Murdoc - Blog Posts

oh boi 🌚🌝

🙈🙈🙈

~~~2doc~~~

my first hоrny art omg 🌚🌝

oh boi I really like this sketch~

MurDAD and his asian daughter 👌🏼

Decided to design my version of Uncle Marvin for the Rejects AU!

Ace’s adoptive father and Murdoc’s uncle. 💫🌟

How Ace actually met Murdoc (pt 2)

⚠️TW for blood, physical abuse, injury, and homophobia⚠️

TLDR: I think they’re relationship is very interesting because of the fact of how morally gray the two of them are. I don’t support them being together in current phases but I believe they were together at some point in phases 1 and 2. Those guys have too many instances of blatant queercoded flirting where they could not not have feelings towards one another. I also believe the roles that were once present in their relationship (2-D has crush on Murdoc but Murdoc rejects him.) are now in the midst of being reversed, (Murdoc has a crush on 2-D but 2-D rejects him.) most likely as the result of the ending we got during the Lost Chord MV.

Oh definitely. Although, I’d like to say while I’m not the biggest 2doc fan, I definitely believe that they probably had a relationship at some point in the lore. A majority of their interactions within phase 1 to 2 just doesn’t make sense if they didn’t, but that’s entirely my opinion. However, I don’t like how some people within the Gorillaz fandom tend to paint their relationship as a completely black and white thing. Like I feel like many just say “the two of them of them are deeply in love and have always been together” or “the relationship is toxic and it’s gross” but like with how nuanced the lore has been up to this point, wouldn’t it make more sense if it was both? Like, relationships are much more complicated than just being in love or being toxic, and I feel like it’s been clearly shown how gray their relationship is.

Like, the two of them aren’t angels. (especially Murdoc)

Murdoc, even though he was a victim of both child and sexual abuse, he later became an abuser. Whether it be because of:

His alcoholism, which has been made clear he uses as a coping mechanism for his abuse.

A lack of treatment of his trauma, especially due to the generation his was born in, wherein it was expected for men not to share their feelings or trauma due to societal pressure, aka: toxic masculinity or his refusal to acknowledge said problems due to not wanting to revisit those memories.

He has learned to hate himself so much that he has become the thing he hated. In his own words from the Plastic Beach interview, “In order to fight monsters, you have to become a monster of some sort yourself. Take out all the soft, fluffy bits and become empty.”

His overall need to control every aspect of his life and those around him since he wasn’t able to stop the abuse as a child. (Ex: He pursued music because he wanted to make it the way he wanted to and not let his father control which road he went down. He considers himself the leader of Gorillaz so no one else can control what he does with them. Murdoc hyper-sexualizing himself in some instances might be the result of another coping mechanism. If he controls what he does with his body he doesn’t have to think about his trauma associated with sex, which is a rare but not uncommon trait amongst victims of sexual assault.)

It’s most likely a combination of some, if not all of the above.

2-D has his own fair share of problems as well.

He is a well-known drug addict with a liking to painkillers and references to him also doing cocaine. His addiction only amping up after meeting Murdoc, however it’s questionable as to whether or not this was because Murdoc helped enable his pre-existing addiction to painkillers or if this was a result of 2-D’s own codependency.

He’s both a victim and enabler as he consistently, from Phase 1 to 2 and some instances in 4, makes excuses for or straight up doesn’t acknowledge Murdoc’s abuse towards him and the other band members and allows it to continue for nearly 20 years.

While known to be quite humble and kind, he can be quite petty and can have quite the ego. (Ex: Literally look at his behavior in several interviews and how he treated the band during Phase 5. Also, in We Are The Dury, 2-D makes a joke about Murdoc as he recounts his time being imprisoned Mexico saying, “I don’t think I could eat another burrito in my life.” To which 2-D responds with “But you still like a bit of Mexican sausage, ay man?” and proceeds to laugh. This is most likely in reference to the MTV Mexican Jail ident where a prisoner is about to sexually assault Murdoc as the video cuts off. Murdoc, upset by 2-D’s remark, he tells him to shut up and calls him the f-slur.)

He has been shown to become physically abusive towards Murdoc, however this is only when pushed to his very limits. (Ex: During the infamous Plastic Beach Interview, he can be heard attacking Murdoc after he mentioned Paula Cracker before Murdoc managed to overpower and chloroform 2-D into submission.)

