronger as we speak.”
Clenching your fists, your chest rose up and down in an uneven pattern, and sweat was prickling at the sides of your head.
“But the others are dead? How powerful is Choso alone–,”
“His powers are much stronger due to his cursed energy. There’s no doubt that he’d be giving you guys a hard time on your missions, and we aren’t going to risk it.” His answer was so certain, so sure that you shook. You shook, because none of it was sinking in. Every atom of your body denied it–Choso dying? Because of you?
Yaga noticed your silence, and he sighed. Grabbing his clipboard again and standing up, he spoke.
“If you think the mission’s too much for you, then I can assign it to another student.”
Your head snapped up at him. No–no one else could kill him. No one else should kill Choso–Choso shouldn’t even be killed! Choso was human–you know it. You’d know all of it. How he made you feel more human than the jujutsu society ever had, that he’d shared your feelings and troubles and love and affection–
But, if you didn’t take it, then someone else would. If you didn’t kill him, he’d die anyway. If he didn’t die by your hands… someone’s bound to give him a painful death. Someone else is going to cause him harm in his last moments. And you’d miss it all.
The thought of it made your head throb. Your pulse raced enough for you to hear it in your ears. You were anxious about him getting hurt–being shown no mercy before his death when it was all he deserved. Mercy.
“I… I’ll take it.”
This way, you can ensure he has a quick, painless death.
Yaga hummed, nodding in satisfaction. “Very well then, the deadline is next week.”
~~~
This mission was easy. Physically. And you hated it. You hated it because it was as easy as depending on your love for each other to meet with him and only take advantage of it. You came here early this time, wanting to be the first one to see Choso… and the last time you would.
“Hey,” he arrived, beaming. And the sight hurt. Tonight, you had to carry his blood. A rope in your chest tightened, and your breath staggered.
“I… got you something. You like roses, right?” He revealed a rose from behind his back, holding it out to you both proudly and timidly.
Your eyes went wide. The crimson rose would soon be the color spreading throughout Choso’s fabric, because of you. Taking the rose felt like a lie. Rejecting it would betray you. Choso always did small and cute things like this. For you.
Choso noticed your intense gaze at the rose, as if you’d just seen something you shouldn’t have. Your uncharacteristic mannerisms–hands shaking, frozen in spot, completely mute–it worried him.
“Hey, are you okay? You’re not usually this quiet… Did you have a rough mission?”
A rough mission? You almost scoffed, but when he brought his hand up to your cheek, you hesitated. For a split second, you almost recoiled, backed away. The gentleness of his touch would hurt too much right now. You didn’t mean to, but when your gaze flickered up to Choso’s, his anguished expression only increased your regret.
Choso noticed the weight on your shoulders. He noticed that there was pressure on you, and you couldn’t fight against it. He knew there was something you had to say, or something you had to do… and he knew you couldn’t tell him it. With the way a lump in your throat was forming and causing you to stay silent, he speaks.
“If… there’s anything you need to say or do, do it right now, my love.”
His sweet words combined with his tender actions–it broke you. Tears finally started flooding out, and your voice hiccupped quietly in your throat. Your hesitation said everything–you were shaking, crying–you silently begged him to say something different.
But he was steady. Calm. Almost too calm. Because how could he, who was absolutely ignorant about the situation, not knowing that you were about to end his life, still be so kind as he pulled you into a hug that you so desperately needed? Choso was giving you space to choose–no, space to do it. And you knew you had to, because if you didn’t, it’d end up much worse for him.
“Don’t–no, please–I can’t, Choso–,” you begged the world.
“My love,” he says firmly, not wavering from his point. “I trust you.”
And it felt like your breaking point. It felt like everything inside you snapped–your heart, your tears–and your muscles moved without thought.
Before you knew it, your weapon was buried deep inside of Choso’s stomach. Blood emanated from where the knife was hidden, and Choso collapsed onto you.
“No!” You caught him, his blood slowly dripping from his clothes down to your hands.
The way his eyes went wide broke your heart, and even with your sudden betrayal he was still holding onto you for dear life. How could you? How could you?
Choso still somehow found the courage to chuckle even at a time like this, while blood was dripping from the corners of his lips. “This… wasn’t what I was expecting.”
“No, no! Choso!” You brought him to your chest, begging the universe to go back in time–you’d refuse the mission, refuse to end Choso and run away with him instead–so why’d that only occur now? When he was slowly losing life right in front of you?
