Guilt - Blog Posts

Psyche Weeping, Kinuko Y. Craft I Ophelia, Friedrich Wilhelm Theodor Heyser

Do you guys remember how kidnap fantasies were popular on wattpad because young girls and queer teens were both made to feel shame at the thought of their own sexualities, so the fantasy of being kidnapped totally against their will was a way for them to engage with a romantic or sexual fantasy without feeling morally in the wrong for doing so? Added bonus that the fantasy involved being whisked away from repressive environments like home or school, right?

Finding out that Bram Stoker was in a sexless marriage and that scholars believe that he very likely was closeted gay puts the entire book into perspective as to WHY it reads EXACTLY like a self insert wattpad Dracula kidnap fic:

“I TOTALLY love my wife and would never do anything that an upstanding Good Straight Working Man wouldn’t do but oh nooo, big strong man with broad back and strong enough arms to carry me back to bed like a princess trapped me and claimed me as his, completely against my will 👉👈 But he protects me against the bad evil sexual women (who I assure you, I am TOTALLY sexually attracted to, as any straight man with a choice would be) but trust me, I do NOT want ANY of this. What’s that? The Count is not capable of feeling love? Would be a shame if I had the special ability to change tha-”

Chuuya's backstory is so insane because like, any one event from 15-Stormbringer would be enough to constitute a lesser man's entire tragic backstory. Heck, that one scene from Dead Apple where you learn six of his friends died would be enough to be a tragic backstory. Grew up on the streets, forced to become the leader of a group of children who only saw you as a weapon, struggling with your own humanity, betrayal, five friends being brutally murdered because of you, even the detective who wanted to bring him out of the Mafia dying could be enough of a backstory, and I haven't even gotten to the torture yet. But Chuuya's just special like that.

Whump Prompt #595

Submitted by Anon - thanks!

There’s a huge misunderstanding and character B ends up hurting character A out of anger for something it turns out they didn’t actually do. B’s guilt when the truth is revealed is immeasurable.

The Way I'm Sure Mice Are Meant To Die

I'm not always sure what God's I worship

I'm not always sure of my own morals

I'm not always sure of my theories of the afterlife

But something I am sure of and always have been is my belief in mother earth

And my hatred of cruel glue traps

I know the mice are not meant to be here

If I were fast enough to catch them to release I would

But I know I am not

So if it must come to a trap I will use something that is fast

Because between a quick bullet to the brain execution or a long tortureous death of struggle and starvation

I think all of us would choose the first choice

Mind you this creature is dying for such a petty crime

Just trying to survive somewhere they don't even know they shouldn't be

When it's over I'll bury him

The mouse in my room that will soon be in a trap that I've set

And I'll feel bad for murdering something more innocent than my own kind

But I will feel better knowing he did not suffer

And that I return him to the earth from which he came

Become throwing a creature of earth

of flesh and bone once granted life

Into layers of plastic with the pollution bound for a graveyard of garbage

It feels so wrong

Even as a child I knew that

It goes against all nature and worse starves earth of her meal

It's take with no true give

I'll likely repeat this to deaf ears of family

When they find me digging a hole for a pest

If I had a choice I'd be buried with no coffin

But I know I don't

So all I can do is hope for the cheapest one

Made of the softest wood

Something easy to rot

I'd rather not keep mother earth waiting long for her meal

For now I'll give her back the small mouse that wandered away from her to my own den

And hope she sees his death not as unatural cruelty but as predator sharing prey

The way I'm sure mice are meant to die

i love characters angstily refusing to look at someone

when they’re ashamed or guilty or scared and they want to keep the peace for just a little longer. they know it’s going to go downhill soon so they’re holding onto the last little shred of calmness they have even if it’s fake

and then the character they’re worried about being mad gently grips their chin and says in a quiet voice “hey, can you look at me?” AAAAA then they hesitate. there’s no way that character isn’t mad at them, this is too good to be true. it just makes them refuse to look up more because they want this dream to last forever and ever

but after a few moments of holding back, they slowly look up, tears in their eyes, to see that the character truly isn’t upset with them. if anything, the character visibly relaxes when they finally make eye contact, confirming to the character that, maybe they’re not okay right now, but they will be eventually

bonus points if they’re injured somehow, esp on their face, and the person that’s holding them drags a finger near the wound in concern, examining it and making sure it’s not worse than it looks 😍😍😍

Keto Margarita - Cocktail This low-calorie natural sweetener- and orange-flavored sparkling water-based keto margarita is a cool beverage you can enjoy guilt-free.

It's so hard to not feel guilty about being upset at the people who mistreated you. Especially parents.

"But she gave me soup and stuff when I was sick. She even cried when I told her I was having dark thoughts."

Yes but she also basically told me to end myself, showed clear favoritism, frequently used corporal punishment, and a whole laundry list of other things.

It's so hard because she hasn't done too many harmful things as of recent. I just keep waiting for the other shoe to drop and it almost feels like I'm being overly dramatic about it now. It almost feels like maybe it was all in my head in the first place.

Then I remember that I was so desperate to get away when I was younger. Desperate enough to think about taking drastic measures. Desperate enough to dream about someone just taking me away from my family.

And then I feel guilty again five minutes later

People keep telling me my job is supposedly easy, but it's not to me. It's so hard every damn day. and I feel guilty because I'm making more money than plenty of people who have it way worse, but I've gotten so depressed. I don't feel like it's worth it most of the time. I'm off 2 days a week, the building has air conditioning, and we get an hour for lunch, which is more than most people, but I'm still so upset all the time. And being so guilty about it is even worse.