Now, of course. This doesn’t mean that one of them is entirely the villain and the other is a complete saint. That just isn’t the true nature of their relationship. The two of them are innately complex and thus their relationship is filled to the brim with ambiguity. They are neither good or bad people. They are simply characters with very human problems and emotions. The both of them are simply too fucked up with each other to continue a healthy dynamic.

Personally, I think they did love each other at some point, probably more around phase 1 or 2 but it certainly wasn’t overtly romantic or happy. The two of them were clearly codependent. Whether it’s 2-D who comes crawling back to Murdoc because he feels he could fix his problems if he stays with him or forgives him, believing he could change and they could be happy together only for that thought come crashing down once the El Mañana incident occurred. Or Murdoc, who not only continues this stringing 2-D along, especially with that fact that he not only needs him for the band to keep existing but also, in a more sad twist, he’s probably the only person that has outwardly shown any kind of genuine affection towards him. 2-D’s essentially his safety net, an excuse for him to continue being shitty because he keeps forgiving him. For the longest time, he didn’t want forgiveness for his actions, he just doesn’t want to believe that he’s a bad person. No one wants to believe they’re a bad person unless they’re put into a situation that makes them actively question their own actions. And for a long time Murdoc refused to do that. Possibly another reason as to why he showed so much vitriol towards 2-D is because of how lucky he felt he was.

I’m surprised this doesn’t get brought up more often when discussing their relationship. Like, 2-D literally lived the life that Murdoc never had. He’s part of a loving nuclear family that accepts him for who he is, he was popular in school, probably was never bullied, had good looks, and a job. His life was practically given to him on a silver platter while Murdoc got to live with the scraps. His whole life, Murdoc suffered to get where he is. Why did he get to live such a happy, carefree life but not him? He wanted to hate 2-D for all of those reasons, but couldn’t because he didn’t want to let go of the one person who cared about him. And now, due to his actions, has to face the consequences of 2-D leaving him behind.

That’s probably why we’re getting bits of his reputation arc now. He’s in the midst of addressing his problems. Not all of them, of course. He is one stubborn bastard after all. But I believe that after breaking out of prison in Phase 5, he realized how much 2-D and by extension, the band, really meant to him. While yes, he did go to prison and later lied when the attention was off him. In response, he started the Free Murdoc movement. It was only after seeing Noodle run to Patagonia, believing his lies and putting herself in danger because of his fib, he began to realize that he was in the wrong. Not just then but for everything. He said it himself at the end of the Free Murdoc chat;

“Cos in the end, the experience DID free me. Not from Wormwood Scrubs — but from that other far worse prison I was in… MYSELF. The worst prison a person can be in… I was in a prison of my own making, but thanks to you — I’ve busted out. This long, long journey has made me a better man.”

And with that he swore to change. We even see him realizing how much his actions had impact in Phase 6. Since making the Now Now, 2-D has finally learned to move on without him. Plastic Beach might have been the moment he realized how fucked up their relationship was but the Now Now was the moment he stood up against the abuse and won. Murdoc noticing this, did everything to get his attention at first. He made him tea and even went out with him but nothing worked. That’s why we see him crying in Desole, he knows that whatever relationship he and 2-D or the band before will never be the same. It’s only when he actively proved himself to the band and that he did care for them that 2-D reached out of the portal to rescue him in Lost Chord. I don’t think he forgave him for what he put him through or that they’re gonna start over again, but it’s a sign that the two of them are improving themselves and that’s good!

I do have to wonder with this current phase though if their roles are reversed because before, 2-D was the one that was openly showed love for Murdoc while he rejected 2-D’s advances at nearly every turn. But now I think that’s been switched. Now Murdoc, of all people, is chasing him while 2-D, someone who’s been idolizing Murdoc for years, doesn’t acknowledge him. I mean, look at their playlists on Spotify right now. In G-Mix 17, almost all of Murdoc’s songs have been about UNREQUITED LOVE (the strongest examples being R&B by English Teacher, Security by Amyl and the Sniffers, Hung Up by The Mysterines, and Landline by Binki) whereas 2-D’s have been about FALLING OUT OF IT. (Examples being YKWIM by Yot Club, Not Into You by Brooksie, and Anybody Else But U by poolsideconvo) It’s almost like they are finally beginning to meet in the middle and mend somewhat but Murdoc has (at least so far) been slowly beginning to accept that he actually likes him but knows that 2-D has already moved on?? I’m really excited to see how their relationship improves going forward as it’s been really interesting to see their development in the last two phases so far.

Sorry about the incredibly long rant, I just love it when there’s genuinely good subtext and complex nuance into characters’ psyches, especially when done well.

