Chaeryeong - Blog Posts

Jumping on a hype train, Shin Ryujin as Wednesday Addams

#SunshineCHAERYEONGDay

𝖕𝖗𝖎𝖓𝖈𝖊𝖘𝖘’𝖘 𝖊𝖘𝖈𝖆𝖕𝖊

 synopsis: ___ was trapped in an arranged marriage with Choi San, the crowned prince of wonderland and her step-sister’s lover. How will she find happiness? How will she escape?

pairing: thief!yunho x fem!reader

themes: royal au, angst, attempted suicide, physical abuse, a lot of blood, let me know if I missed anything

wc: 660 words

warning: this is in no way representing anyone’s personality. This is simply a work of fiction. 

a/n: this chapter is not proofread yet, apologies for any grammar or spelling errors😭😭.  ENJOY!!  (not proof read yet)

𝖈𝖍𝖆𝖕𝖙𝖊𝖗 𝖘𝖊𝖛𝖊𝖓

The royal family were gathered in the main hall along with all the maids, Sana and Harin.

"We're gathered here today to discuss an issue that has recently been brought to my attention." San's father announced.

"San. It has been brought to my attention that you have been committing infidelity and abusing ____ and that she had almost lost her life." He continued.

‘Why isn’t Mr Lee here?’ Jongho thought. 

San remained calm and replied, “I’m sorry father but where did you hear this from?”

“That’s beside the point. Did you or did you not hurt ____.” His father emphasised. 

San stood there in silence refusing to answer. Then Jongho voiced out, “Shouldn’t Mr Lee be here? It IS regarding his daughter.”

Just then an adviser came in and whispered something into his father’s ear. 

“Whatever is going on with you, San, don’t make it too obvious. You’re king now. Stay OUT of trouble.” He sternly said before leaving. 

After he left San immediately shouted for no one to leave and the person who told his father to come out. Not wanting anyone to get in trouble, the pale and just recovered ____ took the blame. 

San immediately gripped her hand tightly, and dragged her out of the main hall. His grip was so harsh that it would most likely leave a mark. As ____ was being dragged across the hall, San could see the worried look on Jongho’s face and realised that he had something to do with it.

“Stay out of my business my dear younger brother. You may be stronger, but I’m king. I have the political power. So watch your back.” San whispered to Jongho, as he walked past him, before leaving with Harin following behind, smirking at Jongho, as if she had already won.

Jongho scoffed. 

“Fuck father. I’ll settle this on my own.” Jongho mumbled to himself before leaving and slamming the door. 

Over the next few weeks, the abuse got worse. ____ could barely walk and it was more difficult for her to eat, talk or do anything, she wouldn’t even leave her bed. San was pissed that word got out and ‘punished’ ____ more for telling his father.

One day, she called all the maids into her room. She cried and broke down in front of them, begging them to tell no one. 

“I know you know what’s going on. I know you gossip about all of this. But please, I’m begging, make sure his highness doesn’t hear of this.”

Seeing the current queen of Wonderland in this state, all the maids felt bad for her. They saw, first hand, the results of the current king’s affair. Over those few weeks, they showed her more kindness. They tried their best to help her in any way,  whenever they could. They felt bad for her, having to go through all this and still being able to put on a smile for the citizens,who were unaware. They were thankful that she took the blame as they knew their families and their lives would be at risk if San himself found out it was actually them that leaked the information about the abuse to his father. 

All the maids showed her sympathy and were friendly. They were no longer cold and avoiding. They would always entertain her, whether it be the latest gossip in Wonderland or the neighbouring kingdoms or current affairs going on in their own kingdom. 

However, back at home, Chaeryeong started getting suspicious. Her sister hadn’t sent her a letter in a long time and she was worried. She was aware that San did not love her sister and loved Harin instead. She knew her sister wasn’t actually happy about the marriage but she would at least send her letter once every 2-4 days. However, it had been weeks since the last letter and Chaeryeong was starting to worry. 

What if she got hurt?

Well, that isn’t far from the truth..

Trios don’t last

a yunho angst fanfic

angst (cause i’m feeling sad)

fem!reader with bestfriend!Yunho

potentially reader x seonghwa

second option trope.

a/n: this is not proofread so im sorry for any grammar or spelling errors.

wc: 1104 words.

____ and Yunho were best friends. They had known each other since they were kids. They were neighbours and their moms were close friends.

Yunho and ____ were in the same high school. She had a crush on Yunho since middle school. She was thought he liked her back and wanted to confess at their graduation, she had planned this years ago and fantasied about how it would go. She thought everything would go perfectly.

That was until she transferred…

→~~~~~~~~~~~←

“Class. Quiet down. We have a new student joining our class today.” Mrs Lee announced.

Murmurs were heard throughout the class.

A new student? At this time of year? It’s the middle of the graduating year, who would transfer at a time like this?

Yunho leaned to ____ side and whispered, “I heard she’s pretty.”

____ rolled her eyes. She tried to not let it bother her as she has a huge crush on him since forever.

As the new student walked in everyone’s jaw dropped.

“Hi, I’m Jangmi. Lee Jangmi. Nice to meet you.”

She was gorgeous. Her looks were as if it had been hand crafted by Aphrodite herself. Her facial features were perfect. Her body was a perfect hourglass figure. Her skin was amazing.

Yunho’s eyes widened. “Damn, she really is fucking pretty, and shy. She’s literally my ideal type. ” he whispered to ____, while starring at Jangmi as if she was a piece of art at the museum.

____’s heart dropped. She felt like crying.

He never looked at me like that.

“Jangmi, you can sit in front of ____. ____ raise your hand please.”

And for the rest of the class, ____ just wanted to run and cry.

→~~~~~ during break ~~~~~←

“Hi Jangmi, I’m Yunho. Do you want us to show you around school?” Yunho went up to Jangmi, dragging ____ with him.

____ faked a smile and nodded her head.

Jangmi agreed and for the rest of their break both of them showed her around the school.

“Lastly, this is the cafeteria. Do you want to eat?” Yunho asked.

“No thank you. I’m on a diet.” Jangmi rejected with a smile as she waved her hand.

“Diet? But you’re so skinny. Maybe ____ should go on a diet.” He nudged ____ teasingly and laughed.

Jangmi giggled. ____ looked down, feeling upset. She wanted to run away.

Am I really fat?

“I’m not that skinny and ____ is nice just the way she is. I think she’s really pretty.” Jangmi said.

____ looked up.

She’s nice.

→~~~~~~~~~~~←

Every since then, they’ve been a group. The three of them.

→~~~~~~~~~~~←

“Hey ____, did you hear about Yunho?” Yeosang asked.

Yeosang and ____ were also very close. But he didn’t really click well with Yunho. Both ____ and Yeosang shared multiple classes, in those classes, Yunho would share them with Jangmi and every time after those lessons, Yunho would hang out with Jangmi and accidentally ignore ____.

“Huh? What?”

“Are you sure you don’t know? You two are always so close.”

“We drifted a little. He’s really close with Jangmi nowadays.”

Yeosang was aware that ____ liked Yunho. He never understood why but never questioned his friend’s taste.

“I don’t think it’s a good idea to tell you then.”

“Just say it.” ____ was getting annoyed.

“He likes Jangmi. I over heard him talking to Mingi about confessing to her on graduation day.”

____’s heart fell. She had heard some rumors about Yunho confessing on graduation day and she thought it was her as all her other friends were also convinced it was her.

____’s face turned pale.

“You ok?” Yeosang asked, concerned.

____ nodded without saying anything. She didn’t feel like talking.

→~~~~~ after class ~~~~~←

When ____ was leaving the class with Yeosang, Yunho suddenly pulled her away.

