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Michael The Good Place - Blog Posts
Bill: "So, Frills, just wanted to double check. How do ethical beings feel about murder?"
The Axolotl: "It's frowned upon."
(Incorrect Quote sourced from the episode "Derek" of the series "The Good Place".)
*The Pines Family (and Bill) are gathered together in the Mystery Shack's living room as Mabel attempts to teach a lesson about ethics using the infamous trolley problem. Bill is fixated on doodling on the paper he's holding*
Mabel: "Bill. You've been quiet. What do you think about this?"
Handyman Bill: "Well, obviously the dilemma is clear: How do you kill all six people?"
*He turns the paper he was drawing on around, so that the Pines can see it properly. It's a vivid depiction of bloodshed and massacre utilizing creative methods that only a psychopath could think of...which he is. Sparkly, red glitter is glued on to color and illustrate the blood rushing from the victims' wounds*
Bill: "Well, I would dangle a sharp blade out of a window to slice the neck of the guy on the other track as we swoosh our five main guys."
*He looks around expectantly only to be met with tired expressions, too used to this kind of mayhem*
Bill: "Oh... I did the thing again, didn't I?"
Mabel: "Yeah. Ten more more, buddy."
*She flips around the blackboard she had borrowed from Ford to use for her lesson to reveal hundreds of "People=Good" messages scribbled on the other side in chalk*
Bill: "People. Good. People... Why is that so hard to remember? "
(The "Handyman Bill AU" was created by @/LosanPostle and @/waty_mot on Twitter)
(Incorrect Quote sourced from the episode "The Trolley Problem" of the series "The Good Place".)
me when the non-human character wants to be human:
