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Lily: *clicks pen*
Severus: *clicks pen in response*
James: Stop that.
Lily: Stop what?
James: You’re talking about me in Morse code!
Lily: Yes, that’s what we doing. In our very limited time, we took a class on a very outdated, very unnecessary form of communication just so we could talk about you in front of you. Congrats, you figured us out!
*later*
Severus, to Remus: That’s actually exactly what we were doing.
Severus: Alright, which one of us is gonna check outside?
Sirius: Not it!
James: Not it!
Severus: ...Neither one of you are as dumb as you lead on to be.
Severus: James and I are no longer dating.
James: Severus, that’s a horrible way of telling people we’re married.
James: I think we should kiss.
Severus: And I think you should die but we don’t always get what we want.
Alright! Chapter one is done and up! The title is 'Severus Snape, Harry Potter and the annoying gryffindor's' (I couldn't think of a good title) anyway here's the link (please give me feedback)
Y'all remember that post of me wanting a sev x marauders baby harry time travel au? Yeah I'm making that shit now it's gonna be on ao3 I've already got most of chapter one done. It's set in their 4th year so shit's salvageable, I might make other fic's tied to it like a before and after, I really wanna make the playlist into fic's so I'll be adding that.
¿Would anyone read it?
Y'all remember that post of me wanting a sev x marauders baby harry time travel au? Yeah I'm making that shit now it's gonna be on ao3 I've already got most of chapter one done. It's set in their 4th year so shit's salvageable, I might make other fic's tied to it like a before and after, I really wanna make the playlist into fic's so I'll be adding that.
¿Would anyone read it?
So I found this fic on AO3 where Severus meets and gets sorta adopted by his grandparents (on Eileen's side) I can't remember their names but they were both males and I think one was a male-carrier, Eileen wasn't nice in this one, something happened and James sent an owl to several and decided to follow it, he found out sev was being abused and took him back to Potter manor, the healer recognized Severus and contacted his grandfather's, Lucius was a good friend and kept checking on sev, Remus's father was not that great but having met a werewolf auror who helped him with fixing his relationship with his son and understanding werewolves better, they fall in love, Lily's a bitch who was stealing her parents money and sneaking out and bullying petunia, I think it's snames or maybe snupin I can't remember. Or marauders X Severus I really don't know
OH! and the marauders (except Peter) start working at a potion shop!
James: Severus... you've been cuddling with me for over and hour now.
Severus: *muffled* mm hmmm :)
James: Fuck. I should be annoyed but you're adorable.
So I made a Severus Snape playlist, I had some dreams of Hogwarts marauders era and I had music playing,I can't sleep without noise, and in my dream young Severus Snape was singing and dancing with the other Slytherins, they were sorta like a band the they being (Severus, Lucius, Regulus, narcissa and Bellatrix), so it was like a flirty, angry sad and in love Severus Snape and he was just singing his thoughts and emotions the things he felt and a lot of the lyrics were altered to best fit him. And now I can't get it out of my head so I made a playlist with my dream in mind, I quit like it. You can imagine him singing about anyone, to anyone, any ships or friendships you want, ect.
✨let me know what you all think✨
I want a Severus X marauders (excluding Peter) where it's like those jeverus fics where baby harry goes back in time and then shocks everyone by being the child of James and sev.
Like this⬇
Dumbledore finds baby harry and baby harry tells who his parents are and for his own amusement during lunch in the great Hall he makes the announcement that a baby has traveled back in time and that his future parents have to take care of him till they can figure out how to send him back
Everyone is silent waiting for home to announce the parents "Harry's Father's-" whispers "fathers? " "what-? " "was it an affair or? " "I wonder who-" "SILENCE" ".... " "as I was saying Harry's fathers.. Yes more than one harry has three fathers and one mother. It was not an affair it seems that the three fathers had fallen for the same person and that person loved them all and didn't wish to choose. So they all formed a relationship. " "..wow" "I will now call each father to come up here to meet little harry" (shush he wants drama that's why he's making the come to everyone's view" ".. James Potter" ! James walks up to Dumbledore and instantly loves harry "Sirius Black" Sirius looks surprised but goes up next to James and looks at his future son "he looks a lot like you James" "I know! " *ahem* "and the last father...Remus Lupin" Remus freezes before hesitantly going up and looks at harry "wow... I didn't think I'd have a kid"-R " I didn't think we'd all have a and kid and relationship with the same person! "-J " well we always share"-S "and now for Harry's mother.. " everyone is quite then Severus, who wasn't interested, starts to leave and harry See's.