“Hey, I know we hadn’t hung out in a while but I need to ask you something.”

“Ask Jangmi.” ____ coldly said before turning and leaving.

Yunho ran up to her and walked beside her.

“It IS about her. I can’t ask her.” He whispered.

As they left the school, Yunho dragged ____ to the nearby café, the one where they used to go to a lot before Jangmi came into their lives.

“Look, I like Jangmi and I was thinking that maybe you can help me.”

Hearing those three words, ____’s mind blanked out.

He likes her

Just as he finished his sentence, Yeosang entered with Wooyoung. Both guys saw ____ and Yeosang realised that she was uncomfortable.

As Yunho was waiting for a reply, Yeosang dragged Wooyoung and walked towards them.

“Hey ____, I’ve been looking all over for you.” Yeosang said.

“You have?” Wooyoung replied giving his best friend the ‘what the fuck’ look before getting elbowed by said friend.

“What do you need her for?” Yunho said rolling his eyes.

Do you really have to interrupt us?

Yunho was annoyed.

“The group project. We need to start on it. The three of us.” Yeosang said.

It was the best excuse he could come up with to get his friend out of the uncomfortable situation.

“Since when do we have a group project?” Wooyoung asked again.

“Yea since when?” ____ asked.

“Both of you really need to pay attention in class.” Yeosang said as he begun packing for ____ and dragging her out.

Yunho was left there, annoyed.

“What group project?” Wooyoung asked again.

“Stop asking. There is no group project. I was trying to get our friend her out of that situation.” Yeosang replied glaring at Wooyoung.

He turned his head to ____ and asked “What did he ask? Are you ok? You looked uncomfortable. That was the only excuse I could come up with.”

“Can I go home? I’ll tell you there. Please. He can see us. I just want to go home.”

Just as they were walking, they saw Jangmi.

“Oh, ____. Hiiiii.” She ran up to her and hugged her.

“Oh my god. Are you ok? You look so pale.” She asked, her voice full of concern.

____ nodded and smiled.

“Are these your friends? Hiii, I’m Jangmi.” Jangmi offered her hand but neither Yoesang not Wooyoung took it. Yeosang just grabbed Wooyoung and ____’s hand and dragged them towards the direction of ____’s house.

Jangmi was left there, confused.

→~~~~~ at her home ~~~~~←

____ explained everything to the two friends.

“He said he liked her.” ____ said hysterically into Yeosang’s shoulder.

Wooyoung was pissed. He knew about her crush. He also thought that Yunho was interested in her seeing how much he always cared for her.

“But I can’t bring myself to hate her. She’s so nice.”

“Let’s beat him up.” Wooyoung whispered to Yeosang.

Yeosang glared at him then looked back at the crying ____ on his shoulder.

After a few hours of crying, “I think it’s best to tell him how you feel. Get over him quicker.” Wooyoung suddenly suggested.

“That’s not go-“

“yeah i agree” ____ suddenly voiced out.

“I need to get over this. I’ve liked him for so long but he never noticed.”

“But your friendship…” Yeosang said softly.

“It’s ok. We’ve drifted anyways. He doesn’t hand out with me anymore. It’s like im invisible whenever the three of us hang out. There’s no use keeping this friendship going It was over ever since Jangmi joined. It’s better to accept reality now than later.” ____ said as she wiped her tears.

→~~~~~ the next day ~~~~~←

“Hey, ____ can I talk to you?” Jangmi asked, as she pulled ____ out.

“Hey! What about me?” Yunho pouted.

“It’s a girls thing.” Jangmi replied, sticking out her tongue playfully before leaving.

“What did you need to talk about?”

“I like Yunho”

“I was thinking, since you’ve been friends with him for so long. Maybe you can help me think of how to confess…” The last part was said softly.

____’s world stopped. She had told herself that she had to get over him quickly but hearing her say that made her heart ache even more.

“I don’t know. Ask Mingi.” ____ replied, trying to hold back her tears.

“I thought that yo-“

“____! I found you. I’m gonna borrow her for a sec. You can go to class first.” Wooyoung suddenly interrupted, pulling ____ away.

A confused Jangmi stared at them before shrugging her shoulders and walking back into class.

Wooyoung was going to his own class but saw both girls talking, and after Jangmi had finished talking he saw a visible shift in ____ facial expressions and knew he had to get her out of that situation.

“You good?”

“She likes him back.” ____ suddenly said.

“What?” Wooyoung asked, confused.

“Jangmi likes Yunho.”

As they talked outside her class, both of them looked into the class. Seeing how lovingly they both stared at each other ____ felt jealous.

“It’s always her. I’ve lost count the number if times guys have come to ask me on how to ask her out. She’s so god damn perfect that it is so fucking difficult to hate her.” ____ finally let out her rage.

Wooyoung didn’t know what to do. He had never seen ____ that angry. She was always composed, but because of this, she finally broke.

Wooyoung as about to say something, but the bell rang before he could say a word.

____ took a deep breath and pat Wooyoung’s shoulder.

“I’m fine. Wait for me here. It’s math. I’ll take my bag and we cam go to class together.”

Math was one of the lesson that ____ shared with Wooyoung and Yeosang while Yunho shared it with Jangmi.

→~~~~~ after math (🤮) lesson ~~~~~←

____ left the class on her own to talk to Yunho.

“Hey Yunho, are you free now. I need to talk to you.”

“Oh, hey ____. I’m kind of busy now. Mimi and I are going to the bookstore to pick up something.”

“Mimi?”

“Yeah, Jangmi.”

“You’re on nickname basis now?” ____ whispered as Yunho grabbed Jangmi’s hand and left.

Since then, Yunho and ____ barely talked. Whenever she tried to talk to him, Jangmi would be there or he would be too busy, having plans with Jangmi.

→~~~~~ on graduation day ~~~~~←

Today was the day But it was not as happy or as bright as ____ had imagined.

She woke up late, didn’t have time to eat her breakfast and as she was running to school, she had gotten water splashed on her by a car. So far her day wasn’t going good.

This was her last day of school. She was going to tell Yunho how she felt before leaving.

→~~~~~ the night before ~~~~~←

“Mom, Dad. I want to go to Australia to study.”

Her parents were shocked at her sudden request.

“But why?” Her mom asked.

“I just want to further my education there. It’s better. And Yeosang and Wooyoung are so going. We applied to the same course.”

“But sweetie what about Yunho?” Her mom suddenly asked.

“My education and future is more important than a friend. Can I please go?“

Seeing how determined their daughter was, they gave in.

→~~~~~ back to present ~~~~~←

The whole day, ____ couldn’t find Yunho.

At the ceremony, she saw Yunho at the stage wing and wonder what he was doing there. He wasn’t the smartest and never scored high marks. He was a mediocre student.

Everyone’s parents were there to see their child graduate. Even ____, Jangmi and Yunho’s parents were there.

Yunho stepped up on stage. He took the mic and walked towards were Jangmi was sitting. He then got on one knee and pulled out a bouquet of red roses, Jangmi and ____’s favourite flowers.

“Lee Jangmi. Would you make me the happiest man in this hall and be my girlfriend?” Yunho confessed in front of everyone.

Jangmi was in shock while all of ____’s friends turned to look at ____, even Yeosang and Wopyoung. They felt bad. ____ was holding in her tears. She knew she had to get over this, but it hurt. It really hurt. It just hurts so bad.

“Oh my god, Yunho… Yes!” Jangmi said as she hugged him.

Hearing Jangmi’s reply, ____’s mom knew why her daughter wanted to leave so bad, and she understood. She could see how much pain her daughter was in and put her arm around her shoulder.

“It’s ok. Let’s go home.” She whispered.