“I’m sorry… I’m so sorry…” your tears mixed with the blood that was staining his clothes, yet the knife was still in him. Your betrayal was still in him. And it slowly spilled throughout his body–yet his love was still greater.
‘Hey, hey, my love. Listen to me–,”
“No, I’m so sorry–I shouldn’t have done this–I should’ve just–,”
“Y/N.”
You opened your eyes and looked at him through tears. How was he comforting you? When you ended his life? He had dreams, struggles, passions, and someone he loved.
“Yes…?” You whispered, your eyes closing the moment his hand gently brushed your cheek.
“Don’t let them paint you the monster, my love,” he smiled–the one you loved. “I know you chose to save me one last time. I would’ve chosen you out of everyone else to be the one to end me.”
But you were a monster. But you were someone who deserves nothing of his gentle love. Someone who was deemed a murderer–yet all he gave in his last moments was gentle love.
“I love you, my love,” he smiled. “Say it back one last time, yeah?”
You tried your best to scoff, trying to match his eerily lighthearted mood as you kissed his forehead. “I love you too, Choso.”
The two of you closed your eyes, pressing your foreheads together–in hopes for you to give him the life he deserves and the one you don’t. When you felt his hand slip from your cheek, you quickly caught it and tried to savour the last bits of warmth in it, convincing yourself he was just unconscious. You felt the smear of cold blood from the wind–only to remind you that it was his blood.
You were broken. You felt nothing but misery. The air you were breathing, the eyes that you were using to cry tears you felt like you didn’t deserve to let out, how your muscles contracted as you sobbed–it should’ve belonged to Choso. The Choso who never had the chance to live out any of his dreams. The Choso who never had the privileges you had growing up–it should’ve belonged to him. Not you. You felt like you should’ve been the one to take the dagger instead, and even then–you’d still paint yourself the monster. Because now, that’s all you saw of yourself.
a/n
oookay i kNOWWW this was kinda fast paced but i try my best to keep this series under 2k words sooooo it kinda ended up that way... i wish i couldve expanded more on this but oh! well! too! bad! (sobbing) ANYWAYS thisssss lowkey hurt me–i dealt with what felt like ages and ages of writers block and had to force this out of my system and somehow was able to produce something decently satisfying in the end soooo i hope i broke yall :)
(imma be honest w yall tho the original ending was to make the reader end herself in the end too but i thought maybe that’s too much…)
hope you all enjoyed *✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ: !!! - ying ☆
my mom won’t freaking let me dye my hair purple because she likes my red hair but i wnat purple but she thinks it looks ugly 😡😡 its ok tho itll take like a minute to convince her
purple will eventually fade to this reddish orangeish pinkish thing but YESS LETS BE MATCHING PURPLE BUDDIES 😋😋😋
✩ "I hate everything and everyone, but you.".:｡✧*.｡✰───
summary: in which megumi's the second lead, yuuji's the first.
contents: jjk as angst tropes series, f!reader x yuuji, megumi as the second lead, hurt/comfort(?), unrequited love
word count: ≈1.2k
If anyone knew anything about Megumi, it was that he claimed he hated a lot of things, but he never actually meant it.
For example–to this day, he still hates the way Gojo chose to move Itadori’s room right next to his. Deep down, he liked it, and everyone around him knew that.
Or the other time Yuuji saw him eye-ing a book in the library, only to get it for him the next day. Yuuji saw right through Megumi’s narrowed eyes and “Why’d you waste your time getting this for me?” statement and the gratitude behind it carried them.
Another example can be the way Gojo surprises him with random gifts after his shopping–it wasn’t Megumi’s love language (he denied having one), but Gojo’s six eyes wouldn’t miss how his expression softened whenever he’d receive the item.
“I truly hate it,” Megumi would retort.
“Sure you do,” Gojo would chuckle, ruffling the black-haired boy’s hair. Gojo knew past all that toughness he put up was a soft and tender heart, and he wished Megumi would be in touch with it one day.
Well, until you came.
Megumi truly hated the fact that ever since you transferred to jujutsu high, you’ve taken up more of his mind than he wanted it to. Gojo noticed this too, actually. Sure, Megumi thought you were just a good friend, much like Kugisaki and Itadori. However, he couldn’t deny the way he stuttered and lost his cool demeanour around you–every uncharacteristic slip of his composure bothered him. He truly hated the way his heart throbbed out of his chest whenever he’d speak to you, and the blush Gojo always called him out on whenever you were even slightly mentioned.
