Fatarthoe666-blog - Alone Fat Art Hoe

summer mood

What about love?

When I was 12 years old I was just flirting with one boy at facebook.we were talking with videochats cause the distance between us was soo far.

When I was 13 years old I meet my first love(I still love him) my first crush, my first boyfriend, we were crazy in love with each other, he was hugging me and playing with my hair secretly, cause if anyone will see us together they would tell my parents. He knew I had very bad life, he was trying to make me feel happy.suddenly everything changes, he dont even looking at me, than I saw a girl at his friends, they had thousand of pictures together, they were comenting love words at each others pictures, I was fucking jealous of this skinny slut! Everyday seeing my ex with a slut is killing me inside out, I love him,it hurst but i know i will love him forever, I had whole life imagined with him, after second day we saw each other he just shouted front of school I love ..... (my name) my nickname is Amy but my real name is a secret. Well I am just dying, because of him I had insomnia, I diagnosed at 2017.

After 3 days of binge eating i just stand front of the mirror naked...

What I see? Fat,fat,fat,fat,fat,fat,fat!

When I wanted thigh gap,colar bones, flat stomack,hip bones,rib bones I keep eating like a piece of shit!

I need to control myself, when I see food I just can't stop eating, it is soo difficult but I need it! I need to lose weigh, I need to be skinny, I will die, I will die like this, I can't wear skirts,shorts,dresses,bikini. When I am going to family vacation I just sit at the sand and covering myself,staring at beautiful skinny girls, when I am at shpping in dressing room I am just sitting and crying, cause I can't fit in my favorite things😭

I will starve for whole june! I will starve soo hard, I will work soo hard!

Till my thighs don't touch!

Till i see my colar bones!

Till i have slim face

Slim hands

Skinny legs

Flat stomach

I can see my rib bones without sucking my stomach...

I would rather:

be cold than sweaty.

bruise easily than have red blotches on my skin.

be criticized for eating too little, not too much.

be dainty not chubby.

have clothes that are too big, not too small.

i want to be the opposite of what I am right now.

i don’t want to be me

source

Everyone who reblogs this, the magic fairy will help you to stop binging and will help you to reach your goal✨

All you gotta do is listen to her and reblog💫

Lool when I ate 18-20 kcal something I feel like I will die

100 calories is weird tbh

like, If I eat 100 calories its like ‘OMG THATS TOO MUCH YOU FAT FAILURE’

but if I burn off 100 calories its like ‘OMG THATS NOTHING YOU FAT FAILURE’ 

you feel me?

Text me 💫

if someone is feeling upset, depressed or suicidal, can they talk to you? if yes, please reblog this so they know they can message you.