Harry perks up and runs from his fathers toward Snape and screams "MOMMY!" Sev feels a tiny body ramming into his leg, he looks down at harry shocked he goes to tell him that's absurd but his heart melts as he looks at harry clinging to him and instead picks him up and smiles at harry and softly talks to him, without realizing it he instantly went into mommy mode, while everyone is silently flipping their shit, Remus being the first to calm down goes up to sev and harry
And you can make up the rest. I just wanna find a fic like that 😢🥺
More incorrect quotes
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Severus: Start talking!
James: Well, I-
Severus: Shut up!
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James: This date is boring!
Severus: This isnt a date. I said I was going to the store.
James: Then why did you invite me?
Severus: I didnt, I specifically said "dont come with me" then you said " fuck you Severus I'll do whatever I want!
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Severus: Bro-
James: No, no, hold up, rewind.
James: My tongue was down in your throat just a second ago and now you're calling me bro??
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Sirius: Oh, my God. Do you know what this is?
Severus: It’s a book. There’s a lot of those in here, this is a library.
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James: Can I ask a dumb question?
Severus: Better than anyone I know.
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Remus: Why should I make my bed, when I'm just gunna unmake it to sleep in it anyways?
Severus: Why should I feed you if your just gunna die anyways?
Remus:
Remus: I'll go make my bed-
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Severus: Remus, get that hidious thing out of the living room, would you?
Remus: Sirius, Severus wants you to get out of the house.
***********************
Remus, bursting into the room: You two are having sex!
Severus, not looking up from their book: Really? James, why didn’t you tell me? I would have put my book down.
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Sirius: It’s impossible to make a sentence without using the letter a.
Severus: Despite your thinking, it is quite possible, yet difficult, to form one without the specific letter. Here’s one more to further disprove your theory.
James: Fuck you.
*********************
Sirius: Severus, I am questioning your sanity...
James: I never questioned it, I knew their sanity was missing from the start.
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James: Remus, I’m afraid.
Remus: Just stay close to Severus.
James: That's why I’m afraid.
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Remus: And now for a gay update with Severus and Sirius.
Sirius: Getting gayer.
Remus: Thank you, Sirius.
******************
Remus: H-how do you ask someone out?
Sirius: Well, first-
Severus: Don't ask him, he asked me out in a McDonalds parking lot.
Remus: ...And you said yes?
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James: When you work at lush and a customer comes in and bites the soap because they think it’s cheese... this happens way more frequently than you think.
Severus: If you stopped literally presenting soap as deli food this wouldn't happen.
James: Who goes into a bath store and thinks something covered in glitter is cheese?
Remus: Who goes to the store and just takes a bite from the cheese?
****************
Sirius: Let’s watch Sharkboy and Lavagirl.
Severus: Okay.
Sirius: And make out during the scary parts.
Severus: Th-
Severus: The scary parts.
Severus: Of Sharkboy and Lavagirl.
***************
Severus: Look, last night was a mistake.
Sirius: A sexy mistake.
Severus: No, just a regular mistake.
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Severus, after getting a job as a life guard: Hmm... I wonder what those things at the bottom of the pool are..
Remus: THOSE ARE PEOPLE DROWNING!
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Remus: *angrily presses Severus against a wall* WHERE'S THE CHOCOLATE?!
Severus: ...
Severus: Are we about to kiss-
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Severus: You know you've made it when you see your picture everywhere you go.
Remus: Those are wanted posters!
***********
Severus: Okay, I’m going to get the wedding cake.
James: Perfect, while you do that I’ll check on the ring bear.
Severus: ...
Severus: You mean ring bearER, right?
James: ...
Severus: Look me in the eyes and tell me you are not going to bring a dangerous wild animal to our wedding.
**********
*James and Severus looking at a locked gate into a park*
James: Aw. :(
Severus: You know what they say.
James: Please don’t-
Severus: BE GAY DO CRIME! *hops gate*
James: Fuck-
*********
Severus: Watcha doin?
James: Stealing my neighbour’s cat.