Being in the same year as you, it didn’t make things easier for Megumi. And he hated it, truly.
Megumi truly hated the way he couldn’t simply hold your hand, or utter the words “I love you” to you. Couldn’t place a kiss on your forehead whenever you two spent your time alone together—or even in a crowd. But worse, he hated how you wouldn’t notice just the inner turmoil and dilemma of emotions every time you did a simple and friendly action like patting his back or shaking his hand.
Megumi truly hated the way that the only person who noticed his feelings were his sensei, and that the feelings were so overpoweringly strong and painful that he’d allow Gojo to see such a vulnerable side of him as his voice shook when ranting to Gojo about you. He hated the way Gojo would actually drop his cocky and playful demeanor to comfort him, even though he truly needed it.
Megumi truly hated the way you always smiled when you were with Yuuji–not that he had anything against you two, but he wished you’d smile that way with him. He hated the way he would observe the bond between you and Yuuji growing. Warm, bright, and comfortable. He’d wish you’d shift your way closer to him instead of Yuuji whenever you guys were in a group setting, or lean in closer when you’d laugh with him instead of Yuuji. He’d wish you’d also use his first name too, not only just for Yuuji.
Fushiguro truly hated the way he’d still care for you. He listened to your rants about how your heart would beat at the sight of his best friend. He’d noticed your favorite drinks and food way before Yuuji did. He always brought you an umbrella when you didn’t check the weather forecast. He’d hold back slightly whenever he was training with you to make sure he wouldn’t hurt you–he hated that he still cared.
But what Fushiguro truly hated the most was the way your eyes lit up when you announced that you were dating Yuuji. The heartache that felt like an arrow of mockery and sorrow when you told him that you were dating Yuuji–he even impressed himself when he was able to hide it behind a shrug and a mumbled “Congrats, now I have to deal with you two even more.”
He’d silently retreat to his room after the announcement, not being able to hold in the pain he felt seeing you kiss Yuuji on the cheek. He wasn’t surprised that Gojo was following him the whole time. After all, Gojo was the only one who knew. Who could’ve hid anything from those darn six eyes?
Gojo didn’t ask him what was wrong–he knew. He’d close the door in Fushiguro’s dorm after entering, holding his arms out to the boy. Once Fushiguro turned back and saw the open arms, he’d truly hate the next moments of stumbling before clutching onto Gojo’s clothes as he tried to contain his tears. He’d truly hate the way Gojo turned off his infinity for him, rubbing his back comfortingly as the broken hearted boy choked back muffled sobs. He truly hated the way he buried his face deep into Gojo’s shirt, gripping it messily and clumsily as the tears poured out, feeling like that was his only illusion that he was still in control of himself. He truly hated the way that Gojo knew everything that was going through his head without him verbalizing it. “It’s okay, just let it out, Megs,” Gojo would whisper into Megumi’s ears–which he truly hated, no matter how much he needed to hear it. The words would only trigger more tears, and the two were on the floor as Megumi wrapped his arms tighter around Gojo, his voice ripping so tragically from his throat it felt like skin being peeled off.
The heartache hurt much more than the tears that came out–and he’d truly hate the way he was grateful for how considerate Gojo was.
But ultimately, he’d hate the way he wasn’t better for you. The way he felt like he wasn’t enough. The way he felt like his lack of a cheerful spirit, lack of a strong soul, the way he didn’t know how to express his emotions, the way he wasn’t like Yuuji—the way he didn’t confess first when he had the time to–that all of it was probably the reason why you fell in love with Yuuji and not him. He hated all of it. It hurt. It hurt so much. It hurt him. It–
“It hurts,” He muttered so quietly that Gojo almost didn’t pick it up.
“I know, Megs," Gojo whispered gently. "But do you hate her?” Gojo asked, rubbing Fushiguro’s back.
Megumi didn’t even realize that he had spoken out all his thoughts through choked sobs and incoherent crying, but nothing seemed more important than you at the moment. Not even his own feelings.
“No…” He whispered, his voice wavered. “But this… this is the worst curse I’ve ever faced,” He replied, pulling his head out of Gojo’s chest as he messily wiped his tears. He tore all the tears and words out, and yet it felt like it wasn’t enough. because it was never going to be for however long he loved you. It felt like there was more than just tears and incoherent sobs of pain to let out, yet he couldn’t figure out why. He couldn’t figure anything out right now—not even you.