Love how in past phases 2D admired Murdoc but in certain interviews I feel like Murdoc is (not so) secretly attracted to 2D as in lust. While 2D is just completely oblivious most of the time

Oh no yeah facts, you don't call someone A LITERAL GOD and a pretty boy if you feel normally about them. 2-D is definitely oblivious, but so is Murdoc I think. Their dynamic was always stupidly complicated, and it only spiraled further phases 3 and 5. They don't even know what they have going on, really- and that's okay! relationships don't have to be perfect. to deny those kinds of relationships are real and normal is immature and only stifles awareness and enables people not to recognize toxic behaviour.

anyway I went off but that's my hot take on 2doc

✨❤️‍🔥Exclusive Interview with The Rejects’ guitarist, producer, and lead singer — Cynthia (formerly Cyborg Noodle) ❤️‍🔥✨

Interviewer: Hello there, Ms. Cyborg Noodle. How are you?

Cynthia: Oh, I don’t go by that name anymore.

I: Oh. My apologies, I wasn’t informed. What do you go by now?

C: Don’t worry about it too much, you didn’t know. I get that a lot anyway. I’ve been going by Cynthia more recently. Don’t know if I’ll keep it just yet but my friends seem to like it so maybe I might.

I: Well, it is a very pretty name. Anyway, shall we get started?

C: Yes, let’s.

I: Okay, first of all, let’s go back to the beginning. Tell us how you came up with The Rejects. How did this all start?

C: That’s kind of a loaded question, isn’t it? [laughs] Well, after my swift departure from Gorillaz back in 2010 thanks to Murdoc (that bastard) abandoning ship as it were, I floated along the open sea for several years. I pretty much shut down completely after the first three. Couldn’t tell you how I even managed to be alive for so long without power or spare parts, though. Guess if I were to thank my creator for one thing, it’d have to be a long-lasting battery life. Anyway, when I woke up, I realized I had washed up onto U.S soil. Well, more specifically a landfill, which in hindsight was pretty ironic. But regardless, I was saved by man who lived there alone. Apparently, he gave me some spare parts that were there as well as his vocal cords just so I could live. I had never met anybody who was filled with so much compassion for a stranger before. Then again, I was never shown much compassion in my decade long existence. So he became my friend almost instantly. We lived on that landfill for years until we managed to fix up a beat up 2003 Pacifica and we drove that across the country. Through that journey, we basically came up with the name ourselves. We both realized that were just projects that were thrown away by our creators. Nobody wanted us because we were associated with memories that people just wanted to forget. Thus, "The Rejects“ were born and the rest is history.

(Poster from their first concert at the Demon Dayz Festival LA 2018 before being subsequently canceled due to technical difficulties)

I: Fascinating... do you think that last statement still applies now to the current state of your band, now that there's four of you?

C: Oh definitely. Maybe not in the same sense, but it we still find comfort in each other that way. We've grown comfortable with the uncomfortable, so to speak. We're people who don't fit into a defined label and we very much like it that way.

I: That’s all very inspiring to hear. Going back to some things you said earlier; it sounds like you have some contempt for what happened to you during your time with Gorillaz. So tell me, how did the temporary Gorillaz bassist, Ace D. Copular get into the picture?

C: I had no idea Ace was involved with Gorillaz during the time we met him. In fact, me and Lenny weren’t intending to add a new member since we were pretty content in doing all the music ourselves. But he gave us a place to stay in his duplex when we visited Townsville and he had some really great skills on bass, so we just invited him on. He originally was just a manager for our shows but eventually he started doing bass with us and we had a really fun time. We didn’t find out that he used to be a part of Gorillaz until 2-D came along. Like, when we moved in initially, we were pretty worried about rent but he assured us that he would pay it all himself since he got — in his words, not mine, ”a substantial pay raise thanks to [his] latest gig” and we didn’t realize his little ”gig” was working with Gorillaz until we met his new boy-toy. (No offense, ’D) Wouldn’t call that a gig with a band as big as them but to each their own, I guess.

I: Well, what about 2-D? How did he end up joining The Rejects?