Seeing ____ and her family leaving Yeosang also decided to leave.

While everyone cheered, the two families left quietly.

At the carpark, Yeosang ran up to ____’s family.

“Mr Kim. Mrs Kim. Can I talk to ____?”

Both parents nodded and Yeosang ____ left to one side as both their parents waited in the car.

“Are you ok?”

Just then Wooyoung and the rest of her friends ran out.

“____ are you ok?” all of them asked at the same time.

Seeing all her friends caring so much about her, she started crying.

“I’m sorry. I so sorry.” Tears ran down her cheeks as she tried to hide her face.

Seeing this, everyone hugged her.

“Don’t apologise. You did nothing wrong. You’ll meet someone better in the future.” Chaeryeong, one of her best friend, said.

“Yeah, you’ll meet someone a million times hotter and richer.” Xiaoting said and everyone burst out laughing.

“We’ll miss you a lot ____.” Hikaru said, trying not to cry.

All her friends we’re aware about ____’s decision to go overseas. They were also aware of the reason. They understood her decision.

→~~~~~ the next morning ~~~~~←

They were all at the airport. Yeosang, Wooyoung and ____ all had their luggages. ____ was saying her last goodbyes to her friends and family.

“I’ll come back every holiday.” ____ said crying.

All of them were crying. ____’s parents were happy to see how much their daughter had grown and her friends all were sad to have to see her leave for the sake of a boy.

“Hey… They’re calling our flight already. It’s time to go.” Yeosang softly said.

Hugging everyone and saying their goodbyes, the three of them left to their boarding gate. ____ was assured that this trio would surely last.

As she was turning her phone to flight mode, she received a text.

‘Hey ____ where were you? Let’s celebrate.’

It was from Yunho.

Then another text came in.

‘____-ieeeeee. Let’s celebratee. I misss youu alreadyyy😭😭😭’

It was from Jangmin.

____ decided that her story with them ends here. She ignored their messages.

“I can’t wait to see San again. I miss him so mucchhhhh.” Wooyoung whined.

“I’m curious to see your boyfriend.” ____ teased.

“What about you? Who’s this Jongho guy?” She teased Yeosang.

Yeosang blushed and elbowed ____.

→~~~~~ Australia airport ~~~~~←

“BABEEEE!!” Wooyoung shouted as he ran towards someone.

“God this child.” Yeosang whispered, rolling his eyes.

“What about you? That San guy has someone beside him.”

Yeosang looked towards San’s direction and saw his own boyfriend and blushed again.

“God you’re so shy. Go.” ____ gave him a push.

Jongho walked up to him and kissed him.

“Hi baby.”

Yeosang blushed again, “shut up, ____’s here.”

Beside the couple, ____ started giggling.

It was cute how the two best friends dated a pair of brothers. The Choi brothers grew up in Korea and San was close with Yeosang and Wooyoung. Eventually, San and Wooyoung started dating. Then they met Jongho, and Yeosang fell in love too. Then they started dating. But the Choi brothers had to move, so they had a long distance relationship. Then in their last year of middle school, they met ____ and Yunho.

“Hello, I’m Kim ____.”

“Hello.” The brothers said in unison.

The two couples then resumed their lovey dovey acts making ____ feel lonely.

“God I hate third wheeling.”

“You’ll get used to it.” Wooyoung teased.

____ rolled her eyes at his reply.

“How did you come here?” Yeosang asked, with Jongho still hugging him, he refused to let him go.

“Seonghwa hyung drove us here. He’s there.” San pointed to a man walking towards them.

____’s jaw dropped.

Oh fuck he’s hot

“Hello, I’m Seonghwa.”

“Let’s put your things at home before going out.” He suggested.

Seonghwa bought a house and the Choi brothers lived with him. Paying monthly rent of course. Seeing that their boyfriends were moving, they suggested to Seonghwa to allow them to stay and he agreed.

When they reached the house, the three of them were shocked. They house was big.

“Damn. He rich rich.” Wopyoung whispered to ____ and Yeosang.

They were assigned different rooms. The couples together and ____ alone.

When Seonghwa was showing ____ her room, they were alone. Seonghwa found ____ pretty. He couldn’t take his eyes off her. He had heard about what happened to her and couldn’t understand how anyone could treat her like that.

“Uhm… Can I help you?” ____ asked.

“You’re really pretty.” Seonghwa blurted out.

____ blushed at his words.

Realising that, Seonghwa panicked. He just met her and was already trying to hit in her.

God. Fucking idiot. I just had to fuck it up

“Uhhh. I didn’t mean to say it. But I-I mean yeah you’re really pretty and uh”

“Thanks. You’re really good looking too.” ____ interrupted.

They just stood there. Both with a very obvious shade of red on their cheeks.

Wooyoung and San were outside and Wooyoung had an idea. With a cheeky smile, he pushed ____ towards Seonghwa’s direction. Seonghwa caught her to prevent her from falling and the close proximity between the two made them blush even more. The couple giggled at the two of them.

“Uhm… I’m so sorry.” ____ quickly said, getting off of him.

“It’s ok.”

Just then ____ got a call.

“Hey mom.”

“Sweetie. Yunho and his girlfriend came over to ask for you. I told them you were out.”

“Thanks mom.”

After the graduation ceremony, ____ didn’t feel like talking to Yunho anymore. She felt it was better to leave things that way.

Then ____ got another call. Seeing the caller ID being Yunho, ____ panicked.

“If you don’t mind?” Seonghwa asked, sticking out his hand, offering to pick up for her.

____ handed Seonghwa her phone.

“Hello? ____. Where are you? You left me on read. Jangmi’s here, we’re at the café. Come join us.”

“____, please comeee.” Jangmi added.

“She’s not available right now.”

“Wh-who are you?”

“That’s not important.” Seonghwa replied as he patted ____’s head.

“God this is so slow.” Wooyoung whsipered.

“You were also like this. Don’t forget that.” Yeosang whispered back.

The two couples were in the same room, waiting for them.

“Where is she?” Yunho asked.

“Do you want him to never call again?” Seonghwa asked ____ while covering the phone mic.

____ nodded looking at the floor. She felt like crying again.

Seeing this, Seonghwa replied “She’s currently beside me. Would you like to speak to your friend babe?” Before hanging up the call.

Seeing what Seonghwa did, ____ blushed even harder if that was possible. He then put her phone on the bed and hugged her.

“It’s ok. Let’s go and eat.” Seonghwa bent down to her eyes level.

Feeling her heart racing, she grew confident and kissed him on the cheek before taking her phone and running to Yeosang’s side.

San, Wooyoung, Yeosang and ____ left while Seonghwa and Jongho were left there.

“Hyung, I think you better hurry and take her before she takes my boyfriend away.” Jongho said, patting Seonghwa’s shoulder before leaving.

“He’s never this confident. Whatever he did to that Yunho guy was for you.” San said to ____.

Wooyoung smirked, “ooooo. Little ____ and Seonghwaa. How cute..”

The two couples knew that they would be a cute couple, it was just a matter of time.

Yunho was left confused. What happened to his best friend? He would never know how ____ felt and he would never understand why her friends started treating him coldly. He would never know why ____ cut contact with him. While in Australia, a new love was blooming for her. A chance to feel the love that Yunho could never reciprocate.

A trio that never lasted. A best friend that left. An unrequited love that ended with no closure. A friendship that was never meant to be. A boy that was blind to his best friend’s love to him and a girl that was always the second option.

a/n: I used Woosan and Jongsang because its cute😭😭😭

hope you liked it🤩🤩 i decided to give ____ a happy ending with mama hwa.

