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Lee Jihye - Blog Posts
kim namwoon, han donghoon, lee jihye and jang hayoung in class playing around for @/meemox0 - thank you for participating in @orv-gotcha-for-gaza !
the relationship between kim dokja and lee jihye is one of my favourites honestly. she jokes around and insults him a lot, but shes also consistently absolutely devastated when he dies, looks up to him but will never admit it, and even takes on some of his self sacrificing tendencies in the demon castle arc. he really is her loser step dad she makes fun of all the time but still gets really excited when he shows up to her baseball game
/ cw death , suicidal thoughts
unnamed regression (read left to right)
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![[Note: round brackets are ljh's thoughts that are not inside the drawn text boxes]
Ljh narration: I never wanted to find out,
I never
Ljh narration: (This is real) (This is fake) (This is how it is) (This is just a bad dream)
Ljh narration: I never wished to wake up so badly](https://64.media.tumblr.com/ade0f19f6ebeaa790b73308fe865a228/bc39cdacce75703b-1d/s500x750/95e77b9db9252ad276b257c5a69ba51628eebfae.jpg)
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Extra note:
These two panels were arranged to look like "■■" because I thought maybe her ■■ would be tied to yjh saving her and her bringing it to a close. Despite this, there is a text box awkwardly separating it, it's not so much of a satisfying ■■ for her.
Yoo Joonghyuk x Reader; A story of two regressors
Haha didn’t think I would do ORV? Y’all I need more orv fics, HUGE novel spoilers so beware, but no explicit spoilers so if you are only WEBTOON reader and have no context of the novel you may end up confused, I will write novel free version, and it will be available later this week or next week so stay tuned!
You both were the same, yet different
The both of you had been given the skill “regression,” and thus you both had agreed to be companions, before Kim Dokja appeared followed by a noticeable Han Sooyoung. Beforehand it was just the two of you, the both of you bled together and teamed up in the previous regressions, the two of you wholly relied on each other and swore to always to keep the other in check, regardless of how far along you would be.
When you both met, it was your 0th turn and his first turn. You both were in different cabs and came out of the train, along with Kim Namwoom and Lee Hyunsung. Eventually meeting Lee Jihye and recruiting her aswell saving Lee Seolhwa from Anitus. You barely recall what had happened in that regression aside from bonding with the crew and having a playful relationship with Yoo Joonghuk, you teased him a lot, trained with him, and the two of you became each others support, each others weight. Was that to say the two of you were romantically involved? No, both of you were prioritizing your survival and plus, Yoo Joonghyuk had his little sister to protect. Regardless, you bonded over your power aswell as the fact that you would see each other again in the next life, until your quick end came within a few scenarios.
When you woke in your 1st regression, you recall Joonghyuk calling for you, clearly a bit disheveled, you were happy to see he also was sent back, but sad when you realised your old companions weren’t. It was hard, you couldn’t reminisce with Jihye about the early scenarios, couldn’t bring up the funny moments with Namwoon, or even small talks with Hyunsung unless they happened again…but even if it did they…felt so different. You recalled how Joonghyuk was a bit colder in that round, but still a bit hopeful nonetheless, and then the both of you were approached by Anna Croft, where you found suspicion, he took the offer she gave, an offer to save the world.
Once again Lee Seolhwa was in your group except her relationship with Joonghyuk was much more…comfortable I suppose. You thought you had seen his eyes linger on her on the previous round, and now you were sure because it was clear he had feelings for her. You often told him not to let his feelings take over, for they were in the middle of survival and loving someone would just be tragic, yet he continued to love, and while you warned him for his own good you couldn’t help but feel…petty.
You watched as they would eventually get married, and eventually they even were going to have a child, and while you supported them every step of the way your heart continued to ache, and then Anna Croft betrayed you all. You recall how Joonghyuk cried when his sister died, he looked to desperate at that time, but when Seolhwa and his unborn child died he went mad, so mad that he accidentally killed you, but even as you were dying you held on him tight, hugging him, apologising for being weak and promising you will be there in the next round. By the time he was able to snap out of it he cradled your body, and for the last time he cried, and then it all went black.
When you met in the next regression, his third one, everything that you had gone through felt so…distorted, it was as if after all of that time you went through hundreds if not thousands of regressions ahead rather than just one… but when you met Joonghyuk who looked rather shaken but closed off completely you confirmed it was the 3rd round, after all if it wasn’t the third round what round would it be, a secret unknown round hundreds of rounds ahead?
This round was much different, he considered you his companion but he was so cold, he monopolised what he could and was different from before, but it was understandable considering what he had went through. On top of that not only was Kim Namwoon dead and other people had survived, a suspicious man named Kim Dokja also appeared and had known the future. It was interesting, he knew of Yoo Joonghyuk but when he looked at you he seemed confused, and he was pale when Joonghyuk said you were his companion of his last two rounds despite Dokjas offer, but it wasn’t as if it was because you had taken the offer, it was if you were an anomaly, a glitch in the system, something that wasn’t supposed to exist, or maybe he didn’t know you existed as he seemed confused about your presence. It was different for you as you seemed to have recognized him, you never seemed to have met him but he looked so…familar. He wanted to help, but the last time Joonghyuk trusted someone both of you died horribly, so he tested him by throwing him off the bridge and sure enough, he proved himself through the scenarios.