“You were right, love is the most twisted curse of all.”
a/n:
so this hurt. I cried in this one the most bc megumi is my FAV BOY IN JJK and writing this hurt me... i truly hated it :,). smh. megumi my boy ily and i will always choose you :(. hope you all enjoyed :,D
(I'm gonna need to start some wholesome series for myself to recover from this series or else this'll be my 13th reason AHAHAHA)
hope you all enjoyed, ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ: !!! - ying ☆
thank you so much for the tag. i love you.
tagging: anyone who'd like to join!
what color is your aura?
no pressure tags: @thekinslayed @connorsui @sarahsangelicdoll @rafeysbangs @angelspitxx @wicked-barbie @deadonyouraccount @rafescorpsebride
WAIT NO I SWEAR I REMEMBER YOU FROM SOMEWHERE AND I KEEP ON CHECKING YOUR PROFILE AND WONDERING IF YOUR USER IS SPELLED GUNIMS OR GUMINS BUT IT'S GUMIMS
OMG HI NEW MOOT!!! I LOVE YOUR WORKS WHAT??? RAAAGGHH
HI NEW MUTUAL!!!!
pls omg i’m literally in french class rn smiling so hard..
I LOVED YOUR MEGUMI FIC TOO!!!!!! i saw that you’re also canadian🤭🤭
fun fact i've been stalking your account since august :3 i was SO excited when i saw that you followed me back ! !
OMG HI NEW MOOT!!! I LOVE YOUR WORKS WHAT??? RAAAGGHH
HI NEW MUTUAL!!!!
pls omg i’m literally in french class rn smiling so hard..
I LOVED YOUR MEGUMI FIC TOO!!!!!! i saw that you’re also canadian🤭🤭
whatthufcuk shO CUTTEE CHOSO BIGSPOON CHOSO BIG SPOON CHOSO BIGSPOON!!!!!
it's a garden life
choso kamo x reader (college au, no curses)
a/n: wrote a lil fluffy domestic choso fic! can't believe i haven't written for choso yet i love him sososososo much he's so cute :3 in my dreams i live in a cute apartment with him. also in my head he studies psych and bio at uni idk why it just makes sense in my head but this isn't relvevant to the plot don't worry this lowkey has no plot LOL
word count: 782 masterlist
contains: established relationship, no curses au, college au, gender neutral reader, choso's style is implied to be alt, choso is cute (as always), kissing, cuddling, reader wears his clothes, choso calls r "baby", idk what else
you love Thursdays, purely for the fact that you never have any classes. it's like a mini mid-week weekend, a break for which you're often very grateful. however, on this particular Thursday, you're kind of bored. not that you didn't have things you could do, but because you'd usually have a lie in with your boyfriend, choso, since he didn't have classes until the afternoon. well, except for today, because he had both morning and afternoon classes, which meant it had just been you in your shared apartment for most of the day. and although he'd smothered you with kisses like he always did before he left, it was hard not to miss his presence.
you'd spent your day doing nothing in particular, just finishing small tasks and completing anything you hadn't yet finished for whichever classes you had the next day. now, it was nearing early evening, and you were lying on the sofa wearing one of choso's many oversized hoodies, half watching reruns of a random sitcom, half wondering when choso would come back. as a myriad of thoughts swirled through your mind, you hear the door click and creak slightly as it opens, the sound making you jump.
"hi baby!" choso calls out brightly from the front door. you can almost perfectly envision his everything he does as he does it - the way he takes his chunky boots off, hangs his jacket up, unties his hair and puts his hair ties on the small table in the hallway. reinvigorated, you leap up, running towards the front door, half sliding through the hallway thanks to your fluffy socks.
"cho!" you exclaim, practically jumping into his arms as you greet him in the corridor, only metres from the front door. he squeezes you, holding you tight. "you're back early?" you question, tangling your fingers in the long, soft strands of his hair as he presses soft kisses to your neck and shoulder. he laughs warmly, and the sound vibrates, washing over you like the comfort of a weighted blanket.
"i missed you. so i found a way to leave class early." he says honestly, slipping his hand into yours.
you laugh. "as much as i love that you did that, please tell me you didn't get into any trouble." you say, a teasing lilt to your voice.