𝖕𝖗𝖎𝖓𝖈𝖊𝖘𝖘’𝖘 𝖊𝖘𝖈𝖆𝖕𝖊

synopsis: ___ was trapped in an arranged marriage with Choi San, the crowned prince of wonderland and her step-sister’s lover. How will she find happiness? How will she escape?

pairing: thief!yunho x fem!reader

themes: royal au, angst, missing family, threats, let me know if I missed anything

wc: 317 words

warning: this is in no way representing anyone’s personality. This is simply a work of fiction. 

a/n: this chapter is not proofread yet, apologies for any grammar or spelling errors😭😭.  ENJOY!!

𝖈𝖍𝖆𝖕𝖙𝖊𝖗 3.5

Over the past 7 years, San and Harin would always meet up behind everyone’s back, thinking no one knew of their secret meetings. Harin would always go to the palace to visit San so as to not raise suspicion from her step-father, and the king and queen were too busy to care about how often Harin would visit. ___, however, was well aware of these secret meetings and the blossoming relationship between the 2. She would just always act oblivious just to trick herself to spare her heart. That was up till 3 years ago, when ____ was forced to move into the palace as she was already 16. This made her even more aware of the things going on in the relationship. The maids would always look at her, sometimes with pity, while other times they would sneer and snicke as they walked past her, gossiping about the relationship between their prince and her step-sister. For the past 3 years, ___ had not gone back home. She hardly ever saw her father, Chaeryeong or Xiaoting. She wasn’t allowed to leave the palace without San. However, over those years, she made a new friend and they grew to be very close. Ezaki Hikaru, her personal maid. Hikaru was much younger than ____. She came from a neighbouring country and her family suffered financially hence she started working in the palace to earn money to support her family. ___ and Hikaru got really close with Jongho as well. Whenever ___  had free time, she would invite Hikaru and Jongho to the library to chat and catch up. Jongho was the only person in touch with ___’s family and always updated her on any news from her family and friends. Like when Chaeryeong had fallen down a flight of stairs while chasing a butterfly but had recovered, or just how much her father, Chaeryeong and Xiaoting were missing her.

masterlist

𝖕𝖗𝖎𝖓𝖈𝖊𝖘𝖘’𝖘 𝖊𝖘𝖈𝖆𝖕𝖊

synopsis: ___ was trapped in an arranged marriage with Choi San, the crowned prince of wonderland and her step-sister’s lover. How will she find happiness? How will she escape?

pairing: thief!yunho x fem!reader

themes: abuse, infidelity, reader is very good at hiding her emotions :)

wc: 517 words

warning: this is in no way representing anyone’s personalities. This is simply a work of fiction. !!There will be mentions of abuse and infidelity in this chapter, I do not support any of these!!

a/n: this chapter is not proofread yet, apologies for any grammar or spelling errors😭😭.  ENJOY!!

𝕮𝖍𝖆𝖕𝖙𝖊𝖗 𝖙𝖍𝖗𝖊𝖊

Author pov

7 years later, ____ is 20, San is 21

At the palace

“Let’s all congratulate the newly wedded couple and the reign of a new king!” The previous king announced.

There, in front of the whole country, stood ____ and San, the new king and queen of wonderland, seemingly happily married.

Walking back in, ____ saw Xiaoting and Chaeryeong together. She wanted to talk to them and finally catch up after so long when San held her arm tightly. 

“Remember, don’t speak a word about last night.” He threatened, then let her arm and walked out of the dining hall, most likely to see Harin again.

-------------------

Last night

“WHY MUST I GET MARRIED TO YOU?!?” San yelled, throwing random things towards ___’s direction.

____ was on the floor, in her nightgown, body bruised and bleeding from San’s abuse. 

Just then, Harin walked in. 

“Sannie, what’s going on?” 

San looked up to her and went to hug and kiss her. 

“Nothing much love, just dealing with some stuff.” San said as he looked at ____ with disgust.

Harin went up to her and kicked her. “Why didn’t you invite me to play?” she asked in her sickening high-toned fake voice.

This went on for the next few hours. They kept beating her and pulling her hair, torturing and abusing her. 

She never wanted this. She wanted to leave the marriage, however leaving the marriage will result in her family being exiled from the kingdom and her father possibly executed.

End of flashback

-----------------------------

____ walked towards Xiaoting and Chaeryeong. 

“There my little baby is. Oh, I can’t believe you’re getting married. My little baby grows up so fast.” Xiaoting says as she wipes off a fake tear.

“Oh stop being so dramatic,” Chaeryeong said, lightly hitting Xiaoting’s shoulder.

“Anyway, how are you? I haven’t seen you in so long. Is he treating you right/ Is he still seeing that bitch? Speaking of him, where is he? What kind of man leaves their wife right after their marriage ceremony? Chaeryeong bombarded _____ with questions

“Yes, he’s treating me well. No, he hasn’t been seeing Harin and lastly I have no idea where he is.” ____ lied with a smile.

Both girls seem to believe it, seeing that their faces showed the look of joy towards their youngest friend having married prince Choi and becoming queen.

Did ____ feel bad lying to the 2 people she trusts the most? Yes, absolutely. But it was the only way ____ could think of to keep them out of her problem, to keep them unaware. If they knew, ____ was afraid of what San might do to them.

The 3 of them continued their conversation, it was more like Chaeryeong and Xiaoting were the ones talking. ____ stood there in silence just listening to them, she managed to hide her feelings well since her smile looked so genuine. After all, she had managed to keep that facade for more than 5 years. However, she kept silent as she felt that if she were to open her mouth, she might break down crying. 

masterlist

𝖕𝖗𝖎𝖓𝖈𝖊𝖘𝖘’𝖘 𝖊𝖘𝖈𝖆𝖕𝖊

synopsis: ___ was trapped in an arranged marriage with Choi San, the crowned prince of wonderland and her step-sister’s lover. How will she find happiness? How will she escape?

pairing: thief!yunho x fem!reader

themes: angst

wc: 679 words

warning: this is in no way representing anyone’s personalities. This is simply a work of fiction. 

a/n: this is not proofread yet so I’m sorry for any grammar or spelling mistakes 😭😭 . ENJOY!!

𝕮𝖍𝖆𝖕𝖙𝖊𝖗 𝖙𝖜𝖔

_____’s pov

After dinner, San and Harin left by themselves to god knows where and the adults were still chatting.

“Hey, where did San go?” a voice beside me asked.

I turned to look at the person, “I saw him leaving with Harin.” I replied.

Jongho gave me a confused look. “ok…”

“Let’s just walk around! I’m bored.” Chaeryeong whined.

We took our leave and started wandering around the palace, then Jongho suggested the Gazebo.

“It’s pretty chilly so it’s actually very relaxing. I go there a lot to take a breather, you know, being a prince is kinda stressful” Jongho explained.

Chaeryeong nodded in agreement, “seems like it. Your eyebags are horribly obvious.”

Upon reaching the Gazebo, Chaeryeong suddenly voiced out, “hey, ____, did you realise anything weird about San just now? He kept only looking at that bitch.” 

“Yeah, I noticed that too. What’s up with that?” Jongho added on.

It’s probably nothing. Maybe they’re just getting to know each other. Right?

I just shrugged my shoulders, acting confused. I didn’t want to jump to conclusions prematurely. But maybe, just maybe, my gut feeling was right.

After chatting for a while, the 3 of us got tired and decided to end the night there.

“Goodnight!” Jongho bowed.

We bowed back and headed towards our rooms. Jongho’s room was at the other side of the palace while mine and Chaeryeong’s rooms were side by side.

After cleaning up, I was still bothered by my thoughts. I couldn’t sleep, so I decided to take a walk around the palace to clear my mind a little. As I turned the corner, I saw San and Harin. I quickly hid behind a pillar. I was curious what was going on between them, after all they had just met today, isn’t this a little weird? Curiosity got the better of me and I decided to take a look at what was going on. 