C: Well, he’s a different story. I was pretty reluctant for him to join originally. Not because I associated him with what happened to me, of course. In fact, I see him as a victim more than anything else. I admit it. I did some fucked up shit to him back then. I mean, I was programmed to do those things by Murdoc at the time but I still perpetuated the cycle of abuse on that island. In my mind, it was my fault that I didn’t do anything to prevent it from continuing. I don’t know if it was truly me or the bullet hole that I gained on my head during my time on Plastic Beach, but seeing him being broken bit by bit as we held him captive… That made me develop a concious. Seeing him change so vividly before my eyes and replaying those moments in what was left in my memory banks made me question what role I was meant to play in this world. Was being some bodyguard; unfeeling, stagnant, all that I was meant for? What more could I accomplish in life without needing the aid of a gun? It was very eye-opening experience for me. When I met 2-D again, I was more afraid that I could potentially hurt him again. I didn’t expect him to forgive me, I just hoped he and the rest of Gorillaz were doing better without me in the picture. But to my surprise, he forgave me. I thought it would’ve been satisfying to hear but it still felt unearned. I still feel that way a little bit, if I’m honest. I was just glad to know that he was living a happier life than before. I’m sure you’ll talk all about his journey with him but if I can say one thing in defense for him. The man deserves a happy ending after all the shit he’s been through.

I: Hmm… Good to know. Let’s switch this conversation up a bit. How would you describe your music now compared to when you were starting out in early 2017?

C: I’d say there’s been a huge tonal shift compared to what me and Lenny were making before and what all of us are making now. That’s partly due to 2-D’s expertise in production. I don’t know how a veteran like him could improve so much since The Now Now but really, it’s almost surreal to see him work. People like to say he’s dumb but sometimes I highly doubt that. Creatively, that man is a genius. I’m completely serious. I will admit, we’ve always taken on a more folk, indie rock aesthetic. It feels so long ago now since we’ve done something like that. We’ve strayed so far from original sound that it’s kinda funny to think about. Is it bad to cringe at your own music? Nah, nah, nah. I’m kidding. We might try to go back to it at some point. We still like that kind of music but I’m not sure how we can implement it with the way were are now. Might have to figure that out at some point. As to what I’d say our sound is now, I’d say we have a… I don’t know? Like a, uhh… we’re still pretty indie but I guess more electronica, maybe? Hyperpop? [laughs awkwardly] I don’t know! We’ve evolved so far beyond from what we used to produce that I don’t even know what genre we would fall into anymore. [laughs]

(Cynthia and 2D at Studio 13 in London) I: [laughs] Well, before you worry too much about that. Tell us what it’s like working in a roomful of men. Does it ever get chaotic?

C: Well, yeah it gets chaotic but we’re all a little chaotic in together so, to me, it all evens out. I mean, if you’re asking if I’m bothered by working with a bunch of guys then, no. We're all friends and nothing more. I know that for some people, seeing a female lead with all male bandmates can be a little... I dunno, "intimidating" for lack of a better word? I feel like women have always had this complicated relationship in the music industry when it comes to expressing themselves. There's always this air of tension whenever we try to talk about what we go through. Our identity, our struggles, femininity, sexuality; just whatever... We're constantly being scrutinized by the media whether we talk to little or too much about our thoughts. So when some see a woman with multiple guys, they just think that she's a mouthpiece for them. Not that she has her own life or is her own person that isn't solely defined by the men in her life and doesn't need protection from the world. I like to think we should be above that mindset now. That's why I don't necessarily see this as just "my band" even though I'm the lead. At the end of the day, it's all of our thoughts collectively. Whenever I write songs about myself and the shit that I went through, I make sure to sing it. No one else gets to talk about my experiences except for me, the guys just help bring those emotions to the surface. Sorry, didn't mean to make that a long rant, I just wanted to get that off my chest.

I: Oh, you're completely fine. Now, aside from that. When should we expect new music from the Rejects?

C: Something soon hopefully. We don’t have an official release date but just expect something. This is going to be our first EP with our new members at the helm, so I’m really excited to see how our fans react.

I: I think we talked about some interesting stuff today but before we go, we do have one final question from a fan on Instagram.

C: Oh really? Sweet! Fire away.

I: From @katy.ward.8494, "What's your relationship like with Murdoc?"

C: Oh, uh… I don't talk to him anymore. I've cut contact with him a long time ago. I try not to talk about him but y’know… that reminds me of something. Murdoc, if you just so happen to be reading this, I just want you to know. I’m not going anywhere so suck on my nads you sick fu—

I: And that’s it for our interview with Ms. Cynthia from The Rejects! Tune in next time for our interview with producer and keyboardist, Stuart “2D” Pot where we’ll talk about his journey from Gorillaz to now.

It’s official. 

gOriLLaz iS sToRmIn AReA 51. 