Severus: Scandalous.
Severus: Can I help?
********
James: I got grounded for a whole week just because I came home late.
Severus: Well, you deserved it. I mean, getting everyone's hopes up like that and then showing up again.
*******
Severus: What's gone wrong, James?
James: Hey! That’s one hell of a thing to say to a person. Just because I’m calling doesn’t mean there’s a crisis.
Severus: That’s technically true, I suppose. Why are you calling?
James: Well... There’s a crisis.
******
Severus: I’ve never been in a snowball fight before. I don’t know the rules.
James: What?
Severus: Is there a point system, or is it to the death?
*****
Sirius, dramatically: They called me a fool.
Severus, sick of Sirius's shit: They weren’t wrong.
****
Severus: I truly go into housewife mode when I'm someone's soulmate- like, I'll make you pancakes and bacon every morning.
Sirius: This is a lie.
Sirius: I'm literally dating them. This is a lie.
Sirius: THEY DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO COOK A PANCAKE, WHAT IS THIS.
***
Severus: You shouldn't be using a straw.
Sirius: I know, I know, it's bad for the environment and stuff.
Severus: Yeah, but I mean... it's a weird way to eat spaghetti.
**
Sirius: We all have our demons.
Sirius, grabbing Severus: This one’s mine.
*
Sirius: What goes up but never comes down?
Severus: The amount of stress you're bringing this family.
I decided to use an otp prompt generator and these are what I got (someone please make these into one shots) +(some NSFW)
Your prompt: Severus and Remus are walking home from school; work; etc and on the way to their house, Remus picks up a stick. All of the sudden, Remus runs up to a tree and starts to hit the tree with the stick while yelling Quit hitting yourself! Quit hitting yourself, and Severus starts to laugh until they cry.
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Your prompt: NSFW Severus is tied to the bed. Remus leaves them there for a while with the promise of really pleasurable, hardcore, bondage fucking. Severus is so horny and can’t stand waiting to the point where they’re literally screaming for Remus to just do them already.
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Your prompt: Severus and Sirius are fooling around and Sirius says "Oh shut up! I know you love me!" to which Severus responds with "I'd sell you to Satan for a single corn chip.".
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Your prompt: NSFW
Sirius: Hey I think my dick died.
Severus: It died?
Sirius: Yeah, can I bury it in your ass?
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Your prompt: James has an online buisness meeting with someone important who lives across the world so they stay up until 12:00 for the meeting. Severus doesn't want to leave James alone so they grab a blanket and lay in James's lap as they attend the meeting. Bonus if: Severus accidentally smacks James on the face in their sleep and everyone in the meeting says that they're cute.
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Your prompt: NSFW Severus's wearing tight yoga pants that accentuates their ass and James is trying their hardest not to jump them in public. All bets are off once they enter their house though. What happens next is up to you.
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Your prompt: Remus tilting Severus's chin up to get a better look at their face and the evidence of the fight. Remus delicately thumbs away a streak of blood from Severus's mouth, saying nothing as they examine it. After a breif pause, Severus's heart skips a nervous beat as Remus looks them dead in the eyes. Their voice is quiet and tense. Their anger barely restrained.
"Who did this to you?"
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Your prompt: NSFW Remus ties open Severus's legs and goes down on them for hours, making Severus cry out from cumming so much that it leads to overstimulation and Severus is begging for Remus to stop. Remus wont stop until they are satistfied, ignoring Severus's moans of pleasured protest.
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Your prompt: NSFW Severus wants sex but Sirius is feeling naughty and makes them beg for it.
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Your prompt: Sirius holding Severus's hands when they are shaking.
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Your prompt:
James: *Gets 8 hours of sleep MINIMUM each night* "I am so awake and ready for the day! The sun is beautiful and I am so happy to be alive!"
Severus: I've had 30 minutes of sleep for the past five days and now I can smell sounds. Please kill me.
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Your prompt: They meet when Severus sees James walk into a street sign.
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Your prompt: Severus is baking cookies and has to split their attention between watching the timer and fighting off James, who keeps trying to steal cookie dough from the bowl.
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Your prompt:
Severus and James: *At a basketball game*
Severus and James: *Gets on the Kiss Cam*
Severus: *Blushing like crazy, covering their head*
James: *Making and obvious no gesture*
Crowd: *Boos*
Severus and James: *Kiss Cam comes back to them several times during the game and both object*
James fed up with this bullshit after the millionth time: OH FOR CHRIST'S SAKE!!