What I saw broke my heart to pieces. I should’ve just left them alone, being oblivious is better than being heart broken after all. 

—-------

San took Harin’s hand and gave it a kiss. “I’ll see you soon milady.” 

Her face was tinted with a light shade of red. “Let me take you to your room,” he suggested.

Harin nodded, face still a burning shade of red, “thank you, your highness.”

“Please, just call me San”

As they headed towards Harin’s room, I quietly followed them. San gave Harin another quick kiss on the back of her hand again before wishing her goodnight again then leaving.

After following San for a while, I decided to pretend to accidentally bump into him.

“Hey San, what a coincidence seeing you out here, do you wanna go to the gazebo together, I can’t sleep.” I asked.

“Sorry ____, I’m tired. I’m gonna go to my room now. Take care. And please stop calling me San, it’s your highness. We aren’t that close anymore.” He said to me in a cold voice, showing me his emotionless eyes, before turning his back to me and heading to his room.

My heart clenched at his reaction, but I just smiled and bowed to him, before walking back to my room.

Did he really like Harin? Why could Harin call him San and not me? Why? Why her of all people?

I mentally slapped myself. 

It’s not nice to think of someone like that. ____, that’s mean.

I shook off all my thoughts and quickly just walked back to my room.

The next morning we had to go back.

At the front of the palace, Papa and Ms Goo were still talking to the king and queen, and Chaeryeong was still talking to Jongho. I looked over to San and he never even bat an eyelash towards my direction. The whole morning his eyes were glued on Harin and her eyes were also glued on him.

Perhaps this was when it all came falling down and my gut feeling was right.

I sigh before quietly picking up my things and walking to the carriage, letting my thoughts consume me.

masterlist

𝖕𝖗𝖎𝖓𝖈𝖊𝖘𝖘’𝖘 𝖊𝖘𝖈𝖆𝖕𝖊

 synopsis: ___ was trapped in an arranged marriage with Choi San, the crowned prince of wonderland and her step-sister’s lover. How will she find happiness? How will she escape?

pairing: thief!yunho x fem!reader

themes: royal au, angst, romance, kidnapping, horrible parents, bullying, abuse, cursing

wc: 522 words

warning: this is in no way representing anyone’s personalities. This is simply a work of fiction. ENJOY!!

a/n: hi, this is my first time writing these types of stories, so i’m sorry for any errors are things that don’t make sense. sorry for grammar or spelling mistakes. (not proofread yet)

𝖈𝖍𝖆𝖕𝖙𝖊𝖗 𝖔𝖓𝖊

______’s POV

“We’ll be having dinner with the royal family tonight _____, so wear that dress that you recently got.” Papa instructed.

“Why?” I whined.

“No questions young lady, you know why.” Papa said sternly before walking away.

After Papa left, I dragged my feet to the garden to tell Chaeryeong. The garden was our safe space. Mama used to always play with us here. I miss Mama...

“Chaeryeeeoooong” I whined.

She turned around and playfully glared at me for disturbing her peace.

“Did Papa tell you we’re going to have dinner with the royal family tonight?”

She nodded, “yeah, and the Goos are coming along. ugh! I can stand another moment in the same room as those 2 annoying ass fuckers.”

I gasped, “don’t say that,” I hit her shoulder.

After chatting for a while, we headed back into the castle to get ready.

“Hah, look who’s here,” a voice mocked.

I saw Chaeryeong roll her eyes.

 “Ugh I seriously can’t stand her. I just wanna slap her across her damn face.”

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

At the royal palace

“Good evening your highnesses” we greeted.

“Oh, you’re all here on time. Wonderful.” The Queen said cheerfully.

“Dinner has already been set up. Come. Follow me.”

“I can’t believe she’s marrying the prince mom, I want the prince”

“You’re prettier than her, do you see her dress? The prince will definitely change his mind.”

Hearing their conversation really made me doubt myself.

‘Was my dress really that ugly? Was the prince really change his mind?’

A million thoughts were running in my head. I love him, and he loves me. Right? He said he did.

Flashback to 3 years ago

10-year-old ____ and 11-year-old San were playing in the castle’s garden

“Hey, San.” I called out.

He turned to look at me.

“Do you really wanna spend your entire life with me in the future?” I asked innocently.

“Of course! I love you. Why wouldn’t I wanna sped my entire future with the person I love.” He said as he cupped my face.

We giggled and continued playing about till sunset.

He said those 3 words to me when I was 10. Was it maybe too soon?

End of flashback

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

As I walked into the dining hall, I saw San. I smiled at him, but he was staring at something else. He seems to be in awe as his facial expression showed pure shock. I followed his line of vision and saw he was looking at Harin. Is this real? 

We all took our seats, I sat between Chaeryeong and Papa. I glanced at San. He still hadn’t taken his eyes off Harin. He was staring and blushing.

Papa, Ms Goo, her highness and his highness were talking amongst themselves. Jongho and Chaeryeong were also talking amongst themselves. I looked at San again. He was whispering something in Harin’s ear and they giggled, Harin even blushing. They kept talking to each other. Their eyes never left each other. They looked so in love, and they only met for the first time.

With a heavy heart, I ate in silence.

The nightmare was just getting started.

masterlist

𝖕𝖗𝖎𝖓𝖈𝖊𝖘𝖘’𝖘 𝖊𝖘𝖈𝖆𝖕𝖊

synopsis: ___ was trapped in an arranged marriage with Choi San, the crowned prince of wonderland and her step-sister’s lover. How will she find happiness? How will she escape?

pairing: thief!yunho x fem!reader

themes: royal au, angst, romance, kidnapping, horrible parents, tba

wc: 231 words

warning: this is in no way representing anyone’s personalities. This is simply a work of fiction. ENJOY!!

   𝖕𝖗𝖔𝖑𝖔𝖌𝖚𝖊

Lee family’s backstory

The Lee family was a happy family. Mr Lee was the king’s advisor, the breadwinner of the family so to say. Despite his busy schedule, he always managed to find time to be a part of his children’s lives. He always made sure to be there for any and all events, their birthdays etc. Mrs Lee was a very caring mother who always took care of the kids. They were a very tight knit family. Mrs Lee was the best mother any child could ask for. They were a very happy family, until that fateful day.

Mrs Lee suddenly fainted. Doctors from all over the kingdom, even from neighboring kingdoms, could not find what was wrong. It was until that fateful day, a day after _____’s 3rd birthday that Mrs Lee finally passed.

Despite this, Mr Lee was still always present in his daughters’ lives. Chaeryeong was forced to grow up faster than she should to take care of her younger sister, ______. 

“Papa, when’s Mama coming back?” 

Hearing 3-year-old ____ say that broke his heart. He could not bare to tell her anything.

“Mama will be back soon...”

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A few years later, when _____ was 13, Mr Lee had remarried. He married Ms Goo and Ms Goo had a daughter. Goo Harin. To say their lives changed, was an understatement. Their lives became a living hell.

masterlist

Good Boy Gone Bad

Fandom: Enhypen

Member: Jakexoc

Genre: Angst

AU: nonidol!au

Trigger warning: Toxic relationships, heartbroken Jake, alcohol, cigarettes, mentions of drugs, use of curse words, verbal fights. Let me know If I should add anything!

Summary: Jake writes a diary in which he explains his first heartbreak from his first love.

Word count: 5.257

A/N: This is for @emeraldenha​ ‘s unlikely collab! Go check out the other works that have been submitted. This is my first collab ever and I know there’s room for improvement but thank you so much Ri for letting me participate <3

this is my first post after a very long mental health and work/college break, I was recently diagnosed with some conditions so I’ve been coping with that but hopefully my updating schedule get more consistent from now on!

Hi, my name is Jake Sim, I am currently twenty-two years old and today I’ll tell you about my first love at eighteen 

It all started that morning during math class, I had already seen her a million times before. Her beauty was something straight out of a fairy tale, even if some things didn’t exactly fit the “I just stepped into a magic closet and now I have to save the world” aesthetic. I had never heard or read of a princess that had prominent dark circles under her eyes adorned with clumps of mascara. I had never seen a princess that used vulgar language like her. I had never heard of a princess that reeked of cigarettes and cheap perfume, but I got used to it.

I got used to the curse words that she uttered in every single sentence. I got used to her friends being all over her. I got used to hearing her nightly adventures that took place almost everyday of the week. But I also got used to her giggles every time her best friend Jiung said anything. I got used to the way she smiles at the small doodles she scribbles on Sunghoon’s arm when he’s in the mood. I got used to hearing her talk to her friends about her struggles, she was human after all.

Maybe this all sounds cliché to you but it doesn’t to me, well, it didn’t. I really thought she was the one destined for me. I thought I could change her, she just needed a little guidance. I thought all of the rumors I heard about her were fake and were only made up by people that were jealous of her undeniable beauty, but I guess not. They were right.

“Sim! Eyes up!” My coach shouted at me onces I missed the ball for the fifth time in the game. It was just a practice game but apparently it was still too important for my coach. I should have remembered this phrase when I started falling for her, fuck, how could I?

“Hey, everything alright?” It was Riki, he’s a year below me but we get along well, he’s a good guy. 

“Huh? Oh yeah, all good. I’ve just been thinking about a Spanish assignment I have to finish, that's all.” At the time that was partly true, I had just barely started to realize that my more than normal fixation with that girl was not quite normal. 

“Ahh, well I’m sure you’ll do alright. There’s this girl in my class that’s a native Spanish speaker and we’re sort of close, I can ask her to help you if you’d like.” She’s a native Spanish speaker too.

“You know what? That would be great, you have my number if you have to reach out to me.” The coach blew his whistle to let us know that practice was over. “Thank you, man. I appreciate you.” And just like that, we parted ways to go home.

I should’ve told him I didn’t need the help, I could have avoided the trouble that came after but to be honest, as top of the class, class president, tutor and captain of the football team I was collapsing with so many duties and I have to admit, Spanish is not my forte. 

The next day Riki came up to me and told me that the girl he talked to me about was willing to help, he told me her name Lucía, and gave me her number saying that she wanted to talk to me, that I should reach out to her. And so I did, she replied shortly after and told me we should meet up after school in the café a couple blocks away. 

I had never heard of someone named Lucía at school so I was pretty nervous to meet her, I didn't really know what to expect. I spent the entire day thinking about my introduction and what I was gonna ask her when we met. I was so immersed in my own thoughts that I did not realize all the stares I was receiving, never noticed them to be honest.

“Man, why?”  My closest friend back then, Jay, asked me. He ripped right out of my thoughts.

“Huh?” I mumbled, utterly confused as to what he was talking about.

“What do you mean huh? Why did you do that?” He asked me again. I now had a feeling that I had fucked up in some way, shape or form. 

“Bro, I seriously have no idea what you’re talking about” I explain now urging him to tell me what was wrong.

“You really don’t know? Ok I’ll explain then. So basically you were walking down the halls when Victoria, you know her, called your name like fifty times and even put herself in front of you to get your attention and you just blatantly ignored her. You know what they say about her, you can’t really mess with her, man.” Jay explained and suddenly all the stares I got throughout the day made total sense. 

“Wait, Victoria? From our class?” I asked even though I already knew what Victoria he was talking about with the last comment he made. 

“The only Victoria from our class Jake, the one that looks like she doesn’t shower. I wouldn’t be surprised if she didn’t though, she smells like a fucking drug addict.” Jay ranted.

“Don’t say that dude, you don’t know her. Who knows? Maybe she’s in a bad situation, don’t just assume things like that without knowing that person.” I defended Victoria, after all she’s the girl I’ve been talking about, she’s the reason I fell in love for the first time and had my first heartbreak. She’s the reason I’m writing this. 

“You’re right, I’m sorry. She just gets on my nerves sometimes.” Jay admitted. “But why did you ignore her?” He asked again.

“Oh yeah, I didn’t notice her honestly. I was too busy thinking about someone I’m meeting today. Her name is Lucía and she’s gonna help me with my Spanish assignment. Do you know her?” I asked Jay out of curiosity.

“Lucía? Doesn’t ring a bell to be honest, how is she? Physically I mean” He replied.

“No clue, I’ve never met her. Riki asked her to help me ‘cause she’s a native speaker and she agreed.” I stated.

“Oh, well update me on that and good luck on that assignment. To this day I’m infinitely thankful I took French instead of spanish.” He laughed softly. I can really see why everyone has a crush on him, he’s really attractive.

After that we parted ways and I started thinking about the whole Victoria situation. How did I not notice? Was this study session causing me that much anxiety? I had taken my meds that day though, It shouldn’t have been that bad. I’m sure Lucía isn’t bad, not if she had agreed to help a stranger, me, out. 

I made my way to the café and when I finally entered I realized one crucial detail. 

I had no idea what she looked like.

What was I supposed to do? Should I call her? Text her? Stalk her socials and see if i can find a picture of her? I started to think of all these different scenarios and for some unknown reason I decided that the last option was the best, damn I was so stupid.

I typed her name on the Instagram search bar, ‘lucia’ and I clicked on the first profile that popped up, I knew it was her ‘cause of the mutuals we had and she had ‘belift highschool’ written on her bio. Luckily she was not private and so I clicked on her last posted picture, she looked so put together and clean. She had this preppy vibe to her to the point one would just assume she’s smart. A little further down her profile she had a couple of pictures with her friends and I recognized a guy named Sunoo there. I just knew he was a part of the school choir and participated in the singing competitions the school organized every year and he was a great singer. 

Lucía looked really familiar, I may have seen her roaming around the school before and I just didn’t notice. One thing that was consistent throughout her profile is that she has a cold aura to her, I can’t explain it but she just didn’t seem overly friendly and that worried me, just a tiny bit.

After I had taken in her face, I looked around a bit more to see if she was there and upon further inspection I concluded that she hadn’t arrived just yet and so I sent her a text telling her that I was already there and that I would wait for her on a table at the back next to the window, she immediately replied with a simple ‘omw.’

And so I waited for about five minutes setting the things I would need for the essay up until I heard the bell of the entrance ring, I looked up and I saw her in all her perfect glory. She was wearing a lavender sweater vest paired with a matching plaid skirt. Her hair was perfectly pin straight and she had hair clips clipping her hair away from her eyes in an elegant and effortless way. she really did live up to her Instagram theme.

She scanned the room for a bit before her eyes landed on me. She gave me a quick up and down and started walking towards me.

“Hi, I’m Lucía, nice to meet you.” She greeted me.

“Hey, I’m Jake, nice to meet you too. Thank you for being willing to help me out.” I greeted her back and thanked her for her kindness.

“No need to thank me.” She said as she sat down on the opposite side of the table. “What do you need help with? What’s the essay about?” She asked me.

“I have to write a fantasy story but I’ve been having a lot of trouble with grammar. It also has to have some specific things that Mr. Fernández told us, I wrote them down.” I explained.

“Oh, I thought it was going to be harder than that, I think we can finish today and don’t worry about the grammar, I’ll help you with it.” She said with that cold tone even if what she was saying was nice.