"no, i, uh... i told the professor i was ill. i'm surprised he bought it, to be honest." he says, slight embarrassment flashing across his face for a moment. he looks down, his cheeks flushing a pretty shade of pale pink. it's certainly not the worst thing in the world, but choso's never done something like that, and he feels a little silly about it until you push the thoughts out of his mind with a kiss.
he kisses you back softly, trailing one hand to your waist while the other finds yours, and he swears he can feel all of his worries melt away from the feeling of your lips on his. he backs you into the wall, sliding his hand up from your waist to rest behind your head to ensure you don't hurt yourself. your heart swells at the gesture, and you grip his hand a little tighter before pulling away. you're met with the sight of choso breathing heavily, lips a little redder than before as he smiles at you, starry-eyed.
he presses a soft kiss to your forehead. "i'm going to change, then i'll join you in the living room, yeah?" he asks, and you nod in confirmation. you peck his cheek, and he smiles before heading off into the bedroom. meanwhile, you reassume your position on the sofa, grabbing choso's favourite blanket before sinking into the pillows. as you flick through the channels to find some kind of background noise, eventually settling on a rerun of the same sitcom as before, choso enters the room clad in some dark grey sweatpants and an old baggy band t-shirt. you make a mental note to yourself to steal that from him at some point.
choso flops down on the sofa, half smothering you in the best way. you laugh as he wriggles around, trying to reposition himself. eventually, he takes what one could only describe as his rightful place, as the big spoon. he makes sure the blanket is over both of you before he slides his arms around you and pulls you in against his body, nuzzling his head into your neck.
"i don't wanna move. ever." he murmurs, wrapping his legs around you, clinging to you like a koala.
"who says we have to?" you say, half rhetorically.
so you don't. why would you want to, anyways?
THIS IS SO ADORABLEE my heart melted
can't sleep (unless i'm with you)
megumi fushiguro x reader
a/n: lil blurb for my favourite boy's birthday!! happy birthday megs ily thank u for existing even though ur fictional u make my days so much better <3 anyways this is inspired by the fact that i have not been sleeping too well lately and i wish he was there with me lol
word count: 572 words masterlist
despite bringing you a multitude of amazing things that you were beyond grateful for, being a sorcerer came with numerous struggles, and sleepless nights weren't something you were unused to. tonight happened to be one of those, and in spite of how exhausted you are, it's as if your brain is refusing to switch itself off.
you can feel a million thoughts running through your mind. even after trying almost everything that usually helps you fall asleep, you still lie there, eyes closed, mind far too awake. now, there's only one more thing you could try.
your finger hovers over megumi's contact as you contemplate once more. you didn't want to disturb him - he had had just as exhausting a day as you had - but truly, there may be nothing else that could possibly help you avoid lying awake until you were driven to insanity. biting the bullet, you hit the call button, and it starts ringing. thankfully, megumi isn't too heavy a sleeper; he's barely ever slept through an alarm, so chances are he'll hear it. after a few moments that seem to drag out into eternity, he picks up.
"hey, you okay?" megumi asks, voice barely above a whisper, though you can hear the concern in his words.
"hi. sorry, i'm fine, i just, uh, i can't sleep..." you whisper back, trailing off. "i'm sorry, i shouldn't have disturbed you." you continue, barely audible.
you hear some rustling on the other end of the line before megumi responds.
"don't apologise. i get it." he stops for a moment. "do you want me come to your room or do you want to come here?" he asks, direct as ever, his voice rough and gravelly with sleep.
you're silent for a few seconds. "can you come here? please?" you ask softly, and he can picture you, facing the wall as you curl up into your duvet.
"sure. i'll be there in a couple minutes. see you in a sec."
a small smile creeps onto your face. "thank you, megs. i-"
but before you can finish your sentence, the line is cut.
before you know it, there's a soft knock at your door as megumi taps the pattern only he uses. it started as a silly little joke, but it has its uses - being able to tell that it's him at your door is beyond reassuring.
you are, of course, met with your beloved boyfriend as you open the door. his hair is a little flattened on top and fluffier than usual on the sides as a result of sleep, and you can't help but feel a little guilty for waking him up. he pulls you in to him, and you rest you head on his shoulder as his hands press into your back.
"don't feel bad for waking me up. i'd rather be here with you, anyway." megumi whispers, as if he can read your mind. you whisper a quiet thanks, and pull away from him, grabbing his hand to lead him to your bed. he lets you get in first, then takes up his position behind you once you're comfortable, lying on your side. he tucks his head into your shoulder and slides his arms around your torso, tangling a leg with yours.
"goodnight. i love you, angel."
"i love you too, megs."
unsurprisingly, falling asleep is a lot easier when he's there. and you know he'll come anytime you call.