Damian Wayne - Blog Posts

Jason, kissing Roy: Hey sweetheart.

Roy, kissing back: What’s up, babe.

Oliver: Did we miss something?

Dick: Oh, no no, they’re just playing a game, no biggie.

Bruce: What game?

Tim: It’s called gay chicken. The point of the game is for two guys to pretend to be gay together for as long as possible.

Damian: and whoever chickens out first loses.

Clark: And how long has it been since they are, uh… pretending?

Dick: Three weeks.

Bruce:

Oliver:

Roy (Arsenal), leaning over: They’re pretty stubborn.

*** Later***

Jason: no but seriously, did you see their faces?

Roy: I knOw. Ollie looked like he wanted to cry *laughs*

Jason, looking at Roy: now we just have to tell them that we are dating, not playing gay chicken.

Roy: *sigh* Ollie's going to have a stroke.

Damian: It’s dark in here Jon: Don’t worry dude I got this Jon: *Stomps their feet* Jon: *Skechers light up*

Damian: *at night in bed after being drugged up because of injuries* good night moon

Damian: good night tree

Damian: good night ghosts only i can see

Dick, who was tucking him in: *shaking*

*Later*

Dick, still shaking and mumbling under his breath: ghosts? martha? Thomas?

Jason, walks around a corner:

Dick:*Screams*

Dick: oh its just you. thought Dami was right about the gohsts for a minute.

Jason: he is

Dick: what?

Jason: what?

Damian: Time for plan G. Bruce: Don’t you mean plan B? Damian: No, we tried plan B a long time ago. I had to skip over plan C due to technical difficulties. Dick: What about plan D? Damian: Plan D was that desperate disguise attempt half an hour ago. Steph: What about plan E? Damian: I’m hoping not to use it. Timothy dies in plan E. Jason: I like plan E.

Damian: Croissants: dropped Jason: Road: works ahead Dick: BBQ sauce: on my titties Tim: Shavacado: fre Steph: Miss Keisha: fuckin dead Jason: Bruce, grumpy: I didn’t understand a single word of that and I hate every single one of you.

Chapters: 17/17 Fandom: Batman - All Media Types, Justice League - All Media Types, Young Justice (Cartoon) Rating: Not Rated Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death Relationships: Jason Todd & Damian Wayne Characters: Jason Todd, Damian Wayne, Bruce Wayne, Dinah Lance, Diana (Wonder Woman), Hal Jordan (Green Lantern), Barry Allen, Clark Kent, Jon Lane Kent, Talia al Ghul, Arthur Curry (DCU), J'onn J'onzz, Oliver Queen, Hawkwoman (DCU), Hawkman, Patrick "Eel" O'Brian, Red Tornado, John Stewart (DCU), Zatanna Zatara, Mari Jiwe McCabe, Billy Batson, Doctor Fate, Guy Gardner, Helena Bertinelli, Wally West, Kon-El | Conner Kent, M'gann M'orzz, Artemis Crock, Kaldur'ahm | Jackson Hyde, Dick Grayson, Tim Drake, Cassandra Cain, Duke Thomas, Pamela Isley, Harleen Quinzel Additional Tags: Protective Damian Wayne, Protective Jason Todd, Jason Todd and Damian Wayne Meet in the League of Assassins, Jason Todd and Damian Wayne are Siblings, Damian Wayne is Shrike, Jason Todd is Red Hood, batman is confused, but so is everyone?, Timeline What Timeline, Jason Todd Has Issues, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Bruce Wayne is a Bad Parent, to Jason at least Series: Part 1 of Lost birds Summary:

What if Jason never returned to Gotham but instead stole his little brother away from the LoA.

The JL is looking for more members and two new candidates seem to be The Red Hood and Shrike. The duo have been travelling around America, fighting crime and saving people, but not in Gotham. Batman is the only one who opposes this because no matter what, he can’t work out who they are.

The two heroes are trying to make better lives but there is only so much you can do when both your parents are partially insane, one doesn't know you are still alive/exist, and one will tear the globe apart to find her sons.

he definitely got the obsessive adopting gene

Damian: *surrounded by ducks*

Damian: follow me, my children

Damian: GRAYSON! TODD! The girls wanted me to inform the both of you that they have challenged you to a water fight.

Dick: oooooooh we haven't done that in a while.

Damian: yes they will perish beneath us. We will drive them to the ground! WE WILL-

Dick: ok-ay. Jay, you coming?

Jason: gimmie a sec. The water js almost finished boiling.

Damian:

Dick:

Duke, who listened to it all from a concealed area of the room: THE FUCKING WHAT?!

I’m gonna be writing a fic to get my mind off of the election, don’t mind me-

Headcannon that due to diligently monitoring the Wayne family’s media image, Alfred is chronically online, and as such, is constantly dropping slang into conversation like-

(Over the coms)

Batman: Alfred, what’s the update on the Arkham situation?

Alfred: *Ahem* Unfortunately sir, it is as they say- ‘we’re cooked’

Collective groans from Tim, Dick, and Jason over the coms

Batman: …Huh?

Jason: *muttering* I knew I should’ve stayed outa this one…

Damian: I don’t understand, what are we cooking?

Alfred: It’s giving ‘failure era’, sir-

Dick: Damn it!

Tim: We really are cooked

Damian: What does that -?

Alfred: It’s lowkey not-

Batman: In English Alfred. Please.

Alfred: *Sigh* My apologies, sir. The Joker has escaped.

No i'm so fucking serious who in the hell is Hamilton?

No seriously tho

Batfam as things my family said pt.2

Jason(while robin): if i'm 25 and not covered in tattoos and have a motorcycle punch me in the face

steph: i’m convinced men are the ones with periods

dick: the eggs were carbonated

tim: i feel like a flintstone

babs: the mormons are out-

duke: actually ima be a stripper now

tim: what's goin on single fucks?

damian(talking to tim): i'm gonna put you in a box and send you to north Korea

bruce(to dick): what kind of crack are you on?!

dick(to bruce): the good kind obviously😃🔫

damian: i am not a demon for you to summon

cass: i have the butt of a ballon dog

batfam as things me and my family have said

Damian (talking to alfred the cat): don't put your butt on my drink

tim (referring to steph): holy batman she's pmsing

jason: if you value your life don't bring bruce into this

dick: i drank an egg 1/10 don't reccomend

steph: oh the little white man!

tim: i look straight and i hate it

damian: bernard wants you sent away drake he said so himself

steph: oh the purple nurple really got him

No seriously tho

Jason in the manor for movie night: How'd you convince B to let me in anyways? I thought I wouldn't get an invite till I dropped the real bullets.

Dick busy trying to wrangle Damian away from Tim and Titus away from the snacks: B is really bad at facing the words he throws around ya know? So I told him since it's my fault you died I should be responsible for bringing you home- Tim don't!!!

Jason: B said what!?!?

damian: you bumbling bafoon! never in my life have i met such a -

jason: big words considering i fucked your mom.

dick: YOU DID WHAT?!

jason: oops

this is the ONLY damian wayne design i accept by the way. brown skin, a crooked nose, dark green eyes and thick eyebrows. keep that white-washed monstrosity away from me