We spent two hours working on my assignment, the story had to be at least 5.000 words long so, of course we didn’t finish it but we were pretty proud of what we came up with before she had to leave. Her sister had called her ten minutes before letting her know she was on her way to go pick her up, I couldn’t exactly make out what they were saying considering that they were speaking Spanish and had an accent that Mr. Fernández didn’t share, looking back I now realized that they’re probably from different countries and I was too dumb to think about that. 

When Lucía told me she was leaving soon, she helped me pack my things up and agreed to meet up the next day. Lucía wasn’t as cold as she came across at first, she just had to warm up to you in order for her to show her true personality, she was still as eloquent, elegant and put together as always tho, just laughed a little more carelessly. 

Her sister texted her and let her know that she was parked right outside and sure enough, she was. I walked her outside to make sure she got into her sister’s car safely when I saw a familiar side profile on the passenger seat, that perfect nose was unmistakable

Park Sunghoon.

What was he doing there? He was probably friends with Lucía’s sister but I couldn’t recognize her. She was wearing a cap paired with the darkest sunglasses I had ever seen and before I could take a closer look, Lucía had already closed the car door and the unknown sister roared the engines from her gorgeous car back to life and the last thing I saw was Lucía’s and Sunghoon’s arms waving goodbye as the car drove down the streets. 

Huh.

***

This was my routine for almost a week until Lucía texted me and told me that she couldn’t make it to the café for whatever reason and politely asked me if I was comfortable enough to just go to her house instead. I had absolutely no reason to decline the offer so after school, I waited for her outside school and once together, we made our way to her house making small talk on our way there.

I expected her to live in a similar situation as mine, by that I mean a comfortable household where they didn’t exactly need anything but would appreciate it if they won the lottery some random day. That kind of family where both parents would work full-time jobs, arriving home at 6pm wishing they didn’t have work in something like finances or banking and had instead chased their dreams of acting or singing, or maybe even becoming well renowned painters. 

I was wrong.

I was oh so very wrong.

She lived in a mansion

A FUCKING MANSION FOR FUCKS SAKE OH MY. I did not expect her to be…rich, I mean she looked the part but I was always taught to not assume things about someone based on appearance but shit. The house was gorgeous, it was minimalistic but it didn’t seem dead, you could tell a happy family lived here or at least that’s what it seemed like. 

After my short paralyzation, Lucía took me upstairs to her bedroom. We passed many rooms on our way there and I’m sure I wouldn’t be able to go back on my own. It was like a maze and it may have been my imagination but she mentioned at least six bathrooms and about ten bedrooms. When we reached hers I noticed that it looked as clean and pristine as she did but it did have small decorations hinting at what she liked, I’m pretty sure I saw a Gojo figurine on a shelf. She had two candy wrappers on her bedside table and one half-empty glass of water. 

“You should do that too, you know?” She said out of the blue after catching me looking all over her room. 

“Do what?” I questioned.

“Keep a glass of water on your bedside table throughout the night, it’s supposed to absorb demons and bad entities, you have to flush it in the morning after you wake up though, I’ll do that now, be right back.” She cleared up as if it was the most normal thing in the world to have some cold demon tea every morning waiting for you. She didn’t seem like the superstitious type but then again, don’t judge a book by its cover.

After she came back with the now demon-less cup, she placed it on her nightstand and made her way to where I was sitting on her desk. She took a stool from somewhere in her room to take a seat and just like that we continued with the writing in hopes of finishing that very same day. We worked hard and long, when I thought my creativity was running low, Lucía came in clutch and suggested great ideas for the story and before we knew it, we were done.

“Where do you get all these ideas?” I asked, genuinely curious. I wanted to know.

“I used to read a lot before and my sister writes as a hobby. Sometimes when she’s in a slump she asks for help and we work it out together. It helps both of us honestly. I used to only value book-smart people but after understanding what it takes to be a creative person I now know that it takes just as much effort to come up with a good story or piece of art as to solve an equation. It just takes different skills and not everyone is gifted with them, some people, like me for example, think maths is the easiest subject at school but I’ve failed history twice. My sister is the complete opposite, she aces every history test she has ever done, same with english, but you give her one biology textbook and she crumbles. I think it’s important to acknowledge those types of differences for us to find something we’re good at and something that we like as well. Wow, I’m sorry I didn’t mean to ramble on like that. You should’ve stopped me Jake.”  Well that was a speech! but it was nice to hear her be so passionate about something like that for once, never thought she would open up to me like that ever. From this I can only assume her sister was criticized for this, I can only imagine how that impacted her and Lucía.

“Don’t even worry about it. You two must be pretty close then.” I calmed her nerves and pointed out hoping I hadn’t crossed any boundaries especially knowing we weren’t exactly close.

“Yeah, we are. We used to be closer before though, we’re still close don’t get me wrong but, she’s kind of letting herself go at this point. I don’t know why I’m telling you this, sorry if I'm making you uncomfortable.” She explained her sister’s situation.

“It’s okay, I’m here to listen. I do have one question though, who’s your sister?” I asked out of pure curiosity.

Lucía opened her mouth to say her sister’s name. Just as she produced one single vibration on her bottom lip with her top teeth the door burst open and in came the smell of that cheap perfume I'm a bit too familiar with and the one and only, my future heartbreaker and my past lover.

Victoria.

Fucking Victoria,I should have guessed as soon as I saw that one Gorillaz shirt I saw her wear yesterday peeking out of the door from one of the many rooms we passed. I should have guessed when I saw the bunny eras she wore once on her Instagram hanging from Lucía’s door. How didn’t I?

“Sim? Hi. Lucía, you know what mom says about boys or girls in the bedroom. Keep the door open please, I don’t wanna deal with her temper tantrums again. Also, why is the teacher’s pet here?” She acknowledged me first but she wasn’t… rude? I always expected her to be mean or something, for now she only seemed a bit cold but not as much as her sister.

The sisters engaged in conversation, Lucía answering all her questions and assuring she wouldn’t have to deal with their mom. They fell into a nice chit-chat about their day speaking in Spanglish, them making that silent agreement so that I wouldn’t assume they were speaking ill of me in a different language. 

“Sim, don’t ignore me like you did today again please, I was pretty embarrassed and I just wanted help with the physics homework. Do you think you can help me out? Don’t worry if you can’t.” She admitted, she seemed so genuine and she may have been but I’m pretty sure this was the last truth she ever told me.

“Yeah! Yeah sure, I’ll help you out.” I replied a little too enthusiastically for my liking and I’m pretty sure it didn’t go unnoticed by the two sisters. Now that I think about it and see them standing close to each other, they look really similar. They did have differences though, Victoria’s nose was slightly more up-turned that Lucía’s but it lacked the ‘button’ effect that Lucías nose had. Lucía’s dark circles under her eyes were not nearly as dark and prominent as Victoria’s and she had ‘cleaner’ makeup than her. Victoria’s eyes were slightly lighter too but the redness of them made this go unnoticed. 

I said goodbye to Lucía, thanking her for putting up with me and helping me out that week and I made sure to make a mental note to give her something in return. When Victoria and I made our way to her room, a loud silence fell upon us but Victoria made sure to quickly turn it down by talking about what exactly she was struggling with. We arrived at her room and she quickly got her things out, I never would have imagined she worried about having decent grades. As she got her things ready, I looked around her room and saw that it was much more decorated than Lucías room and it wasn’t subtle or minimalistic at all, it was also definitely messier than Lucías too. Her walls were covered with posters ranging from band posters to animation one, some even being Playboy magazine covers. They were very different.

She sat down on her bed and invited me to do the same and I immediately realized that her notebooks weren’t color-coordinated, some even being the same color. The edges of the pages being folded over each other by how carelessly they were treated but Victoria didn’t seem to mind. All her notes were taken with the same blue colored pen. no highlighter, no pretty lettering, no clean handwriting and no decorations. 