It was the three of you until Han Sooyoung came along, another woman along with Sangah, Heewon, and Gilyoung who looked familar…it made you think every time you were stumped, but you guys remained close nonetheless. You would train, laugh when Kim Dokja did something to irritate him, and Joonghyuk would try his best to comfort you when you felt like you were gonna go into the regression depression just as you would with him(Though Kim Dokja was the one who would help the most.) There were times where he would even doze off near you, times where he would cook for you and times he would leave you with Yoo Mia, and if either of you “rested your eyes” on each others shoulder, nobody would say a word.
“Do you think this time we will make it to the end?” He asked you surprisingly, you thought his optimism was gone but it seemed that he still had hope left. “I don’t want to get our hopes up but…we have Kim Dokja so I’m sure we will be fine…” You trailed off, but he knew you were worried, he patted your head as he took his leave out of the base. Strange, he didn’t do that ever in this round…
Kim Dokja always took the lead rather than Joonghyuk this time around, and you were grateful as he always protected every one (at the expense of his safety unfortunately, which you would bonk him over the head for.) But even so, the way he always looked at you was so…off, it wasn’t jealousy, in fact Han Sooyoung who often was with Dokja in terms of plans even looked at you confused and suspiciously, it was as if you had never existed beside Yoo Joonghyuk, which couldn’t be true, you were in Joonghyuk previous regressions right? They knew Jihye, Hyunsung, Seolhwa, aswell as others and knew how things worked, and yet when it came to you… perhaps it was some prank as the two were always together, it had to be right? After all you were in the last [redacted] regressions-
“Wait, what did I just say..?” You thought as you blacked out
you were in a dark abyss, but you could hear voices around you, some were panicked and others were calm, and a huge amount of memories flooded through you, yet you couldn’t pick through any of them, they were all distorted, and suddenly you heard a deep but clear voice.
“A shame really,” the deep voice said as you felt a gloved hand stroke your cheek, “after all of those rounds of suffering, I’m left to see him reap the rewards? A companion who could regress despite the presence being non existent before hand.” What? “And a companion who knows the future, and yet that person remains as arrogant and ungrateful as ever.” He wasn’t referring to you, he was referring to that person. You wanted to see who was infront of you, or seemed to be in front of you, but the hands moved from you cheek to your eyes and covered it as your body, “relax,” the voice said somewhat gently, “you will be back with HIM soon.” As you felt your body becoming more relaxed and heavy, you heard him mention that person again, aswell as some mumbling, but there was one sentence you could hear from him clearly, and from the direction of his voice you knew it wasn’t towards you, but towards that person again, and his voice carried both resentment, and sadness;
“Why is it not me but you?”
Credits go to the ORV Novel and its amazing authors, I hope you enjoyed this story! I won’t deny that I actually tried to dig a bit into lore with this fic! I have no plans to write any sort of series in regards to my lore, but I do have an idea of the lore. If I ever do put it out there someone, as long as they credit me can do it in my stead! Farewell!
happy new yuri sangsoo nation!<33
rereading the lee jihye cinema scene is really making me think about the parallels between kim dokja and lee jihye in ways that are so evil. like the point of this scene is lee jihye grappling with her trauma from killing na bori with kim dokja's help, with him telling her that its true she did a terrible thing but that all that matters now is she lived, and that she has to continue living. "Atone for the rest of your life or live a garbage life. Just somehow survive!"
lee jihye did something horrible to someone who loved her deeply in order to survive. the fact that na bori gave up her life willingly doesn't ease lee jihye's guilt - she still feels as though she doesn't deserve to be alive. and kim dokja feels so much compassion for her in this moment! he sees her for what she is - a terrified kid who just wanted to live - and fights for her to survive. he encourages her and empathizes with her and generally does his best to ensure she can live on even with all her guilt because he doesn't see her wanting to survive even at the cost of others as an unforgiveable crime.
which makes the fact you can see the clear parallels between lee jihye and the oldest dream here so much more heartbreaking. the oldest dream is an extension of the message that kim dokja passes onto lee jihye here - no matter what, you must somehow survive. thats what the oldest dream's existence is, a kid trying to somehow survive. that desperation is what his all powerful dreams are born out of. he pushes orv's message about living having a cost, and having to bear that cost, to its extreme - oldest dream's survival was very expensive indeed, causing incalculable suffering across universes and taking 1864 of yoo joonghyuk's lives. this is something kim dokja has to bear to keep living - its something hes unable to. orv forgives him for this, but he does not. both lee jihye and oldest dream are kids who want to live, both hurt those closest to them in the process, both are unable to live with that guilt even when absolved of it by the very person they hurt.
but where kim dokja empathizes with lee jihye, where he cares for her, where he sees her as still deserving of a future, he is unable to do so for himself. even in this very scene he is chastising himself for 'using' her, for doing what he has to to survive in an apocalypse, unable to see the irony. all of his companions have made horrible choices to survive in the apocalypse, all of them have chosen to live at an inevitable cost of someone else. and yet kim dokja holds only himself accountable for the crime of survival. it really exposes this supposed accountability for what it is - a deep self-loathing disguised. if it had been any other child sitting at that subway station, kim dokja would have understood. but because it was himself? of course he reacted with disgust and violence - look at the entire book. he's never been able to do anything else when it comes to himself! even when he cares so deeply for the others....oh kim dokja.....
lee jihye side story where she experiences yuri again. i just think after years of hanging out with literal children and Hot Milfs In Her Area she deserves some good standard wholesome university au yuri. is this anything