👉👽👉 *finger guns* Y’all know what that means?? 👀 

Here’s the final product of my Gorillaz magazine project! Thank you to the person who asked the 11th question! (Mainly because you were the only person you asked and rest of the questions I had to write myself) Also, I’m sorry I don’t have your name up because I couldn’t seem to find your account. Sadly, however, something went wrong with the png file so I wasn’t able to show a clearer digital image of the entire thing so that’s why the quality is so shitty here. I hope you enjoy it! 😊👍

I can’t believe how much I’ve improved this year! 

Hopefully 2019 will be a better year. 

1. their home IS america, they live in detroit 2. that image is from 2013, after gorillaz split up in doyathing

Oh, okay. Well thank you! Although, I could’ve sworn in the Book of Murdoc (or maybe Book of Noodle too?? Idk) lived in West London and that’s when Gorillaz got back together and then THAT was their new HQ. Also I’m sorry I got the date wrong, totally my fault on that one. But to be quite honest, I’ve only been in the Gorillaz fandom since Humanz so do bare with me if I get things wrong. 😅

Hey, here’s a neat thought.

What if in the new Gorillaz TV show (or comic book, either one is fine), 2D is fed up with Murdoc’s “tranzformation” B.S— believing his new mood is really fishy, because he’s not used to such kind behavior from him. (Not to mention Mudz has tricked him before.) So in response, he leaves home to America. 

I mean it would explain this photo from Jamie’s Instagram in 2017. 

I also think someone on there asked him where 2D was going and Hewlett did answer saying “He’s leaving home.” But I looked through it and I think he deleted the response or— for all I know— it was fake and he didn’t actually say that. 🤔 

But THEN I got to thinking about that poster of The Rejects. Y’know, the one with Cyborg Noodle and that big Frankenstein looking guy? What if, in spite of Murdoc, 2D wanted to get them off the ground. I mean, just by the poster at Demon Dayz ALONE, it doesn’t look like they’re doing so good with getting gigs. 

And hell. Since Jamie did say in the interview at Demon Dayz that he’d want to use Ace again in the future, so who’s to say we won’t see Ace either? I dunno. I think it’d be pretty cool.

I just really, really hope that Murdoc keeps his promise and he treats 2D a little bit better. (Also I hope they keep Madge) 

I just realized Tumblr didn’t upload this picture in one of my other posts so here it is.

oh babey Ace beating Murdoc's ass over Stu is what I live for, thank you for this gift.

👌

Kind of an epilogue of the final day of @acestu‘s 2dace week. 

Onstage (https://bepis-boii.tumblr.com/post/179270743974/love-and-appreciation-for-aces-comeback-and-2ds)

I tried making somewhat of a story throughout this week. During phase four, Murdoc and 2D made a promise with each other in order to keep the band together and slowly began to create a bond between the two of them. When their relationship was at its peak, Murdoc was arrested and taken to jail. 2D was understandably furious, believing Murdoc wasn’t being a hundred percent faithful to him. So no matter how many times Murdoc begged him saying that he was in fact innocent, 2D turned him away. 

Fast forward to phase five, the band stumbles upon Ace. 2D is instantly enamored by him. After talking with him a bit, 2D realizes he had met Ace before at a club in 2007 when he was in law school. As their relationship progresses, 2D starts to use Ace as way to get back at Murdoc for being unfaithful. Now he absolutely loves Ace with all of his heart. He truly felt that Ace was the best thing for him. He felt that truly respected him. Thus an affair soon started between 2D and the band’s newest bass player, Ace. They both kept their relationship a secret to the public and as well as Murdoc. They feared that if Murdoc found out, he kick him or even call CN to get him fired. But of course, that’s exactly what happened. So when Ace comes back for the Demon Dayz Festival, he has a little “chat” with Murdoc. They soon come to an agreement that Ace will become a permanent member of the band as a backup vocalist. Thus 2D and Ace continue with their relationship. Murdoc however will now constantly blame himself for what happened between 2D and him. 

Don't worry, I’ll call you everyday. 

Goodbyes 

For @acestu‘s 2dace week

Bonus: 

“How could you?” 

Secrets 

For @acestu‘s 2Dace Week

I made murdoc but I forgot to do a lot of shading

I dont even remember the last time i posted here lmaooo have some gay bois

NOOOOOOOOOO

They are ready to bite someone.

❗EYE STRAIN❗

Don't do drugs, kids.

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She's probably scrolling through meme pages. :)

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