When I finished with my analysis of her, I fell into my tutor act and started hearing her out and helping her to the best of my abilities. Mid-way through our study session she asked me if I wanted to smoke, I declined of course, I didn’t smoke back then and just the mere thought of how dark and dirty someone’s lungs could get scared me shitless. Just as abruptly as we started, we were done. She was a fast learner and was willing to do her part of the work just fine. 

Getting to know this nice side of her made me realize that maybe, being friends wouldn’t be that bad, of course I was wrong but how did you expect 18 year-old Jake to know that? I was just an innocent kid.

We agreed that I would tutor her every week for some money in exchange, she persisted in paying me even after I reassured her it was fine.

As you can imagine, we continued to meet up. We started talking at school and honestly, it was all fine, it was all great even. Victoria introduced me to her group of friends Sunghoon and Jiung, who I mentioned before, Jongseob, Yeonjun, Ryujin, Yuna, Karina and Chaeryeong, there were probably more but those are who I remember the most, some were even younger than me. They all had the same vibe to them but I knew most, if not all, of them were heavily involved with music. When I was friends with them I got to hear a couple of their songs and they were pretty good, even if we’re not close anymore I hope someday they’ll make it into the industry, they were nice to me. 

We started meeting up after school, I started to fall back in all my schoolwork and my parents started to worry. They talked to me and told me that they were there for me if I ever needed their support, that made me so fucking sad, I was dissapointed at myself for worrying my parents but… I didn’t stop.

I started drinking with Victoria, just the two of us but she made me feel safe. I knew I wasn’t at risk if I got drunk with her by my side, she promised to take care of me and she did, for a while at least. After I got used to drinking she convinced me to try smoking, I have no idea how she did that, she’s just so charming and persuasive, she was so dangerous but I never listened to my own body. My body was telling me to stop, all this was getting too much. I developed some very ugly coughing that lasted for a while. My parents insisted on getting me checked but I tried my best at lying to them and telling them it was just allergies and that the coughing would eventually fade. My coughs drew blood from my throat more times than I cared to admit but I did it for her.

I didn’t want her to leave me because I didn’t drink, because I was boring or because I asked her not to smoke when I was around. I don’t know why I stayed. You know what? Scratch that, I do. I was madly madly in love with this girl, so much so that I compromised my future for her, I sacrificed my health for her. I let myself go and for what? We weren’t even together. She didn’t even like me like that. 

I was tired of waiting for her to hint at me that she liked me back or at least reciprocated the tiniest bit of my neverending unconditional love for her. I was sick and tired of waiting. I was sick of seeing her flirt with everyone at the party but me. I was tired of seeing her all lovey-dovey with Chaeryeong, for fucks sake she probably had more feelings for her than for me but I was too blinded by what I had seen before to see that. 

This reminds me of a conversation I had with Jay when he noticed I was slipping.

“Dude, you gotta open your eyes. Look around! What good does Victoria bring you? And don’t give me some bullshit excuse, not again.” He reproached me as a good and worried best friend. That’s the thing I regret the most, taking Jay for granted.

“She brings me happiness Jay! I love her, I truly do and it’s not my fault you don’t understand that.” I shouted back much more aggressively than him but I was getting tired of this, of all of this. 

“She’s using you.”

“She’s not.” I corrected.

“She is! Everyone knows she likes that bimbo from class H.” 

“She doesn’t Jay! Why can’t you understand? I’ve never seen them interact before in my life and even if they had, what Victoria and I have is mutual.” I kept lying to myself, I knew damn well Jay saw them together all the time, they did have French together after all. Hell, I wasn’t even sure what bimbo out of all the ones I knew he was talking about. 

“Jake please, I don’t want you getting hurt.” Jay pleaded with me, he was desperate for his friend. He didn’t want me getting hurt but I just saw this as a selfish action. I thought he was just jealous of me, how could I be so blind?

“You haven’t seen what I’ve seen.” I croaked out, my voice shaky at this point and my throat raw from the screaming and back and forth arguing.

“AND YOU DON’T FUCKING SEE WHAT I SEE JAKE! LOOK IN THE MIRROR, LOOK AT YOUR TEACHER, LOOK AT YOU FUCKING PARENTS FOR FUCKS SAKE. I’VE BEEN TRYING TO GET SOME SENSE THROUGH YOUR THAT THICK SKULL OF YOURS BUT YOU JUST WON'T LISTEN!” He fell silent. “Please, please Jake. Get out of there.”

“No.”

“No?”

“No, It’s not my problem no one wants to be with you. It’s not my problem you’re jealous of me. It’s not my problem that no one fucking likes you. Fuck you Jay.” I could barely get these words out. I knew what I was saying was the worst thing he ever heard from me. I hurt my best friend and not slightly, I carved into his beating heart and brain that no one loves him. It was as If his eyes held his heart at that very moment, I swear I saw his heart break through his eyes and I saw the tears build up on them before my own vision became too blurry to even distinguish the doorframe. 

Even after this, I continued seein Victoria and I could proudly say we were in an official exclusive couple. I was happy. The girl that I devoted my entire being to accepted my love confession and agreed to be with me but that feeling very deep in my heart didn't let me be happy. I knew it was wrong and that I hurt people in the way but I had spent so much time on her that I couldn’t bring myself to turn back, not then. 

As I’m sure it won’t surprise you, I found out she was only with me because she felt terribly sorry about me, how did she fucking dare? I gave her everything. She somehow found out about my fight with Jay and she felt pity toward me. While she was with me, she continued to date around. The only thing is she was extra careful that I wouldn’t find out and it worked, she successfully cheated on me with multiple people for two years. She didn’t see our relationship as a romantic one, she saw it as some type of charity work as if she was helping me out in some way. I gave her my all. She was my first everything, if I ever tried something for the first time, it would be because of her, hell she even got me to try Mary Jane once. I hate her for it, I really do. She took advantage of me in so many ways and she jsut acted all stupid and oblivious about it. She broke me but didn’t even bother to but my pieces close to each other, she left me broken all over the floor, stepping over me and on me whenever she could.

I wished she had just stayed as a hallway crush. I wish Riki had never asked me what was wrong. I wish I had never gone to Lucías house. I really fucking wish I had never said those things to Jay. I wish I had told my parents the truth and I really wish I had a genie to grant all these wishes.

Some years have passed but the heartbreak and regret remain. Amazingly, my grades were good enough for the college I wanted and the first day of classes I saw Jay. I explained everything you just read and apologized profusely, I still apologize to this day but we are closer than ever. Riki told me Lucía went back to her native country, Chile, he told me she missed it there but he also told me Victoria got into some big trouble for messing with something… I can’t say what it was though. I’m pretty sure Jiung and Jongseob are pursuing careers in music. 

I will never forget Victoria in the worst way possible. I hate her with all my heart and I will always always resent her for too many things. I know a lot of the responsibility is on me but still, spare me some slack, I was eighteen and I had never had any female contact in my life. I’m happy I can somewhat joke about it now. It still hurts but I have to move on and that’s what I’m working on right now. 

Well, that was the story, a bit boring if you ask me but it’s my life. I would have added a star wars and harry potter crossover but apparently that is “not credible” and “stupid” acording to some Park Jongseong.

I always thought I would fall in love with someone like me, a stereotypical “good person”, responsible, sporty, preppy, smart, clean, put together, basically Lucía. All the girls I had ever been interested in before were like her, granted, I was never in love before but the possiblity of me being attracted to the complete opposite of me seemed very unlikely. 

Of course the universe had to prove me wrong.

Sincerely,

Sim Jaeyun.