James:*Grabs Severus by the collar, kissing them*
Crowd: *Cheers loudly*
Severus: *Sits quietly for half an hour, staring ahead blankly in shock*
Severus: I wonder why the camera kept coming back to us?
James: *Shrugs and continues to watch the game*
Sirius and Remus, slipping a hundred bucks to the nearby cameraman: Thank you, my good sir.
*****************
Your prompt: Sirius lightly kissing Severus on top of a freshly formed bruise.
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Your prompt: NSFW Severus and Sirius as the main leads in a play. There's a sex scene in the play, and they get so into the moment that they end up going off the script, and talk dirty to each other, before having real sex on the stage. The audience all think they’re just acting, and the reviews commend them for their realistic take on sex.
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Your prompt: Police Officer AU Sirius is a police officer with a K-9 companion and Severus works at the donut shop that Sirius visits every morning with their dog. Severus first falls in love with the dog, then the person who parents it.
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Your prompt: NSFW It's a Winter night and it's snowing pretty heavily outside. Severus complains that they are cold so Remus picks them up, grabs a blanket then walks over to the fire. Remus proceeds to wrap themselves up with Severus and they cuddle by the fire. A few moments later, Remus starts to kiss and bite their way down Severus's neck. Severus becoms flustered as asks what Remus is doing. Remus just replies with "I'm warming you up, Severus" in a seductive voice. It soon leads to slow, steamy sex by the fire.
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Your prompt: Imagine Remus running up behind Severus and quickly picking them up and spinning them around, setting them back down and placing Severus's head on their chest and Remus's chin now resting on their head. Before Severus can ask what has got them in such a good mood today, they whisper, "I just realized how in love I am with you and it feels fantastic."
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Your prompt: NSFW Remus and Severus the morning they have had sex. Severus decides to go shower and Remus notices *fluid* runnning down Severus's legs, Aroused again, Remus follows Severus into the shower where they go again.
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Your prompt: Imagine that Severus was in an abusive relationship before they were with Remus. One day, Severus accidentally breaks something (a plate, vase, etc), and while Remus isn't mad at all, Severus starts crying and whispering Please don't hurt me over and over again. (Because in their past relationship, breaking something would have resulted in abuse). Remus gently wraps their arms around Severus and tells them in a kind voice that they would never hurt Severus, and that Remus promises to keep Severus safe at all costs.
**********
Your prompt:
Severus, is playing piano: Maybe one day I can play at your wedding.
Remus: Gross, I don't want you playing at my wedding.
Remus: How about you stand beside me instead?
*********
Your prompt:
Severus: God give me patience.
Remus: I believe the saying is 'God give me strength.'
Severus: If God gave me strength, everyone would be dead.
********
Your prompt: NSFW Remus pinning Severus down, locking their gazes together for a few moments, and then slowly trailing kisses down Severus's body. They get encouraged by the soft mewling Severus makes, and it ends in sweet, slow and romantic sex.
*******
Your prompt: Remus having to help Severus undress after an injury.
******
Your prompt: NSFW Imagine Sirius and Severus sitting at a table in a public place. They play a game, unknown to the people around them, in which Sirius gradually moves their hand up Severus's leg under the table. The game is to see how close Severus can let Sirius's hand get to there between their thighs before they chicken out and stop them.
*****
Your prompt: NSFW Sirius making Severus dress in really kinky underwear and later takes their sweet time to enjoy the view as Severus blushes heavily and is quite embarrassed.
****
Your prompt: Severus and Sirius were supposed to go out for a date but a snow storm hits and they get snowed in. Sirius is really sad about it so Severus builds them a blanket fort so they can spend the evening snuggling and watching Christmas movies together.
***
Your prompt: NSFW Severus is a virgin and Sirius practically worships their body the first time they have sex, giving every part of them attention in order to make it enjoyable for Severus.
**
Your prompt: NSFW Sirius teasing Severus with sex toys.
*
Your prompt: Severus screams at the top of their lungs and when James comes running to them, they find Severus standing on top of a chair screaming about a spider. Bonus: James is also afraid of spiders.
You can change the characters to ones you think work better